A different take on this issue:

You are to blame: you are absent.

Your subconscious is your co-pilot, your servant, maintaining the house in order and waiting for you to arrive and turn the whole place into the mess. He's there to give order to the chaos: subconscious, the god of heuristic and practicalities.
We are but arrogant entities when faced with the world of dreaming: we assume the subconscious is controlling the dream (fight him, punish him!). We feel left out of this battle of conflicts, where emotions and plot spin so fast that remarkable things disappear, all in the service of fast pacing experiences. But no: we are to blame, we are absent. Our subconscious is merely there working things out, giving order to the chaos.
Because he is forced: to serve the adaptive process of learning and memory recycling, the subconscious must weave coherent inconsistencies, else the system will crumble to dust and we will most likely wake up: we weren't made to be lucid. So when the judgement is made, who will be chosen? The servant, or the master?
Of course it's the entity that is keen in finding shortcuts that allow the being to maintain the specified function without interruption: the subconscious doesn't ask, he just acts: an odd event that has an explanation, a reason that exists for a purpose, the end justifies the means.
A dream can be viewed as an absence of the awareness of the self: there is no YOU as agent, there is only YOU as receptor. But praise the subconscious who's keeping things tidy: he's not fighting us for lucidity, but the fact is that he too is unaware of our presence: a clock is showing 28:0A? Self isn't here, let me do my job and we'll just assume it's broken, yes we're good to go.

It's a nocturnal dance where everybody is in the dark: you both spin without seeing your partner, and the causes each one to do their thing. The only problem is that you had the bad luck of being left dancing outside the room, probably because you're the most clumsy of the two ^^