I'm getting tired now. It's been over a year of journalling and apple juice drinking and reality checking and mantra saying and early nights and getting up at 4am...

And all I got was about a cumulative 7 seconds of lucid dreams.

Should I even continue? Maybe it's just not for me. I wake up after dreams and get annoyed that I have to note them down. I wake up without any dreams more and more often. They feel bland and uninspired. Never lucid.

I have done many things, but none have taken this much time and effort to achieve such little results.

I'm starting to wonder if I can even lucid dream, and whether or not I was just wasting my time. I used to think this was the shit, now it's just something to gradually forget.