> > I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for
> > the following
> > reasons:
> >
> >
> >
> > I do physical labor.
> > I work at great depths.
> > I plunge head first into everything I do.
> > I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
> > I work in a damp environment.
> > I don't get paid overtime.
> > I work in a dark workplace that has poor
> > ventilation.
> > I work in high temperatures.
> > My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
> > Dear Penis:
> >
> >
> >
> > After assessing your request, and considering the
> > arguments you have raised, the administration
> > rejects your request for the following reasons:
> >
> >
> > You do not work 8 hours straight.
> > You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods.
> >
> > You do not always follow the orders of the
> > management team.
> > You do not stay in your designated area and are
> > often seen visiting
> > other locations.
> > You do not take initiative; you need to be pressured
> > and stimulated
> > in order to start working.
> > You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of
> > your shift.
> > You don't always observe necessary safety
> > regulations, such as
> > wearing the correct protective clothing.
> > You will retire well before you are 65.
> > You are unable to work double shifts.
> > You sometimes leave your designated work before you
> > have completed
> > the assigned task.
> > And if that were not all, you have been seen
> > constantly entering and exiting the workplace
> > carrying two suspicious looking bags.
> >
> >
> > Sincerely,
> >
> >
> >
> > The Management