The Jesus Suit

**InTheMoment** · 11-09-2005 10:01 PM

Best when read with a thick hillbilly accent...

The Jesus Suit

Well, I made man
And Man done sinned.
So I beat him up good
But he did it agin.
I knew that he would,
And then I thought "Shoot!
It's time to dress up
In my Jesus Suit."

So I got me some bones
And some flesh and some blood.
Had it made by the best
And it fit pretty good.
Kinda tight round the chest
But I looked real cute,
All dressed up
In my Jesus Suit.

Then I came down to Earth
Walked around like a man.
Which I was, in a way
I don't quite understand.
Fully man, so they say,
With divine attributes.
Holy Gawd, wholly clothed
In my Jesus Suit.

Humans owed me a debt
And I wanted it paid.
Should I murder them all
Again? Nah... too depraved.
So to pay for The Fall
I was their substitute
And I got myself killed
In my Jesus Suit.

Pretty whack, dontcha think?
I know it don't make sense.
My accountant's on crack -
That's my only defense.
Anyways, I'll be back
- So objections are moot -
Soon as I get the blood stains
Outta my Jesus Suit.

**Universal Mind** · 11-10-2005 04:33 AM

Did you write that? That is some really good satire.

**InTheMoment** · 11-10-2005 03:51 PM

lol...nah, it's actually the lyrics to this song parody on a local radio station here. They have this guy that sounds like Larry the Cable Guy singing it...it's hilarious, when sung over a banjo.

**nina** · 11-10-2005 04:02 PM

Of course he didn't write it. Don't you know no one is original anymore?

**InTheMoment** · 11-10-2005 04:19 PM

Originally posted by Aquanina
Of course he didn't write it. Don't you know no one is original anymore?

Ok ok...here's something original...in fact I just wrote it.

Give me, Give me

Give me, give me,
I want it now.
And if I don’t get it,
I’ll have a cow.

Give me, give me,
You guys suck.
Say something funny,
You lame ass fuck.

Give me, give me,
My life is dull.
Entertain me dolt,
Or a hump your skull.

Give me, Give me,
You Stupid Whore.
Give me, Give me,
Or I’ll whine some more!

**nina** · 11-10-2005 04:26 PM

Now that was brilliant. Truly inspirational. Let's fuck.

edit: I think "stupid whore" should have been in there somewhere...

**InTheMoment** · 11-10-2005 04:58 PM

Ok, suggestion added...but only because fucking is part of the deal.

**Rakkantekimusouka** · 11-10-2005 06:35 PM

Awesome, ITM, simply awesome!

**OpheliaBlue** · 11-10-2005 09:23 PM

that's hot James

I'm inexplicably drawn toward you

it's...it's.........it's the way you WORD things I CAN'T HELP MYSEEEEEEEEEEEEFLAFLAFFLEAFFLEAFFLE

**InTheMoment** · 11-10-2005 09:59 PM

Originally posted by OpheliaBlue
it's...it's.........it's the way you WORD things I CAN'T HELP MYSEEEEEEEEEEEEFLAFLAFFLEAFFLEAFFLE

I'll take that quiff as a compliment.

~

**nina** · 11-10-2005 10:10 PM

*holds imaginary microphone up to her mouth*

HAVE I TOOOOOLD YOU LATELY...............THAT I LOVE YOU.

**Rakkantekimusouka** · 11-11-2005 12:18 AM

Originally posted by Aquanina
*holds imaginary microphone up to her mouth*

HAVE I TOOOOOLD YOU LATELY...............THAT I LOVE YOU.

Oh god, not the Whitney Houston impression again.

**OpheliaBlue** · 11-11-2005 12:51 AM

dude that's Rod Stewart

**Rakkantekimusouka** · 11-11-2005 02:05 AM

Originally posted by OpheliaBlue
dude that's Rod Stewart

Oh shit, my bad.

I guess the only Rod Stewart song I've ever heard is Rhythm of My Heart, so I wouldn't know.

I love that song -- was on one of my Mom's homemade compilation cassette tapes. So many memories...*sniff*

**Oneironaut Zero** · 11-11-2005 03:42 AM

Originally posted by Aquanina
Of course he didn't write it. Don't you know no one is original anymore?

I resent that.

.....Ok..that avatar of yours has bought your way out of this one....but just this once....That seductive hypno-shit won't work on me anymore!!!

(....Lol...damn...that was so unconvincing I should kick my Own ass.

)

**nina** · 11-11-2005 01:51 PM

Ok guys...from now on senseless stays in senseless...got it?

**Nirvana Starseed** · 11-25-2005 01:12 AM

Originally posted by ob+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ob)</div>

hat's hot James

I'm inexplicably drawn toward you

it's...it's.........it's the way you WORD things I CAN'T HELP MYSEEEEEEEEEEEEFLAFLAFFLEAFFLEAFFLE[/b]

<!--QuoteBegin-inthemoment
I'll take that quiff as a compliment. ~

I'm glad I can't put my head in the sand as well as you guys,

**Ex Nine** · 12-15-2005 07:11 AM

Ah! The blood stains!

That's we're all waiting for? For those to come out?!

Everybody pay for cleanliness!! It is next to Godliness!!

**Neruo** · 12-21-2005 04:26 PM

Best. Song. Ever.

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