Wolfwood
Deuteragonist

I never say I am a Pikachu! I just like Pikachu. And I'm not into cosplay.

Tail shouldn't be a problem but er electricity? That sounds like a fetish.

Have you seen the Pikachu hat I posted in the chill and rambling thread?

Why don't I have dreams that are this intense? X) Sounds like a pretty fun time to me. I'm sure I'll be back soon enough....

And I hope you're ready for more, because that was just a quick taste.

Did you like my laugh? I hope it was satisfactory.

(continued)

I trained myself to not care about that feeling. It's just an anxiety reaction... doesn't mean anything. At least, that's how it works with things like weed. I try to avoid things that I can't say for certain are perfectly safe now for that reason, it makes it considerably harder to talk yourself down from panic. The blue lotus gave me lots of bad feelings at first, like all of my organs were failing or something... turns out I just needed to burp, like usual. Of course, I knew that's how it was going to be right from the start, but that doesn't make the ride any less uncomfortable.

Pretty much. X) Actually, today I've felt a little stimulation again. I don't think I could handle that level of horniness right now. It'd be too much of a tease... I already feel like I'm getting tired of masturbating, I need something more. >w<

(continued)

Oh wow, piracetam only by prescription? :O That's too bad, but at least you can still get it. There are plenty of alternatives too, all of which have varying rates of success from person to person. I've tried aniracetam and that was interesting but not quite for me, it has an anti-anxiety effect that the others seem to be lacking in and also displayed some mildly psychedelic qualities in me. I was able to consciously remove my visual processing while listening to good music and meditating to place myself further into the audio experience. However, it also gave me some brain fog after a couple weeks of using it.... Some people prefer it to piracetam, though. Noopept seems interesting, but I haven't really looked into it much before. I've heard good things about drugs that raise BDNF before so it seems like it'd be worth a shot. And I've used piracetam with weed before, it didn't really help with memory but it did make it more like I was a newbie stoner again.

Well, I'm pretty immobile after I orgasm too, but that doesn't mean I don't want to cuddle. Interestingly, in addition to prolactin, dopamine is also inversely correlated with serotonin. Girls normally have much higher serotonin levels than guys (and vice-versa for dopamine), so that possibly has something to do with the MDMA feelings - our serotonin receptors are probably activated to a significant enough degree to create the bonding effects while yours aren't so much. It's definitely powerful... much cleaner and purer than the chemical feel of MDMA, a sort of blinding euphoria in the sense that I'd bet a strong enough orgasm could temporarily fool me into thinking I was in love in the same way that MDMA can (and has), it's all-encompassing. I look forward to experiencing it more often some day. >w<

(continued)

I drank a little the other night and smoked some blue lotus - a non-hallucinogenic herb - and I was in my backyard at night. The tree beyond our fence looked like it was on fire, and there were exploding diamond patterns of purple, light blue, and orange making V shapes all over it, and it was pulsing and twisting in several different directions at once. Are yours that bad?

I see. >w< Lol, my subconscious is headed in the complete opposite direction right now. I don't think I've really been horny since I stopped smoking weed. It's odd, because, as I said, I didn't even really develop any sense of normal sexuality at all until very recently, and it only really strengthened at the same time I started smoking weed again, so now that I'm not high I feel almost asexual. Though, I suppose it might rebound again after I've abstained for a while.

I could probably come up with some pretty nice sedatives. I actually can sometimes get off more easily if I'm feeling lazy, it just won't be quite as rewarding. Pfft, fall asleep or become immobile... sounds boring. Yeah, I've tried piracetam with MDMA before. I took five tabs, but my tolerance was really high at the time and normally that would have had me nice and relaxed with a good body buzz and a slight conversational attitude, but mostly I normally would've been chilling on couches at the club just kind of observing stuff and enjoying the high. Instead, I ended up ranting to a friend on and on about something I don't even remember now, and my eyes were shaking soooo much and I was constantly moving, at one point she just stopped me and said "You look like you're on fucking crack!" Short answer: it works. For most people, anyway, from what I hear.

(continued)

I'll take that as a compliment. Trust me, it only gets weirder the deeper you dig. And I'm sure you are a good boy, I wouldn't expect any differently. Sometimes it can be tough... typically it gets easier the further a relationship is established because people get to know me better too, but it's not always easy being the one who everyone lets themselves be weak around... it means you always have to be the strong one. It used to bother me more than it does now, though. Somewhere down I realized that that's the price you have to pay if you truly want everyone to be happy. I have people that I can be weak to now as well, so it's not like there isn't a balance.

I'll PM you about the drug. I don't want my get-rich-quick scheme posted on a public page.