JreamDournal
Lurker

The dreams I had last night were the first I recorded and I hope that explaining them this way will train my subconscious to be aware of dreaming. I don't quite understand the technicalities so excuse the vague language. I didn't have a pleasant dream last night and I know it wasn't at all lucid because I was definitely cast in the role of the victim where things happen at me.
I had returned home from university but there was a school event I needed to go to, looking back this doesn't make sense at all, anyway that added pressures of the very everyday that seemed to have heightened importance; finding a pair of matching socks, not spilling cups of coffee, making sure plans don't clash. I remember very stressful situations, two members of my family were in my bedroom and seemed to take up all of the space which made me anxious. Then I went to a theatre type space, very large and crowded with many members of the audience heckling the person on the stage. The events was over and people started petering out of the room until only a few were left. I left the room and then there was a corridor with stairs going down different levels which I started descending the stairs and I remember hearing a very large man following me. He was singing so I could hear how close he was behind me. I remember running down, and this is how I know I was not in control, because it was almost as if my legs weren't moving the way I wanted to, I could feel myself willing them on but also my senses were blurred and I couldn't see but still hear this man's singing and feel him getting closer. I reached the door to the front row of the lecture theatre where I knew people, and safety, would be, but he caught my foot as soon as I was in the room and I was suspended up in the air at that very moment. Then I woke up.
I wouldn't say this was a nightmare but then I don't really know what makes a nightmare. It was a very pressurized, terrifying dream and when I woke up it was unsettled. I'd really like to be able to have reality checks in those kinds of environments so I can make decisions and do cool stuff, but I would also like to have greater sensual awareness because I do feel the scariest part was the dislocation of not being able to see at all. Moreover, I don't normally get anxious when I'm in large crowds, and I welcome people into my room rather than feeling that they are invading it. Sometime I feel like the person in my dreams is completely different from myself.