you may need to give yourself that push. it kind of reminds me of the saying "no one likes beer the first time" (though not always true). but you make yourself have it a few times and later down the road you have come accustomed to the flavor. its no longer making yourself drink it, now its more along the lines of you do it because you like it more. maybe making yourself try to to concentrate enough on meditation, sometime from now you will begin to enjoy it more and it will feel more natural. but you need not force yourself to go for 30 mins, just like you wouldnt force yourself to drink a lot the first few times. practice taking it slow the first few times like 5 minutes or 10 minutes. i hope that makes sense, i kinda related two completely different things but it seemed like it made sense (At least in my mind) and i hope that may help you in some way, which is what im going for. any help, even a small amount, is better than none!