Okay here's the thing. Last night I went to bed around 4 am. I was just lying in bed..All of a sudden the thought of moving my arm without moving it came across my mind. So I moved my arm..but my body wasn't reacting though my lucid body was. I was like hey that's funny..and after that I fell asleep. I woke up and immediately noticed there was something wrong. I was in my old room and my old bed and I felt so sick that I wanted to throw up. I knew I was in a dream again. But it was different this time. So I sat on the edge of my bed. Still shaking and feeling sick. So I sat for a while and noticed the lights going on and off in my room. Hmm I thought, let's prove it is a dream. I slapped myself in the face and I didn't feel anything. But I don't want to know that I am dreaming I just want to let my irrational mind take control and let the thoughts flow. I just wanted to wake up.
But my mind had another thing in store for me. Ever had that feelign that you can't concentrate on your thoughts? That you can't really hear yourself thinking because of the noise in your head. Well, something of someone thought it was funny to play the radio in my head. And I knew at that point that that person wasn't originally created by my own mind. I rather thought of a ghost interfering my dream. Like he or she also sneaked in and that that was the reason my body and mind were sepparated this night. Anyway I was dying to wake up.. But I just didn't know what to do. I knew my body was sleeping.
So I thought after the freaking thing stopped that radio 'lets try to scream as loud as i ca'n, maybe my sleeping body will make a noise to and wake herself.; So I started screaming.. no response.. After a while i gave up and the other person left but left the radio on.. So I stepped back in bed again..covering my ears though I couldnt stop the noise ofcourse.. and I fell asleep. I woke up. Another room..the same bed. I was like NOO fucking hell..before I could say anything out loud the noise started again. I need to get out I don't want to be aware of all this.. I kinda freaked out, cos my alarm was on radio stance as well so I feared that the noise in my head would overrule the noise of the alarm so that i would oversleep or worse not wake up at all. So I just sat on the bed again.. just waiting for myself to wake up..not knowing what to do.. cause leaving the room had no purpose, i wouldnt be leaving the dreamworld anyway by leaving it. So I waited and waited..and fell asleep..and woke up in a few other rooms also.till I woke up again in my own bed..ofcourse not believing it was real that I was back...
Seriously. now I know what it is like to be trapped in your own mind. I never want to go through that again!