Dreams of my recently deceased father . . . HELP!!!!

I have had a few dreams about my deceased father. He passed away a little over 2 months ago. I was his only child and he had raised me by himself for 19 years. He wasn't married, so I was his ONE AND ONLY. His death was very sudden and tragic and he was my best friend, mother, and father.

The first dream I had was very comforting. He came to the house that I currently live in and I answered the door. He was smiling at me and was wanting in. I asked him," What are you doing here? You're dead. You died on Decemeber 7th." I don't remember his exact response, but it was like he didn't die. I told him about his memorial that I had for him and how much he would've enjoyed it. How I followed exactly what he told me what he wanted. I also told him that his Dad and Step-Mom didn't come. He seemed very hurt, but he had a few harsh words to say about that. I don't remember everything else that happened, but I know when I woke up, I was very happy. I was able to see him and hear his voice again and that was a relief.

The second dream wasn't as pleasant: In my dream, I was in my house but it wasn't my current house, and I just happened to look to my right and he was standing once again outside. THis time he was at a sliding glass door and was smiling and was wanting in. I, of course, let him in and I asked him the same questions,"What are you doing here? You're dead." He responded (and I remember clearly),"No, I'm not. I have been down at the border." I asked him why he left and he said that I didn't respect him so why should he stick around. The dream continued and I don't remember what happened in between, but I do remember that him and one of his friends were kind of running away from me. He was on his motorcycle and I was in his truck and he was speeding off and I was trying desperatley to keep up while I was crying. He finally stopped when he got to a Wal-Mart or something. He got off the bike and was walking away and I parked the truck and trying to keep up. The next thing I remember, he's hugging his ex-wife and I am yelling at him. I remember asking him why he was doing this to me after all that I had done for him and his response was," Yeah, everything you've done for me while I've been gone, but what did you ever do for me before?" That enraged me because I couldn't believe he was saying these things. He also said," All the times I called you and left a message and it would take you a week to return my damn call!" At that point, I could no longer hold in my anger and I started yelling and cussing. I walked back to the truck and as I was shutting the door, his ex-wife approached me. I've never been a violent person to the point that I hit anyone, but in my dream, all I remember is just punching her in her head. At that point, I forced myself to wake up and when I did I was very upset and crying etc. THe wierd thing is, I have no idea where those accusations came from. That's what upset me most, because I didn't know if that is how he is really feeling right now.

I had a third dream, I knew I had a dream about him, but I could only remember bits and pieces of it. THen when I woke up, I couldn't remember anything. When I got to work that morning, my sister called me and told me she had a dream a couple weeks ago about my dad. We're half sisters and we don't share the same Dad. She said that in her dream she was sleeping and she had this wierd feeling. SO, she went and opened the front door. He was standing there once again and he was smiling. She said that he was cradling a paper bag. She never asked him what it was, but assumed it was a 6-pack of beer. She said she felt like she was expecting him and like it was normal for him to come over. SHe said that she let him in and they were sitting on her couch. She said the wierd thing was that they were talking, but their lips weren't moving, he was just sitting there smiling. She said that he told her,"Don't worry about Nikki (which is me), she will be fine. I am happy and you dont' need to worry." She said he kept on repeating that. THen he said,"I do want you to pass a message to Nikki for me. Tell her that I am happy where I am, not to worry, and that she will be okay and she'll do fine." She said that the dream ended and when she woke up, she felt very calm.

If anyone has any response to these dreams and can help me better understand the coincidences of him always being at a door and smiling, I'd appreciate it. Any feedback at all will be appreciated. Thanks.

First, welcome! :D Go Hokies!

Second, no body but yourself can really interpret your dream.
If I could hazard a guess, I'd say that it is your spirit trying to come to some sense of closure. A couple of months is not really a lot of time to even begin to get over such a loss.

Do you feel better now after these dreams? Maybe just a little bit calmer and more at peace?


EDIT: Removed double post from Newbie section

Welcome! :breakitdown: :cheers: :D :fro:

In real life, how did your father die? Anything strange about his death? Was he suddenly inclined on reading books, for example, before his death?

First of all im sorry for your loss :( second of all I cant tell you what your dreams mean but maybe these guesses could get you on the right track. I think the more nasty dreams could reflect your frustration with his immediate death. Do you feel sort of abandoned maybe in the sense that you feel like your left behind by his sudden death? Overall I would say that such a quick death would leave alot of tensions in your family unresolved and your looking for some answer in all of this. Give it time he loved you and would want you to do the best you could. The good dreams are what you should be focusing on maybe those suggest that he never really left. Maybe hes still there inside you. Its you remembering all the good times you had with him. Im sure hes at peace now and would not have abandoned you like in the other dream. At least you have your sister to help you through this. I cant be sure these are just guesses. Best of luck hope you feel better :(

"at a door and smiling" sounds to me like your dad is content with the threshold he's gotten involved with. I too, believe dreams are best interpreted by the dreamer, but the image is a strong one to me. Doors are also places where we regularly run into people, so it also just makes sense to meet someone at a door, rather than say, in your closet.

That second dream where issues pops up sounds so typical to me. Seriously, I get like deja vu from your post and the pattern goes ~exactly~ like this to me:

Dream One: you see a loved one that's passed on, it's good and they're happy
Dream Two: you seem to have been a disappointment some how, or a problem
Dream Three: hard to remember but they were there

I'm not joking, I feel like I've had these same set of dreams. As for the second one, I just chalk it up to covering all our bases and doing analysis. It can be discomforting, but is always such obvious bullshit, and I never end up truly thinking it reflects anyone's true feelings. Dream three is always like, a sign of moving on to me.

But again, sit with interpretations yourself and see what feels best. Sometimes a cigar, right?