Good night all, I am here for one reason... today during my morning sleep (I wake up after 11am) I had one of the most difficult dream experiences in my whole life, I am 34 and have been having lucid dreams for over 25 years already, I used to keep track of my dreams, until after 6 years ago when I broke up with my 4year girlfriend, after that she got married 3 years ago and I havent seen her since... I am aware she had a kid and is living with the husbands family... just making some history for people to understand my dream.

I was asleep and knew I was sleeping still couldnt control my dream, knew I was dreaming... I was picking my ex girlfriend up from a location (I had 2 dreams before this one, 1 of my cousin that lives in the US with 2 dogs and my mother and a 2nd one of my sister and my 2 cousins from my dads family that were in a sort of mall) so I got out to meet with her, but we were already in the car (taxi) she was telling me that I only have 3 days with her because she had to go to another country, she showed me 2 bags of stuff that I dont recall at this point, but it was all she had a the moment, so we were driving down a hill where traffic on the opposite direction was terrible but the taxi driver was driving carefully, at some point I recall grasping and graving her boobs, which is the beginning of the dream and the reason why I recognized her, then licking one of the nipples, the conversation went on about going somewhere and then I told her that we should grab my car instead of taking the taxi. I was about to tell the taxi driver to head to my house with thinking exactly where to go from a specific area... at that point I woke up, sat down on my bed realized it was a dream... and sent a message to my best friend try to explain her, tears started dropping from my eyes, I couldnt stop... I still dont understand this is the first time a feeling has arisen from a dream with her, I had dreamt of her before normally that dream will mean to me a sign for a really bad day, like the worst days are when I dream of her, but today was not bad, just felt sad about the dream... then I researched and found out that when people have this kind of dreams its because the person is dead... I am worried as I CANT and will not try to contact her... I am really not ready for that, but I am worried that something bad has happened to her.

Can someone help me try to understand why all of a sudden, 3 years after I stopped seen her? and why? thanks and sweet dreams all.