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    1. #1
      Member A Lost Soul's Avatar
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      About Drugs

      I wanted to add my two cents about the drug thing, because that thread has been a floater for awhile now. Forgive me for waxing personal.

      Don't ever believe anyone who says that drugs are ok and what you've been fed is propaganda or whatever. They don't know shit and damn them for assuming that any single person can exhibit the self-control it takes to smoke weed or pop pills. As I said before, I don't really have a problem with drugs and drinking, if you have self control. Whatever tops you off. Who am I to judge anyone?

      But when you look to chemicals to instigate a change in your life, then it becomes a problem. It's like you suddenly become this different person. Obsessive. Sneaky, but obvious at the same time. Angry. Like the world owes you something for the shit hand you've been dealt. No one notices... so you do it more, because deep down you really want to get caught. Anything so someone will help. Then you get more daring. Like chasing pills.

      I don't know exactly why I did it. Why does anyone do stupid things? I think I know what sparked it off. The candles on the cake of my life, so to speak. It's not his fault, though. He just had bad timing. Everything I've encountered on the path of my life, all of my personal burdens, had built so much that I was beginning to lose my balance. It just happened to be his foot that I tripped over. He doesn't love me. So fucking what? I should have just shrugged it off. Not like it's really any skin off my back. I should have been like, "Whatever, sucker, it's your loss." But I wasn't. For some reason, I took it very personally and I let it drag me down. I let myself drown. I started chasing pills. I liked how it knocked me the fuck out. The blackness of sleep was comfortable. But I always woke up again... and to this day, I still don't know why...

      I did it right under everyone's nose. A part of me was hoping that someone would catch me, that he would notice that there was something different about me... and care. But you know what? He didn't notice. I shouldn't have been surprised. It was stupid to expect a man to notice from so far away. But what's even sadder was that no one else noticed either. Not even the people I was living in the same house with.

      It's all water under the bridge now. I don't understand why I'm so friggin stupid sometimes. No one could rescue me, especially not someone who lived a billion miles away. The only person who could change things at that point was me. The only person you ever have in life is yourself. No matter how much you are in love with someone, or how close a friend someone is, or how close you are to your families, always keep that in the back of your mind.

      The only person you ever have in life is you.

      I used to have a personal saying: We are, each of us, angels with one wing and we can fly only by embracing each other.

      I'll fly on my own, thanks.
      And by the way, I've been 'clean' for almost two weeks now. Yay me.

      “Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.”
      - Kurt Cobain (1967 – 1994)

    2. #2
      Generic lucid dreamer Seeker's Avatar
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      Well said! :bravo:
      you must be the change you wish to see in the world...
      -gandhi

    3. #3
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      There are times in life for everything, and if you stumble through life never experiencing certain things and hiding in fear from them, then you are a fool. If you stumble through life looking for escape because you are already afraid or angry, then drugs will destroy you, prescription ones or illegal ones. If you are at a party with some friends and you take some hits and drink some beers, then I don't understand who or what you are hurting, but if you start smoking and drinking every day, then your life becomes covered in foggy despair. There are extremes in every case, and not everything is the way you see it. Just because you were caught in the throws of despair doesn't mean everyone else in the world is. Although, I do agree that a lot of us are. Life is an experience, and our mind is a gift. However, it is always the person that takes up things in life and makes them important. Certain addictions are worse than others, but I guess it's all perspective. Cigarettes are accepted by society as not being a big deal, because their actual mental effects are low, however, they're basically just killing the populous slowly. I'm not sure about anyone else, but that's far worse than almost any drug I can think of. I've been to the depths and back, and I'm fucking glad, personally, but that's because I got to see humanity tearing each other limb from fucking limb, and I thought it was beautiful to see the incarante hedonism that truly drives us, instead of living in the idiotic lie of rules and regulations. The problem is that society makes us sketched out about substance abuse, it is deemed wrong, and therefore it is exciting, it seems more dangerous and possibly fun. That makes more people do it than probably would in normal structures, and it makes people treat it differently. In other cultures, they don't care as much, so if you do something like that... your just doing it, it's no longer some thrill ride or occasion... you still have to get on with your life. It's all bullshit though, some people shouldn't ever do drugs. We're all human though, doesn't everyone understand that? We're not machines, we're not fucking supposed to live the way we do. Our life style is making the porblems of our society, and not anything else. The industrialized and consumerist way of life are destroying humanity, making us drones and that's the REAL cause of our societies problems(and much of the worlds). We sit where we're told to sit, how we're told to sit, and do what we're told to do how we're told to do it. No room for thinking or creativity, except in our free time, and we are convinced all day by advertisements that we need all these surrogate activities and items to compensate our need for goals and motives. We live surrogate lies and consume consume consume. Why do you think drugs are so bad? We're told to eat everything else up all day, so how would we know to treat drugs any differently? Where is the moderation in our society? We are provided all our basic survival needs with minimum effort, we don't have to try and even survive these days. We instead get caught up in trying to force ourselves into some pre-defined role, or try and find a way to fit ourselves into the roles of society. We find things to bury our free time in, usually trying to for things that are not achievable by us, so we get frustrated and spend our whole lives trying to fit the definition our society has created for "success". So when you freak out and start doing drugs, think about the reasons why your doing them, and put due blame on the object, acitivty, person, or whatever that your trying to escape from and don't do things for stupid reasons.... Quit trying to escape from everything and instead fucking change it. Don't live the way your told to, do what you want, and tell everyone else to eat the shit that they spew out of their stupid mouths. Quit being a slave, quit letting them control your mind, think for yourself.
      STOP CONFORMING!
      STOP CONSUMING!
      STOP OBEYING!
      I just can't understand how everyone eats up the propaganda so easily... look how much we're in check, look around at things that are happening in the world today, in politics, the people that govern the way we live are trying to destory us, and no one even cares to look around and see it. Drugs are just their tools. The government is the one feeding us all of them, even the illegal ones. Don't belive, I don't care, I've seen the proof. I won't be a SHEEP. I wont be a FOLLOWER. I'll do whatever, say whatever, and act however the fuck I want. Don't be like the government, don't try and tell ME how to live.

      I'm sorry Lost Soul that you went through all that shit, and I'm sorry you feel this way. And maybe your right, for YOU. We are human, we don't fit neatly into categories, don't stuff me into your generalizations. I'm not cubicle material, goddamnit. I guess I sound pissed off, and you can think I'm a foolish "conspirator", but if I don't win the war I'm helping to fight for all you people who think I'm a crazy, then you'll see that I was not mad. But if WE win, then... well... you people will probably never know or care. This FTAA thing that I keep throwing up here is SERIOUSLY fucked up. I don't care if you guys all think it is crap. I'm not going to be a part of a society that is helping to enslave other cultures and destroy it's own economy.

      STAND UP FOR YOUR RIGHTS TODAY!

      And... my last argument on the matter involves religion, and spirituality. "Drugs", as you deem them, have been used for thousands of years in religious and ceremonial rituals. I thought we had freedom of religion here! Woops... not if your religion involves something that falls outside the categories that are accepted in our society. There's a difference between a junkie, and a person whom uses certain substances on certain rare occasion to experience something that they believe is spiritual. QUIT GENERALIZING! CATEGORIES DON'T EXIST, WE CREATE THEM!

      So.... whatever... that's the gist of how I feel.
      "If seeing is believing, than we might as well be blind, because the searching leaves us faithless and the outcome undefined." - Cooter(indy punk band)

    4. #4
      Member Silver Sphere's Avatar
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      Hmmm.

      1) "Soft" drugs should be legalized; the "war on drugs" can fuck off
      2) I still wouldn't use them

      Anyone see that as a contradiction? I've never so much as smoked a cigarette. I've drank a bit, just enough to know that it's not for me. I honestly believe that without social pressure these addictions - any many other more dangerous ones - would not exist.

      I've been around enough people on drugs - many, many of them - to get the feeling that I'm not missing a whole lot. I wouldn't blame all their problems on drugs, and in fact I think most of them got along fairly well, all things considered... but I'm still not looking at them in envy. Some of them took a while to get it through their heads that what they were doing wasn't my bag, and that may have put a barrier between us, but I can live with that.

      I don't consider it a moral issue, though. I've never done "real" drugs for the same reason I've never watched an episode of Big Brother - not because my parents and teachers warned me about it, but because everything I know about it has led me to believe it offers nothing to me. And doing drugs just to prove I'm not afraid of them would just be stupid.

      [Second Attention- ranting is cool, but paragraph breaks are your friends ]

    5. #5
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      Originally posted by Silver Sphere
      Hmmm.

      1) \"Soft\" drugs should be legalized; the \"war on drugs\" can fuck off
      2) I still wouldn't use them

      Anyone see that as a contradiction?
      I didn't say that at all, you obviously didn't read it. I can look at my post and nowhere did I say anything about not using "soft" drugs, because I do, and also, nowhere did I say they should be legalized, but I don't think ANY drug should be illegal.

      Also... I'm at work, I don't have time for paragraphs.

      Third... didn't I say that not everyone should use drugs? And fourth, I never said that I did drugs to "prove I'm not afraid of them". Fifth, I never said I envy people that did drugs, nor did I say anyone else should.

      I think you misconstrued a lot of what I said.

      Drugs are bad when used in a bad way, any drug, illegal, legal, prescription, whatever.

      Used under the right knowledge, circumstances, and reasons, certain "drugs" are not necessarily harmful, or addictive.

      I'm saying depression and addiction are both results of our society and the horrible way in which we live. Drugs can emphasize those qualities in certain(if not most) people.

      Arguing completely different points.

      I'm not defending drug use or users, nor am I persecuting them, I'm saying the problem lies in our society.
      "If seeing is believing, than we might as well be blind, because the searching leaves us faithless and the outcome undefined." - Cooter(indy punk band)

    6. #6
      Member Silver Sphere's Avatar
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      Originally posted by Second Attention

      I didn't say that at all, you obviously didn't read it.

      [...]

      I think you misconstrued a lot of what I said.
      Uh... I wasn't really trying to argue with you there, actually, I'm not sure where you got that from. Just... my opinions really.

    7. #7
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      Well... what I quoted would be what I thought you were arguing about(mainly). It sounded, to me, that you were putting words in my mouth. If not, sorry. I just don't want anyone to misunderstand me. If they put something up here that I think is a misunderstood representation of something I said, of course I'm going to correct them and try to fully explain what I was trying to say. My words our my own, and I hate people twisting them, or even just misunderstanding them, because what I say is who I am. So.. like I said before, if you were just stating opinions of your own, than I'm sorry, I misinterpreted what YOU said.
      "If seeing is believing, than we might as well be blind, because the searching leaves us faithless and the outcome undefined." - Cooter(indy punk band)

    8. #8
      Member A Lost Soul's Avatar
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      I agree with you, Second Attention. Without knowledge, drugs and drinking are dangerous, addictive, negative things. For someone with a sound mind (whatever that is), and knowledge, drugs and drinking are fine, so long as they stay responsible. Throw in any 'mental illness' (I use the term loosely) such as depression or anxiety, peer pressure, 'propaganda' or whtaeverthehell, it becomes a potentially deadly situation. I wanted nothing more than to die, but that's something I've been dealing with since I was a little girl. Chasing pills only made it worse. And to be totally honest with you guys, I really have no clue why I'm even here typing this right now. I'm surprised that I woke up at all. But here I am, letting the world know I'm a crazy bitch.

      My whole point to starting this thread was this: before you delve into drugs, alcohol, or whatever, there are some things you need to do first. Research and observe. But most importantly: Know yourself.

      “Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.”
      - Kurt Cobain (1967 – 1994)

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      Yeah, totally, educate yourself about any and all substances you intend to ingest. Research MULTIPLE sources, especially if using the internet. Go to some anti-drug pages, and some pro-drug pages, and see the differences. Never consume ANYTHING without knowledge of what it is. Knowledge of what your doing is the most important thing.

      And Lost Soul, I'm really sorry. I had to carry my mom to the hospital for the same thing.. she tried to kill herself with pills.... and so have I. So, I do understand where your coming from. It's life that was fucking me and my mom up, though, drugs were just the way out.
      "If seeing is believing, than we might as well be blind, because the searching leaves us faithless and the outcome undefined." - Cooter(indy punk band)

    10. #10
      Member Silver Sphere's Avatar
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      Originally posted by Second Attention
      Well... what I quoted would be what I thought you were arguing about(mainly). It sounded, to me, that you were putting words in my mouth. If not, sorry. I just don't want anyone to misunderstand me. If they put something up here that I think is a misunderstood representation of something I said, of course I'm going to correct them and try to fully explain what I was trying to say. My words our my own, and I hate people twisting them, or even just misunderstanding them, because what I say is who I am. So.. like I said before, if you were just stating opinions of your own, than I'm sorry, I misinterpreted what YOU said.
      It's all cool, I don't want any kind of misunderstanding. They're very easy to have on the internet. I can see how you got what you did out of what I typed, so I s'pose I could've been more clear, but I really agree with you for the most part.

      Have a good day.

    11. #11
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      Originally posted by Silver Sphere

      1) \"Soft\" drugs should be legalized; the \"war on drugs\" can fuck off
      2) I still wouldn't use them
      I agree with one. It's a total waste of time and effort.

      If you look at going from softer drugs like weed to harder ones like heroin, people may do it because of the winter season (no weed), and they are looking for something else. That may also be why there is more meth up north. But, I don't know.

      Tobacco should be illegal. Weed should be legal, but held under strict fda limits (unlike garlic, I might add...). I think the legal limit anywhere should be .08 anywhere, and alcohol can only be of a certain content level.

      I don't waste my money on drugs anyway, btw.

    12. #12
      Member jill1978's Avatar
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      I wont deney that I have a weakness for the booze and drugs....it really is an escape, but I cant escape forever....so I definately have to create boundaries for myself....no booze more than once a week.
      "I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."Albert Einstein

    13. #13
      Generic lucid dreamer Seeker's Avatar
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      I am becoming a little alarmed here.
      Let me begin by saying that I have an addictive personality. In the past, I have been addicted to tobacco and quit.
      I was addicted to food and had to go on a major diet. It is still easy for me to sit down and get back into my old habits, like eating an entire pizza.
      I fear I am becoming addicted to alcohol.

      Addiction and dependance seem to be a common charactaristic of everyone here. Is there some kind of underlying effect here like a genetic predisposition? Or is LD just another means of escape from reality like drugs and alcohol?

      My question is: How many here are like me and have problems with addictions? Also, is there anyone here that doesn't have these problems?
      you must be the change you wish to see in the world...
      -gandhi

    14. #14
      Guardian Serinanth's Avatar
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      I saw a jeep that had a bumpersticker

      Fuck the Government Anarchy RULES!

      I threw a rock thrrough his window.

      I went back later..

      The cops where there... so much for anarchy.

      I think you hit an important point when you look to chemicals to change your life it is a problem.

      Alchoholism runs in my family, so I should be predisposed to have it.
      I do drink alot, but I have stopped for weeks and the thought didnt cross my mind, so I guess I am not, the same goes for weed, if I cannot get good stuff I wont smoke, end of story. I guess I just dont have an addictive personality type, im stubborn too so I guess having a strong will helps too.
      "A knight is sworn to valor.
      His heart knows only virtue.
      His blade defends the helpless.
      His might upholds the weak.
      His word speaks only truth.
      His wrath undoes the wicked."

      Impossible is only that which has yet to be imagined

    15. #15
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      ...That was pretty lame of you Seri, just to destroy something. So you could laugh at your own little inside joke... I never would picture you disrespecting somebody just for kicks. I like how everyone preaches equality, until they meet someone or see something they don't like, and then they're ready to turn around and "throw the first stone". Are you without sin, Seri? Yeah, so much for Anarchy, huh? We got fascism you can vote for here in the wonderful US of A! Hitler would be proud!

      Second... addiction is a human trait, so of course it's going to manifest itself in many of us, in many different forms. Some people are addicted to social status and power. Some people are addicted to running. Addiction isn't JUST drugs. Coffe... sugar... glutein. Food overall. I know some people that would rather die than have their musical instrument taken away from them. Sometimes these "addictions" can satisfy our needs for surrogate activities, but usually it's just escape, and we just keep trying to escape farther and farther into our own little world. I'd rather change the world around me and be who I WANT to be, then to be depressed because I don't feel like I'm accomplishing anything because the way our society is. Drugs are used to fulfill boredom... and that's about it. Generally, any ways. Like I said above, certain drugs have religious implications, and I think those are in a completely different category.

      Overall.... Drugs=Escape=Boredom=False hopes=Empty society

      It still always goes back to society and social responses and control.

      I didn't really mean to rant again... Damn... Seri... still can't believe that. That could've been MY jeep man, you have no idea who your screwing. What if they don't have insurance, man? You just screwed them for several hundred dollars for no reason... dude... that's lame. How would you like it if someone saw ur car and u had some "geek" sticker or something... or hell, maybe just because you were parked at Intel, so somebody thought, "Damn, geeks are lame!" and hucked a rock through your windshield. If your going to destroy something, go fuck up a cop car.
      "If seeing is believing, than we might as well be blind, because the searching leaves us faithless and the outcome undefined." - Cooter(indy punk band)

    16. #16
      bleak... nerve's Avatar
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      GESTAPO!

      I'm with SA. I couldn't see you doing something liek that either.


      Ignorant bliss is an oxymoron; but so is miserable truth.

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