Rant and Rave, Cry and Complain

**Zhaylin** · 01-16-2015 01:34 AM

Anju. Sorry your parents were and are so terrible to you. Is it possible just to cut all ties? Don't call, don't visit? You have your own place now don't you?
I know that's easier said than done. I had to move from Florida to West Virginia to get away from my folks. And they weren't bad people at all.

I get the smiling thing ALL the time. But it's always a good thing. 'It's so great to see you smiling all the time', 'You have such a positive energy'....
If only I felt as happy as I look

I know I've written about this before, but for me, smiling is an act of self preservation. I crave peace and abhor negativity/chaos. People have a hard time being mad at or acting aggressively toward "such a sweet heart" and "gentle soul". I've learned that kindness is extremely disarming. And because I fear people can "read my thoughts" through my body language or whatever, I genuinely feel kindness toward everyone I encounter (with few exceptions). All in the pursuit of avoiding chaos and negativity. heh, I sound like such a hippie.

No real rants here. I've been trying to play Minecraft

FPS is now at 4-6

but that's it. I've been watching a lot of Couchtuner and playing on my iPad. With the girls MIA these last couple of days, my bandwidth has been exceptional. And they say they don't watch a lot of shows. Fibbers.
I really do hope they're okay though. I'm going to have to call Paula. Even their FB is silent which is highly unusual. They went to hang out with a friend early yesterday for her b-day.

**Zhaylin** · 01-16-2015 10:04 AM

The girls are fine. I guess they just don't have internet at their friends house.
Miley, on the other hand, is absolutely infuriating

"Why did you go to sleep instead of reminding me to take the trash to the road."
Err... it's not my job to remind you. You want to get paid, do it. I shouldn't have to nag you to get it done.
"Well, that's not how my brain works. You have to remind me and stay on top of it."

No, you're an adult now. Figure it out. Keep a calendar, write things down, keep a to-do list.
"I wont do that. I don't see the point. I would forget where I put the notebook or calendar."
Then you wont get paid.

Which lead to a 15 minute argument on her making a ton of excuses but not doing anything about any of it

And any time I tell her I give her a place to live, utilities, internet etc, she quickly says: "You don't, your husband does."

No, my husband said he would take care of me not me and my grown-ass children who refuse to work or do anything and can't even be bothered to try to keep a CALENDAR.

Grrr.....

**EDIT**
It's very quiet here. Hope that means life is well for everyone.

My newest rant is simple frustration. The kids do nothing around the house so my oldest son suggested 1) threaten to kick everyone out unless they clean

Well, that's not going to happen. No parent wants their kids to be homeless.
2) Get rid of their internet.
Okay. But how. Password protect the router.

Okay. But how.

I looked at a Wiki How and it looks so complicated.
I'll have to do some more searching when my brain is more awake...

**acatalephobic** · 01-17-2015 08:22 AM

One of my worst pet peeves is when a person argues using complete bullshit as if it were factual evidence in their favor.

Always so damn convinced of the shit, too. They try to flip the script and make it seem as though it's SO unreasonable for me to bring little tiny things like reality and facts into the conversation.

Spoiler for how i really feel:

Children? Fine. You get a pass. For now.
Grown adults that are older than me? Get real.

Nobody got time for that.

EDIT: On the upside though.

Spoiler for there is hope:

Despite all the crazy, the world has some good left in it.
I say enjoy it when and wherever possible.

**Zhaylin** · 01-17-2015 08:47 AM

I think I know how you feel. Miley is THE worst at doing stuff like that.
I love my kid to death and would do anything in my power to make her life easier but *pulls out hair* Sometimes just her presence makes my blood pressure spike through the roof because I KNOW she's going to go off on a tangent about something.
She has always been the one to push my buttons though. Just doesn't know how to drop a subject

After MUCH irritation and

I FINALLY found my router and changed everything. The thing that friggin annoys me most is that I have to put in a passphrase and then the computer generates a long ass password that I will NEVER in a million years remember.
I connected to my iPad and realized, "That password sucks TOO much. Let me change to the 64bit one."

Now my iPad doesn't connect to it. At all. Until I gave up and switched it back.
What's wrong with letting me assign my own friggin password?

But, the problem with the kids will be helped for now. Tomorrow, when the headache starts, talk to me again

**EDIT**
Gah! That was a hassle. But I think I solved my problem... sort of. I have an SSID set up for each of the kids (one for the lovebirds) and a new one for myself. Then I set up one for the entire family.
Each of them have a unique password. BUT, I have to manually switch it each time I change from one kid to the other. It doesn't store the multiple logins for me to just turn on and off.
Hopefully, they'll learn to work together for a change and I can keep it on "Family".
THANKFULLY, the same password is generated between changes. If Cookies (or whatever remembers what I've previously typed) are dumped, I have the original passphrases written down.

Paula came back earlier asking if they were banned forever from the internet (they were automatically kicked off once I started messing around). I told her they are until people either get a job or start contributing around the house. She understood. Which is more than I can say for my crew when they wake up and are bored senseless

Hubby called at 3AM asking why I was still awake. I explained everything and he said he was impressed with me

I usually rely on him to take care of all the technical stuff. But I figured it out on my own *so proud of myself*

**Linkzelda** · 01-17-2015 07:25 PM

Originally Posted by acatalephobic

Spoiler for there is hope:

Spoiler for .:

**sefalik** · 01-17-2015 09:08 PM

Do some people make a fuss about getting carded? If I pick up some beer at the grocery store, they can't even ring up the item with scanning my ID. So I just always have it in-hand when I get to the cashier. I get more annoyed when they don't ask. The nearby beer distributor and the state-run liquor store never ask for ID, and I know I don't look over 30. So I always get my ID out for nothing.

**Linkzelda** · 01-17-2015 09:25 PM

Originally Posted by sefalik

Do some people make a fuss about getting carded? If I pick up some beer at the grocery store, they can't even ring up the item with scanning my ID. So I just always have it in-hand when I get to the cashier. I get more annoyed when they don't ask. The nearby beer distributor and the state-run liquor store never ask for ID, and I know I don't look over 30. So I always get my ID out for nothing.

Yeah, dude. I recall a customer saying,

"Honey, I'm clearly over twentee oneee years of aggggge."

Or,

"Did you really just ask for my ID?"

Then there's the older ones that try to joke around and go, "Aren't you going to ask me for my I.D.? Am I too old for you to ask?"

And if there's a young group around, and one of them hands over the I.D., they start seeing that I'm being serious in looking for his D.O.B. and they all scream, "Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake. Haaahaaaa" And when I ask for all of their I.D., they all panic for a bit, especially ones that do group buys, and forget they have to show the I.D. if they're going to do that for alcohol and such. I remember one guy close at midnight a few months ago getting one of his friends to buy some alcohol while he tries to get some cigarettes. I ask him for his I.D., he starts moving his hands to the contours of his bodies, starts panicking, and tries to play the nice guy disposition and ask, "Come on man, don't I look over 18?

"

After he continues to sweat a bit, I'm already prepared to say that I'm not going to sell it to him unless he has his I.D. And I also have the ones where the boyfriend uses his girlfriend's body in thinking I'll react to that, and give her a free pass. I literally heard him say to his partner, "You're a sex machine!" But she was clearly over 30, so I don't know why they needed to feel they were at danger of not having their I.D. The reactivity levels and subjective nature of people express just to get some alcohol is astounding.

**TwoCrystalCups** · 01-17-2015 10:52 PM

Originally Posted by sefalik

Do some people make a fuss about getting carded? If I pick up some beer at the grocery store, they can't even ring up the item with scanning my ID. So I just always have it in-hand when I get to the cashier. I get more annoyed when they don't ask. The nearby beer distributor and the state-run liquor store never ask for ID, and I know I don't look over 30. So I always get my ID out for nothing.

And when you don't have it "in-hand" they will ask about it. LOL

**tropicalbreeze** · 01-18-2015 12:38 AM

Do some people make a fuss about getting carded?

yep. for me its a little different. i work at a bank so i have to ask for ID regardless of age if the person isn't known. i get the same excuse: " i've had an account here for over 20yrs already." i'm like: "well, i've never seen you here before." i get the feeling that some people are just looking for something to complain about. its usually the older people from my experience.

**Zhaylin** · 01-18-2015 01:33 AM

I'm 40 years old. I LOVE getting carded

It still happens if I'm buying beer for Paula. She's of legal age, but because she went in for beer once with my daughter who is not of age they refuse to sell to her now. Which is kind of annoying. Paula likes her beer. Destinee, not so much. Plus, Destinee has some weird liver issues so neither Paula nor I "let" her drink. But the store owner doesn't know that, so I understand... even if it is a bit irking.

The exception with Destinee is special events. Maybe y'all know something about this. They were with a friend for her birthday and they picked up some Peach Smirnoff. Destinee drank just a little and broke out in massive hives (they took pictures and showed me). Paula didn't let her have any more of the Smirnoff. But later that day they had some rum or something. Destinee had a little and didn't react at all. My daughter has had beer in the past and other than feeling flushed and slightly red-faced, she had no serious reaction. Isn't Malt the same thing that's in, say Bud Light? Why would she react so strongly to one and not the other unless maybe it's a combination of the malt and the sweetener?

My rant is sickness. I'm afraid I'm getting a "flu". I don't understand sickness. People say there's no such thing as a stomach bug. But what about feeling nauseous and vomiting? the "flu" is more influenza related, right? What about contagious nausea etc? In any case, I'm running a slight fever and feel like I'm going through menopause. One minute I'm burning up, the next I'm chilling. I thought my eye was going to do its weird bouncy thing earlier because I felt so floogally. I ate an Asiago chicken Club and the nausea subsided a great deal. I also took some Tylenol. But I still feel yucky.
So, I'm heading back to bed.
Hopefully, I'll have better dreams than I did earlier today!!!

Oh yeah... so far, the internet hijacking has worked great. Miley isn't happy, of course, but the girls did an outstanding job. Or rather, Paula did. I TOLD her to make sure Destinee did some of the work, but she was left cleaning their bedroom only. Paula did the kitchen and the walkway through the Master bedroom.
Miley put 3 trashbags into the trashcans

**EDIT**
NOROVIRUS. http://www.health.com/health/gallery...8435_3,00.html I need to remember this. I vaguely recall going through this confusion months ago

**Ginsan** · 01-18-2015 03:02 AM

I've got no friends, no social interaction and I am bored to death, I am just 20 years old but feel like I'm 40 at least!

**Rozollo** · 01-18-2015 05:21 PM

I blacked out last night before bed time. It really upsets me because I had a solid Buzz all night, didn't drink too much I thought, but I guess I did. Hopefully, I didn't make an ass out of myself.

**Ginsan** · 01-18-2015 05:55 PM

I feel like I'm the only one in this thread with real troubles and realizing my hypocricy makes me feel stupid on top of sad and seeing this multi-layered self reflection allows me to laugh at my situation which in turn makes me feel even more stupid and on and on. Are these schizofrenic tendencies?

**Ginsan** · 01-18-2015 05:55 PM

lol

**TheUncanny** · 01-18-2015 06:41 PM

I have a north-facing backyard that's almost always engulfed by the shade of my house. As such, when it snows it doesn't thaw back there for weeks and sometimes months at a time...meaning 95% of the shit from my two dogs get embedded in the ice and cannot be picked up. And so the piles continue to accumulate week after week after week until one day it does thaw, and I literally have 50lbs of soggy dog shit to try to pick up before it snows again.

**Zhaylin** · 01-18-2015 08:33 PM

lol, Uncanny. It's only funny because I know EXACTLY what you mean

Ginsan, Tiresias.

Ginsan,social life? Don't you know that's what DV's for

But, nah, my kids are the same way. They never leave the house, though, so I ask them how they expect to have a social life if they're never around people. If you crave people, you have to go to where they are. Join a club, a church, look up things in your area. We live in the middle of nowhere but there's still stuff my kids could do if they really wanted to. Hang out at the mall (not one here though) or the park if nothing else.
Thankfully, on-line is all the social life I need.

I also know what you mean about having real problems, feeling like a hypocrit, laughing at yourself. When I was young I was especially bad about feeling guilty about everything... 'well, sure, I have the flu, or the hurricane knocked out power for a week, or my grandma died, or........ but what are you whining about? At least you're alive and better off than most people!!!!"
Everyone deals with the problems they have. It's nice to have a wider view and to keep things in perspective, but even little stresses add up.
And it's never a bad thing to laugh at yourself

Schizophrenic? Nah. Just figuring stuff out like the rest of us.

I'm feeling less nauseous today, which is a rave. But I still have this pain in my neck. It hurts turning my head to look for traffic while driving.
It's either body aches from this illness; I slept wrong, or I have "text neck" from playing on my iPad for too long.
I was in so much pain earlier that I had to take a hot shower and then went back to bed.
I'm HIGHLY fatigued.

But, since waking up this last time, and eating another Asiago chicken club, I'm feeling much better.
I still think I'm going to go back to bed though

**Ginsan** · 01-18-2015 09:14 PM

Zhaylin if being bored is the only thing I occasionally complain about then it means my life is pretty damn good! = D In fact, I even feel sorry for a large portion of the population because they go through their lives without expieriencing the joy of good music. For example Beethoven's 5th or 7th symphony, his triple concerto or Mozart's 40th symphony, if I didn't have those my life would lose at least 70% of its color!
Listen to a few minutes and tell me what you think. It's conducted by the most beloved conductur in the last 100 years

Btw, what is it like to have kids? I've always thought that your life is pretty much over and all your effort goes to your kids but then your kids feel smothered by all your efforts and just want to be carefree and find you annoying. Is that about right?

And TheUncanny that's the funniest thing I've heard in at least a week

EDIT: perhaps the reason I don't have a social life is that I don't really care too much about it

EDIT2: I remember last week when I blasted this piece out of my cd player with the window wide open (my room often stinks), I bet everybody within a 50 meter radius of our front door was hearing it xD I hope they enjoyed it

**acatalephobic** · 01-18-2015 09:29 PM

I laughed so hard...
TOO hard, maybe.
But, not entirely accurate.
It actually went down like this...

Spoiler for not as funny as the drawing, though:

Unfortunately I get the added INconvenience of company policy that expects carding of those appearing 40 or younger...that is, unless you've seen theirs before/grey area/blahblahblah.

So the law requires one thing, but the particular store a person drives to also has their own (often more stringent) policies. Yes it makes no sense, but complaining to cashiers will do NOTHING to change how stupid the policy is so why even bother. So every time I ask someone I've never seen before I'm usually wildly off in age, so they are either (occasionally) ecstatic about it, or usually furious (for reasons I simply cannot understand).

Originally Posted by sefalik

Do some people make a fuss about getting carded? If I pick up some beer at the grocery store, they can't even ring up the item with scanning my ID. So I just always have it in-hand when I get to the cashier. I get more annoyed when they don't ask. The nearby beer distributor and the state-run liquor store never ask for ID, and I know I don't look over 30. So I always get my ID out for nothing.

In my state a person is required to have it to drive, so when they drive to a store only to buy alcohol/tobacco products, I'm not really sympathetic. But they act like I'm doing them some sort of injustice by doing my job. These measures not only prevent underage sales, but also protect people like me that are working this kind of job. People who never have don't understand the consequences of doing it wrong even one single time (huge).

Although we don't enforce the every-purchase rule, many places have simply because it makes more damn sense than expecting an employee to guess at a complete strangers age and hope for the best.

I don't care WHO you are, you ain't fuckin with my job.
For a single cigar or a damn forty, really? Fuck off with that.

They say something like...
"#<%$& I've never heard of that what a £℅€®ing >.&$+#!"

Or...
"Are you $%&#!ing serious?! I GUESS I'll go back out to my car and get it." +overdramatic sigh of disgust

Yeah you will!
Why did you even leave it out there to begin with?
I didn't create extra work for you here, you did that on your own!

Honestly, I just wish they wouldn't take it so damn personal all the time.
This is my job man, has nothing to do with you personally this is just what I'm PAID to DO.
I am NOT paid to guess your age, I AM paid to VERIFY it through means of a valid ID.

Surely that's not a difficult thing to grasp, why you gotta treat me like I just offended your families honour or some shit? Why are these people so damn offended about looking youthful, it's nuts!

Spoiler for side story:

**Ginsan** · 01-19-2015 12:21 AM

If I was 25+ years old, getting carded would definitely make my day! Anyone who isn't young anymore seems to miss it so people who get mad at it are probably just angry and looking for a way to get rid it.

**sefalik** · 01-19-2015 02:24 PM

Wow. I never knew it was that big of a deal. I mean, don't these people just keep the ID in their wallet? As in, the wallet that's already opened so that they can pay? I guess this just goes to show I would never survive working as a cashier.

Speaking of stores, I was supposed to stop at the store on the way home from work to pick up two things I forgot to pick up when I did my grocery shopping the other night. But then I forgot to stop on the way home. On the plus side, if go now I can get beer too (they don't sell beer until 8am). I bought a case of a chocolate beer the other day, and it's really chocolaty... but it's meh. Sounded/looked good, but meh. So now I have a case of meh.

**Anju** · 01-19-2015 06:50 PM

My sister's wedding got cancelled. She wasn't willing anyway and finally the guy backed out. But then her psychiatrist asked her to go to an astrologer. That's not the kind of advice u expect from an educated person. And she actually went to an astrologer who uses dowsing rods and shit like that. And he says she has the influence of a gandharva.

This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. But people who believe in god, will believe all kinds of bullshit as well. So they’re going to some temples and churches and doing stuff. Am I the only one who understands that it's just a way to brainwash and make her believe that it is abnormal to not want marriage?

Now she wants me to go stay with them for a few days and I don't want to see my parents. I told her I can meet her separately but she seems to think we are being unfair/selfish by not wanting the parents around. I told her exactly what I think about the parents and she says "Though they have done all that to you, the treatment got you out of depression, right? you have to meet them so they don't feel bad". Why has everyone stopped thinking logically. I'm not going to meet anyone. Fuck that shit.

**Zoth** · 01-19-2015 07:15 PM

^

Wow Anju. You'd think that psychiatrists, way more than psychologists, would stick around evidence-based practices: telling a patient to seek help in astrology is just unprofessional...I'd get it if your sister was the one suggesting it and the psychiatrist would be like "sure, why not?" but the other way around? Wow...

**acatalephobic** · 01-19-2015 11:19 PM

Originally Posted by Anju

I told her I can meet her separately but she seems to think we are being unfair/selfish by not wanting the parents around. I told her exactly what I think about the parents and she says "Though they have done all that to you, the treatment got you out of depression, right? you have to meet them so they don't feel bad". Why has everyone stopped thinking logically. I'm not going to meet anyone. Fuck that shit.

Don't mean to butt into your business here, but what your sister said regarding you and your parents makes no sense at all, clearly you can see that. Even if your depression has improved, the source of that pain will always be an emotional thing to deal with.

Anyone expecting you to make believe everything is dandy (for their sake) is NOT seeing how damaging that can be to you, AND to the progress you've made in overcoming your depression. Especially if the only reason for pretending is "so they don't feel bad". Fuck that shit, just like you said yourself.

You can't avoid them forever of course, but if you aren't ready to invite them back into your life on YOUR terms then I don't see any reason why people (especially those that care about you) would be unwilling to respect that.

As for thinking illogically?
A part of me has given up on the idea that the majority of people think logically.
Maybe they can when everything is ideal, but when is it ever, really?

As soon as emotions and desires get involved, people like to lose their damn mind. They can't see it at the time, usually...the emotions cloud their judgment so well that they think they are actually using their better judgment.

A less emotional yet useful everyday type example:

Originally Posted by sefalik

I mean, don't these people just keep the ID in their wallet? As in, the wallet that's already opened so that they can pay?

Seems pretty damn obvious to me as well, and yet it is simply easier for these people to get an attitude with me than it is to admit that THEY did something that makes no sense whatsoever.

The laws, policies, common sense and decency, these things are all meaningless in the face of a person who is seemingly MORE content being angry at the world for no apparent reason. The young ones I worry the most for because I think damn if you're this bitter already, just think how sour your attitude will be a few decades from now..

**TwoCrystalCups** · 01-20-2015 12:25 AM

Starting to go back into meditating again, i realize my clairvoyance, clairaudience, telepathy and such gets better once i do. Dreams become more clearer and obvious to interpret, nothing foggy.
Oh btw, I don't make this shit up. I still have these going on, been having it for the longest time. Dreams start showing me words, and sometimes a narrator is talking and telling me how my dream is telling me things in certain ways. It's intriguing. Very much.

**Zhaylin** · 01-20-2015 07:14 AM

I HATE narrated dreams, TwoCrystalCups

Thankfully, I don't have them very often.

Excellent music, Ginsan. I used to be all about music when I was younger. I was ALWAYS singing and whistling. Yanni (sp) used to help put me in a creative mood and I did a lot of writing to his music.
But, meh, like everything else, life changes, interests shift. I now only listen to music (whatever's on the radio) when I'm driving. I've become ADHD in my old age

As for parenthood. Being a parent is the best thing in the world- but it comes with a lot of frustration, headaches and heartaches. My crew has grown up (4 kids), but 3 still live at home and well as the girlfriend of my daughter Destinee.
But I'm a lousy mom. I've never been a disciplinarian; I'm too distant and self-absorbed. I love all of them to pieces, but they definitely deserved better.

Anju. You see them when YOU'RE ready. Don't let other people guilt you into doing something you're not comfortable with. And yeah, that's an extremely strange suggestion from a p-doc. Maybe your sister is just saying he suggested it so she'll get more support? Psychiatrists are unique like everyone else, though. She might have found herself a strange bird

If it's something that might help her though, I guess it doesn't really matter. They'll probably just reaffirm what she already feels.

My rant is still high fatigue and now strange hours. But I almost always tend to keep strange hours

I managed to clean and organize a lot of my room last night. So that's a rave.
It's about the only one though. Things are BAD- they're just same 'ole same 'ole.
I did get to Smoker Friendly today and I picked up some juice. One of them's called "Garbage Punch". It mixes superbly with my vanilla/clove (which I am now out of

)
The store owner GAVE me a tank filled with juice. I was trying all of their flavors (they have sample stands) and she asked if I can use different tanks, and I said no. My coil's separate and not built in to the typical clearomizers. She told me to try something and low and behold, her tank worked with my battery. It's called "24/7 PFT 25."
I'm going to go look up info on that now....