Thread: Rant and Rave, Cry and Complain

Suena. I'm sure you did excellently
Weird about your neighbors house!

Good luck Link!!

My rant is that I am very ready to go to sleep... but I DON'T WANT TO lol. I'm sick of sleeping.
Plus, if I go to sleep I wont wake up in time to take advantage of the sunshine. I REALLY need to get a bunch of laundry done.
My dog also thinks she's starving to death, so I need to try to get money from hubby before he goes to work. I loathe bothering him before work. Cocoa has worms though (no med has been able to kill them ) so she eats a lot. So I need to buy her some more food ASAP (they ran out this evening PLUS she had left over chili).

It's Monday and it's time for school, feeling so tired. Dammit.

So many features are down right now.

Yeah. Where's my Like button lol

My rant is that I slept all friggin day. I couldn't crash until after 7AM. I've not had true insomnia in a VERY long time. But my brain was in overdrive even though I was sleepy as hell.
Hubby's being difficult so I have $150. to live on for 2 weeks. It would normally be $400. It annoys the heck out of me that he can spend tens of thousands of dollars on art glass but grumbles about giving me money. I know he sees the glass as an investment and giving money to me is the same as flushing it down the toilet, but it still friggin annoys me.
I'm going to have my son FINALLY gather the cans hubby's been after him to pick up and take them in to be recycled. We have about 5 yard [trash] bags filled with cans. That might be enough for some smokes.

And I'm going to try to find Meesha a new home. Dog is impossible to house train. Even when the front door is wide open, she'll crap in the livingroom instead I just don't have the energy to deal with her.

It's going to be an interesting couple of weeks...

My throat all of a sudden feels like it was dragged across concrete.

It never occurred to me until just a little while ago that thanksgiving is really a pretty lonely holiday when all of your friends are out of town and the rest of your family is either dead or thousands of miles away.

Feel better soon Dave!! Are you sick or have you been loud?

My rant is that my empathy is ridiculous.
I went to the Dollar Tree then to Sheetz. I was okay. Then I made myself go to Walmart even though there were more people than I like to be around.
As I went to the aisle to get dog food I saw a little boy looking a little panicked so I asked him if he was lost. He nodded and said he was looking for his parents. So I pointed to a worker and told him I would take him to her and she would help him.
I glanced at her name tag and approached her on a more personal level and she jumped right into action. She even stooped down so she'd be more his level.
As soon as I left them I felt like crying. What the heck lol. The boys fear and sadness radiated off of him and I devoured it apparently. That's why I friggin hate being around people. There's just too many flipping emotions and it overwhelms me because I tend to feel them. And when there's conflicting emotions, dear God (like anger vs sadness or fear between people), I just want to run.

I saw him later with his parents. I waved and he brightened up once he placed me lol. Even though there was an uneventful/happy outcome, I'm still emotionally drained. I just want to go back to sleep now...

Ugh... my post disappeared.

Nope... there it is

*grumble/grumble* weird forum glitches...

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Ugh... my post disappeared.

Nope... there it is

*grumble/grumble* weird forum glitches...

How is it that since the admins started working on fixing the glitches, more have shown up?

Originally Posted by SnowyCat

It never occurred to me until just a little while ago that thanksgiving is really a pretty lonely holiday when all of your friends are out of town and the rest of your family is either dead or thousands of miles away.

It can also be a lonely holiday when you don't celebrate it. Same with Christmas when you're in a Jewish family and soo many people assume you're from a Christian family. Every year I get at least 5 "so what are your Christmas plans?" I Have to either lie, or tell them I don't celebrate Christmas my family is Jewish, and that's always awkward and makes the other person feel bad for asking. Usually if the question is broad enough I'll jut say "nothing much."

The thing I like about this time of year is Starbucks's Caramel Brule Latte. Expensive but is the best thing I've ever tasted.

I listened to a lucid dreaming hypnosis video last night, didn't get a lucid dream but experienced an intense audio hallucination. Aside from that I remembered so many dreams, probably about 1.5 hours worth together. It seemed like a ridiculous amount of dreams already and then I remembered I still had one from earlier in the night which I'd memorized after waking up which added another 20 minutes at least. Until now I've been remembering enough to write only a paragraph or two, so perhaps the hypnosis thing worked.

That's good of course, I've been trying to remember my dreams better and almost feel I had a lucid dream but don't remember. I haven't been this close to having them in over a year. I should be happy and I am about that. But right now my priority is to wake up early and get things done. I planned to wake up at noon today, but was awake during the entire hypnosis video last night and ended up sleeping at like 6am. I woke up at 12, but went back to sleep for about two hours, using the excuse that I need to think about these dreams and not move or I'll forget them. But I ended up falling back asleep and having even more dreams. When I finally woke up at 2pm or so, I started writing down my dreams, which isn't even half accomplished, realized I needed to get other things done today, decided to leave my room.... but oh wait I just want to check DV first. And that was about 30 minutes ago. Now it's like 3:16pm. I want to wake up earlier so badly but something like this always happens.

Every post I can't like makes me die a little bit inside.

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

My rant is that my empathy is ridiculous.
I went to the Dollar Tree then to Sheetz. I was okay. Then I made myself go to Walmart even though there were more people than I like to be around.
As I went to the aisle to get dog food I saw a little boy looking a little panicked so I asked him if he was lost. He nodded and said he was looking for his parents. So I pointed to a worker and told him I would take him to her and she would help him.
I glanced at her name tag and approached her on a more personal level and she jumped right into action. She even stooped down so she'd be more his level.
As soon as I left them I felt like crying. What the heck lol. The boys fear and sadness radiated off of him and I devoured it apparently. That's why I friggin hate being around people. There's just too many flipping emotions and it overwhelms me because I tend to feel them. And when there's conflicting emotions, dear God (like anger vs sadness or fear between people), I just want to run.

I saw him later with his parents. I waved and he brightened up once he placed me lol. Even though there was an uneventful/happy outcome, I'm still emotionally drained. I just want to go back to sleep now...

Aww, Zhay. You should relax if it's sucked that much energy out of you, you did your part well so you deserve it.

Originally Posted by Dianeva

It can also be a lonely holiday when you don't celebrate it. Same with Christmas when you're in a Jewish family and soo many people assume you're from a Christian family. Every year I get at least 5 "so what are your Christmas plans?" I Have to either lie, or tell them I don't celebrate Christmas my family is Jewish, and that's always awkward and makes the other person feel bad for asking. Usually if the question is broad enough I'll jut say "nothing much."

A few months ago some friends and I made plans to celebrate Hanukkah this year. I need to make sure they live up to that, lazy bastards probably won't put in the effort if I don't do something to make sure it happens (says the laziest person in the group). >.>

Originally Posted by Dianeva

I listened to a lucid dreaming hypnosis video last night, didn't get a lucid dream but experienced an intense audio hallucination. Aside from that I remembered so many dreams, probably about 1.5 hours worth together. It seemed like a ridiculous amount of dreams already and then I remembered I still had one from earlier in the night which I'd memorized after waking up which added another 20 minutes at least. Until now I've been remembering enough to write only a paragraph or two, so perhaps the hypnosis thing worked.

Iiiiinteresting. What video was it?

I miss the 'likes' also.

Somehow, Freenode just dosn't feel the same.

Originally Posted by melanieb

I miss the 'likes' also.

Somehow, Freenode just dosn't feel the same.

It doesn't... and Irken is scary.

Thanks, Zhaylin. I think its some sort of sickness, I've been coughing every now and then too. I might see if I can find some cough medicine that doesn't turn me into a zombie like NyQuil.

I also miss the DJ feature and the "who quoted me" feature. I'm sure they'll be back soon, no doubt our techs are working hard. Also, a big "F.U."to the dingbat who felt the need to be a punk.

Originally Posted by SnowyCat

It doesn't... and Irken is scary.

^

Originally Posted by SnowyCat

It doesn't... and Irken is scary.

At least you know he'll never see this.


I had something like 2500 notifications before this mess....now I have 2. It's so weird.

I feel like a horrible person... I realized that I've been leading one of my female friends on for a while, even though to me it just felt like friendship. THE TABLES HAVE TURNED and now I'm the one wanting to just be friends. This is awful...

Originally Posted by Alyzarin

Iiiiinteresting. What video was it?

This. The voice is kind of weird and annoying at first but becomes less so after a while, really got into my head.

Originally Posted by ThePreserver

I feel like a horrible person... I realized that I've been leading one of my female friends on for a while, even though to me it just felt like friendship. THE TABLES HAVE TURNED and now I'm the one wanting to just be friends. This is awful...

I've been in the same situation. Twice actually, arguably thrice, and have been on the opposite side too, all within the last year (ugh that makes me sound terrible). It's hard because you can't even feel sorry for yourself since you aren't the victim, even if you know you didn't have bad intentions. The best thing to do for me was to make it clear to the person that I wasn't interested in them as soon as possible, and they may or may not be willing to remain friends.

Going to have to home school myself for the second day in a row due to car issues. I really hope I can teach myself this neurobiology stuff.

Originally Posted by melanieb

At least you know he'll never see this.


I had something like 2500 notifications before this mess....now I have 2. It's so weird.

Probably due to the temporary block of the like system.

I need to wake up earlier tomorrow, by 12, but I'm so hyper now because I've spent the last 5 hours or so editing videos of drunken l4d2 games I've started putting up on youtube. For some reason I'm finding the editing really fun, just watching it and clipping out parts that aren't entertaining. It's almost funner than actually playing the game. Now it's 3:30am and I can't imagine being tired anytime soon, meaning I'm going to end up sleeping in or getting like no sleep.

Spoiler for one of the videos:

This is rather embarrassing because I was drunk and for some reason put on that dumb blonde persona, but in case anyone wants to hear my voice (HD full screen is best):

hehe, Dianeva. Nice voice And the game looked fun. I don't think I've ever played any of the Left for Dead games.

My rant is that I couldn't make myself stay awake last night, so I took a caffeine pill and went to bed at 1:30AM with one of my 3 lights left on I woke at 8:30 instead of some time after noon, so that's an improvement lol

Originally Posted by melanieb

I had something like 2500 notifications before this mess....now I have 2. It's so weird.

O_O I think the most notifications I've had waiting for me simultaneously was ... like 5.

My rant is that things always come at the most inopportune times. I think the way weed effects me is changing too, because lately whenever I smoke a more energetic strain I've been getting to a point where I'm just surging with energy and a bit psychotic, I'll be moving around and acting like I'm on a lot of coke or speed. I should've had that in mind last night because I'd been smoking this new stuff I got during the day and I had gotten to a point where I literally couldn't stop walking and my mind was starting to create repeating form constants out of anything I imagined. That was from just taking one small to moderate hit every now and then.

Later at night I was seeing an old high school friend for the first time in a few months and we were at my house watching one of the recent South Park episodes and taking huge bong rips of that same stuff. Within a couple minutes after stopping everything in the room kind of rolled and zoomed in for a second, it was fairly disorienting. This wasn't a "wow, that was a weird perceptual blip" type of thing, it was one of those "alright, that's just not supposed to happen" moments. I tried keeping my mind on watching the episode, but everything on the TV started looking extremely alien and became hard to comprehend. I looked down at my arm and noticed that I was now getting very intense tunnel vision, everywhere I looked would twist and warp along with white tendrils of light and my depth perception was completely nonexistent. Everything except exactly what I was looking at would immediately start fading out of existence until I redirected my attention, and then it would repeat. And lastly, my body was starting shake very uncontrollably. I've had that happen before when smoking too much, but this was beyond any of that... I felt like I was being locked into very uncomfortable positions or approaching some sort of convulsions, and my heart was beating hard and fast and my hands were completely drenched in cold sweat. I was officially entering the realm of things that you would normally only expect to happen from eating way too many brownies. We only smoked like one good-sized bowl between the two of us, maybe a little bit less. ._.

I got up and went to the bathroom because I felt like I might be able to get past it all if I was able to make myself throw up, but to no avail. It's a bummer because it really would've helped, burping or vomiting always helps me get past heavy cannabinoid stuff, but I ended up not even burping for a really long time afterward, after I had already calmed down. When I was in the bathroom I noticed that every few seconds my memory of the previous few seconds would seem like it had happened in another world or another life, and moving my body no longer created any feeling or sensations of movement, nor did it look different from anything else in my line of sight. It was all merged into one solid visual stream that I wasn't even a part of anymore. At this point I'm basically thinking "You've got to be fucking kidding me.", and that I have two options: I can either try to accept what's going on even though I was in a very uncomfortable set and setting for it and probably have to wander through an extended period of psychotic egoless dissociation, or I can remember that I'm supposed to be driving my friend back to his apartment in like twenty minutes. ;-; Of course I have to responsible, so I ended up taking a niacin and a couple of my dad's Libriums (anti-anxiety pills) and had him check my vitals just to ease my mind since I was going to have to fight it off, which generally keeps that kind of experience sort of scattered and anxious. However, it didn't take long for them to kick in and soon it was just a normal high again, albeit an extremely strong one. I felt like I was brand new to weed again, I haven't been high like that in years. We even tried turning up the radio on the drive back and at a low volume it sounded almost overwhelmingly loud. >.>

Anyway, that was pretty intense but I really wish it wouldn't have happened at a time that I was catching up with an old friend and had responsibilities to attend to. I guess I need to start being a bit more careful with how much I smoke these days too, I'm definitely one of the people who gets some sort of reverse tolerance effect with THC so I should probably back off a little bit for now. Either that or lock myself in a pitch black room and smoke a blunt.

Nah, probably not in my best interest lol. For now.

*sigh*

Not too bad so far today though, it is a nice strain.

Originally Posted by Dianeva

This. The voice is kind of weird and annoying at first but becomes less so after a while, really got into my head.

Cool, I'll have to check it out! Thanks.

Aly Sounds horrible! I hope you're doing much better now!!

My rant is that I ended up going back to sleep. What the heck lol. I slept for 2 more hours and then my son came into my room, sat at the computer to check one of his games and he smoked one of my cigarettes I was awake and talking to him, about to get up because I had to drive him to fill out an application. But as soon as he left I fell right back to sleep. Not only that, I started dreaming immediately. I woke because I "grrrrr-ed" rofl. I dreamed Meesha was chewing on something and when I took the item from her, I saw it was my necklace.

And yeah... I actually grrr in real life Only, it tends to sound more like "erg".

It's very cloudy outside but the clouds are cool and wispy.

Anti-rant: My son has an interview on Friday Hopefully, he'll get the job.

I only ate 3 bananas today in one go, skipped breakfast, and that was my lunch. I honestly don't want to go over for Thanksgiving holiday, because I have Exam 4 for science next Thursday, then the week after that, the final on Friday on "dead week" that's normally used for studying for exams.

I honestly don't see the need to go 90 minuets to get to my home city, when I could use 90 minutes preparing a final exam review for myself.

Also, I'm this close from being pissed off on people who focus on something so insignificant, magnify it to make it look like it's a detriment to the internet as whole, when the internet is a clusterfuck of bullshit in the first place....and for you to be so fixated on me supposedly posting nonsense....you make it look like I do that for on-topic sections.

Lol. I swear, I even let them act high and mighty.

Also, IRC, it's amazing that if I want to call someone out, it would be flaming, but if they're posting how much I'm shit, and how they're high and mighty, that they're the only intelligent beings, that I'm the totality of all idiots.....I can see how this is how they get their kicks.

Because their lives certainly are so boring for them to just insult me. What's worse, I actually like the insults, because it's so easy to analyze them more, they're so vulnerable. I wonder when I'll reach my breaking point, and just start drawing their faces cut off from their bodies, and keep it in my secret collection.

This close....THIS CLOSE from doing that. I swear, fucking drug asses. Placing stereotypes, setting them as irrefutable, whining over who's over at their channel like little babies. Omg, you kicked me!

Oh no, I'm going to die!

You are almighty, you sir, clearly have shown you are the most ballsy person on the internet. Look at you! Type "/kick," sigh of relief...feels good doesn't it?

Sacks of shit. <3 you IRC. It should be interesting if any idiots are going to end up growing up there for once. Like seriously, you're just insulting me, you have hatred for me, why not express it more. Am I the one who has to come up with how much you really thing I'm annoying to you? LOL.

I swear, I enjoy fantasizing death for both sides too much.

It was getting good when one interference was out of the way permanently. But that's just what I think.

Anti-rant:

Only one more class, one set of homework, and tomorrow, one class only, then pack my bags head for the short holiday.

--

I somewhat feel bad for being the person to insult. But that's what happens when people place "tard tard tard tard tard tard" on you constantly.

Oh well, I can only fantasize them being killed numerous of ways, and if there's one thing my mind actually does for me perfectly, it's that.

<33

Lol, the banana part seems to decorate this whole rant with cuteness.