I am starting to wonder after reading many of these posts if I am just dreaming or if something else is going on? Lately this has been really eating at me. I have been lucid dreaming since probably 3 years old when I saw a Lion staring at me through my window and after being afraid of it for a couple of weeks and my parents coming in and telling me nothing was there I became friends with it. I did this with many nightmares where I became friends with my fears. Even the big gorilla looking one that ate my friends and spit out their bones. Eventually he became my friend and carried me on his shoulder everywhere. I was so painfully shy as a child that I really LIVED in my dreams. I enjoyed going to sleep and eventually what I call the VOICE was teaching me about life, making me think about my decisions, and was so calming and smart and I made friends with the voice as well. The VOICE is the constant who has been with me all of my life. I always thought of the VOICE as my teacher. I cannot tell you how many time I was given solutions that I myself would never have thought of. This VOICE is far more intelligent than myself. I never thought of it to be me? But after seeing someone mention your higher self, could this be what I have been learning from all my life? I feel it is a man, yet I don't see it. It is very comforting yet I never mentioned it to anyone for fear they would think I was crazy. When I am going to sleep I hear my name being called from a far distance and it appears to come from my left. I often have visions when I am trying to fall asleep and even my husband laughs at me when I tell him what I see. Just normal people doing normal things quite often.
I have never trained for lucidity, never read about anything to do with psychics or any of that. I am not very religious because I question everything. As of this past year I feel I am supposed to be doing something and someone is trying to send me a message but I don't know what it is. If anyone is familiar with this, or how I should handle this being a newcomer who appears to be doing many of the things you all TRY to do without even meaning to do if that makes sense? I feel I was given a gift and I am wasting it. At least I know there are words for these things now so maybe I am not that crazy.