I haven't logged onto this site for so long! Anyway last time I was here the question "was this a lucid dream," (you should know why this is silly,) was asked a lot and there was a lot of confusion and misunderstanding which I decided was probably just young people. Anyway here's hoping stuff changed and that someone can relate to this or give some insight.

I haven't put much thought into LDing lately, but with summer coming I want to go hard at it, and hopefully I can have at least one lucid experience. In the past though whenever I would start logging dreams my recall would increase greatly and I would remember such unique, surreal, amazing dreams. My dreams were great memories and had some beautiful atmospheres or scenes, so much so that the fact that I wasn't becoming lucid didn't bother me. I did have one though. It only lasted long enough for me to run from the front of my house to the back, but it was so bright and so real, and cut short due to excitement. I would love to have an experience like that lasts a bit longer... The possibilities!!!

But a weird phenomena always happened when I was in that 'hunt mode' for lucid dreams. I'd always be on the verge, the very edge of lucidity. A very often occurrence in my dreams was me saying things to myself like "i'm dreaming," "i'm lucid," "i know i'm dreaming." But it wasn't a fully lucid dream, I wasn't "awake" in my dreams. I don't know if my mind was teasing me or if I actually was partially conscious but I feel like I made a wrong turn over and over, I did the reality checks right but didn't use them to wake myself up. I think once I get my recall up again I may try FILD or something simpler to just get lucid once more. But DILDing let to some confusion and torment in these weird dreams. Still though, dreams mane. Shits nice.