I Gave Up

[jardoss]

Maybe four months ago I was all hooked on this idea to be awake a 100% within a dream. To be able to live your dream, while being asleep, and wake up, like as if nothing happened. To have some sort of second life every night. Just for a few minutes. And I can almost swear that I was lucid some times. Like, maybe 5 times. But they were damn short. But then I got a mail from this forum, who asked If I had forgotten about them? The problem is: When you're not getting anywhere, when you're not getting enough results, you kinda let go? You give up? That's what happened to me. I still LOVE the idea. But, I just can't get myself back to where I was. I don't even know if this is real or not. I mean, everytime I went lucid (or, think I was lucid), I wasn't a 100% clear in mind. There was a bit... Fuzzyness, if you will. I'm not quite sure what I'm asking. Frankly, I don't even know why I'm writing this here. But, you know, the dream of a dream being real, is just... Amazing, to me.