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This chick with her husband talks to me about wine and in all that wine talk i'm SUPPOSED!!! to know she likes me, and wants me to ask her out. All i am like is "yeah wine is good mm hmm". She gives me the "ugh you're useless" look. Her husband is smiling and laughing.
Heres another from me:The DC's are banded together in some off-world location.
"WE'RE NOT YOUR TOYS!!!",one person says.That made me think,the next day..
Am I just using dreams for my playground?...Yes,indeedy,I suppose I am!
I haven't been here for a while, but I had a lucid this morning and thought I'd catch up.
So this one's from some time ago, and it's one of the most intelligent (non-lucid) dreams I've had.
I'm looking at my back yard, my father's standing besides me. I see two cats fighting, a black one and a white one. The white cat moves rather strangely. I ask my father if it's the neigbors' cat.
This is what he said: "That's no cat! Look, he's got opposable thumbs!" (This is where I notice that he's got, in fact, opposable thumbs. Though I don't realize that my father would never say something like that).
My father continues: "And of course there's the fact that he's wearing pants..."
Yes, the cat was wearing pants. Apparently it was the neighbors' 7 year old kid, Tommeke (Dutch name, he doesn't really exist), who had cat ears, a tail, and was mostly covered in white fur.
This wasn't funny as far as what was said goes but more of just what happened. So I had been reading harry potter before I fell asleep, so I had a dream that voldemort was after me... with a machine gun. And whenever I would ask for help because he was after me, they would just casually say "good luck" or "dont get blood on the carpet" or something. And I didn't stop to wonder why he wasn't using his wand. And i didn't become lucid either :roll:
I actually remember what one of my dcs said, word for word too. ^__^ The dude said..... uh oh forgot... um I asked so am I going to die he said... "When there is no creator or destroyer there are only thrills" :?
Quote:
Originally Posted by justme
that's actually a heavy dose of wisdom
This happened in a lucid like a week ago. I in my house when I suddenly appear on a train in some random city. I'm trying to get out of the train when I hear this disembodied voice.
'This dream will end in 10, 9, 8' it says and continues counting down.
'Hey, what the hell!' I shout. 'No it's not! Stop that!'
'5, 4, 3, 2,' it counts. The dream begins to fade and I scream:
"I hate you!' really, really loudly, in front of the whole trainload of people.
It suddenly switches to a third person view of the train. I'm not there anymore. There is a shocked silence then some random guy DC says:
'Well, he certainly gets his point across.' I then wake up.
^^^
ROFL!
I laughed so hard my sides split and I had to get a russian engineer to rivet them together again!
DC's kicked you out of the train...lol.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kiza
Walking down the street when i become lucid. I see some random man. walk accross the road looking at me as if he is coming over to say something. He goes!..
Mysteriouse man:"Wow, god. how about that. Long time no see"...
Me:ermm... do i know you?
Mysteriouse man:Oh yes indeed my boy... Sloth's tend to make me horny. And when they snot evrywhere, I like it a bit..
Me:....... ok then bye! :shock:
_______________________________________
flying around millions of foot up in the air... then in the corner of my eye... i see some random guy sat on a flying walrus.
He say's.
Guy: Oh mah gosh oh mah gosh!!... your... FLYING!! how in god's name are you doing that.
Me: dude.. your on a flying walrus. Right now, your the most amazing thing iv'e ever seen.
Guy: What?..... OH MY FUCKING GOD!!! (looks down at the walrus hes sat on).. JESUS CHRIST ALL FUCKING MIGHTY!! IM ON A FLYING SALAD DISH!!....
Me:.... im not really shaw how to tell you this but...... GO AWAY!..
Guy:I was thinking of giving my cat a sex change. But im not shaw if it's what she wants...
Me: ........:shock:
^that made me literally laugh out loud that guy made absolutely no sense :lol:...needs to be in a Lewis Carroll novel or something :P
Quote:
I grabbed those miniature french toast things, and he grabs cherios, and he goes, "Can I trade? I love those."
Me: "No, you picked cherios!"
Him: "But I hate cherios! What the fuck is the point of cherios?! They're stupid little tastless rings! I want to switch!"
Me: "Why would I switch for tastless little rings?"
Him: "Oh come on, cherios are great! They're delicious! I'll tell you what, just hold the box for a few minutes, and I'll take the other one, just.... just work with me, try it out for a second."
Me: "Okay *I take his box and he takes mine*
Him: *running away* "No trade backs!"
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH HAH!!!!!!:D:D:D
So my dream recall has been absolute shit these past few days, but I was in this dream either last night or the one before and David Cross(one of the greatest comedians ever) was in it. And he was wearing this...
http://images.google.com/url?q=http:...hlxYkKpJf0z3og
Yes, a full body cat suit. I think I got the image in my mind from the video this is from. LOL This one
Anyway, we're standing in a pasture/field and I ask him,
Me: "So, how long do you think we're going to be stuck here?"
David Cross:"Hmm, well I would have an answer for you but Zionists ruined my life"
Me: "o.O What?"
David Cross: "And I! Away!"
he put one arm into the sky superhero style and and stood on one foot, and flew away. Except it wasn't like superhero flying, I could tell he was on a wire and the technician was doing a crappy job making it look like flying. He was getting lifted maybe 4 inches off the ground every 2 seconds. lol
Sasuke that is sooooo fuckin hilarious :D :boogie:
great one xD
I found myself in a room with two of my friends, one of them looking very sad. I asked the happy one what was wrong with the other and he said, shaking his head, "he just hasn't been the same since the dinosaur attacks."
haha! one of my DCs did that to me during a lucid and it made me wake up. I was so mad!Quote:
Originally Posted by Kiza
This really isn't that funny unless you know my brother-in-law (he is very cocky and this fits him to a T) but in a lucid I had the other moring I walk into my kitchen to see my brother-in-law doing my dishes. I get mad that he is in my dreams and walk over to him and say,
"Why are you in my dream" He puts a glass in the dishwasher and then looks at me and replys, "I don't know it is your dream you tell me" He says this all matter of fact like while sruging his shoulders.
Anna:jester:
Not IN a dream, but last year, i was at my friend's house. we always went there and played video games all night. Anyhow we were playing ps2 and he fell asleep. Some time later, he woke up and randomly said, half asleep "i fell down" in an annoyed voice. we were all laughing so hard.
good times XD
and by "we" i meant like 5 of us always went there
This one happened to me last night, seeing that I had a bad 3/4/08 (Nathan and Haley about to get a divorce on One Tree Hill, cute girl winning Showcase on The Price Is Right and I was unprepared, etc.), my dream went lucid and introduced me to the mastermind behind the random attacks like a dream I had of James Lafferty in 2004 (Two other One Tree Hill actors were in it, but I was only to believe that they were trying to be the Hardys and Lita in WWE). And you know what's worse? It was a beautiful day outside in the dream!
"Quarterlife/Greek" dream character: (Can't remember what he said, but I believe he was talking to his girlfriend)
Me: Can someone turn that music down?
well i was being somesort of a spy kinda like ina a game (i had an inventory) and i shot at a friend with a shotgun but everytime this orange goo just came out, neways the first time i shot there was a pregnant woman next to him and she just says "oooh tummy" this was non-lucid btw
Happened last week, I was having one of those weird dreams at of being at high school....
Then Chuck Norris in all his glory bursts in the room and says "When are you going to take your English test?"
I have heard some pretty weird ones but I was replaying the Matrix scene and I was in slow motion and the guards were saying SHOOP DA WHOOP MOTHA F*CKAS I paused time floated to the floor and was like WTF???
I was catching a bus :
Me-"do you accept credit card?"
bus driver-"no"
I pay him with 2€
bus driver*filling a receipt*-"which chicken do you want?"
two brothers the skinny brother who's standing behing the shelves says to the fat brother: " this doesn't very zen to me" and the fat brother says "i'm a zen fighter *punch**punch*" then the fat one had a heart attack, he falls on the ground and i start doing CPR...
In my last ld i was in a shop and there was a big number written on the wall:
Me : Hey man what's with '7263232112' written on the wall?
Dc : *Puts on a malefic smile and whispers* The devil has many tricks...