I can't seem to explain it. But I tend to have very very violent dreams. I don't remember very many of my dreams, but most of the ones that I do are extremely violent.

First a little background. I've led a pretty normal life, I've never used drugs, I get drunk on occasion, but I'm a happy drunk when I DO get drunk. I'm 28, married, I have a great job, a nice house, lots of hobbies, and several good friends. I'm about as laid back as they get. However, I can and will fight back in situations where I think I'm getting taken advantage of (if I feel it's important enough to stand my ground). But overall, I'm pretty laid back.... I don't usually let very many things bother me.. they just don't. I'm very non-violent... and whenever I catch a spider or lizard in my house (I live in Florida), I always catch them and let them go. I'm 6'3" at about 200-205 pounds. I'm in pretty good shape, and fairly confident.... so I'm pretty sure that it's not any kind of a lack of self worth.


But, basically, this is how my dreams typically go...

I'm usually being attacked. When I am attacked, I always end up winning, but it's very brutal. I mean... I always end up going well beyond defending myself. I usually end up tearing people, limb from limb... beating in faces, all kinds of horrible stuff.

And just last night, I had a totally random dream that I was living in some sort of weird Mad Max 2 apocolyptic world. I was standing in some sort of a small colloseum watching an event (right on the sidelines). It seemed to be underground, but it still held maybe 1,000 people? It was dark, and the ambience seemed to be torch light. Everyone was filthy... most of them shaved heads, looked like they hadn't showered in months, and they all dressed like they had just come out of the movie the Beast Master, or Conan the Barbarian. So... in the middle of the colloseum were 6 people. It was 3 against 3. It was a fight to the death and most of them had shovels or something similar. At one point, two of the men were attacking this one guy at the same time. (they all looked fairly similar by the way.. in the way they kept themselves, but no one I recognized) This one guy was beaten hard with shovel and collapsed more or less. One of the two guys held the injured guy down while the other one forced both of his thumbs into the injured guy's left eye socket... basically destroying his eye and some white puss came out. The injured guy had this horrible look on his face like he had basically just given up and was accepting the fact that he was going to die.

What the hell kind of crap is that??? And why the hell am I dreaming about sick stuff like that? I like working on cars, smacking my wife's butt when she bends over, playing Atari, hanging out with my friends... normal conservative stuff like that. Where in the world could I possibly be coming out with this stuff? I mean, some of the dreams I have are so brutal that they make Hollywood gore seem on the same level as Sesame Street.


If anyone has any idea what the hell is wrong with me, I'd love to hear it. I just can't figure out where it's coming from. I've only been in what... a couple of fights in my life and I think they were all in middle school?


Thanks,

Todd