strange dream love? fear? help

This dream started out weirso...

Stranger than my usual strange dreams... It started out with me walking...

I walked by a church an my cousin came out and said to help serve his jail sentence he works there; well some how my friend billy appears too, and Damien convinced him to do the same. I watch in a state in wonder, at how he's doing things and not in chains, when he walks up to me, I ask him ..."did you miss me?" With fear in my voice. He peered down at me as if looking into my heart and soul... He pulled me close, and hugged me.

I was confused, we sat down on the church stoop and I parted from him with fear and confusion... He held his hands up fingers parted, and I grabbed his hands, our fingers locking. He whispered to me squeezing my hands, whispering to me he said "wake up" I close my eyes, and when I reopen them, he's gone as if he was never there, where I had previously interlocked fingers with him my fists had dropped to clinching, I look down and silver-steel cuffs are tightly clasped over my wrists, my cloths replaced by an orange jumpsuit and I'm being forced into a small dark room with two other women. Frighteningly in their appearance, they make threats at me and a fight breaks out, I with even my lack of skill though through the dreams power I muse at my fighting prowess, I peer as a guard towers over us there, telling us the church needed more work. And so they put us to it. We look around they have us spread and separated. I wander through the old dank building searching for the man I was just seeing before I opened my eyes. I see him in a library wing of the church, replacing books on shelves I try to talk to him and he tries too, until a guard steps in demands silent work and he moves in. I keep trying I can't accept that this is real, and all I want is yo hear his voice again. And then I do "wake up" behind me comes the very same familiar whisper.. What does it mean, I wonder? Is this real? Why does he want me to wake up?! I know I'm dreaming, and yet I keep trying. I turn around and he's gone again. What's happening? I turn again and he's turning a corner getting further away from me. I try to chase him. But it's useless... The words reverberate in my ears "wake up!" And I awoke from my slumber... I look around and I'm at my mothers house. curled in a fetal position, my hands shaking my heart racing, lying on the couch.

(I apologize that it sounds like a book ... I tend to write that way sometime)

:

:: I can't leave that blank like that! ::

You were going along in your life when you stopped by this part of you...
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SENTENCE:.
A church may mean your beliefs, values, which fits with your Spiritual side I guess.
Your cousin wants your help, even if within your mind, to help serve his punishment or prison time. He 'works' in the church means he is what it represents. So maybe church means sort of repentance for your sin here, correction, as does prison. But in a word, it means the right.
If this is a dream about a real situation with people you know, it seems your cousin made you admit, or you did, the wrong you did to him.
And that your friend Billy did wrong too, because he suddenly appeared when your cousin said to help serve the punishment. Unless your cousin is an intercessor, of the church so to speak, and the wrong is only between you and Billy.
But Billy needed convincing, he didn't admit his wrong.

Or Billy may just mean a part of you that you know and like best or else means you want to make friends with this situation which is only about the inner you, and your cousin Damien represents a part of you that is related. Or perhaps your real cousin is helpful and right, meaning that symbol. He works there in church might mean he is good and right in life or else is connected there because you admitted wrong and made it right.

But I think it is about the real people.
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FREEDOM:.
It made you wonder how Billy is not restricted or confined and is free. Because the wrong between you two puts you in chains and unable to do things - a prison. You wondered if Billy missed you, and the thought of his loss and not liking you scared you. So it seems there was a split in the friendship.
It can also have a double meaning: Maybe you missed that ability of freedom in yourself which Billy had, which scared you. Missed as in not necessarily felt the loss of, but overlooked it. Then Billy and his freedom aspect looked into your heart and soul, as you joined with him and it, becoming free.

You were confused, I guess at how you missed this, how to make it part of you as you left it, and how to be friends with Billy again. Then you interlocked with it again and this part said wake up in yourself is how you can fix it and become free.
You close your eyes, perhaps instead of open them. But closing your eyes can be looking within, but you do not see.
Frustration is the result, and imprisonment within, or restriction. Not freedom.
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PRISON:.
Now you enter the dark inner prison, with two other aspects of you which frighten and threaten you. You fight with yourself, with this undesirable side. But it is surprisingly easy to overpower it.
Another inner part of you guards you against this, instructing you the good work you began needs attending.
So you did. But you feel spread too thin, separated from it. So you search yourself for that part in you that helped you see freedom before, and locate him in your knowledge base of your values. {Notice how the church is the prison, indicating the two opposites co-existing. How the right can eaily turn the wrong.}
Here, you attempt replacing your knowledge or what you lost as you try to talk to your knowing free side, which tried to respond.
But now a bad guard in your mind steps in and silences that. Good can guard us and intervene with a good idea, or the bad can with fear and doubt.
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ESCAPE ATTEMPT:.
You keep trying to get out of this bad situation you know is unreal, and all you want is to hear that inner voice of freedom.
Then you wake up (I gather you mean in the dream from the horrible situation) which enables you to hear your friend, which also may be that familiar you, whispering behind to follow that instead. Not your falsely imprisoned, sleeping or unaware self.
Unless you meant wake up from the dream, which is still the same.

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RELEASE:.
Is this real? Yes.
Why does he want me to wake up?! If it is a real situation with Billy: to mend that, to wake up out of the dream of being in chains.
I know I'm dreaming, and yet I keep trying. You know you are living in a dream - that it's unreal. You keep trying too hard.
I turn around and he's gone again. You keep thinking Billy is gone. But he's not.
It's useless trying to chase him, then he will get further away from you.

The words reverberate in your ears, "Wake up!" and you wake up to that message of the dream, to wake up from your helpless scary position and see it is not real.
:parapet:
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CORRECTION:
Is any of this correct? How much is wrong?

wow (sorry i dont have net except in certain place ) thats insightl. im in loth billy irl, if t helps.. thank you very much for the reply! :)

Ahh, in love with Billy does help.
I had trouble with your being split from your friend. How you saw him as free but you not.
And your title, love? fear? alludes to that.

So basically, you were chained by love! Ohhh the humanity!!!!!!

maybe it wasn't just all that...

I just recently got out of jail... I went to jail WITH billy..over something we hadn't done..
the guard was also very mean and scary like in my dream.. :(