It's not that I'm new to this.
It's not that I try too hard or don't care enough or don't believe it will happen.
It's just that it never works.
There are certain people I can summon by just thinking of them, some whom I dream at night of by just thinking "I should dream of x tonight, it would be fun" during the day, and then there's her.
No, I'm not in love. It was an attempt to make a, well, a multi-person party. Dionysius style. Since I noticed she just wouldn't show up no matter what I made it my goal to get her to show up. For a month or so, in lucids beyond number. I've come close to a location I've designated where she'd be in my dreams but I always wake up. Also when I was falling asleep once I saw her there, clear as the text you're reading now.
I've dreamed of her before, in non lucids, but something has changed. To put it shortly, we no longer work at the same place. Since I doubt that physical distance would have any real effect on my dreams besides a psychological one, I turn to the beardy sages of Dreamviews for assistance.
I thought that it was odd the first time. So second time I gave it my best shot. Third time, fourth time too. By number ten I already started to expect a failure.
It's not that it doesn't work because I don't believe it will, it's that it didn't work so I don't believe it would. You get it?

Any help is welcome.