Just Another Dream Journal

I've known for years that I have a crush on my psychiatrist. It's only normal when he's the ONLY person in real life I have to REALLY talk to. I even told him at one point because I was holding back info in fear of making a bad impression. I told him that too.
But some things, I definitely keep to myself
Like last night's dream.

In the dream, at some point, we were kissing. He was a sloppy kisser but I still enjoyed it. Then we were lounging on a bed. That's what I enjoy most about these dreams- the physical closeness. At various times, I had my head on his shoulder, his chest, his lap. At one point, I was near his feet and had the crook of my arm around them. I asked myself why I wasn't grossed out (feet tend to be dirty and smelly so I avoid them IRL). I was just soaking up the affection.

Then he gave me an engagement and wedding ring and we ran away to India. He's from Egypt and that's where we were *supposed* to go before the dream decided to change things. I started getting cold feet, thinking of my hubby and children. He said he could drop me off at Paris and send me home, but he'd need his rings back. I decided I didn't want to go home
The airplane trip was long and exhausting and the airport was insane. There were people with guns everywhere (not literally, only about 3 but it felt like more). We became separated, and I needed a key card to get to the room. I couldn't remember the room number (our hotel was part of the airport as it usually is in airport dreams). I talked to someone and he asked me lots of questions to verify who I was. I couldn't remember where we were or where we came from. I couldn't remember my doctor's name, though I eventually did I couldn't remember how to spell it. I asked them to just call him and verify everything. Someone eventually took pity on me and did.
But then I couldn't find the room. It was either 3 floors up or down and I kept getting turned around. I was worried because everything important to me was in the room- my money, my DSi, my iPad, clothes, doctor lol etc.
Then I remembered that my mom and her friend were showing up. I was annoyed because no one was supposed to be there with us.
Mom's friend asked if I was in love with my Dr. and I couldn't answer her.

Then the airport became a hospital and I was still lost. Some madman was shooting up the place, hunting others down, but I walked right passed him, mostly unconcerned until he was out of sight. I asked someone where I could go for food, but the directions were too complicated.
"Alert Zone One" "Alert Zone One"

Then I woke up to the stupid perimeter alarm going off. It was around 5:30AM and I was ticked off to have been woken from my dream lol
I went back to sleep until 11, but I don't remember those dreams.

>> Interpretation:
I have a crush on my pdoc lol. I'm starved for affection. But I'm married with children and he's my pdoc, so nothing will ever come of it- which is why there were so many interruptions and interferences.
Am I in love with my pdoc? No. I've never been "in love" with anyone, though I thought I have been a few times. I LOVE deeply, though. I do love my pdoc, but I understand WHY.
As for the airport- I dreamed about that because I'm out of meds and my pdoc is out of town this week on a conference. He always flies.
I don't know why I dreamed of the hospital or the shooters.
I frequently get lost in dreams. I have no sense of direction IRL and in my dreams it's always much worse lol. It's a normal recurring theme though.
I woke up starving, so that's why I dreamed of wanting food.