lucid

#188 - 4:06AM - DILD

WBTB time: 2:45AM-3:00AM

I was really tired during this WBTB and could barely manage the 15min though I wanted to go for 30+. I think the tiredness and lack of good technique resulted in a failed WILD and a somewhat sloppy DILD.

I have a false awakening lying on my stomach. I feel like a child again and I notice I must be in my parents bed since my mom is next to me. I feel a finger poke on my back and roll over to see my dad. He says something about sleeping in my own bed and I feel a little embarrassed.

I go to another room that looks similar to a childhood bedroom except the furniture is scattered and out of place. I begin rearranging things and notice a soda fountain glowing in the corner. I think this is really cool and get closer to investigate. My mom starts talking to me from the other room so I leave it.

Now I am driving to work in heavy sleet. There is so much sleet on the road that it looks like heavy snow but the consistency is that of a flavorless snow cone. I try to get up hill and see a truck sliding on ice in front of me. My car dissolves and I begin walking. My sister calls me and starts talking about the weather and asking if I need a ride.

Suddenly I am in the house of the guy that was driving the truck. I felt a little out of place and exposed like I was trespassing. When he and wife looked surprised to see me, I waved and thanked them for the help hoping they would be fooled and go with it. They instantly smile and nod at me. I am annoyed at my sisters constant talking so I tell her I am busy and need to go. Her voice is suddenly cut of with out a good bye. I look at the phone in my hand to see if I had a dropped call but what I see there looks similar to a WiiMote. I shrug and push the power button and put the wiiphone away.

I make my way to the front porch and see my brother-in-law talking to my mother-in-law. I join the conversation and we talk about how I should have just shrunk my car down and put it in my pocket instead of letting it dissolve like that. I realize we are talking dream control and for some reason I say, "I am still dreaming" This surprises me and I think back and remember that I must have briefly lost lucidity. I feel like I have the beginning of the LD in my memory so I put the thought away intending to remember it later. Unfortunately, I have no idea what that part of the dream was now.

I wander off into the green grass of the lawn. I notice it is sunny and bright. Deciding I want my car back, I reach into my pocket trying to summon a shrunken car. There is nothing in my hand but I continue anyway hoping the dream will catch up. I make an enlarging motion like zooming on a touch screen but nothing happens.

I look around and see a really strange looking car parked on the street. It looks like the real life version of the car in Paranorman.



At first I think it's an old Ford but as I get closer its definitely more station wagon like with an exaggerated long front end. I hop in the driver seat and take off. At first the steering wheel becomes detached and floats unconnected. I do a double take and suddenly it is right. I shrug and take it as a strange dream glitch and continue on.

At first I realize I am driving in a suburb but as I set my intent the scenery quickly changes. I am purposefully trying to drive to the Great Wall of China. I don't try to force anything and let the change all with expectation and intent. I see dry grass land and then hills. Then out the side I see something just over the top of a small hill through the tall grass. I catch a glimpse of the Great Wall. I notice the large brown stone bricks with castle like parapets on top.

I become excited and veer off the road to drive up the hill but the car gets stuck on top of large rock and a deep rut. I get out of the car and notice there are people with me. The darkness swarms in but I hold it back and try to get my bearings. My wife suddenly walks up and begins talking to someone not part of the scene. The DC's that got out of the car start talking to me at the same time. I get a double image of two dreams overlapping each other and I become very confused. I relax my concentration and the darkness comes.

I find my self in the void then laying in bed in a REM atonia like state. From some reason I am very aroused and begin visualizing my wife having sex with me. There is no physical sensation but I wait in anticipation. Then I suddenly remember that I woke from a lucid dream. I begin recalling the details and the effort wakes me up completely.

Later I have another long dream about some kids bullying me and I confront them. Then I have to inflate the tires on my car but there is a problem with one of the valve stems. Some friend of mine helps me and I end up getting some contact cement from in the house. I create a gooey clumsy mess and doubt it will all hold. I tell my friend that is doesn't matter since this is all a dream anyway. For some reason I think of all as HI and not a full dream. I sit and wait on the dream now. As I do I begin to notice a strange faint grinding sound. I realize I have been hearing this for quite some time but I just didn't pay any attention to it. It becomes louder and louder until I am awakened by the sound of my wife snoring.

#187 - Around 5:45AM - DILD

I went for a weak WILD attempt after getting up with my son for a bit and got a DILD.

I am at what appears to be the house my sister and her husband first lived in. I am horribly late for work and think about calling in. Floyd offers to pay me $80-$90 to work the day for him.

I look outside and see Kindle with the baby. Then Jared, Tim and Brenda. Jared is saying hi to everyone but totally ignores me. I feel hurt and confused. I am shocked they traveled so far with an infant.

We all go inside and I walk way from everyone in thought. It occurs to me that this might be a dream so I do a nose plug. It's not a clean blow through but I just know I'm dreaming anyway.

I turn around to talk to everyone but the living room is dark and empty. It looks like grandma's old mobile home now and when I turn back around I see the back door and step out.

The sky is dark and starry. I remember my goal to travel to a distant star by zoom flying. I pick one and focus. The star gets large and bright with the usual strange distortions but I never seem to leave the ground. Not wanting to force anything I look for the moon instead. When I look all around, I only see a uniform blanket of stars in the sky. Must be a new moon tonight. I become dizzy and fall into darkness.

I don't want to wake up so I visualize the back door until I see it again. I think about simple shapes until I see it before me open and swung outwards. Wanting to stabilize, I reach out to feel the texture and mass of it. I note how vivid it is and begin to steady myself...

Unfortunately that's all I can remember.

I totally blew past my WBTB and woke up at around 5:30AM. I decided it was too late for a real WBTB so I focused on WILD. I guess I was too sleepy to be successful but something stuck because around an hour and fifteen minutes later I have two strange in dream DEILDs.

#187 - 6:45AM - DEILD?

I have false awakening but think I am really awake. I feel sort of like I am in sleep paralysis but I have no vibrations. I begin visualizing getting out of bed and I feel like I am really making a transition. I am aware of both my physical body and my dream body. I am on my right side and I continuously try throwing my legs over side and scooting out of bed but it's like my upper body weighs a thousand pounds and won't move. Finally I begin visualizing walking and soon it feels real.

Suddenly I get vision and I can see that I am standing on my front porch facing the morning sun. There is a beautiful jungle scene in front of me that is hard to describe. I see dense green foliage and trees but they look trimmed. There is like a type of tree limb ceiling above me and the sun on the horizon is peeking through. I pause and look at the vivid surreal colors before continuing. I realize that I have no lucid task in mind so I decide to just go exploring.

As I walk forward I notice that my vision is cut to 14:9 like on a wide-screen tv. For some reason I know that my vision will come in full once I leave the jungle and enter the full sunlight. There is some brief blindness as it does so and I stare at the sun. There is something odd about the sun. Shape... color... I don't remember. I look away and see several daytime moons in different phases clustered together in the pale blue sky. Most of them look waning crescent but one or two look last quarter and waning gibbous. I count them. 1,2,3,4,5. Wow 5 moons. I must be on another planet! I think about flying to one but they are so faint and pail that I worry I'll just get lost up there. I see another lone waning crescent making 6 moons, but seems to be in flux. It's not quite sure if its full moon or not. Suddenly, I realize I am conscientiously doing this so I leave it.

I turn around and see 20th street. I walk out into the empty street and as soon as I do I see something like a blue Prowler coming toward me. I stand my ground to let it hit me. There is a slight bump but it passes right through. I play with several other cars like this. I wonder if I can plant my feet on the grill of one and carjack like I did in a previous lucid but they all continue to be phantoms. Or perhaps I am the phantom. For some reason each car makes me levitate a little. I float around a bit and have a possible false memory of having a lucid earlier in the night. I remember having trouble flying and was swim flying with little success.

I get tired of playing in the traffic and notice that there is an empty lot with several storage trailers on the other side of the road. I decide to see what is inside them. But on my way over there I see that strange woman that I saw when we went grocery shopping in waking life. She is crossing the street the other way on a bike, eying me suspiciously. I rush over to her and for whatever reason I call her a few derogatory words. I pull her off the bike and pop open her blouse. "Yeah let me see some black titty!" Before anything else happens the scene fades.


I am fooled by another false awakening. I get up and do something. I'm not sure. My wife says something to me and I tell her I had that I just had a lucid dream. "So." was her only response.
"Whatever I'll just do it again." I lay back down and feel like that I can OBE on the spot at anytime. I relax and get back into the same SP transitional stage that I was in previously.

After a few moments I am fully lucid and heading back out the front door. This time I decide to go around to the back. I realize that I haven't messed around the alley too much in my OBE's. I do just that.

When I get there the sky is dark and the alley is much different than waking life. The neighbor's house looks like some saloon from Red Dead Redemption and the area reminds me of familiar dream location. I make my way up some exterior stairs onto a balcony, then around to the front side and in the house through an exterior door. There is a long dark hallway in front of me. I just continue on in the total darkness trying to see. I think they must still be a sleep so the lights are just off. In a second I see an open door to a bedroom. The sun is coming in the windows and the room is brightly lit. The flooring is pristine natural colored hardwood. The only piece of furniture in the room is a large bed with a cream colored comforter. There are two lumps under the blankets. I don't want to do anything too weird here (like the last segment) so I run and jump in between them on the bed. I wanted to shock and scare them as a prank but as soon as I hit the bed I have yet another false awakening. Before I can make anything of it, I wake for real.

I was going for WILD after my WBTB but I was very tired and my WBTB was too short. I had several awakenings but only remember two of the dreams.

#1
I am at work with some silver can in my hand it looks like a tall boy beer. I get the idea that has huperzine in it. I take a long drink and note the taste. It is very sweet and fruity with a pleasant alcohol after taste. I look at the can and see its Blueberry Pomegranate flavored. I remember taking huperzine earlier and try to calculate how much huperzine is in my system now. I worry that it will be too much.

I see Frank walk by and he comments on my drink. Something about how he wants to try some so he can get lucid. I am shocked and happy that I turned so many people at work on to lucidity. (actually just 2 in waking life).

I realize that having beer at work will get me fired so I try to hid it under my desk. Then, I not a horrible side effect of drinking huperzine beer in the day time. I am incredibly aroused and it will not subside. My boss asks me to come over to talk to her but I am too embarrassed get up out of my chair. I quickly wake up.

#2

I am at my old Jr. High cafeteria in Smithville, TX watching some play on the stage that was there in waking life. Then play ends but we they begin a second showing and every moans about it. We stay because we all feel obligated to support our children.

The curtain opens and someone is trying to hang something on a wall that had busted out sheet rock. I am curious if this is the actual play of if they need to fix the set. I wonder up on stage and some toddlers come out to play with me. I talk to one and then realize I am on stage. I duck and army crawl away.

I have a brief awakening and focus on my awareness and body.

#186 - 5:18AM - DEILD

I find myself back at my old Jr. High but I am outside in the commons area where we used to hang out before class. I am staring at the concrete and see the trash can that is always there. I look and see the grassy center and the structure around me. For a moment the memory is so vivid that it conjures up old indescribable emotions that are only connected to that time and place. For just that moment, I am completely overwhelmed and think that I literally somehow teleported there in waking life.

I quickly recover from this and assure myself that I am dreaming. I look around at the scene and note how correct everything seems. After a moment my vision gets a little blurry so I stop and remember my task. I walk around toward the gym and shout out, "CANISLUCIDUS!" CL's name sounds and feel a little thick in my mouth so I shout out his real name which is much easier to say. Nobody shows up so I decide to just call him on my cell phone. I reach to my right pocked were it always is and at first I feel nothing but after a few pats I feel a lump and then the shape of my phone.

I pull it out and blindly push something on the screen saying CL's first and last name then put the phone to my ear. I immediately hear a very stereotypical Russia man on the other end.

The details are a little hazy with the dialogue but I remember basically what was said. I may have to paraphrase a little here.

Man: This is [firstname][lastname].
Me: Uuummm. OK. Where are you?
Man: Rustonovic Farms (or something like that then some Russian phrase)
Me: Rustonovic Farms?

I repeat the Rustonovic Farms and the phrase several times to remember. I quickly decide this is gibberish and let it go.

Me: I want to talk to the real [Firstname][lastname]

There is silence on the line but I wait. Then...

CL: Hey! How are you?
Me: Hey! What's up,man? This is Mike. You know from the Internet. It's Xanous. (CL begins talking excitedly but I interrupt him.) I want to tell you something. You are dreaming.

I want CL to actually be here so I look over to my right expecting to see him. He's standing right next to me on a cell phone but he doesn't seem to notice that I am here. I look at him while talking.

Me: You are DREAMING. Get it? This is a DREAM.

The light of recognition seems to come into CL's eyes now.

CL: OH WOOOOW! Yeah I am.
Me: Ok good! So here's my code word. It's [code word] Remember that. OK what's mine.
CL: Account numbers.

I realize we started walking together now and notice that we made our way over to the high school parking lot. I look over at CL and he still has the phone to his ear like he is talking to someone else.

Me: Really? Account numbers? That's two words.
CL: [Gibberish]
Me: Ok so account numbers it is.

I realize that CL's voice has gone sort of flat and lifeless. I wonder if he's lost his . I look back over at CL and I see that he is a boy now and we are at my waking life car. I open the door. The dream is getting unstable and my lucidity is starting to slip. CL climbs up into the car and sits in a car seat. I go with the motions and strap him in.

Me: You're not really lucid are you? Are you even [first name]?

The scene goes dark and I find myself in the void. I quickly wake myself to remember the dream.

#185 - Time unknown - DILD

I was going for WILD and I hit weak vibrations two separate times but I was disturbed by my wife the first time and lost concentration the second time.

I am in the yard at the old house in Luling, TX with my bro. There was something going on at the church but I can't remember now. Some man walks up talking to me. I suspect he is drunk so I smell his breath as he talks. He purposely talks heavy so that his breath is available for smelling. He has halitosis up no trace of alcohol. There is some conversation.

I go inside to look at something and close the door. There was a lot of panel glass on the exterior wall and door that should not be there. I turn around and really look at the old house. It has crappy siding but I remember brick. My brother is next to me again and I point and say, "That should be brick. I remember brick." Then gradually realize I am dreaming and remember that last time I wanted to burn the house down. I yell at my brother, "Quick! Light a match!" He instantly produces a lit match and it put it to the house. It goes out for a second but I concentrate on what a lit match looks like and it re-lights. I find a quart of motor oil and pour it on the fire. Then I think what I really need is gas. i look down and see a red plastic gas can. I pour the oil on it and the fire trails. I visualize the fire melting the plastic and watch. Jets of fire come spewing out and spread all over the house. The flames looks strange like some kind of fiery water.

Satisfied, I remember the TOTM. I feel like I am going to wake so I hurry. I look at my bro and quickly step into the fire. I feel the warm like an electric blanket is over me and I watch the fire spread from my legs up to my arms and hands. My brother is just standing there, looking at me dumbly. The dream fades but I don't wake up. I have some FA.
I am looking astronomical data. It feels like archived Kepler data. Someone says to look for some star system called "Xeno" "Xenous" Something like that. The dream morphs and at some point Justing Beiber is making out with me. I am outraged when I figure out what is going on and I call him all sorts of names. Britney Spears shows up talking to me like she knows me. I can smell her perfume. I find her attractive for the first time but I realize how much I don't like her and I sort of pity her. I think it is amazing that I am standing here in a Wal-Mart next to Britney and the Beibs. I become lucid but can't remember anything. I must have woke up or had another FA.

There was some dream about Nix and the feeling or lucidity when I woke up for the morning but I can't remember.

#184 - DILD - 10:08AM - 4 of 4

I'm feeling ill today so lay back down for a nap.

I am sitting in the living room on the couch watching TV next to my younger daughter. I hear her say "[something something], mother fucker". This gets my attention and I look at her startled. I say, "Dalynn! You don't get to say that word. You're just not old enough."
She replies, "But mom said it. She said she was going to get lucid like a mother fucker." My eyes get big and I'm surprised she said it again. I look over at my wife and see is blankly starting at the TV oblivious to the conversation. Then I get it. Several things hit me at once. First, my daughter is really 6 but she looks 13. Second, my wife would have come unglued if my daughter had really said that. Third, the furniture was all wrong. Fourth, my daughter said her mom wanted to get lucid.
I say out loud, "I think I might be dreaming." I nose plug out of habit and blow through but it feels a little restricted. Hmm. I'm not sure now. I do it again several time until I am satisfied that I am dreaming. "Hey! I am dreaming."

Then I make a classic mistake of thinking way too much about my physical body lying in bed. I find myself in hard SP. I open my eyes and can see I am on my left side. My face is slightly buried into the blanket and all I can see is the gold and burgundy pattern of the comforter. I try to roll over but I am completely paralyzed. I feel really hot and think I am sweating profusely. I just want to uncover and get air but I can't. I feel claustrophobic and restricted.

OK I can accept this. I close my eyes and relax and transition out of bed. I feel like I am walking with my eyes closed so I instinctively open them. I really just open my physical eyes. I see the blanket again and feel surprised that I had not budged a muscle. I feel so hot. I close my eyes and try to move the blankets of me. I feel like I really did it for a second but when I open my eyes again I see nothing changed. I decide to just ignore the hot feeling again and try to dream. As soon as I relax I wake up and realize I am not the least bit hot or sweaty.

#183 - DEILD - 5:26AM - 3 of 4

This time my wife's not budging so I physically get up walk around the bed and hit the snooze button. I quickly lay back down hoping to DEILD

I get vibrations really quickly but seem to have trouble moving. I decide to roll left. I spin really fast and feel like I am moving a great distance. Then the motion makes me feel really nauseated so I stop. I just wait for the scene to form on its own.

I am on the front porch again. I see some a small strange looking green and yellow bush growing in the sidewalk by the steps. I float down to it and feeling it for stability. It must be only 2 feel tall.

Then I look up and see a woman walking into my yard from the street. She acts like she knows me and we hug. I realize I can't see her face in the darkness. I say rather franticly, "Let me see your face! Let me see your face!" I am obsessed with seeing her face now. I aggressively put my hands on both cheeks moving her hair back and tilting her face to the light. She looks like attractive with brunette hair and really familiar. I think of her as my wife but she doesn't look like her. (Past life memory?) We kiss passionately and fall to the ground near the curb. I begin to pull her clothes off. I don't care if I am lucid dreaming right now. I really want this. But no, she pulls away and laughs. She says, "Not out here. I need to go pee anyway." She runs into the house expecting me to follow.
The house always feels like a trap in my dreams so I really don't want to go back in. I really don't feel in the mood now so I say, "Well you have fun. I'm staying outside."
She calls back over her shoulder asking why but I just ignore her.

I stand there trying to look at the stars again with my hands in my pockets. Still can't seem to manage it. Suddenly I hear a car approaching. I see headlights coming form the North and I run out in front of it. I think of terrorizing them at first but decide to take the car instead. I stand in the road with my hands out in a "stop" gesture. The car slows and I hear the brakes squeal a little. It looks like an old wore out 1990 red Ponitac Sunbird. I can hear to door make a 'sqwonk' sound as the driver opens it and gets out. I decide to be nice but manipulate him a bit. I say, "Oh hey. Thanks for bringing my car to me!"
I can't see the man very well past the lights but I can see him walking away causally. He replies, "Hey man no problem."
I get in the car smirking at how stupid he was and mutter, "I love DCs."

I notice right away that the car sounds really rough like it's missing a muffler. This car's a hot mess but it really doesn't matter right now. I punch the petal down and drive off. The acceleration is poor but I'm moving. I forget to think of a destination and end up just aimlessly driving around at night. I keep telling myself that it is day time but the dream doesn't change for me. I continue driving anyway... Grand Theft Auto style. At one point I end up down town at a red light. There's no way I am stopping for a red light in a dream. I swerve to go around the cars stopped in front of me and sideswipe another car knocking out of my way. I watch the red light as I pass under it. Then I lose control and there is darkness. No. I'm just in a tunnel. There will be light on the other side. I begin to believe this and see in fact there is a brightly lit road several hundred feet away. At that moment the alarm goes off again.

Non lucid false awakening. My ass feels wet so I get out of bed. Glenn from works walks in the bathroom and laughs. He tells me I shit my pants. I take off my underwear and see I'm drenched wet with spatters of brown. I think I must have horrible diarrhea. I wake up on my left side. My ass was out of the covers and got cold.

#182 - DEILD - 5:26AM - 2 of 4

The alarm goes off and my wife hits snooze.

I hold still and concentrate on awareness. I feel someone stroking my hair next to me. I think it is my mom. The TV is on. I hear my dad on my right. I feel like a little child again. I am trying to get lucid. My left leg twitches and my mom laughs at me. She says something about me falling asleep. My dad just grunts a "huh". I twitch again letting my body do its natural falling asleep. I am aware. This time both legs twitch. My mom giggles. My mom? What the hell?

I realize I am deeper that I thought and get out of bed. I go straight outside out the font door. It is chilly and I feel like I am just in my underwear. The wind picks up. I feel it swirl around me then lift me. I am suddenly sucked off the porch and land in the yard. When I roll over to my back I see the porch light has become super bright. The intense yellow hurts my eyes and I advert my gaze so that I don't become lost in it.

I wonder around in the yard a bit, looking at the grass, feeling it and stabilizing. I see many stars but for some reason looking up is difficult. It's like my head wouldn't move up and my eyes kept darting back and forth. I wanted to focus on a star and fly there but I just couldn't hold it still.

Then I remember my original task and proudly proclaim, "I'm the doctor!" I left the TARDIS right around the side of the house. I fully believe myself as I walk around. I can see my back yard and a street light and BAM! A dark silhouette of something like a tall box. Not quite what I had imagined in my MILD attempt earlier but it'll do. I run up to it and when I get next to it, I see its about half my height. It's dark but I can see the police call box sign and the blue doors. NO! Not good enough I reach inside it and pull it apart. It stretches out and becomes big enough to step into. Ah but its just a dark box! I am a little irritated that it's not bigger on the inside with that sweet center console but I'm just glad I finally found it. I decide not to close the door and just imagine that its going to work anyway. I see the scene outside morph and change. It looks snowy for a second then darkness. Then someplace bright and sunny, Then I am flying. I see treetops and stars. Then it gets all wobbly. I can't seem to control it so I decide to bail. I jump out and find myself face down in the grass. There is darkness and confusion.

I am back in bed. I get up and try to open my eye but I feel like I open my real eyes.

The snooze alarm goes off.

#181 - MILD - 4:05AM - 1 of 4

I forgot the first part of this. It seems to be a very low level lucid. I forgot my lucid task - pretend I'm The Doctor and walk to the TARDIS... but the red converse came to mind.

I am with my parents in some clothing store already lucid. I wonder off on my own looking for something I might like. I don't really think to do anything awesome but go lucid clothes shopping! I find it hard to see what I am looking at. There are clothes rack with shirts and jackets but it's all blurry. I make some comment on this.

I find a little hidey spot in the racks and think I could have sex wife my wife here but quickly dismiss the idea when I look up and see a camera. Then I wonder off some more and see a wall full of red converse. I remember wanting to do some task about The Doctor.

I try to DEILD and go into vibrations but I can't seem to go much deeper. Every time I try to transition I end up moving my physical body. I eventually give up and go to the bathroom.

Before my WBTB I had a non lucid about being in college again. I was lost and late but all the classes were empty anyway. I saw my old English teacher from high school. I had to take some strange abstract test. We all sit in an empty gym with our tests while being distracted by a funny BBC TV show called 'Just For Fun'. There were bleachers pushed back to the wall and Mr. Bean was sitting on top staring at the TV like some crazy psycho killer.

I googled Just for Fun tv Show. It's a Canadian children's game show television series which aired on CBC Television from 1975 to 1976. BBC... CBC... Close

#180 - 7:07AM - DEILD/DILD - 3 of 3

The alarm clock went off at 7am. I let my wife be the one to hit the snooze because I wanted to go for a DEILD. I was a little disappointed that I missed so many opportunities to become lucid after the first two LDs. I didn't move a muscle or open my eyes and focused on the back of my neck. I got weak vibrations right away. I continued a little longer hoping that they would get more intense like usual. Another bad idea.

I found myself non lucid in a public restroom that looked a lot like a home bathroom. I take a leak in a normal toilet (not a urinal). A miniature version of Ms. Page (I'll leave the first name off to protect the innocent. ), an ex girl friend of mine that later became a good friend, is sitting on the back of the toilet with her boyfriend chatting away. I say something about privacy and go to a row of sinks to wash my hands. There is a soft soap pump bottle and when I squirt some out I knock over the bottle. The top was loose and liquid soap spills all over the counter. I notice several men on either side of me washing their hands. Embarrassed, I say out loud, "Ooops. Sorry, I'm still half asleep." I pause. Still... asleep. DING! The light comes on.

I realize I am dreaming and for fun, look into the mirror. I smile real big at my self and make funny faces. I'm really excited that I am lucid and it shows on my blurry face in the mirror. I leave the bathroom with no real task in mind and go exploring.

There's a slight memory gap but I was basically running around what looked like a shopping mall laughing manically and being overly hyper. I end up busting in some door that went into some office space in the back part of the mall. There are several women sitting at a conference desk. For some reason the song Hey Ladies by the Beastie Boys pops in my head. I confuse the lyrics a little and loudly sing, "HEY LADIES! WHERE'S ALL THE SINGLE LADIES IN THE HOUSE!?" My intentions were never sexual and judging by all the bored and disinterested stares that I got in reply, I think my subconscious knew it.
I say, "What? Really? Nobody?"

Then I remember that I saw Ms. Page in the bathroom and began to regret that we haven't talked in a long time in waking life. I see a corded phone on the conference desk and pick up the receiver to page her. At that moment I realize I have no idea how to page so I fake it. I dial 'star' 'eight', thought about it moment then, 'nine'. I hear a tone on the loud speaker and I speak, "Umm..." I hear my voice over the intercom and to my surprise it sounds very realistic. "(first name) Page please call.." Oh shit what extension? I look on the phone and see some random letters and numbers printed in white on black. I see '*16' and decide thats it. "... extension one six". I thought 'one six' was a little short so I add, "six six." Sure I'll add a few 6's. Why not?As soon as I hang the phone up it rings.
I answer. "Hello?"
I hear a very lively and smooth female voice reply, "Hey! What are you doing?
"Oh", I said. I'm surprised at how much it really sounds like her. "I just wanted to see you. You know... nothing weird. Just wanted to chat and see how things were going. Can you come here?"
She sounded happy about the idea. "Sure I'll see you in a minute." I hang up the phone and decide to walk out of the office into a more public area to keep things from getting awkward.

I find myself in a busy food court and take a seat on a bench looking around for her face in a sea of strangers. I feel the dream getting distorted and hazy so I get up and pace around. I still feel really amped up and decided the pacing was a good idea. My legs feel tense and energetic and what I really want to do now is go for a run but I force myself to calm down and wait. I'm curious if she will actually show up.

I come up behind one woman that I think might be her and quickly give her a friendly hug from behind but when she turns around it doesn't really look like her. I just go with it hoping she will change. I say, "Hi! It's good to see you again." The woman just glares at me. I notice now that she is a blond and my friend was never blond and now her face is all wrong. I say to her, "Oh sorry. I thought you were someone else."
She hatefully and sarcastically replies, "Uh yeah.. You think?" and storms off.
I shout after her, "WELL WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING?"

I search around some more and spot Ms. Page sitting on the bench that I was just at. I walk over and sit next to her. She is holding a toddler and I remember that she was pregnant the last time I talked to her in walking life. I study her face for a moment to make sure. It looks just like her but her face is a little shifty. I shrug that off as normal.
"Oh hi!" I said. "I forgot that you had another kid! What's her name?"
She starts talking excitedly but now the dream is fading. I take her left and and hold it in both of mine. I don't care anymore what she is saying and I begin to softly stroke the back of her hand for stability. It's not working and I shush her so I can concentrate.
Showing real concern she asks me, "What wrong?"
I say, "Oh nothing really. It's just that I'm waking up now and I don't want to." The scene fades to black.

I see another scene forming but force myself awake as I know my time must but almost up. The dream felt like it went on for a long time and I was afraid to forget.

The alarm goes of for the second time once I start to DJ in my phone.

#179 - 5:38AM - DILD - 2 of 3

On this one my memory is a little vague. I became lucid but only for a few moments. I've forgotten much of the detail so I'll be brief.

I am watching my wife give birth to my son for the second time. But this time she is in the bedroom on the bed and there is a midwife. She has the baby crowning the she suddenly flips over with her butt in the air. I see him pull an arm out and wave at me. This so ridiculous that I become lucid but only on a low level. I didn't decide to change anything or leave. I just stood there watching my son being born. After he was born I got a good look at him and noticed this face was completely purple. I didn't freak out as I knew none of this was real. My wife says to me, "Well, are you going to hold your son?"
I reply, "Yeah later after I wake up."
Then I wake up.

#178 - 4:13AM - WILD/DILD - 1 of 3

I focused on my face and body and fell away very quickly. This WILD was very different as I had no vibrations or OBE like experience. I watch the dream form and find myself standing in the kitchen. I feel really wobbly and the scene variies in darkness and clarity. I lay down on the kitchen counter and wait for the dream to finish forming. That was a bad idea because I fall straight into a false awakening.

The bedroom light comes on and my ex-wife was out of bed. She is holding needles and tubes that look like something from the plasma center. She is totally freaking out and goes on about taking two hydros and a B6. I ask her, "what are you talking about?"
Then she tells me, "I took all of the hydros and I have a drug test in the morning for school."
I feel confused. She's already been through the police academy but I guess she has some other class. I realize the implications of a cop failing a drug test but I am so tired that I just want her to stop whatever she's doing.
As if she was reading my mind she says, "Do you think I like having to do all this?" She holds up the large needles and tubes and continues rambling.
I interrupt her, "Can we just talk about this in the morning?"
Suddenly she stops talking and, while holding my son, gets back into bed.

Seeing her with my son brings me back to lucidity. This is just all wrong and I feel a little sick to think I was still married to her. I remind myself that the woman next to me was not her. I feel very relieved at this and at this point I thought I had really woke up and maybe I did. I'm not sure. I go for DEILD but it seems that it came way too easy. I feel vibrations right away and then quickly fade. I focus on the back of my neck and they come back but only briefly. The transition was so quick that I was fooled by another FA.

I see a light from a TV on in the room. There's a strange half partition with a 'window' next to the bed. On the other side is a large old TV and brown leather couch. My bedroom is so totally different than waking life but I catch on to none of it. All I can think was this messed up my DEILD and I need to turn it off.

I walk over to the TV. Even-though it looks like random words and images I recognize it as stats on my current Galantamine and DMAE levels. I paused at the TV for a moment looking for the remote but it's too dark to see by the light of the TV. Suddenly the lights came on (Thanks dream) and I look around. I see the bed and the lump under the covers on my wifes side. Daisy our dog is perched on top of her. I think about all of this for a second and let out a "Pffft" sound. I fell dumb for falling for this FA so easily. I rub my hands as a reality check. It feels vivid but a little numb like always. Yep that feels right. I open the bed room door and step out. I notice that I am coming out of the wrong side of the house. I can see the living room and the dining area but I am right next to the front door. Suddenly the lights go out. I say to the dream, "Light's please." Nothing happens but I hear a loud shushing sound coming from the table. I turn and find a working light switch. I look at the table but no one is there. I say, "Who's there?" I want to shout and scream and whatever it is but my throat feels blocked.

I am answered by another loud shushing sound but now it's coming from the bedroom behind me. Then the door starts to close and it pushes hard against me. I feel really scared now. "Who's who' who's", is all I can say. I feel like my ability to speak is fading away. I push hard on the door and get it open enough to look behind it but there is no one there. I feel really creeped out. But I'm laying on my right side not my left. I decide to bail rather than let the dream turn into a lucid nightmare and bolt out the front door.

Outside, there is daylight but the sky is overcast and gray. I'm fine with that. At least it's not dark I remember my task to summon Falkor and fly to China. I walk into the street and begin whistling. I try the two finger whistle like a cattle rustler but it sounds like too much air and is faint. I try several different styles of whistles but none of them sound right and I eventually settle on calling him like a dog. "Falkor, come on boy. Faaaallllkor!" I wait with full expectation but I don't see him. I tell myself to keep moving while waiting and calling. I know the dream always fades into something else or I wake up when I am too idle. I look to the southern sky behind me. There is a red star and a wide white streak. I tell myself that that is Falkor and ignore the red star. After a second I see the white streak begin to move like a fish swimming in the sea. I wait with anticipation as I see him begin to take on more detail and slowly work his way toward me. I notice that my feet have become painfully cold. Am I bare foot? No. I remember that I put my feet out of the covers when I rolled over during my WILD. I try to move my feet back in the covers and continue the dream. I feel like I was successful but at that moment, I suddenly and with out warning wake up.

#177 - 5AM - DILD - 2 of 2

I don't quite remember the dream before but it was a sex dream with my wife that turned into a FA where I realize that I am just humping the bed. I don't care it feels good but my face is buried deep in the pillows and I wonder why I can breath. I think that I should be having trouble. I roll over. Check for signs of a wet dream. Clear. I do a nose plug but it fails or I think it fails. I become lucid anyway because I recognize how dream like this all is. I get up and walk into the kitchen. The light is on.

I see someone that looks like my mom in the sun room. She spots me and hides in a dark corner. I think of the task again. I say "Hey. Hey you." She wont come out. I spot a pitcher of water by the sink and I take it up and slash her. Her only reaction is now she has the mop bucket and shes coming around into the kitchen to splash me back.
I laugh at her and say, "You're not real."
She comes into the light and looks like a very creepy version of my mom. She forgets the bucket and answers, "That's insubstantial and inconsequential." She rattles off a bunch of other big words that my dreaming mind didn't catch (I have trouble just trying to remember the first part of that) then says, "My Aunt warned me about you. You're a maniacal energy draining vampire." The dream starts to fade and I need to stabilize. So I follow her suggestions and throw myself on her to suck, not her blood, but her energy. As I do so the dream fades. For a Breif moment is see blue energy entering my mouth as I suck in. Then I bite but not hard enough to draw blood. Then nothing.

I have another false awakening but this time I put more thought into the nose plug. I cleanly blow out and laugh a little to myself. I'm very pleased that I didn't fall for the FA.

This time I walk into the bathroom and through to the other bedroom. I am still having doubts that this is a dream and I pause at the mirror. My face looks blurred and distorted. Ya ok I really am dreaming. I laugh and continue. The door makes a realistic sound and I slowly tiptoe past my sons crib into the living room. That that point I hear him cry out both next to me and in the other room. I for a moment the dream fades and I can feel myself in bed. I focus and wait a second. I feel my feet plant back on the floor and I continue out the front door.

I notice the porch light is on and its dark outside. I run into the street and see a car parked with tail lights lit up. (I forget the other task of finding Falkor and am still hung up on DC's) I shout, "Hey wait!" and run up to the driver side of the car. The dream starts to fade again but I focus on feeling the car and it slowly comes back as I continue with the dream. The window is down and it looks like someone is in the passenger seat but looks really comatose. I feel the driver seat and realize it is empty. Now the dream comes fully back. I can hear music on the radio. The seat is gray fabric and the engine is running. I decide this car is waiting for me and suddenly want to "drive" to China for the TOTY. I excitedly jump in the driver seat and floor it.

I drive around some slightly familiar roads and then the dream starts getting too dark. I try flipping on the brights but it didn't help. I say to the dream. "Clarity please." Nothing. I say with more certainty, "It's daytime."

Suddenly the scene switches to a view of some kids in a back seat riding along in the daytime. I focus and the view come around back to my POV and the road vividly visible in daylight. I don't worry about who's in the back seat. I figure its just more extras. Looking around I notice the terrain had changes significantly. I ask, "Is this China?" At that moment I see some palm trees. Then, I come over a hill and see a surreal scene with mountains coming right up to a beach and a blue ocean. I looks crazy but beautiful. I think, It's the beach maybe I'll do the Australia task. The road ends now and I drive over small hills and through ditches. When I some to sand and water I flip a toggle switch in the car and say, "Boat mode." Now the dream fades buy I can still hear the music on the radio. It's like some electric guitar instrumental but it sounds familiar like a theme song to some old sitcom. I hold on a bit longer and visualize being out on the open sea. It comes into vivid view just for a second and then I am hopelessly wide awake.

#176 - 4:31 - DILD - 1 of 2

I was driving along in the morning with someone in the back. I was telling them how sad I was that I had another failure and now its too late to go back to sleep and try again. I start thinking about what when wrong and why. I say, "Hell, I might even be dreaming right now." I do a nose plug. "I am dreaming!"

I remember the task to tell a DC they aren't real. I don't think of whoever is in the car but see people driving by in the light traffic. I realize that I am stopped and fumble the door to get out. The street looks like North Main near the VFW and that tank they have parked out there. I run to one car but they keep driving and staring at me. I run the other direction and see a woman with her kids turning toward the VFW. I yell, "Hey! Hey lady!" She slows down and tentatively stops. Before I reach the car the dream fades.

I try for DEILD. I hear myself singing. "Nose plug for the win." I stop startled. It sounded real but I can also hear the ambient sounds of the room. I wait. Now I feel vibrations. I try to move but my real body moves. I have heavy high. I visualize the first thing I think of. I see my hands so I start counting Huperzine A pills. The vibrations come back but then I hear the cat yowling. I go back and forth with the vibrations for a few minutes until I finally give up and DJ. I just couldn't go deep enough.

#175 - 4:41AM - DILD/DEILD?

I found myself practicing dream control by focusing and relaxing my awareness. It seems like I was at work and shrink heat shrink tubing with my mind. Finally, I focus awareness so totally that I realize I am actually lying in bed.

I say something to myself like, "Now that I got my awareness I'll just focus on my body untill..." My body suddenly fold in half and part of it feels like it is shooting straight up in the air. I feel happy now that it's go time and I transition. I have the strange eye thing at first and the bedroom is dark. When I step out I can see the rest of the house is brightly lit.

I wonder into the kitchen and stop myself. I started thinking about tasks. For some reason I thought about how I already did the one where you tell a DC they aren't real. I was really happy how long I've been lucid and glad I got to pull off another one. (Did I forget the previous dream or was this a false memory?) I decide that I want to summon CanisLucidus but I don't about think why. I try his reaching a hand out trick but it doesn't work for me. I feel really stupid standing in the kitchen reaching my hand behind me. I realize I'm sort of half squatting making a strained face. Well I wouldn't show up either. I decide I was trying too hard and use expectation instead.

I suddenly have an odd feeling like someone is with me or I am being watched. As I walk into the living room I tell myself he is on the couch and try to really believe it. When I get there I see a long white couch that we don't have and someone stretched out on it. They are covered head to toe in some off white electric blanket. I pull the blanket down and peer at the face of the person sleeping on my couch. I am disappointed when I see it is a woman. She looks a bit like the woman that showed up the last time I tried to summon CL but her face seems blurry. I said, "Can you transform into CL?" She makes some face that seems to convey, "I'm trying to sleep. Go away." Then she rolls over and puts her face to the floor. All the while I am visualizing CL and her hair changes to what I would think CL's is from the back. I abruptly wake up with no void or no easy DEILDing.

I have some mild wakefulness but luckily I've learned to get over this quickly. I forget to try another induction technique and have a couple vivid long NLDs with a lucid fragment

Just a quick summary:

In one I was sneaking around some building with my wife. I had parked the car someplace near and we took off on bicycles. We met some other ppl on bikes and was going to ride together. Then it starts to rain and I wonder how I am going to get back to the car without getting caught.

The second one I am watering the garden when I notice there are now 4 dogs in my back yard. I spray water at the two newcomers but begin to feel bad about that. They seems lost and I decide to find the owners. I pick one up and it is fat and cute but also looks a lot like some dog/pig hybrid. I marvel at this for a moment. Then I get it and yell at someone to come look at this before it's over (the dream). Again I abruptly wake up.