Venryx

Date: February 11, 2013 ||| Time Block: 6:30 AM to 7:30 AM ||| Length: 5 minutes. ||| Lucidity: level 2. ||| Entry Type: DILD ||| Major Methods: WBTB, SSILD

Methods: stayed in bed, (after thinking about stuff after a natural awakening from having set my alarm), for the second half of my night sleep; performed around 3 SSILD cycles before falling asleep.

Account:

I was lying in my bed. Somehow I knew that time had passed since the last time I was conscious. I did a reality check, and discovered I was dreaming.

At this I stood up, and clapped my hands a few times, I don't know exactly why but I think to turn the lights on or increase clarity. It didn't really work. I yelled something out, and walked out of my bedroom. I saw the light on downstairs, and I followed it. Now in the hall next to our dining room, I walk up next to my three sisters. I take a pause and try to remember what I wanted to do. I remember I want to try a test or skill that I can do wherever I am, so I don't need to worry about being in the right location to get better at it. I think of the fireball releasing capabilities. I try breathing into my hands in a weird way, I guess because I figured abnormal acts would be more likely to do something. That didn't work, so I figured I would just ask my sisters some questions. I walked up to Grace, and tried to ask her a question, but both she and Monica had headphones on loudly, and they refused to listen despite my insistence. So I gave up and turned to Chrissy. I asked her, "Chrissy, what is the purpose of life?" She responded with a utilitarian-type response, about achieving the greatest good for the greatest number, except I don't think using these specific terms. She actually finished the thought in one form, but then paused, and resaid it in another way. They were actually fully coherent. I think I said some things, and then she explained a slightly different view, that our purpose is simply to reduce "throughout the world" the amount of suffering as greatly as we can. I then talked with her on this, continuing the thought that "which will also naturally lead to greater happiness", with her agreeing, and then we went on. Eventually, we ended, and I looked for something else to ask. 'Hey, there's a calculator.' I then picked it up, and pressed a few buttons, which it somehow knew to mean, 'What is the meaning of life?'. I was just waking up, but I saw it spit out the numbers, ".06" on the first display, and "49" on the second. So ".0649", apparently. Cool, I always thought it was 42.

I woke up back in bed, and I instantly did a reality check. Aha, still dreaming. I went out of my bedroom, but I think I was wandering in the dark for a while. I remember that at some point, not knowing where I was, I saw a light flick on and I was in the sink room of our house in Wisconsin. Chrissy had apparently just turned it on. I said thank you, and we had a short discussion on something that I don't remember anymore. I then walked out into the living/dining room of our old house, and saw another calculator sitting on the island. I picked it up immediately, trying to ask it again about the meaning of life. I was trying to figure out how to ask it, when I thought of the number keys having letter equivalents. 'Oh, there they are.' My thoughts had made them appear just beneath the numbers, you know, the three letter combinations like "MNO". I actually spelled out "meaning of life", the entire thing, using these buttons, except I had the benefit of it knowing what letter I wanted out of the three each time. Anyway, I finished the phrase, and pressed the Enter button. It then displayed a menu, actually, with what looked like branches of philosophy. Oh man, I could get the same thing online. It didn't really give me a tangible answer, just statistical data and such. I tried navigating through it, but it was like an encyclopedia. Eventually, my dream faded.

Now back in bed, I did a reality check. 'Hmmm…' I couldn't really tell, the feeling in my airways when plugging my nose, was just at the point where it was inconclusive of whether I felt air pass through it or not. I yelled out something like, "Am I asleep?" to Chrissy, which of course didn't make any sense for a number of reasons. I somehow didn't find it unusual that I knew intuitively she was in another room with Dad, and heard her yell back to stop yelling. So instead I thought to myself, "Fine", as if that settled whether I was really dreaming or not. I then tried to remember my dream. But then after a few seconds, for some reason I stopped. And I stared at that text. 'Yeah, that bold, black text on the front of that tab, in that browser bar. I can know if I'm awake based on what that looks like.' So I stared at it, not realizing it made no sense to be visible, and I noticed one oddity, that it was bolder than tab-text usually was. This wasn't enough to make me realize I was dreaming, though. But enough that I thought, 'If this were a dream, I need to remember what this feels like right now.' I tried feeling my body lying in bed, and all the contact points with the blanket, pillow, and bed. And you know what, it was coherent and felt quite normal. But I did notice, that my body felt just a twinge more 'embedded' within the bed than I realized was normal. But again, this wasn't enough for me to realize I was dreaming, and I went back to trying to remember my dream. Within a few more seconds, I repositioned myself, and I felt something change. I then did a reality check, and I knew that I had just awoken from a false awakening. It's hard to explain how I knew; I believe it was the return of rationality, in a tangible way. You can feel when your ability to reason returns to you, by what could be described as a 'sharpness' or 'rigidness' of thoughts and concepts. It's that reality is more clear to you, suddenly. Anyway, at this point I realized that the dream account I had been forming within the dream had been lost, and virtually none of the dream was within my active memory. So I stayed in bed for a few more minutes, trying to re-remember the dream. I then turned back on my computer and wrote it all down on here, which I am only now just finishing.