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Non Lucid - (Ultra Vivid)

I am walking around with my wife in a building that has various tables set up with merchants selling cannabis. I stop at one that had some foreign word then "anti-anxiety". Well that sounds nice so I decide to buy some. I say something to the man that I think must be from Africa but he sounds Jamaican. I feel temporary confusion about what country I am in and whether this is all legal. I am looking at green foil packs of weed. Bemistaken walks up to my right looking at what all the man is selling. I give her a sidelong glance thinking she looks familiar. The man asks how much and I hand him a
15 dollar bill with two 5's. At first he says I can have what looks like eight or nine packs then stops and says he's not allowed to sell so many. I end up with two packs but he still takes my 15 dollar bill and gives no change. I hesitate but shrug figuring I still got a good deal. We walk away and I feel really excited to smoke some legal weed.

There's a part where I am driving and trying to roll a joint, then I am suddenly in my house. My wife takes a hit then passes it to me. As soon as I inhale I feel something like a mind explosion. BOOM! Then a second of darkness.

I am now in another room in the house. I look around not sure what just happened and I feel super stoned. I think maybe that weed hit so hard that I have missing time. I seem to recall my wife getting mad at me about something, but I feel so high that I don't think I can talk to her about it. I thing maybe my high is wearing off a little and I consider rolling another joint.

I am now standing in the bathroom with several zigzag papers spewing out of my mouth with the book in the sink. One or two feel stuck to my lips and I peel them off. I decide that maybe I am too stoned and have had enough. I am really shocked at the potency of the weed and wonder if I really did just take one hit. Now, I start hallucinating colors and streaks of patterns on the wall and decide I should go outside and look at nature. As I walk through the living room I pass a couple of large paintings that look super psychedelic. I enjoy what I am seeing, but I don't linger.

Similar to these:


I walk out on the porch and lay slouch down on some bench or porch swing looking at the sky. I hope to see something cool with the stars, but I see there are clouds in the night sky. The sky and the clouds alternate colors and I see some flash of light then it goes normal. Bemistaken comes out on the porch from inside and sits quietly in a chair. We have some sort of chit chat and then she asks if I saw the paintings. I say 'yes' and make some comment about how look it looked to me. Ask we are talking my attention turns to the large tree in my yard. I feel some sort of strange connection to in and then the colors of the tree turn into something like a photo negative then to x-ray. There seems to be some sort of skeletal system inside it and I feel the tree is sentient.



I can't believe I am having all these fantastic hallucinations and I am reminded or how utterly stoned I am. The euphoria is so overwhelming that all I can do is sink lower into my seat and hide my face giggling until I wake up.

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Even with me being lazy and not really dream journalling I've consistently recalled 1 or 2 dreams practically every night for the past few weeks. I found this dream to be interesting, vivid and quite insightful actually, ripe for interpretation. I know a fair bit of what signifies what, well along with the emotions I felt during the dream.

Dream 1: Fragment, I'm sure I was among a big group of people in some sort of wasteland/fantasy land, leading them perhaps, but not sure.

Dream 2: I was reading a book in my Media class, it was illustrated beautifully depicting a man and two kids fighting a fire in their house. I finished reading the book and our teacher said goodbye to us and started giving back some tests and some cards. I got 4 cards and the the bell rang and school was over. I then walked to my the train station with my brother before I opened up two of the cards. One of them was from a classmate and the other from the teacher, for some reason I didn't open the other two. I went on the train and I saw the student who had given me one of those cards and started talking with her. I saw she had a big sack full of cards and some presents which I inquired a bit about. After we talked a bit she said goodbye for the rest of the year. I was puzzled and asked her why she said that, as school still had one more day left before he holidays, but then she told me it was a public holiday and so today was the last day. I suddenly realized that I hadn't cleared out my locker or anything like that and panicked a bit.
Fast forward to the start on the next year, and I arrived at school trying to find a top locked (I'm 6 foot 5 and sick of bottom lockers ). I tried searching for one but the few which still didn't have locks on had people stuff in them anyway. In fact, I couldn't really find a free locker anywhere. I was looking around for help a bit when I heard an alarm go off and I saw someone I know breaking into a classroom with the key. Their accomplice got taken away and then n I woke up.

Level of Lucidity: 1
Level of Clarity: 6
Level of Realism: 7
(levels based 0-10, 0-5 being low - good 5-10 being great - extreme)

Parts of this dream are in present tense and some are in past tense. When I wrote this I had just woken up and was going back and forth between the tense because I was tired.

Dream 1: I am standing on a sort of futuristic football field with a large-ish African American kid about my age. He and I are supposed to be protecting somebody, but it’s not a life or death thing, we’re supposed to be protecting him in a game we’re about to play. There are tons of other people around our age (18) there, just walking around the field. Something happens and everyone starts running in the same direction, as if a race is starting. I start running as fast as I can to get to the front of the pack. The race leads off the football field, and there was a long handicap ramp for people to roll up if they’re in wheel chairs. I ran up to it, and jumped over the railing, taking a shortcut. I jump over the next two railings too.



I see that my old middle school friend, who I just saw recently for the first time in years at a grocery in the waking world, was running and she was in the front of the group. It reminded me of when we were back in school, and she would always be at the front of class, always putting her hand up first. In a sense she was leading the class.

I catch up to her and she seems to know where she’s going, so I start to follow her. We run through a building and then down several flights of stairs. The stairs change from being a house kind of stairwell to being an industrial kind of stairwell with cement stairs and railings and cement walls. All of a sudden the stairwell ends and we’re in a large cement parking lot. I looked around and everything had a sepia tone to it.

There were some tire marks on the cement, but no parking space lines.



I looked forward and remembered that I need to keep following her. She ran around a corner and got a slight lead on me, but she didn't know I was following her. When I run around the corner she is gone, and there are multiple stairways and multiple doors leading all sorts of directions. I had no idea which way to go. To my left was a scissor gate like a small business would use in a town to keep the front of the store inaccessible during the night from thieves.



I didn't have much time. I looked around desperately trying to find her, but I was too late. The herd of kids had caught up, but they were in the hallway that was blocked off by that sliding scissor gate. Cayla (my friend from school) was behind the scissor gate too. I looked at her and she looked at me as if to say “How did I get in here?”

I took advantage of the opportunity, and ran in one of the random directions. It led me to a train tunnel like place, and I kept running. Eventually I wound up at a bus at the end of the tunnel. I looked around and noticed that it was night time, and everything was dark. I got into the bus and sat near the front. There were already three other people on the bus. Two girls my age and one boy who I seemed to know from somewhere. Once I was on, the bus started to drive away. We drove down a street and I noticed that it was a place I was familiar with, my grandparents neighborhood. We all started talking to eachother, saying hello and asking names. I think one of the girls said her name was Stacy. She was very attractive. I then sat back in my chair and waited for a while. It felt like we were driving for an hour. By this time we were all good friends, even the bus driver. We pulled into a small city, and I saw some small houses on my left, and what appeared to be an amusement park in front of us. I looked down to the road as we approached a red light, and noticed that there was a small African American baby sitting in the road. He didn’t seem scared, he was quite playful. He was acting like a frog, and as soon as I acknowledged that, a black frog about the size of the baby appeared next to him. They were both sticking their tongues out and trying to catch something on the ground, perhaps an ant or a bug, with their tongues.

The light changed and we progressed on our journey. I looked behind me at the girls and noticed that they were making out. I thought to myself “ ……. HOT!” My buddy who was sitting in the back kind of looked at me and laughed then looked out the window, as if he’d seen this a million times. The girls off and on started kissing eachother, and I looked at Stacy and said “Can I help you girls out?” They kind of ignored me but I was persistent and said “I wanna get involved with that!” They stopped kissing and looked at me, it sort of creeped me out because they didn’t say anything for a second. Then Stacy said “No.” (Damn!)

We pulled up next to a large strange shaped rock/metal formation at the amusement park and stopped next to it, still on the road, by a curb. The wall formation looked like the wall in this picture of a ride at six flags:



We all got out and started walking, but we knew where we were going. After we turned a corner I was at my old house, which has recently sold. We’re standing in the driveway, and my dad and some people who seem to be his friends are in the garage next to a car with tools out. They say something taunting to me as a joke and we walk into the garage.

I felt a sense that told me “The whole reason we did this mission was to get here to fix something on a car.” It made me feel like It was a lot of effort just to do something so small, and why was it so important that all the kids from that school wanted to come fix it?

I heard some noises in real life and began to wake up and journal.

I used the WBTB and ADA Technique here, never became fully lucid, but was conscious enough to make SOME decisions in the dream of my own, but at no point had any idea I was really asleep.

This one has more false awakenings than I've ever had, so it's hard to keep straight!

I was hanging out with Stats and the rest of the Bridgies. I poked Stats on the nose, and I made her blush. I was excited by that. Then, I found out my mom was a serial killer based through Facebook. She was blonde, and was keeping the stuff she used to kill people in the room next to me. I eventually got so freaked out by the whole thing that I 'woke up' with a false awakening.

The first thing I thought was that I was disappointed the thing with Stats was a dream. But I was glad my mom wasn't a serial killer. As usual when I wake up, I performed a reality check, holding my nose. But I only held one nostril, so I figured the fact I could breathe was based on that. Then I believe I tried to go to sleep. Either that or I tried to WILD. Either way, when I closed my eyes, I saw extremely weird things so I thought I could do another reality check. I tried the nose again. Once again, I could still breathe. I thought about how weird it was, then I realized it was because I was dreaming!

I was so excited, I jumped out of bed. I looked around the room, which was really dark. It kept switching between looking like this big Victorian bedroom and the one I'd fallen asleep in. The bed was large and wooden and ornate. Slink sat up and asked me if I was still going to try to sleep/WILD. He reminded me that my mom was still in the next room (from the dream before.) That part scared me, and I got sucked back into the dream plot again. Slink managed to convince me to climb back into bed, but I kept thinking about how weird it was that my mom was blonde. Then I remembered I was dreaming, and I thought, "No way, I'm not letting this change slip by!" So I jumped back to the other side of the bed, where the door was.

I looked at my hands, which looked normal. I focused on them, then rubbed them because even then I could feel myself losing awareness. As I rubbed them, it was like everything came into view. I could see things much more clearly, including the door in front of me. It had been closed, but as I rubbed it opened, and I really looked at it. I was astonished by how real it looked! It was exactly like I wanted! I was really lucid! I started to rub the door on both sides, determined to keep my awareness. Then I thought, "What now?"

I remembered that I wanted to do the Task of the Month (trick or treating) so I tried to make the door take me to the house I imagined trick or treating at. I kept having trouble opening it, and when I did it was just a really dark room beyond it. So I tried spinning. I thought about where I was going, and spun hard. My vision went black and I felt myself falling. After a minute, I still didn't see anything, but I worried I was going to wake up... so of course I did. I had another false awakening. I was very upset that I had spun myself out of the dream.

After that I don't remember, but I didn't wake up for another few minutes.

And on it goes...

Part Five

I opened my eyes. Bright florescent lights blinded me. and I wanted to shut them. It felt like I had been run over by a truck. I had no idea that I had in fact been hit my a truck. I did a quick survey of my body and found everything to be in working condition, if not quite sore, or inflamed with pain. I wasn't going to let the pain get to me however. I knew that pain meant I was alive, and alive was good, for the moment. I turned to look at the sleeping brunette next to me. Sitting in the chair was none other than Det. Rizzoli. I smiled at the uncomfortable position of her body and the fact that her blanket was half off of her.

I leaned over and pulled the blanket up. I then slid my own covers off and decided to try and stand. I saw the condition of my left leg, but went for it anyway. I slid to the ground landing with a soft thud before collapsing in a heap. I pulled over the tray of hospital food that it looked like Jane had tried to eat. It landed on the floor with a loud metal clanking. Jane shot up in her chair and looked at the bed. She didn't see me in it so walked around the side of it to see if everything was okay.

"What the hell are you doing?" she asked as she squatted down to help me. "I thought I'd try to go to the bathroom. It didn't work." I mumbled. She helped me back onto the bed. "You know," I started, "You didn't have to spend the night with me. I'm okay." Something flashed across Jane's eyes. I could tell I had hit a hard spot. Something was off. I knew suddenly that it hadn't just been over night. "Yeah," was all she said back to me. "I'm going to go get a doctor okay?" She walked out of the room.

A few moments later Maura walked in. "Hey, Jane said you were awake." I nodded. "How are you feeling?" I mumbled something about being in pain. Maura nodded and said she would get someone to help with that. A few minutes later a nurse came in and gave me some pain medication. Maura and I talked. "So do you what day it is?" she asked me. "Well, I know its not the day after the accident." Maura seemed surprised that I knew this. "How did you..." I smiled at her.

"I could tell by the look in Jane's eyes. How long as she been here? What is going on with her?" I asked. "Its been about seven days. You were in a coma. I shouldn't be the one to tell you what's going on with her..." Maura looked down at her hands. The conversation seemed to make her uncomfortable. I was going to say that everything was going to be okay when my eyes rolled into the back of my head and my body began to spasm. Maura jumped up and yelled for help. Jane was standing nearby and came running. "What the hell happened?" she asked.

"She was awake and fine a minute ago." "I know," Maura said. "We were talking and the nurse brought pain medication. Then this happened." "Wait, what kind of pain meds?" Micheal (my son) asked. "I gave her codeine," the nurse said. "What!? She's allergic to codeine." A crash team shoved the three of them out of the way. Another nurse came in with some allergy medication, and something to stop the convulsions. My body relaxed and my heart rate normalized.

The next day seemed to start the same as the one before. I opened my eyes to the bright florescent lights of the hospital room I was in. Sleeping in a bed chair, unlike last time, was Jane. It must have been there that I figured out she liked me. Some strange part of her felt torn though, and I could tell. I looked down and saw the bright red band around my wrist. In dark bold letters it read CODEINE. I understood that they had given me some, not knowing I was allergic to it. This did not please me.

I looked at all the connecting wires and determined I was done. I was going to be leaving the hospital that day. I gently pulled the tape, holding my IV in place, off my arm. The area was red and allergic hives were present. 'Stupid people.' I thought to myself. I pulled at the IV, pain shooting through my arm. I was to upset to let it bother me. I pulled it all the way out and the alarm started going off. I looked at Jane. She stirred and opened her eyes. She sat up, "What are you doing?" "I'm getting the hell out of here." I replied back to her. I took one of the heart monitors off my chest and the beeping went erratic.

A crash team was in before I had the chance to rip out the catheter. I ignored Jane's complaining and attempts to get me to stop. It wasn't until a doctor came in that I was forced to stop. "I'll let you go tomorrow, if you promise me that you will behave for one more day." I grumbled my okay and laid back down. Jane received a phone call and looked at me. "I have to go," she simply said. She left without saying much more. I could tell she was concerned about me, and upset that I was trying to leave on my own.

Please read The Rizzoli Files before reading this. This continues the dream episodes.

Part Three

I was at home on the couch. I had passed out. There was a beer in my hand, but it had not split. I was groggy and set the beer on the coffee table and rubbed my eyes. I remembered what had happened last night. I felt both horrible and invigorated. I got up, still dressed in what I had been wearing. I walked over to the bar that I had in my kitchen. I heard my son walk down the stairs. "How was your date?" he asked. I mumbled something and he laughed. "A little hungover?" "Yeah, a little." I replied. "I'm going out for a jog. I need some fresh air." My son looked at me. "So you need time to think huh?" I nodded. I changed my clothes and headed out.

-Note: View change to Rizzoli.-

Rizzoli walked into the Boston PD Homicide department. Waiting with her coffee was Maura. She smiled at Jane. "So how was your date last night?" she asked. "Maura, don't call it a date, and I don't want to talk about it." Jane said as she took the coffee from Maura. "Mmm, that well?" "Maura, I said I didn't want to talk about it." Jane repeated. "What don't you want to talk about?" Korsak asked. "Her date," Maura answered. Korsak made a noise and Jane smacked him.

-Note: My POV.-

I was jogging along a street. I heard a noise behind me. There was a guy standing in an alley. I thought he looked a little sick, so went over to see if he was okay. I was grabbed from behind. The guy that had appeared sick stood up and turned to me. He had evil in his eyes. This was going to be a hard fight. He hit me in the face and my head flew sideways. Blood came out of my mouth. I reached for my cell phone, while kicking at my attacker. The cell phone was difficult to get to because I was in a bear hug lock from behind. "Ah, feisty one are we? I have the cure for that," the man said. I hit the send button on my phone twice, calling who ever was the last person to call me.

-Note: Rizzoli POV.-

Rizzoli's phone rang. "Rizzoli." she stated clearly. Nothing could be heard from the other side. After a few seconds she could hear screaming and a mans voice telling the caller to shut up. "Hel-" was the last thing she heard before the phone went dead. She looked at her phone and tried to see who had called. It was marked in the clear letters that cell phones come in Allison. "Hey Frost, I want you to run a trace on this cell phone right now." she barked. "Yeah sure, what for?" Frost asked. "Don't ask, just do it."

"Jane, what's going on? Is everything okay?" Maura asked. "Yeah, that call was from Allison, she sounded like she was in trouble," Jane replied. "Okay, I got it..."

-Note: My POV.-

I was huddled in the corner. One of my attackers was dead. He was laying face up with a huge shard of glass in his throat. I had a pipe in my hand and my head was down. My clothes were in rags, but still I sat there. It was as if time itself had frozen. Jane and Korsak came around the corner, guns drawn. There was no one there but me. Jane walked very carefully to me. She touched my arm and I stood up and started to swing the pipe I was holding. She took a few steps back, "Hey, its Jane. Its Jane." She put her gun back in her holster.

I looked up at her, tears filling my eyes. "I didn't know..." I started to say. "Shh, shh. Come here." She pulled me into a hug. I dropped the pipe and it made a loud clang. "Let's get you to a hospital okay?" She asked me. I nodded. Jane looked at Korsak, "Get Dr. Isles down here. I'm going to make sure she gets to the hospital okay." Korsak nodded.

Later that day...

-Note: Rizzoli POV.-

Rizzoli was in the medical examiner's office. She paced back and forth, wanting to know more. "You know, if you keep that up you will distract me." Maura (Dr. Isles) told her. "I'm sorry," Jane said as she stopped and leaned against a table. "I just wish I had been there to protect her." "I know, you're a cop. Of course you do." Maura said. "No Maura, this is different." She threw the ball she had been holding back in forth in her hands. "I feel different about her... it's hard to explain." Maura looked over to Jane. "Hey, what's going on?" she asked. Jane looked at her, "I'll let you know when I find out."

Maura's computer chimed. She walked over to it. "Allison's crime photos are in." Jane went to check them. "Jane, I don't think you want to see these." "Maura, I really want to. Please, just on the over head." Maura replied and punched a few buttons. There I was, covered in bruises. There was a file on the the slides. In small print it stated that they had discovered two different sperm donors. "God Maura, she was raped. In broad daylight." Jane sighed.

"Jane, I think you should leave." Maura stated. Jane looked like she was going to protest. "Jane, don't argue with me." Jane just nodded and walked out of the office.

-Note: My POV.-

I was sitting at the station. Korsak had come down to the hospital to pick me up. My son burst through the front door. "Mom, hey! Oh my god. Are you okay?" I hugged him. "Yeah Micheal, I'm okay." Korsak motioned for me to go to an interrogation room. Sitting there was one of those people that took descriptions and made pictures of suspects. I described what the other rapist had looked at. Jane was standing near the stairs to the medical examiner's office.

Korsak walked over to her. "She has a son?" Jane asked. "It seems that way." "How old is he? He looks eighteen." I stepped out of the room and was greeted by SVU. Both of them were men. One of them put his hand on me. I asked him to take it off and shoved it off of me. He did this two more times until I was yelling at him, "I told you not to touch me!" I shoved him away. The SVU officer looked like he was going to touch me again.

"Hey!" Jane yelled and they looked at her. "What are you doing to my victim?" She walked over to us. "Rizzoli, you work homicide, your victims are dead. We work in SVU, where our victims are raped, we have jurisdiction here," one of them said with a snotty attitude. "I don't care where you work, she called my cell phone, so it makes it my case. Now get the hell out of here." The two of them took off and she looked at me. "You okay?" I nodded.

We sat at her desk and she went over some of the things that had happened. After a while she said I could go, and that if I needed anything I should just call her. I smiled. "I don't have your number anymore. It was in my phone and that's not only smashed, but also in evidence." She smiled at me. "That's right." She pulled a card out. "Anything at all, you let me know." I smiled and said okay. I walked outside with Micheal.