All DJ Entries

Date: 18 March

Pre bedish: Vit C, l-arginine

Not quite the same results with vividness compared to the last time (15th) that used l-arg, but the wbtb did it

Pre wbtb dream: somewhat vivid but quite evasive for recall

wbtb: 1/3 latte

LD1: The beginning memory is quite vague but the dream starts in my parents' place where I shortly talk to dad, some minor awareness about this being a dream that goes away the next moment. A relative comes and I go to greet her but notice that she is shaking, try to calm her down and hug her but she shakes more. I take a look at my hands and for the first? time I see an extra finger next to each one (they are kind of separated yet moving together with my hand). This doesn't quite jolt me into lucidity as I don't give it any thought at all, still concerned about my relative. As I move a bit I finally recall the short lucid moment before and remember I was supposed to be lding. I walk around with no particular place in mind when I feel the dream starting to thin out. In addition, there is this real but dream amplified sensation of hunger in my stomach, which makes the dream even more unstable and me very pissed off. I drag myself forward near some furniture with a rather defeated mindset.

Then I see dad sitting at a long dinning room table and recall the Mad Hatter Tea Party task. I think my mom was also there, so I turn to the kitchen and tell her to make me some tea. I look at the kitchen but my mom has disappeared. No, just when I need her DC she's gone, I turn around and try to summon her, which should be easy, still no DC. Quite interestingly, I do hear loud noises coming from the kitchen as if she is there - the water running, dishes, etc.

I decide to summon a cup of tea myself and more like a habit, I move my hands closer as if holding a cup of tea and the next moment I start distinguishing the light tea liquid in between. After a bit, a china cup appears there as well. My mood is super elevated after this - an effective summon in direct eyesight - not what I expected! I place it on the table - its existence is very shifty, where I try to manipulate it into a proper looking and full tea cup. In the meantime, if not mistaken mom comes and leaves a small tea cup at the table. I pour some of the liquid from the large one into the small one. Now everything looks satisfactory. The cups are still a bit shifty now with blue decorations. This is probably the only less rushed part of the dream, where I actually decide to take a moment and examine the picture at the bottom of the cup and memorize it. It is a typical Chinese decoration in blue - a village person with a Chinese straw hat as if fishing barehanded in the river in front of a village. I even get to feel some cool false memories/info about the people that used this cup at this point in the past and their life.

The next thing I need is a rabbit and I think about one while looking around, then turning to dad to see that he is holding one - a real rabbit, but as I come closer to examine it becomes a stuffed toy rabbit. Oh, well, it's still a rabbit. Now I need the mad hatter and as planned I want to summon Johnny Depp to represent him. This will be a tough one, so I decide to summon him as Jack Sparrow as this role has the strongest impression for my mind. I need to feel his presence, so I kind of shortly turn into him myself as I shout out full of emotion in a deep male pirate voice "Captain Jack Sparrow". A bit worried about the strength of my voice waking me up. This is enough to cause strong thoughts about the character and a JS DC appears in front of me. He's not wearing all the make up, but has pirate clothes and the dreadlocks. Similar to my cup summons, his facial features quickly change to those of a random DC. That doesn't matter now, I notice he wears no hat and if he is the mad hatter he has to, so I think about a hat, see one, then another one that I triumphantly place on his head. Ok, where were we? Briefly lose mental focus, then recall about the poem. I only manage to say the first word and the dream quickly thins out.

My concentration/mental energy has been rather poor for a deild. I review the dream, conclude that this was probably it for this month, since it will be difficult to go through all the summoning again. I feel tired and decide to just sleep.

A few short non-lds and then:

LD2: Weirdly, (or not!) I'm at my parents place again. Initially we are inside and my parents interact with this strange retriever type of dog. But something's totally off with it. It comes wearing some sort of a napkin mask and as I try to ask the dog about it, it seems to be trying to talk - like a person with his mouth shut, he (later she) makes some noises that sound like real words that almost make sense to me. I begin to suspect that this is actually a person undercover. He also runs like a person in the yard and it turns out just that - some French girl is pretending to be the dog.

We are outside now and some family friends are visiting. I make comments about the way they are dressed. Suddenly, it dawns on me that I am at the same location of the previous dream and indeed dreaming. I wonder what to do and discard the idea of going for the totm again since there won't be enough time to complete the task, yet since there's nothing else to do and maybe it's no coincidence I have another dream here, decide to go ahead anyways.

There's a part that's open to the yard like a garage with lots of tables and all the family & friends DCs walking around and being super loud. I try to summon a cup again, this time one appears on the table where I'm standing. Also, in the distant end of the garage is another table with two large tea pots. I bring the cup over there, but it fills up with sugar as I examine the items on the table. I guess that's enough for a tea party and decide not to mess with the stuff anymore. The light in the garage gradually goes down - this is also the end of the garage, near the wall. The DCs make their way around the table, taking part of the tea party. I need the rabbit and without actively summoning it, notice that on one of seats around the table is actually sitting the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland (1951), wearing the playing cards type of clothes. He is animated, which is strange, but I'm just happy about the summon and wonder what to do about the mad hatter. Again, unexpectedly as I look to my other side I see the mad hatter (1951). It takes me a bit to actually realize that I'm looking at the mad hatter from the movie. What is even more interesting is that I get this very convincing memory that the clothes that he is wearing in the dream are the correct ones - and he is a wearing green! (later checked to find out that it's the right attire). The dream becomes extremly dark at this point with one last effort I make all the DCs repeat with me the poem-like thing I prepared for this event :

"Lucid dreaming,
what's the meaning
something's flying in the sky,
awesome feeling
rabbits speaking
why, Ophelia, why?"

The dream is gone and I end up with a short session of SP (being unable to move, while feeling my physical body, seeing only darkness). I wait it out, thinking I must have been on my back (slightly to the right but yes) and start telling myself about the dream.

DEILD: I expect to wake up, but involuntarily deild back instead. My mental continuity is messed up and during this part I shortly believe that I haven't left the dream at all. I examine the mad hatter character residue who turns into normal DC. I go outside and wonder what to do as there still might be some dream time, briefly question if it was ok to do another task, where I think about going for toty. I decide to go ahead. Some background DCs and me are in the yard now. There's a small black hound-like dog running around that distracts me and I try to ignore it as much as possible, while thinking about the beanstalk. I see some sort of bean-like seeds on the ground and take them, looking for a good place to plant them. I open my palm and see them undergoing many changes - all sorts of colors and shapes and try to make them a particular sort of beans again. After some struggle they look like dark red beans and I place them on the steps where there is a lot of muddy soil and cover them with it. One stone's hanging above and I think it will mess up how they grow, because of my thoughts. Anyways, I start to think about them growing and they grow into small shoots. The dream fades.

Note to self: All of the actively summoned objects were shiftier than the rest of the dream (cup, rabbit, js, beans)

3/4*!
I feel like this earlier dream was an important reminder (from my subconscious I assume) to let the family of the deceased know that they are still in our thoughts and prayers(done this morning!). The deceased died very unexpectedly and way too young! In it I dreamed of M from A again, along with G who died almost 5 years ago this month (I think he was memorialized in dream the night before (foggy memory night before) that also had M from A for sure and who ties in closely with G). Yesterday it seemed like his name might have memorialized on jerseys which were green and blue. Tonight it was a memorial in a grassy hilly area and M gave me a State tie pin that was supposed to be connected to G.

DILD: there is a party with family there and quite a few unknown people, quite crowded in some version of M Blvd but not really, perhaps my childhood home had some elements here as well. Someone says hey that sounds like a baby, do you hear that? I look around and I also then hear the crying and look down over my left shoulder and see very small baby newborn in a carrier on the ground. I go to pick up the baby with a big smile and very happy but then I realize that this baby showed up out of the blue and that I am definitely dreaming. I think of DutchRaptor-style tests of lucidity level and think to myself, since I am dreaming I have no problem dropping this baby back to the ground (from about 2 feet up) and I did so but it felt awkward and wrong before reminding myself...hey it's just a dream, move on. I think of the basic TOTM and I walk over from the living room to the kitchen and ask a female DC what her middle name is, there is a delay and I say nicely, I just need a name, your middle name. She says what sounds like "Frando." Then I am feeling a bit frisky and go around the house looking for an attractive DC passing my brother in law (one who moved about 1 year ago) and mother in law in a family room type area behind the kitchen and to the right of that my son is half awake on a bed in an odd spot in the open asking me what I am doing but I just keep going. I circle back around to the kitchen and two of my son's college age friends are there and I think, why not. I start kissing one after some flirtation and she gets a little too tongue-y for my taste and the other friend joins in kissing me as well...it becomes a little odd (too much tongue) and I fly up and out of the house. Looking at the night sky I think of the Bonus TOTM, alien abduction. I decide I will call out for them to come and get me but my voice doesn't come out right and it is garbled and I think that I was just talking to the DC with the middle name after becoming lucid, perhaps my SC doesn't want me to call out for aliens?? I think what the heck and I try again and I can talk clearly: "Aliens, come and get me" as I am floating maybe 200 feet up. I see a orangish-red circular coloration in the sky with a smaller circle in the middle but definitely not a ship, more like an aurora and nothing is happening so I say it again and then move on. I fly back down over a country-like neighborhood with maybe 4 houses including the one I came out of with the party. There is lots of space and land in-between and green rolling hills lit up in what looks like moon-light though I hadn't seen a moon so far. Out in front of one of the homes up and to the left from my downward view I see a woman in a long flowing gown with a young child just behind her and I swoop down. We talk and there is an obvious connection between us, I tell her that she is very beautiful. She looks a little like Scarlett Johansson (who I have been incubating an image of) but her cheeks are less pronounced and her nose more narrow. She grabs my hand and says, let me show you to your room. I say that I would like to stay with her and she says "but I have the kids (two) to look after" and I say that I can help her look after them but first I lean in for a kiss and we have a passionate kiss and I am so enthralled by the realism. I can hardly believe this is only a dream. She is so beautiful, she is so natural and not the least bit mindless and as we start to get on towards more sexual activity there in the moonlit grass I return to bed and I can tell that I am fully awake and there is no going back in but I am smiling from ear to ear, very enthralled. Perhaps this was my SC giving me a "true love" DC related to last months TOTM.

A little different:
Awareness work type: retracing my steps (&looking at myself from the outside)
Pre bed: quick review of recent dream signs: stars, tram/variation, my fam, ex's
wbtb: none planned but trouble sleeping around 6.5 hours(odd cycle, REM rebound?)

Date: 11 Feb

Pre bed: lecithin

Wbtb: 1/3+ latte

Was feeling super sleepy and even after the latte and mantras, I knew if I fall asleep nothing's going to happen. So I try to seriously to project my intent forward and expect an ld.

DILD: I mostly have some unconscious moments and then the next thing I remember is that I am involved in this dream in our old place, some scenario going on, but at the back of my mind is this vague thought about lucidity. It's mixed with all the false thoughts about the current dream, but for some reason I decide that whatever's going on is not to my liking and that this is a dream. My dad's walking around as part of the pre-ld scenario and I follow him to the living room.

He sits on the sofa now and I remember about totm. I ask him for a dog biscuit. He instantly hands me something that looks like a rubber dog toy in the shape of a bone. I doubt it's edible and ask him again, where he hands me a smaller version of the same thing. As I examine it, it changes slightly in shape, but I'm still impressed it's the shape of a bone. I ask him a third time, hoping it will finally work. He gives me a small paper package with something like a biscuit sticking from one end. I take it out and it's a bone shaped dog biscuit. I take a bite and slowly chew to feel the taste, it actually tastes pretty nice and fresh, like a normal biscuit and has this very pleasant walnut flavor.

Then, I recall I wanted to ask about true love and ask dad. He doesn't give me a direct answer but addresses the question and makes some rhymes (word starting with o?). Mom is now sitting next to us and I ask her as well. She gives me a long philosophical answer that sounds appropriate, but can't really recall. Then I go back to dad and ask again and he gives me his previous answer.

I go to my room and decide to leave the place and see my friend a few streets away. I'm floating, moving towards the balcony door and open it using tk/thought, another one behind it, open it as well. I think about floating down like this but want to go in the other direction so descend in a hard to describe dream way down the balconies which by then become much longer than rl. I have the feeling that am moving much faster than the dream is building, so slow down and have a quick look at some items in front of me. Only one more story to jump and I wonder from which side it will be more convenient to go - back yard or the street will yield less distortions. The dream becomes shifty and by the time I reach the street, it changes to a different place. I try to bring the old street back by turning around and describing what should be here. The neighbors, this guy's place. I correctly recall he was in the previous dream. Yet, the street remains the same. The dream soon ends. I feel like continuing sleeping, but start to forget details already.

So I am going through a roundabout where I have a vision of a website saying something about beleiving the dream will guide itself how you want it. I try this but lose focus for a nanosecond ruining it. Then I was finding a group working for a villian thinking of saving the victims and backstabing. The dream told me I my dc's soul mate ( a totm thing) and I think mine is the same person. Now I just have to ask

was I right.

Feb 10-11 2014 (Lucid)

The Chronicle Dream
* *I had a dream about the movie chronicle. I was a character with super powers alongside about 2 or 3 other friends and we were in a warehouse hiding from people looking for us.

Space, Summoning, Dragon Dogs, TotM's, and Reviving Zombies (Lucid)
*This lucid was very long, and several times I woke up but went back into the dream through DEILD technique. It was also hard to recall absolutely everything I did just due to the sheer length and detail of the dream*
* *Realized I was lucid. I knew I wanted to get to space, and an elevator was probably my best bet. I scan my surroundings and see some large skyscrapers in the distance, and knew they had to have elevators. I run over to them, crossing streets, sidewalks, and train tracks to get there. I stop at the nearest one, figuring I can figure it out with this one. I go around the side of the building and see 2 elevators in a section of the wall. I went to the elevator, and pressed the "up" button on it to call the elevator. It opened immediately so I stepped inside.
* *It was a fairly deep elevator, but the buttons were to my left just on the wall. I noticed there were only about 10 buttons and thought to myself that wouldn't work, so I waved my hand over the buttons to add more and a few more popped up. I wanted more so I did it again, but this time many disappeared. I do it one last time and a whole bunch appear, and I figured it was enough. I notice the text on the buttons keeps changing and the numbers are not consistent. Either way, I choose a high up button, and the elevator starts moving up.
* *It arrives fairly quickly on a high floor and I step out. I'm reminded of being in the John Hancock tower in Chicago as people were eating and just sitting around there looking out of the big windows. Looking out of the windows myself, I notice it was sunny in the sky with clouds extending forever in every direction. I start to be disappointed, but tell myself I can work with it. I remember techniques from DV to kind of trick your memory and what not so I decide to try it here. I told myself that we really were in space and what the windows were showing were just holograms chosen by the people inside. One of the hostesses kind of agreed with me and soon bright nebulae started to form in the sky. Giant twirling mushroom like things, large wormlike colorful nebula clouds, and other incredible sights starting passing by.

* *I decide to try a few other things while I'm in the building. I thought about doing some task of the month while I was at it, but had trouble remembering them. I get slightly angry since I helped partly come up with some of the tasks, but then remember the soulmate task. I asked who my soulmate was to a girl nearby, but I forgot what she said! I know she didn't specify a name and said something along the lines of I didn't need one, but I can't fully remember.
* *I also decide to try to summon a celebrity. I start thinking of female celebrities that I like, and Taylor Swift comes to mind, then Selena Gomez. I decide to summon Selena Gomez. A technique comes to mind from DV where I stick my hand behind me and then believe they'll grab it and then pull them into view. So I thrust my hand backwards and kind of say "come on up here" trying to beckon her into existence. I feel my hand get grabbed by another, and pull the person forward and, sure enough, Selena Gomez is the one attached to my hand. I'm ecstatic. We head over to a couch to sit down and talk, but I don't think much is actually said.
* *I also remember the task to dig your heart out and give it to someone. I knew there were plenty of DCs around to give my heart to, so I just started trying to dig my fingers through my chest. I'm normally able to phase through walls fine, but my fingers just did not want to penetrate my chest. After trying a little longer, I decide I'll try it later with another way of doing it.
* *At some point later in the same dream I'm just outside the building, back on the ground. I remember I want to ride a dragon, so I start calling out for dragons. I think of Eragon and how he calls out with his mind, so I yell out for Eragon's dragon, Saphira, with my mind as loud as I can. Doing so, I notice far in the distance two dragon are climbing all over a large building, and I call out to it with my mind. It reacts and starts flying over to me. When it lands I notice it's some sort of dragon hybrid with the body of a very large Rottweiler dog, and the wings of a dragon. I think it's perfect and it lets me on it's back. It takes off and we go a bit in the air, and it decides to land after just a little bit. When it lands it actually falls over and I kind of hop off. I notice it's a lot smaller than when I first saw it, especially the wings. It told me it wasn't used to being ridden, but I thought that was off since he's mine, and should be used to being ridden.
* *Later I remembered the task of reviving a zombie. So I start looking around for a zombie, and notice that my DCs seem to have all pretty much disappeared. I reach this small wooden cabin, when I see this figure in ice at the edge of the porch. Realizing this is the zombie I was looking for, I run up to it, and think of ways to thaw it. I decide to just use hot breath to melt the head portion and free it's face first. So I tilt it on the ground and start exhaling all over the face. It's slow at first, but soon it just all sorta melts away.
* *I notice immediately that the zombie trapped inside is my co-worker I, but with a green face. I think that it is weird she was the one my brain picked to be infected, and also weird how it's not a very gory face, just green. She notices me and scowls, and starts trying to break free from her icy prison. I realize I can score bonus points here by reviving with a kiss, so I swoop down and kiss her for a brief second.
* *When I stop I notice the ice has all melted and she is back to normal, although looks offended that I kissed her without her permission, and then she walks away. I think oh well, at least I accomplished the task.
* *Later in the same dream I created a whirlpool. I was in a boat and we were just headed somewhere. I think it'd be cool to just create a whirlpool, so I think about it, and the boat starts turning right, and the waves get more rough. I realize I'm creating it the wrong way and won't get to see it since I'm looking out the left side, so I somehow just flip the direction of the whirlpool and I see the center start forming out in the distance.
* *I wonder what things I'll see when we go down the center, but am interrupted by attacks from whale/narwhal creatures. Our boat is fighting back, but knowing it's a dream, I just kinda fling them back and forth with my mind, but it's not doing much good. It's now stormy and rainy out and I wonder how much control I actually have at that point, then I wake up and can't get back in.

Date: 06 Feb

Wbtb: 1/3 latte

I have a number of short lds that I chain through the void. Summary

LD: In my old room, stabilize by touching furniture. Notice that lamps are on. Find a newspaper I try to read with difficulty for a while. The lamps go off, I become blind and then the dream blacks to the void. I stay there for a bit, waiting for the next dream.

LD: In a car, get out of the car, notice my reflection in the windows. Hair is the same, but it gets in my face, I make a ponytail. I want to change the scene, try splitting the space, I feel another place, but nothing visually changes. I get bored, allow myself to fall back. This yields a number of sensations as well as weightlessness. The dream fades to the void. I wait for the next scene.

LD: I find myself in a nice hotel lobby, bright flowers decorate the place. Some guest DCs, a monk at the distance catches my attention, I go to check it out. The monk is gone but a few DCs are paying their respect to a metal statue. I have some mischievous thoughts, but bow down instead. There are two more statues (not in service), metal turtles. The dream fades to black, I stay still for DEILD but it takes a while.

Review in head, feeling tired, I fall asleep.

DILD+: on and off lucidity, FA, in- dream wild and sexy time

DILD: I find myself in this familiar place and start looking at the plants near the windows, try some tk on them, but it doesn't work. I think maybe there's a reason for this. Then I turn to examine the room, everything looks kind of blurry and unstable. My attention is caught by those lamps - three lamps, I try to identify if they come from a memory or just random ones, it's like my vision almost splits in two and there is a fourth lamp, but I try to focus more and they're back to three. I mentally make a note of the bad quality, then go down the stairs. I immediately regret doing so, because I run into the B6 DC and she charges at me. At this moment, I become quite concerned that this might truly be some sort of evil entity just using her form to terrorize me. It's just too active, so lively in the eyes and so aggressive. I have no choice but to face her. I think I say a few words, but her mood remains the same. Then I decide this is a good opportunity to do my breathing and concentrate on that. I do this for a while. In the meantime, she seems to have changed her mind about attacking me and is weeping.

Memory gap, possibly another blackout.

DILD: On the street now and I see this empty space in the horizon and recall I wanted to use something like this to draw a mountain. A bit uncerain if the dream will last long enough, with all the blackouts and instability before. I decide to go ahead with the summoning, yet before I do any motions with my hands I notice that the space isn't quite empty. It looks like in the very distance, as if seeing through the fog is something that looks like a large mountain. As I keep staring at it, it becomes much clearer and closer, till I find myself looking at a solid spot of the mountain covered with grass. The surroundings have changed without me noticing and I am at the foot of this huge mountain. I cover the majority of it with snow until I feel it's enough for the task. Then I examine the slope, which is initially way too steep to enable any upward movements. This worries me but I move to a part of it and feeling very excited summon a pair of ski and ski poles.

I totally can't believe the summon worked as I have nothing to do with this sport. Anyways, I start gliding up the slope, which by then is less steeper. Contrary to my expectations from real life, this is not as hard and actually pretty pleasurable. I glide upwards the slope which goes up and down and it feels as if I am on a roller coaster. Then I reach the top of the mountain and feel adventurous, contemplate on jumping from the top or skiing down. Yet before I can decide what to do, the momentum carries me forward and I continue moving in the air. I notice that I feel no switch in sensations from gliding on the mountain surface to this weird air movement. My mood is great, I gaze to what's ahead and not below me. It is a beautiful view of green plains, with a weird building with one-two statues in the distance and a very large gray palace next to it.

At this time it clicks this could so well be the palace I wanted to summon (while reviewing tasks during wbtb). I'm still skeptic that will be able to make it and complete the entire task but give it a go. Don't remember flying for a long distance, it's like the palace became closer as I started to focus on the steps of the task. I go in what looks like museum palace lobby, there's some thematic furniture, long red carpet or velvet curtains, don't pay too much attention to them. I immediately think dad. That's actually quite easy and there he stands in one of the side corridors. I say a few words to him, to mentally confirm this is going the way it has to be. Then start looking for the beast but there is no one in sight.

The room I'm in is pretty small and there are stairs going down and I go to the lower floor, looking for the beast. I run into an old Chinese man that I try to make look scary but no matter how much effort I put into this, he stays the same. I obviously start making scary faces and roar in an attempt to distort his features into evil ones, but he looks scared as hell and is shivering. I can't believe my DC is afraid of me and where is that beast? A couple of DCs that I don't pay much attention to appear and there it is - a disgusting beast. It looks like one H. Bosch's animals - a mixture of different animals, like a large pink pig and echidna, strange fur and the nose of a mole. It also is spitting something poisonous from its month and hissing. I so much regret not being able to summon my much now friendly looking lion man at this point.

Disgusted, I approach the wild creature, tell him I love him (it) and kiss it near what looks like its mouth. I remain with my eyes closed and wait a bit, but can still feel this thing aggressively making breathing noises and moving around. I know the curse has to be broken but nothing happens, and I can't take the little bugger any more. It's somewhat smaller now - the size of a cat maybe and I throw it away where it gets under some furniture. That thing keeps making the sounds, but looks wounded and in the next moment I see that it gives existence to a DC that comes out from under the furniture. To my amusement, it is a female classmate. Good enough I suppose. The dream soon fades.

Feb 2-3 2014

Zombie Revival Potion (Lucid)
* *I noticed an inconsistency in my room and became lucid. I stabilized and thought about what to do. I debated on either the task of the month and the year, then remembered the zombie revival task and went about for that task. I thought about ways to revive a zombie and realized I can just make a potion and that should work. I went and filled up a potion in a spray bottle from my sink, and the liquid was pink so I figured I was good without any extra ingredients. I headed outside through the front door to look for one but right when I about hit my street, I woke up. I tried DEILDing back in, but it wasn't happening.

Flesh Eating Zombies
* *I had a scary dream about zombie like creatures. But they weren't totally typical. They didn't care about anything other than eating humans. I was with my sister M and then a friend of hers at the house and when I realize there are a bunch outside. I immediately run inside to hide, and they basically give up looking for me the moment I'm out of sight.
* *At one point my older sister E says she'll distract them so we can either escape or figure out a plan, and she just runs for it and they run after her. I'm really distressed about her doing that so I run to my room (going outside first and then through my window) to look for my machete (which I don't really have) in my closet, but have trouble finding it. I see my airsoft guns, but know they won't do much damage. I eventually wake up while looking.

Date: 24 Jan

Pre bed: 200mg val, 50mg B6

Wbtb: 1/4 latte

Wasn't very wakeful even though repeated mantras a few times, fell asleep rather fast, had a few non-lds I can't recall

DILD: I am having a tense conversation with this female DC I know. She starts criticizing me. I reply that as a revenge I will then do something to make her feel the same way she makes me feel with all her comments. While this is a rather habitual mental reaction, I notice that contrary to other times I don't feel anything at that very moment. Still, as part of my revenge scheme I take her and turn her upside down in front of all the DCs in the room to publicly humiliate her.

As I stare at her, I notice that she just stays there, like a motionless puppet and become lucid. We're in a very large meeting room with a long table in the middle and lots of DCs participating in some corporate event. I'm in a daring mood and decide it's time to defy social rules by getting on the table in the middle of this meeting. Then I almost lose lucidity being carried away by thoughts of how all of the world's problems may be solved by by issuing unlimited credit cards to the entire population.

I keep thinking about this issue as I leave the place and continue towards an unknown city center. There to help me focus more I shout out loud "I am dreaming". There was a slight instability so this helps me ground as well.

Then I remember the invisibility task and go in the middle of the road pretending to be invisible.There are cars coming from all directions but as soon as I pay attention to them, they hit the breaks and spin a bit. I turn around and the same thing happens again. Then I see this huge truck coming in my direction. I start waving hands, checking if the driver can see me. He doesn't hit the brake or slow down and the truck is quickly coming closer. I step to the side to avoid the impact. There's little space between me and the truck, my uncontrolled expectations cause it to fall sideways on top of me, where I feel this huge weight on me. I try to move and free my head, but this results in a physical feeling, which gives me the impression I have just moved in my bed. I expect to wake up any moment but get an FA instead.

I believe that I have woken up for real and the first thing I notice is this piano music coming from the outside. I'm actually in the neighbors where we used to live some time ago and look to find where the music is coming from. I see this girl that I remember (possibly from another dream but could be false memory) who got that piano there and something about her. As if that isn't enough, the balcony is crowded - many people in their 20s and 30s dressed with business attire as if attending some sort of event. I'm think this is just too much when I am trying to fall asleep and decide this can only be a dream, reminding myself that I was trying to ld. Can't member how, but it seems I lose consciousness after that and have another FA.

I think in the beginning, I'm looking from the window to see what's down but then the scene changes and we move to this wooden porch. I initially see this strange big animal that looks suspiciously like a DS, I can't tell what kind of animal it is. Then there is a smaller one and I'm still trying to identify the large one. I'm starting to have some real doubts about this and begin to count the animals, one now looks like a bear and can't remember the rest but there's four of them. I conclude this is a dream and go to interact with one of the animals. It looks like a very large black boar/tapir and as I place my hand on its snout, it bites me and it even hurts.

I move slightly to the left and examine the rest of the area, where I notice a number of elephant-like creatures. I think they are separated from the porch, but no cage, it looks much like in a zoo. At some point the elephants begin to distort in features, open mounts and start roaring very louldy in a generally unpleasant manner. I try to stop them by thinking I want them to stop, but nothing happens and more join the roaring event. I remain there staring at them as they do so, kind of calm, but there's also this deeper inner response to their roaring, which surely is what is affecting them. I think that the problem is exactly this feedback loop - I am thinking that they are roaring, therefore they continue roaring. Then conveniently, I recall the inivible task and think it can be applied quite nicely here. I think that I am invisible. To my genuine surprise, at this very moment all the roaring stops for good.

I'm curisous to how far I can take this with my supposed invisibility and turn around and try to sneak out, while carefully listening for any reaction. The dream fades.

Notes: I have reduced B6 dosage to 50mg as previously it made me too wakeful. Recent valerian series - characterized by difficult recall, lower lucidity levels and more bizarre occurrences, in particular animals.

My gamecube is glitching, hm... yes! a dream. I want it to be Christmas, to the void. I render myself invisible and backflip through the wall, momentarilly being in the wall (somewhere I shouldn't be *smerk*). This is my time transportation method totm aside. I am outside. My dad parks his car asking me to get in and, as per usual, I get ditched. This happens so much I can psychically detect when I will be ditched or thrown into freefall and use those psycho powers as a way of gaining lucidity.
I get into an argument THE END

Date: 10 Jan

Pre bed: turmeric

Sleep was rather bad, like I was lacking some sleep chemicals, recall from non-lds pre bed - close to zero.

Wbtb: felt sleepy, had 1/3 latte

DILD+DEILDs: In a room and there's this kid from my childhood and he is somewhat grown up now. I am thinking about that. He's naked from the torso up and is sweating while vacuum cleaning. I am sitting behind a desk, contemplating and the thought that I was supposed to be lding comes to mind.

I begin to examine the surroundings and wonder if this could be a dream. Yet my thoughts are so orderly and organized at this moment and everything feels more like real life than dream (no usual dreamy feeling).

I keep thinking in what feels like a daylife manner, reflecting on lack of dream feeling. I know that in such a case I have to perform a RC, but I don't see any sense (like it's possibly going to fail). Something in me tries to convince me and kind of distantly makes me feel that right now my body is in horizontal position and asleep. I conclude that it is a dream and remember my goals. There is a black girl with ponytail and I reverse the inital plan (make an old man younger for the opposites task) and decide that I will make a potion to make her age instead. I feel conscientious about doing this to a little girl and how evil it looks, but really want to see the results.

There are a number of small items like two small cups, nail-size gemstones and something else I can't recall. While the dream is generally very stable, it begins to thin out at this point and I am left feeling concentration wise powerless and slowly find myself back in my body. Not ready to let go I remain still and short afterwards the I am back in the same dream.

It comes slightly as a surprise that I succeeded to resume from the same place, but welcome it and continue mixing my potion that looks like a shot of cough syrup. If I am not mistaken by the time I'm done mixing the dream thins out again and I am shortly back in my body.

The dream resumes again. This time I wait a bit before undertaking any task related action, thinking it may be proper to stabilize at this point so I unconvincingly rub my hands and run my fingers through a nearby towel, feeling it's texture. At this point the little girl and my childhood friend are nowhere in sight. I move away from where I was standing and look around, the entire room looks extremely realistic and detailed, filled to the brim with objects. It's like I am really in someone's room or a life memory. There are way too many objects for me to memorize so I don't try to, just remember a number of toy boxes with something written on the them in red, and a very prominent display of video games. There are two black gaming machines like from the late 80s.

The DC of my bf comes from somewhere as I am examining the room. Suddenly, I feel coldness on my feet and look below to see that I am barefoot and feel the cold coming from the green tiles on the floor. This is simply amazing and this whole dream feels incredibly life like detailed and stable (not so much vivid as detailed). I analyze this and share it with my bf who agrees with me. At this point I briefly wonder whether I might have run accross a smart DC and should ask some questions, but then remember my other tasks.

This time it feels appropriate to summon a DC and work from there. I decide I want to call Mrs. and think about her. The part of the apartment where I am looking, mentally calling for her is a bit dark and I briefly worry a scary DC might appear instead, but in a second, a DC that closely resembles her comes in. She has some sort of hat/bandage on the head. I get closer and begin to examine her face, she has lots of wrinkles on her forehead, around the mouth and saggy cheeks. I place my palms above her face to cover the places I want to change and then move my hands away. Initially, her face remains the same, but after a few more procedures the wrinkles visibly diminish. She doesn't look as young as I wanted but at least her skin is in much better condition, as if she just had a facelift.

Somewhere around this moment, the dream fades again. I know the drill and continue as usual, in the meantime become worried about my memories after each blackout/deild. I mentally count the number of blackouts to be sure, 3.

Back in the same room. I feel that I have spent too much time with this task, while there were other main tasks I had in mind. Time to go out and look for a palace. I head for the window and look down. Nooo! The whole dream continues to be worryingly detailed and realistic and it doesn't feel like a good idea to jump out of the window. I gather courage and hang on to nearby windows and water pipes to go down.

On the street I look around for a suitable building but become overwhelmed. In every direction I look are closely packed residential buildings. Finally, one of the streets seems somewhat less cluttered with a larger building at the distance that leads me to believe there's enough room for a palace round the corner. As I head in that direction, I have to wait for a large industrial truck part that's slowly coming out of a garage to make a turn and continue in, of course, the same direction as me. I manage to squeeze between the building wall and the large truck part and reach the end of the street.

Unfortunately, this turns to end of town cars-only road with lots of concrete and weirdly shaped boulders, cars passing by in close proximity. I think that I don't want to change the dream too aggressively as not to compromise the coherence. But maybe not everything is lost, I just have to find a way to cross over and go to what seems like a more appealing part of town. The dream fades.

Date: 08 Jan

Pre bed: 3mel

Wbtb: 1/3 latte, around 34 mg caffeine

I'm quite sleepy and resist waking myself too much, but still try to stay as awake as possible while in bed, repeating mantras and goals. I fall asleep with some long deep REM rebound.

DILD: It's a very long dream where me and parents get ready for a trip. Then I meet a DC that feels like a kindred sprit, I am eager to discuss with him possible solutions to a problem we both have.

A few moments later, I realize that this is a dream and remember my goals, freeze water and go fishing. The guy disappears somewhere. I am walking in what looks like a park and as I think about the task, I see that there are large puddles of water all around. Initially, I try to use them for the task even though they are too shallow and begin freezing them by willing it as well as by placing my hands down over one of them, where while they freeze, they emanate coldness and there's a cool mist effect lifting from the puddles! But then I realize this isn't going to work for the task and walk a bit further where there's a much larger and deeper body of water, like a pond.

I will the water to turn to ice, but to my surprise nothing happens. This annoys me. I contemplate whether to just get on the water as if it is frozen, but am uncertain if it will work, if I continue to expect to sink if I step on it. In the meantime, the water finally freezes. When I look at the surface, I see that part of it begins to melt already and dig with my hands in the softened ice to make a hole. This happens quite easily with no discomfort from the cold. There's some coldness, but it's ok, since I didn't think about it too much. I put my hands through the hole, reaching as far as I can and expecting to run across a catch.

I wait for a while but there's nothing around them and it gets kind of creepy what might be lurking in the darkness below the ice. In the area that's partially covered with ice, I can now see a number of small fish swimming around and succeed in catching one. It is a small tropical butterfly type fish but silver and red. As I hold it, my bf appears next to me and I tell him to take a picture, which I so much wish I could bring to rl, but before he can take the pic, the fish escapes.

I become so happy that have completed the task, I lose lucidity and begin to tell the dream to myself. After a while, I realize the dream is still going. Now I'm on the street in some neighborhood, there is an unconscious movement from my part and I end up floating in mid air, slightly above the ground, very stable though. I correctly recall this feeling from many dreams I had and exclaim to myself that taking off isn't as difficult as I have thought (previously irl). This is a good opportunity to practice a bit of flying and I do some flight manipulation, where I try to think of the direction and my body flies well in that direction. Then I try to take a turn and go in the opposite direction, but it doesn't quite work.

More rather random movements mid air and then I fly high up near a tall residence building, where I climb the last three stories using my hands. I somehow take a step back (see the building from a distance, although I am at the level of the third to last story). A black dotted panther on the balcony catches my attention. It looks kind of small, but actually it is the right size compared to the balcony and the stuff around it. The whole building seems small as if I am looking at it from a distance, yet I am very close to it. I briefly pay attention to that, but then wonder no more. There is a dalmatian in the apartment with the panther and I just so love exploring people's places, like in many non-lds. On the balcony below is a centipede, a very long one, apparently the same size as the panther (fits the balcony lenght). It doesn't look very appealing and I see two more on different balconies, I become vaguely aware that I am causing the one-many effect.

At some point I discarded the idea of going for Toty, because I thought the dream might end, but since it's still going, I decide to give it a try. Somehow, I go down to the ground and begin exploring a dream version of a familiar street. The bus station is here, only residential buildings, some larger buildings appear, but nothing that looks like a palace. I head towards the larger buildings that seem suitable and try to think that one of them is a palace. It starts to change, more and more detail is added and it becomes a flashy top notch casino. I still believe I could change it to a palace by trying to add a few columns at the entrance, but just increase the level of detail/casino quality.

I move on to the next building's entrance, which I recognize as some sort of amusement area. There's a distant dream memory also at work. Since I don't feel I'll get anywhere further with the palace, I eagerly get in, looking forward to having some fun. At this point I remember a dream where I took a super cool ride at a place that looked like this and become very excited. The lobby of the place where they sell the tickets is visitor empty, there's just the guy that sells the tickets, a girl that will ride with me and a male DC. The tall male DC next to my right is accompanying me to the cashier and I get a number of false memories and begin to have romance thoughts about him.

The DC at the desk gives me weird instructions of how to properly hold to the cart and my behavior while next to the girl that's also taking the ride. She is new, so I have to be careful. Bla bla, my lucidity level is dropping. I go to the girl and we wait to be let in to the ride but the dream finally fades and I wake up.

1/11*? + *!!! Wow! Had a great wild. Previously I am fairly sure I wild into a dream of me doing the ssild cycles thinking I'm still awake but not true LD since I didn't realize already asleep but was conscious of my last known condition-attempting a wild in bed...just waiting for a dream to start. I suspect this because of the amount of time that has passed and I get up go to the bathroom and go back to bed. I then think maybe what I experienced right before I woke up was hypnopompic...voices and vibrations. It feels like I may not be too far from REM because it is later in the morning maybe just over 7 hours after first going to bed. Sure enough it doesn't take long to start getting a dreamy feeling and HH audio first I wonder if it is my wife saying something to me or talking in her sleep but then I hear what sounds more like a crowd of people talking. I feel like I'm close and I decide to try to move my dream hands and sure enough I get a glimpse of
my dream hands then a good view of them. But it seems like my dream isn't ready like I am in the void. Could this be delta sleep on the way to REM instead? I recall what Sageous said about having a specific scene in mind on wild attempts. My go to scene is a beach. Visualize a beach but it is not anything like what I wanted. I do closed eye teleporting or changing of the beach scene maybe six to seven times. Most of the first scenes were night time and then I got one with a very odd creature in the water and I say no on earth, but had morning light! Close eyes again and say no I want white sand! I get it and sunny! I decide to go in the buff but at first the ladies are in bikinis. There should be nude waitresses...thank you. I pick one out she looks mildly Polynesian perhaps mixed with white. She is beautiful. We get straight down to intercourse. I have a pre-orgasm like feeling and decide I want to spawn the woman I met two nights ago but then I say no let me do the task of the month - I'm already by a body of water. I only think of the water in my immediate view so as to block out the idea that I can't freeze this body of water or that it may be too big or something. Like in my previous attempt I hold out my hands superhero style and freeze the water and I quickly spawn pointed saw again cutting a hole in the ice super fast pushing the ice down and over under the ice sheet and I quickly spawn fishing pole with bait already attached as planned, drop the line in the hole and very quickly start to feel a tug though not really strong. I fished out a purple fish or eel like creature! I was rushing through this process expecting I may not have too much time and this expectation creates a false awakening what at first I thought was my actual awakening. I was lying in bed recalling my wonderful LD for several minutes before waking into another false awakening in church at the funeral we're going to today! Awesome!

Previously most significant dream I was extremely angry at a company I am dealing with in real life. I do not remember last time I felt this much anger during a dream. No idea where this emotion came from! Perhaps it was due to an underlying fear that something would go wrong with this business and I got a phone call during the dream and my mind thought one of the possible reasons for me receiving a phone call and created the scenario which then brought up the real anger I would have felt in real life if I got that call! I hope this was not a premonition ! It is probably just due to the fear. 97; 96 was short paper journal

Date: 05 Jan

Noisy neighbors and dehydration = wbtb

I drift in and out of sleep. There's a short non-ld where I observe and discuss a huge dog, two other large dogs and their owners. We take pictures.

DILD: This one started right after the non-ld as separate dream. I was looking forward to an ld after the neighbor induced wbtb.

I begin to feel the surroundings and hear a gentle tune as if coming from a toy or a music box. I am aware. This time things happen much slower and I notice that indeed, it was dark around me and then suddenly I open my eyes and see. The room is bright and vivid and dream-like liquid. This is supposed to be our kitchen. I'm happy I noticed the opening of the eyes. In this official dream entry/realization moment the melody makes a concluding sound, it then starts again. I find one of those kid toys that produce similar effects and make it play. I still hear the gentle tune plus there is a second layer of slower modern music (like a techno beat) in the background. I enjoy this for a while, having the feeling that I left the tablet on and the music is seeping in the dream.

For my disappointment, I ascertain that there is no one here and I wanted to do the resolution task again. I approach the window and see that the neighbor's place is just below, there is a bed and his entire room is accessible. Without hesitating, I get down and end up in his bed, but then have second thoughts. Things look kind of real, what if this is rl and I am trespassing? I decide to do a nose plug, it fails, but I notice the feeling is somewhat different from rl. I'm kind of annoyed and can't remember any other RCs to confirm. Finally, I conclude that I probably wouldn't be that crazy to do this normally and resume my activities.

My hope was to find the neighbor in his room, but there's no one there so I go around. It's a huge apartment complex in an unknown place. I pass by the windows of a closed store, some really nice sweaters inside and I almost lose lucidity thinking about the brand and design. I continue on my way to see another store, also closed. It's dark on the streets, like the city in early morning with no people in sight, apart for a guy that goes in the direction where I came from. I think he is another neighbor and then the realization hits me that I can ask him. I go back and follow him to his place. He soon comes down being a completely different DC (tribal dots on his face) with two other DCs accompanying him. He claims they are neighbors. I also introduce myself as a his neighbor and ask him about his NY resolutions. He replies he doesn't have time now, because he just met the other neighbors and it's one per weekend thing.

I insist on getting my answer, "don't worry I am not going to bother you, just tell me what your New Year's resolution is". He starts talking but I can't catch the words, the sound is muffled. He mentions something about a woman and then after repeated questioning from my side finally replies "I want to be someone they always remember, always want to know". Oh, that is beautiful, I exclaim and repeat his sentence a few more times to commit to memory. Two other DCs come in. I try to remember my other tasks but before I do, the dream fades.

Dec 27-28 (Lucid)
I was by myself in a city trying to go see Lord of the Rings in theaters, and buy myself a ticket that costs in the high teens. I'm looking around for the actual room the movie is playing in, but go back to the ticket booth, and buy the ticket alongside a flight to Australia. I find myself heading towards the plane and getting on, but it's slightly militaristic, lots of military are our escorts on and it's slightly part of the act and show, but also necessary because the plane is important. I get on the plane, find the movie theater room, which is very very large. Probably like the size, area wise, of 8 large movie rooms. There isn't one big screen to look at, but several smaller screens pointing every which direction scattered throughout the room. I pick a seat eventually that's fairly secluded, but as I sit there, I start to think. I realized I should pick a better seat because I couldn't see one of the bigger screens well, just some small ones. But I also wonder why I'm going to Australia, when I had work the next day, and the ticket costs like over $400. I got up to leave and grabbed all my stuff. As I was leaving I texted my friend Trent telling him how I almost just went to Australia by myself, and I further realized how silly the idea was. As I was looking for the place that would refund my ticket, I realized it was a dream at this point, ran back to the plane and got right on and into the movie room. As I was running to the movie room I saw stickers and signs posted all over for the military saying "shoot first" and "be fast" and other similar ones. When I was in the movie room I wanted to watch the movie for whatever reason, but I find out that it's not gonna start for another 18 minutes. I realize my dream wouldn't last 18 minutes, so I grab a remote next to me and point it at the nearest screen and turn it on. There is some news playing or something. I pointed at other screens too but couldn't get those to turn on. Turning back to the news station, I want to see if there are channels or how it would work. I could see faces of the anchor on screen pretty detailed, but not words. I cycled through and realized it was repeating like 3 channels. At this point the plane is moving and going really fast, but not flying yet. I go to a window, which is somehow nearby, and want to go outside. I put my hands on the wall and then my head and I could push my head through the wall of the plane. As soon as my head went through the dream went dark, as if I was waking up.
I didn't want to wake up yet, so I just reimagined the sense of wind going by, then the sight of looking along the outside of the plane and soon I was back in the dream! I launched out of the high speed plane with no fear and landed running on some scenery. I was running very fast and wanted to push myself even further. I was running and jumping faster and then realized I wanted to try one more thing, teleportation. I thought back to what people said the best way to teleport was, going through a solid wall. I see a rock face just big enough and flat enough for what I need, and run up to it. I think about where I want to go first, and I decide upon a strip club (at this point I was losing lucidity and didn't have much of my better judgement ). I put my hands on the wall and it felt fuzzy, not like the solid rock it should have been. But when I pushed my head against the rock I phased right through. It felt only slightly solid, and it looked black and foggy on the other side. I walked forward maybe 5 feet then emerged in a small room consisting of 5 or 6 guys and girls that were in the process of undressing. The room reminded me of the airplane again and the DC's looked like flight stewards/stewardesses. I keep going forward and see an open door to my left and there is another room of people slightly further along in the undressing process. Before I see anyone actually all the way I wake up, because I was getting too excited.

Machines were being woken up similar to transformers, and were controlled by someone evil. There were humans chasing us down still. I was on a team of people running away from someone hunting us down. The ones hunting us gave us a head start because we did something nice for them. We went down a hole, and were sliding down for a while. We were in an ancient building and had to find our way out. There were creatures that looked like giant centipedes around trying to kill us, they were poisonous so we had to avoid them. I get stung by one as we're running away and apparently it's a big deal, but I don't feel hurt. We run back to my house and we're supposedly safe. My perspective changes to the guy hunting us and he uses these lights on a large globe to track us down. They zoom on our location which is a large tower on his 3D map. Back to my perspective we're talking and enjoying getting away, and the room looks just like my kitchen. Soon I remember I'm being hunted and bring up that they know where we are. Jim Hatfield, my co-worker, is next to me apparently and is mad I didn't bring it up earlier. Soon the people who let us go earlier show up one at a time and we start talking to them to reason to them. I realize at this point I'm dreaming, and my fear goes away. The people killing me though are supposedly other lucid dreamers, but I think they're DC's. I explain to them that if we're both lucid dreamers we don't need to be fear each other because we can't get hurt and we can always come back. The girl I'm talking to agrees, but replies that lucid dreams are few and far between and I realize she's right. Soon enough the main guy who was supposed to be hunting is comes in and I just ignore him. I want to stabilize the dream so I rub my hands together, then I want to try licking the ground or furniture around me. I started just runnin my tongue along the ground. It didn't taste like anything, it just felt like a flat surface. I also tried furniture, but this didn't work at all as I didn't taste or feel it on my tongue. At one point the dream fades out and I wake up, but I DEILD back into it. I walk around deciding what to do while I'm still in the dream, then try to levitate a bit. I jump up, try to float. It works just a very small bit on my 3rd try but I fade out again and DEILD back in. I remember I didn't quite complete the ToTM so I ask my DC mom who happens to be there for a present. She go grabs one out of a stack of presents that I apparently missed, and hands it to me. The wrapping paper on it was your average Christmas pattern of a color with trees all over it, and when I tore it open, there was another set of wrapping paper there, but this one was silver, and had these oval logos on it all saying "Dragon Force". I tore open this paper and inside was a box saying "Dragon Force" on it and inside the box were several dragon shaped gummies. I grabbed one and took a bite, and it tasted like a fruit roll-up. I looked underneath the dragons and there was another set of gummies that looked like transformers and also Galactus. I start laughing at the utter randomness that the gift turned out to be. I then go back to my room, wake up along the way but DEILD back in by licking the couch in the living room (it was the old purple one). One of the DC's who used to be my enemy but who was now my friend showed up and I offered to show him my room. He is happy to see it and follows me. My room is extremely messy when we get there, like you can barely see the floor messy, and I have to push everything out of the way. He is happy that it is messy (I seem flustered that it's messy and kind of forget I'm dreaming at this point). I see my Xbox one and it's crooked and broken on the corners and I get really angry. I ask the guy if he believes in shared dreaming and he responds yes, I say I don't and think he's just a DC. He starts laughing and I don't know what to think. The TV is turned on and people are voting on if they think shared dreaming is real. I wake up, but DEILD back in one last time. I ask the guy what it was like for him to have me leave for a few seconds, but can't remember if there was a response. I just thought I would have faded in and out if he was a dreamer. I then fade out again and wake up and try to DEILD, but can't this time. Now I realize how ridiculous shared dreaming actually seems (my personal view, not to offend anyone who may believe in it).

I was in New York City with my dad. I’m exploring by myself and a guy I meet says he needs help connecting to the cellular networks there. I decide to help him and get it working. We then go into a restaurant to go eat, but he thinks thats weird so he gets up and leaves. I follow him, flustered that he didn’t thank me for helping him.

I realized I was dreaming and thought about what I should do. I thought of a task of the month and remembered the invisibility one. So I think of the most classic "naughty" trick in the book, go to the girls locker room. I'm outside, and I know I need to find a school, but it's really dark outside and hard to see. So I put on some night vision goggles, and things then green but they brighten up. I see a school not too far away so I head in that direction. I stop and realize I haven't gone invisible yet. I just think about it and repeat that people can't see me. For some reason I knew it worked and I head inside the school. There were girls leaving and they didn't see me walk by them. I head to the girls locker room, and there was one girl left. But then she left and I was by myself...
I then remembered that I wanted to visit Erebor from the Hobbit. I decide to phase through the wall and think that's where I want to show up. I push through it remembering an old dream that's how I did it. When I go through, I come out in a fancy hotel. I thought about trying again, but I decided to just explore a bit and see if I could just "stumble upon" Erebor. I find a hallway, and then a door. I open the door and realize I found it. But it was extremely dark and hard to see. So I thought maybe I just need to help my subconscious out, so I'm walking down the stone stairs from the movie trying to think of what it looked like. It doesn't really work because I end up back at the hotel.

I'm at home, and for some reason my mom is like a tyrant. She loves Erica, but doesn't treat me very well, and treats McKenna like dirt. This doesn't sit well with me so I confront her, and get mad at how she treats us. She's confused at why I'm mad, and I respond it's mainly for McKenna. I trash some of the food she's made to let her know how angry I was and then left to let that sit with her. Soon some people come over, and I felt like I needed to tell someone what happened. I grab either my dad or someone else and pull them away from the crowd to my room, and talk to him saying I was mad at her, but she's still my mom so I don't know how I should feel.

I'm at someone's house, but we're like all prisoners there. Someone hacks a computer to give us GPS coordinates from the wi-fi. Someone breaks in because they knew what we were doing.

I look at a mirror and think I should try to see through this, then realize that means I'm dreaming, but I wake up.