• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. clxx. A quest for soup

      by , 09-29-2020 at 05:21 PM
      I thought I was missing a dream... It seems I skipped an older DJ entry by accident...

      12th August 2020

      8:30

      Dream:

      (points) Something about furry art. A kitchen, on-board a boat. Fancied two girls who were aboard. They were flirty? But they didn't know about one another.

      I was in some open restaurant area. I wanted soup from some famous female cook? I remember running in my home town. It was busy. I saw a motorised unicycle of some kind with a white paint job; I thought it looked kind of cool and I thought about how someday it would look out of place, outdated and silly. It was night time and I had to sprint my best (didn't feel dream slowness too much) to get to a harbour that was where the exit ramp out of town should be. From there, this cruise ship was leaving and I knew this because of its horn which I heard while running. I didn't want to miss it.

      I got to the loading ramp just as it was leaving and made a jump for it. It was a bare miss from my mark, plunging into water and grabbing onto a rear steering fin.

      From there I thought of calling someone (JC?, but the character or my old friend?) on the ship to bring me a rope. Then thought of just using a teleport command instead. No, instead I decided I could do this by myself and balanced on top of the steering fin and despite the water and speed, jumped forward and got on the deck.

      I got in through some doorway, watching my head. Passing thought of "so what if I fancy both of them?". I go down some steep metal or wood steps and I see her, one of these girls whom I apparently fancied. She was taking off some clothes in order to get changed. She had red briefs, a blood red colour.

      I remember we both smiled at each other but didn't speak. I had the awareness of having a glazed clay bowl in my hand and wanting some soup. There was a kitchen ahead through another bulkhead doorway. When I got inside the kitchen, there were two aggressive dream characters sort of accosting me. I forget who they were or looked like, but they were like pirates?

      Insistently I told them I would pay them to be left alone while I was in here. They thought I had nothing of value (mocked me?) and I remember scrounging through my pocket. Dozens of coins, I shove them at the two "pirates", the coins aren't nearly as valuable as I'd first expected however. I keep looking through my pockets. A stone? No, an ore nugget of sorts. It feels rough and I give it to them. It was a nugget of gold, but in reality the feel of it was more like a piece of pyrite ore like one I have in waking life.

      But I still decided this wasn't enough and somehow gave them something else but I don't remember what it was. They are now dumbfounded and agree to my terms now. Their aggression goes away, pretty much, and now I walk around the kitchen and see a very orange-y styled chest freezer, with pictures of garfield on it. I assume this is some BL ice cream thing A started.

      I remember going near a counter at the end of a queue bit, effectively bypassing said queue. But I felt as though I'd earned it with my payments to the "pirates". I still want that soup, but I can't or don't manage to find any?

      The next thing I remember, a black chef is getting fired and complaining that he was in a good mood and the head chef ruined it all and so on. I remember very shortly after, reading a review online that this chef left about the restaurant, saying very poor things about the crew or something. I feel that it's in bad taste (but feel some sympathy). Then I'm in an upper deck. Mix of a train and airplane aisle? Windows to the outside. It's day-time and some people are sitting in this cabin-like bit by the windows. A white girl says "I was pinning (some artist)", referring to how she was subscribing to this artist on some platform called "pin.it"?

      We're talking about furry artists, apparently. She mentions she feels embarrassed for talking about it out loud. A big black man sitting next to her, gives her some reassurance and tells her he actually had some interest in that same artist too.

      I forget what else happened, a lot of detail is absent from this DJ entry overall but I had a lot more recall of the dream initially.

      Some other bit about a base, partially in space? With technical-looking game block tiles and an ancient Egyptian ruin? Some overlap with the pirates somehow...



      Original note:

      - On waking I could smell the curry I'd left on a timer to start cooking at 7AM. The cookery related part of the dream may well have stemmed from that and from all the preparation I'd done for it last night. I also made a dessert, leaving the curry, the main course, to effectively cook overnight. In the dream, I was looking for a soup, which to me is traditionally a starting course.

      Added notes:

      - Quite likely the search for the soup was both a metaphor and a more literal desire at the same time. In the literal sense, a true full meal, to me, should include a starter such as a small soup, a main course, with meat or fish, and a dessert course, such as a sweet pudding of some kind and the meal we would be having the day of the dream would be missing this starter course. In the less literal sense, this food-related dream-plot goes back to old roots and to what I was used to having at meal times for a large part of my early life, so it seems somewhat nostalgic in a sense. I could extrapolate more meaning from this but these are the two most immediately relevant meanings to me.

      - The more carnal aspects about relationships on this dream maybe just came about as a coincidence with the food plot, since food and sex are supposedly pretty close in the brain, that's what makes sense in my mind anyway. But the two girls were also distinct in some way that I can't remember anymore (one may have been more open and the other more reserved and other such dualities?), so in the more metaphorical sense they are probably just relating directly to some aspects of myself, not to mention that at the time I was working on developing two characters that had a similar nature of duality between them.
    2. cxlv.

      by , 08-24-2020 at 09:01 PM
      25th July 2020

      Fragment:

      In some Minecraft-like world with H. There was a dragon of some kind that kept coming back and harassing us. We were at some coastal area and there was a passive (did I mean peaceful?) moment during which there were loads of weapons to select from.

      26th July 2020 (DFLN thread)

      Fragment:

      Voxels, some volcanic area. Solid magma blocks and generally some dark blocks. There was a sci-fi base.

      Fragment:

      Dream where I was eating cheese, I think in the kitchen. Vague memory of getting it out and cutting it.

      Fragment:

      Micro-dream after having been awake for a bit and then dozing off. Was listening to the cathedral's bells and then I saw a scene about a couple. I remember there was a part where they were chasing after each other in a playful manner and then they were going into a bedroom. I seem to recall some negative thing to this too?

      27th July 2020
      (DFLN thread)

      Fragment:

      HD and her partner D, at the end of the dream in some world that looked like it was out of Spore. Lots of weird bug-like creatures. (Nice, very descriptive...)

      HD is talking from a distance by voice? She's a mix of hershelf and S, my sibling's partner. H is almost giving HD a headache somehow. The dream had started with Minecraft somehow and it was a very fractured world. People from O's server were also there, as was my middle sibling.

      Dream:

      Don't recall the start of the dream but I was in a restaurant place with mom. It was like a Chinese buffet place, but not quite. I was serving myself, mom had just finished doing so. I remember seeing her across the way, on the other side of the buffet area. I got some breaded chicken thing and then wanted a bun, but for some reason I reached across the other side for one, carefully so as to not dip myself into any food. But I could have just gone around and I sort of realised this. Then I remember going to the table where mom was sat.

      There was a vacant seat to her right and I sat there. For some reason I was shorter or completely slouched now, so I couldn't reach my food properly. To my right was an Asian lady (Korean?) and she started picking on me for some reason. I remember telling her she was being mean and even went so far as to say that she was the meanest lady I'd ever met, as she kept continuously harassing me. After struggling with the food for a while I somehow managed to sit upright and felt much taller than before. I also thought I would apologise for my own behaviour.

      I told the lady she couldn't possibly the meanest person ever. I said that she had been a bit mean but not that much. We sort of reconciled.

      (recall gap or separate dream? have a feeling the sequences were part of the same here)

      Somewhere else. Fragmented. I was in a cave that was connecting to a (currently) underground and high-tech moving fortress belonging to "my" faction. I was going outside to do some scouting of a target enemy base nearby. It was a tall Protoss-like spire or tower, in the midst of a low flat area surrounded by cliffs. Come to think of it, reminds me of Howling Fjord from WLK.

      I remember getting back in the fortress and reporting my findings. Someone was "digistructing" something, to seal the entrance better. The entry point was a round sliding door, mechanical and heavy. This fortress' style reminded me of Grineer style.

      Some very early part of this there was this very cheesily painted bomber, fully patterned with a stylised USA flag pattern; it dropped some hooks for me and a squad to grab onto and pull us up, as it dropped a nuke at the same time. I think it eventually took us near the fortress.



      Must remember to tag this later.
    3. Being a guardian wolf and a very strange girl | [07.08.2020]

      by , 08-07-2020 at 01:32 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Being a guardian wolf
      I am some sort of wolf, and I am there to protect Snow White from once upon a time at some sort of warehouse. Something attacks. At some point I see myself in third person. I might have two different eye colors it seems, and I am in a sort of lurking pose. I might later be hurt.

      A very strange girl
      A girl is sort of really insane. Maybe she isn't even human. Maybe she even kidnapped me. It might be in some other world, but it definitely is very strange and has a strange feeling associated to how the world works. She at some point wants to do something really strange like building a cocoon..? And at some point she might have sent me into another world or something, maybe restaurant related. In the end she tries to stab me and we are suddenly in the hallway of my home, and then I try and choke her and she is suddenly a cat.
    4. Thursday, July 2

      by , 07-04-2020 at 11:44 PM
      I am working outside at Grassroots. The space doesn’t actually look like what we have; it’s more of an open dirt space with some tables, tents, and boxes, and I don’t see the store in the background. I’m sitting under a smaller shade tent, making a card. I must’ve put glue on the front, because I’ve poured quite a bit of sprinkles (pinks, whites, and purples) on and am shaking it slightly so they’ll settle and coat the front. Before I can finish, Ben comes over and asks if I want to learn ‘the fire’. I say yes, setting the card down and getting up to follow him. He’s not wearing a mask, so I am able to see his face. There’s a fairly large fire pit with a stainless steel ring around it that they use to do some kind of work. I’m not sure we’ve done anything yet, when everyone sits around the pit for lunch. I think that someone here makes lunch for those what want it but that about half of everyone has brought food. I have a grocery bag full of smaller bags of food items that is resting on my feet dangling over the edge of the pit. The pit is maybe ten feet across and there’s probably ten to twelve of us. I notice the different extents of mask wearing. Most don’t wear one, allowing me to see some faces for the first time. I wonder, but am not worried, about us all being this close. No one else seems to mind either. At some point, I am by Zoe. She is pretty close to me, and I notice how she’s wearing a thin, light blue bandanna over just her nose. I’m not sure how this is even done; there seems to be a twist in it - it’s coming from the side - that allows it to barely hang on. I’m thinking that it makes no sense and is bold for her. She happily tells me not to worry, that I ‘won’t be getting her air.’ I’m not sure.




      I’m approaching what seems to be a very hipster restaurant. It looks like Midtown, and I think I’m with two others (not sure who). There’s a section of outdoor seating that is a small triangle, the side of which is a thick, split rail fence. The picnic style seating is overcrowded with lots of black band shirts and long, greasy hair - that kind of crowd. We go in and are seated now. Our waiter is friendly. Looking through the menu of two to three pages, I decide that the place is overpriced. There’s a ‘dog’ (hot dog?) something for $20. At the top of the menu, it says something to the effect of: If something doesn’t come with a side, we’ll try to come up with something else. I notice a menu item that I think is some kind of pasta that I like for a reasonable ($12-13) price. The waiter sees me looking and says yes, it means what I think it does. I’m not sure I even asked him. He says part of it means salad or something about a salad. I think he brings out beer now. I am putting a bottle cap into an orange, plastic ring where it snaps into place. It looks like the plastic rings for a six pack of cans, but small enough to fit bottle caps instead. I think about possibly getting some beer on draft too because I see two guys at a counter with a pint of lighter beer each. They look younger and, for whatever reason, like they’re from California (they look extremely average, though). There’s a blond guy sitting alone further down this long bench. He is small but buff. He’s wearing jeans or overalls and a tight shirt. I think he’s talking on the phone and he sounds absolutely vapid. For some reason, I think he’s ‘typical Reno.’




      I’m in a large, opulent house on a hill where I know Jim, Rhianna, and Ella are staying (I don’t think I ever think of John - it’s almost like before he was born?). There’s something about a storm heading this way, over the nearby ocean. I’m looking for everyone, but they all seem to be taking a shower. I think Ella and Rhianna are in the same one or at least the same bathroom. I go into a dark bedroom and open the bathroom to see a dim light on and hear the shower with low water pressure running over a person. I know Jim is in there, so I wonder why all these lights are out.




      I’m with Melissa, and we’ve ended up at Dad’s house. This house is actually very large and opulent. I think we’re on the second floor, in the spacious kitchen with marble counters and nice wood cabinets. I smell something good and then notice a plate of barbecue chicken. We now decide that, on second thought, the smell is not that good. Dad now shows up; I didn’t know he was here.
    5. Thursday, May 28

      by , 06-07-2020 at 05:32 AM
      I am outside somewhere - it feels like an outdoor shopping mall or a boardwalk. I’m walking to a restaurant when I see Alex and Daylen. They walk over and we talk for a bit. I go into the restaurant now, more of a counter service place (maybe a MyPie?). It seems dim and there is a long, double backed line of people, spaced apart by pieces of large white tape on the grey polished concrete floor. I notice that everyone in here is around 16-18 and immediately feel out of place. Despite their age, I can tell they are from this certain generation by the way they’re dressed and talking (*This reminds me of the barista last night that I thought was a pretty stereotypical example of the younger-than-me generation).




      It seems really early in the morning (dawn or just before), and I’m walking up to some chain food place. I order two black hot coffees, just assuming Brittney is coming to meet me. When I text her, she says she’s already getting coffee somewhere. I finish mine, which actually has milk/flavor, and start on the other. The coffee is good for a place that doesn’t specialize in coffee.
      Categories
      Uncategorized
    6. Saturday, March 28

      by , 03-31-2020 at 04:58 AM
      I am somewhere outside? with Melissa, Pepe, and his mom. I think they both look high and then, sure enough, she lets on that they are. She confides in us that Caesar is the head of some pot farm/ selling ring or something similar. I can see it, imagining him and his boisterous personality right now. Now, I am climbing up through some tall and thin wooden structure. I pass through ‘floors’ that are spaces barely bigger than my body. Each side of the space, I think even including the top, is a mirror, making for a trippy experience. I now get to what seems to be the top. It is different because the sides are concave, joining in a small ceiling, and it seems there’s nowhere left to go. I don’t accept this possibility though, and push on one of the sides. It opens and reveals a vast, dim space that I think may be the pot farm.




      I am in New York City with Melissa, walking along a sidewalk. The street is busy and I can smell and taste the putrid emissions from passing trucks. The sidewalk is close enough to the street, but it thins even further at one point, leaving hardly any space for foot traffic. We pass a tower with a parabolically curved glass facade. The glass is mostly translucent, but it gets much dimmer higher up. There is a space behind the glass, in which there are large advertisements. Melissa says something about how they won’t even be visible. I agree. We end up in a restaurant that seems familiar (from another dream, I think). I notice a couple about our age in the booth behind us, across from me. They are dressed pretty nice for this place and sitting on the same side. I think about their life. I notice a man in sunglasses sitting alone at a booth diagonal from us. Melissa asks to trade sides, and we do. I look through the fairly short menu and decide I want pretty much the first thing on it, some corn dog things. The waitress, brunette and maybe 30+, comes over and seems out of it, like drunk or sad or something. She gives us a minute. I look at the extensive beer list in the back. They’re sorted by brewery (they must all be local - I don’t recognize any), under the brewery’s logo. The price per beer is then listed after the name, lowest to highest, separated by slashes. Most of the first prices are six to seven dollars, but I see prices like 9,16, 27, 59, etc. I think these prices must be for bottles and/or pitchers but that they’re still ridiculous. I guess that’s just how it is in the city. Nothing sounds too good anyway, so I figure I’ll settle for a slightly cheaper bill. The waitress returns and sits by me, putting her hand on my shoulder. It could be a nice gesture, but with how she is slightly rubbing her hand it is taken a little too far. She takes Melissa’s order and then mine. I say ‘I just found something, where did it go?’, trying to find it again. I find it and tell her while also pointing. She doesn’t say much. She comes back and sits again. This time she reaches over and grabs my crotch. I am a little shocked and put my own hand over it. When I move my hand, she does it again and then leaves. I text or tell Melissa and she just shrugs it off. I want to tell her what kind of reaction there would be if the genders were switched.
    7. March 3, 2020 Non-Lucid

      by , 03-22-2020 at 09:33 PM (Deep Inside The Lucid Dreamer's Subconscious)
      The dream was in a courtyard but also some sort of gymnasium too. I think I was on UVA's grounds. I was in an open courtyard that had a clear middle and then on the outside were a handful of treadmills that were hiked up very steep like three feet up. The outside walls had a step up into archways that led out of the courtyard. My view was shifting throughout the courtyard, it was fairly crowded with students hanging out and walking around. I was trying to find an open treadmill. Eventually I did find one that was hiked up and I was trying to lower it.

      After that I grabbed onto this thing to pull myself up on the outside of the courtyard into one of the archways. The thing was like a metal fencing that fell backwards when I put my weight on it and I hit the ground. I get up into the archway and it's a living space with a few rooms. I notice James Bu and a group of guys who I think are Lizzie's friends. I get the feeling that they had been hanging out all day together and getting high. My view shifts to a garage with a car and in front are two kids in a double stroller and another kid who is about 10 years old. I think it's James Bu's little brothers. The 10 year old is smoking out of a gatorade bottle gb which shocked me. James reaches over and pulls off the hat of one of the kids in the stroller like a lid and inside is a premade second gb filled with water.

      The dream shifts and we're now out in some mountains similar to LA. I think we might have Ubered there. I get the thought that Lizzie was going to this italian restaurant with the group of people but I was not invited. A guy comes out of the restaurant and starts to whisper to Lizzie and I think he's trying to get her to ditch me and go inside. I end up walking away. I'm looking at the ground at dirt and a white towel covered in dirt.
    8. lxxiii.

      by , 01-30-2020 at 01:57 PM
      Some fragments from last night.


      Fragment:

      I was in some kind of starship, not unlike one from Star Trek but there was a mixed feel from several space stuff, including a bit from Starpoint Gemini. I was captaining the ship and we were headed straight for a blue-ish planet, covered mostly by water than anything else. I could see the system's star just left of where the planet was, much further away.

      Some four or five other green-coloured ships appeared, intercepting and following us closely. I suggested to an officer to simply activate the cloaking device ability and could see in a third-person view from outside the ship as the field enveloped it and the other ships disbanded in separate directions. (Expectable AI behaviour if it were a game)

      As we got very close to the planet, I could see everything in a sort of cinematic view and then the ship started getting close to the ground to land somewhere but for whatever reason it had to be at an airport, so the ship kept making really wide loops closing in and away from the planet surface.

      Every time we got close, I could see on some disembodied interface some information about the local surface structures. I did see a fair few airports, but many of which had tractors lining up vegetables in the runways. This annoyed me slightly.

      There is a transition and I am now on my own at some sort of Japanese-looking castle. It's night-time but I can see the moon and everything looks bright and blue-ish. There are some sort of holographic security features. (This part of the dream vaguely reminded me of Starbound)

      Fragment:

      Just a small part of some other dream, I was in a town with some friends, not sure who. We just came out of a restaurant that was closing for the night and then two of us went one way, and I wondered where the third member was. I asked my friend, who only vaguely suggested the other might have gone looking for something.

      I remember wandering streets, there was a lot of light, from glowing signs and lampposts. I could see people sitting at cafes and so on.

      At some point we went into some shop and I wondered again about the missing friend. The friend that was with me was fascinated and excited by rediscovering some sort of cardboard packed plastic ketchup sachets.

      The next bit I remember, stuck in some sort of traffic at a four-way junction, with three lanes on each direction.



      Side notes:

      • The first dream was a bit more unusual as I haven't had many dreams that take place in space, even though I've played a lot of games that do.
      • The view-point changes were sort of frequent in the space dream and they felt a bit like they were made through a keyboard I couldn't quite feel. I suppose this sensation is quite similar to when I'm actually playing or writing something, where the keyboard sort of just becomes an extension of awareness, rather than existing as a physical obstacle, in a sense.
      • Most of these dream fragments I am getting lately are written quite a lot later from when I had the dreams, so it's a sign that recall is improving somewhat and I am also noticing more pre-lucid thoughts at a sort of "gut feeling" level, where I am not expressly thinking in spoken words but rather getting feelings or intuition about the dreams' content.

      Updated 01-30-2020 at 02:21 PM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , dream fragment , side notes
    9. A snippet...

      by , 01-20-2020 at 04:56 AM (Awake to take in the view...)
      I was in some sort of fancy restaurant, talking with a middle-aged lady. She was anti-vax (which is not cool) but she was also pretty attractive, so I had a hard time summoning the will to push back against her. She had a son named Cooper who was about my age. He had freckles. I was somewhat worried that I would get some weird disease from him. My allergies were really bad in this dream, too, and I was worried she was going to say "it's because you got vaccinated!" Lol. I've been in too many science Facebook groups lately I guess.
      Tags: lady, restaurant
      Categories
      non-lucid
    10. 4 Dec: Helping a friend confront her boss in London

      by , 12-04-2019 at 07:28 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      In London visiting a friend. On arrival I see 2 triple rainbows and I do my best to photograph it, but only catch the first one already fading. Many people are watching the phenomenon, halting their cars on the road, also taking pics. As I wonder looking for a better spot to take the best shot, I get lost to a very rich and high tech zone, where basically people live and work inside a huge compound. Cars even go inside and roads cross through these humongous building. Some people never even have to go out for anything. It is completely segregated from the outside world. I don't even know how I managed to got inside but I don't ever leave a secondary area, which is basically a technical service area and access to parking. Soon I find an exit and I am on my way to meet my friends. Zilla is already with our London friend and we go to the subway. My friend was summoned by her boss and she believes she is going to be fired. But she hates his guts, he has treated her very very abusively and she wants to defend herself and maybe tell him some truths she's been keeping to herself. And for that she asks for our backup.
      We are outside the door of his office, but we can hear their meeting as it goes and the dude is disgusting. She tries to defend herself but clearly he is determined to get rid of her and comes up with a lot of insults and shitty lying arguments. Then he becomes aggressive, calls her names and we can't take it anymore, so we barge in and I push him and slap him. He fights back so I beat the crap out of him. He says he is going to call the cops and present charges and say we assaulted him. But I am carrying a gun in my back pocket, not sure where I got it and I point it at him. I say we came with the intention to use it, but we were being nice and all, so I suggest he just calls it a day. He is panicking and promises not to tell a word if we just go. We go and my friend is like "are you crazy?" But very thankful. Later on, randomly, we see the same guy sitting at some diner and we notice that the server seems a bit crazy or is also taking revenge on him, so we observe the scene. He asks for pizza and a cake and she brings him frozen pizza and a frozen cake. He doesn't seem to understand that and he actually takes a bite of each. He yells mad and the girl doesn't flinch, she continues being a total disaster serving him, touching everything with her hands, spilling juice on him and making a mess. We guess she is actually doing it on purpose.
    11. 24 Aug: Rap competition at a bar, kissing my love

      by , 08-24-2019 at 09:48 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      At a foreign country attending some teachings. I feel a bit lost, but I meet some lady who seems nice to hang with. At lunch time I go to a place identical to one of the restaurants of a Mexican resort I have been, expecting to find lunch there. But I don't see any tables or people. This lady shows me there is a terrace on a lower level, where people actually are having lunch. She takes me to the buffet, but then we can't find a place to sit. She says she knows another nice place by the river. But it implies crossing a road with traffic and jumping over a tall fence, which forces us to climb first over a broken wall. But we manage. On the other side she takes us to a bar instead. Not what I expected and we continue not having a place to sit. But there are snacks and I eat standing. Meanwhile she grabs a cigar and starts smoking. I am starting to think she isn't exactly giving what I expected from her and maybe following her around was not a good idea. But in the process we tagged along two other cool guys, a middle eastern and a black dude.
      Then there is a rap competition on the bar and someone points out that we should listen to a certain asian lady with a guitar. She thinks she can rap but they assure us it will be a disaster. We listen and she really sucks. Not only she raps to a melody on the guitar but she kinda sings instead of just rapping and also very badly, so it doesn't make any sense. Meanwhile I notice my dad is there and so is her mother. I comment to my dad that even I can sing better than that and he agrees. Then the judges totally destroy her and also attack her mother for not having been truthful and telling her daughter she sucked. She says she thought she should always encourage her. The girl is confused, she really believes she is talented. In the end, the mother makes a sweet statement showing her unconditional support to her daughter and everybody cries, even my dad, but he leaves to hide the tears.
      Then my immortal beloved comes out of nowhere and is also there commenting the music. He takes me to another room, where we are alone. But he looks very cool and distant, just talking about musical technicalities. I don't understand what's up and I am completely fixated in his eyes, trying to read his real thoughts. He starts blushing and stuttering. I realize I broke the barrier. I take two steps towards him. Don't do anything besides being damn close to him and still fixated in his eyes. He tries to go back to a discursive thought but he can't. He just breaks down and leans to kiss me. It is magical how completely vulnerable and lost he appears to be. The kiss is the most realistic one I've experienced in my dreams with him so far.
    12. Monday, March 4

      by , 03-12-2019 at 03:18 AM
      I am working at Sherwin Williams. I think I have come back for just today. I think I’m going to just work today and use all my old info to clock in, etc, as if that’ll actually work. I’m thinking that the people still working here will remember me and remember that I left. I am in a sort of goofy, detached mood that has to do with me being back in a place that I willingly left. This place definitely doesn’t look like SW, but more like a movie theater or something similar. Everyone is gathering in a dim room with a stage or some other platform and fairly steep, tiered, red seats. Melissa’s dad is giving a speech or talking to everyone. I am walking in with Nathaniel Fuller? (He appears to be as he was when I knew him). He is in the lead and takes an aisle seat in the front row. I’m not sure whether I’m sitting with him or not, so I survey the seating. There’s an empty row, but I’m not sure if it’d be weird if I sat alone or not. I end up taking the seat between him and another (familiar?) guy. The seat seems small and I feel squished between the two. Now, (or maybe it was earlier?) I am walking around here. There’s a long hallway area and different inlets. I enter one and am in a grocery store. I felt like I was going to get lost or end up somewhere and not really know how to get back, and now it has happened. I see a chubby guy with shaggy hair and scruff pushing a shopping cart. It is full of liters of light colored soda. I think I try to find my way back. I am with Melissa and Brooke now, outside and by some small, enclosed ticket taking booth inside which sits a middle aged woman. We have some receipt (from Sherwin Williams?) that we’re trying to use to go to the restaurant or food place that the tickets are for. We don’t have the actual ticket, but I’m thinking that this receipt will show that we have permission. I could see where the lady would think we’re being fraudulent, but we’re not. When she talks to us, Brooke’s replies are kind of snarky, even though this lady let us through. She’s actually been pretty nice, and probably doesn’t care if we do get to go.




      I am in the living room at Dad’s. From my perspective, it looks like I could have just come in from the garage. I’ve walked into a scene of two police officers sitting on the floor and a large group of people standing around them. Dad may be here too, and I think the officers may be in plainclothes. They tell me they are here because of my social media rends/tendencies. I feel a pang of guilt in my stomach that is only amplified by the disappointed looks on every face. I am thinking that they’ve found me out and there’s nothing to do about it but accept it. I am slightly relieved when they tell me that they can’t do anything about it legally, But then I think that means the FBI has to get involved.
    13. 25 Feb: Dating Jaime, dangerous catterpillars, hostel stay

      by , 02-25-2019 at 09:11 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      Lunch or dinner with Jaime. He is a rich guy now. I meet him at top of a tower, we're supposed to go out to meet other couples at an Asian restaurant, but he stays behind to watch some fireworks from the tower. I go meet the other couples at the restaurant, because we are the hosts. We all need to choose our menu at the counter and then sit on designated places. Jaime is still not coming.

      Driving down a street with my cousins in the car. I see a line of processionary caterpillars at a garden and a little dog getting too close to them. I stop a bit further ahead and make a u-turn and go look for the dog to rescue him. Then I see a couple with children and that dog, sitting on the grass having a picnic. There is also other people around and the caterpillars are moving on the grass between them and no one is noticing. I ask for their attention. The guy from the couple turns to me in anger and reveals a demonic face. Scares me for a second but them he calms down and listens to me. I ask if they know about this caterpillars and how dangerous they are, they don't, I explain and everyone freaks out. Some boy says they are piling up and he covers them in paper or plastic and sets them on fire. I turn away as the animals shriek in agony, but I tell myself it had to be done.
      Then I leave. I am staying with school colleagues at some type of hostel. First nothing seems to work, the whole place is in the dark, but I find the main board with the switches and turn it on. Don't understand why nobody did it before me, the guys are a bit embarrassed.
      I check where is my bed, we are staying in mixed shared rooms and I find out I will be sharing my bunk with Jaime. I leave a note on his bed just saying hi, because he hasn't arrived yet and then go out. At lunch time I meet with some friends and they ask me what I have done to my hair. I don't know and look in a mirror. I have bangs and short hair and I think I look pretty cute. Later my dad and some others are visiting me and he brings Bernardo. Outside I hear some dogs growling and I go check. I think one of them is Faial who belongs to Jaime. I worry about him coming in with his big dog because of Bernardo, but actually Faial is growling to bring attention to another street dog who seems injured and afraid. Some people step in to help the dog.
    14. Saturday, February 23

      by , 02-24-2019 at 12:15 AM
      I am in a restaurant with Melissa and I think some others. It seems fairly crowded and a tiny bit cramped. Melissa asks me something like ‘is that her?’, referencing a girl at the table across from us. The table is against the wood paneled wall and full with at least four people. I think Melissa is asking if it’s Reilly. The table is slightly behind me, so I have to covertly turn my head to get a glance. The girl looks fairly similar to Reilly, but seems thicker, more made up, with curlier hair. The group seems to find something funny or amusing; it seems like they are quietly laughing. They also seem to be looking over here, possibly what is causing the giggling. I now get up to go use the bathroom and to get a better look on my way. In the bathroom, I start using the urinal, which is short, low to the ground, and a stainless steel trough style.
    15. Saturday, February 9

      by , 02-17-2019 at 12:38 AM
      I am walking up to a restaurant with Mom and Makayla. It is dim or dark outside. I think this place is Italian. We’re greeted by a hostess at a table on a little covered section outside the place. She seems sort of somber and then ends up telling Mom something like ‘sorry about Catholic Charities’. I think she is going to relay to the manager that we’re here. We walk in, passing all the tables, and end up in a large back room. It seems like it’s more for staff. There are a few giant pizzas and large portions of side dishes set out on table clothed tables. Some employees are casually coming and going while we’re in here, so casual that I hear one cuss. I now grab some food. I go back for some mac ‘n’ cheese, the underside of which is badly burnt, a black crisp. I think it still tastes fine. There is a subdued sense of excitement that this is going to be comped because they actually care what happened with Catholic Charities.
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