All DJ Entries

Morning of November 6, 1996. Wednesday.



I opened one of my journals randomly and noticed that it included the usual instance of precognition (of which I did not always record in detail as it was too common - in fact, there were days when it was almost continuous on a conscious level, but spontaneous and usually impersonal).

I have that November 6th (Wednesday) in 1996 was a “good day” but had recorded a strangely negative dream of being a homeless person; an “old drunk”, I think (which is about as far from my real nature as conceivably possible) of a completely different background (white Australian, I think), and being yelled at by a Korean woman from a nearby church mission. I do not understand what she is saying. I am mostly sleeping on the sidewalks in a larger city - not exactly sure where, perhaps Sydney. There was no reason for me to have dreamt this.

On the next day, Thursday, November 7, 1996 - I had gotten a completely unexpected missionary-type letter from a Korean church. We had not gotten any other letters of this nature and we had not been living there at that address that long. Normally, though, precognition of this particular nature unfolds within the same day, often an hour or two after waking. Similar events have happened often before throughout my life, sometimes involving me taking on the odd emotions and ideas of a letter or cassette tape I had not gotten yet and did not know was on its way. In one case, I actually found myself inexplicably yelling about something (I did not even seem to be “me” at all in mood) when I lived in Wisconsin and some of the exact phrases I used were on a cassette tape an adopted sister (A Snowbird, from California) sent me that I had no idea she recorded - from a disillusioned male (relating to Native American rights) talking who I did not even know and regarding some of the same detailed unusual events. Events like this have happened continuously throughout my life, both picking up on someone before I knew of them (even “unwillingly” projecting their mood), and some sort of remote viewing from an unknown consciousness that seemed a part of me - usually with exact details of an “already known memory” of what I could not have possibly known.

Morning of March 4, 1991. Monday.



It seems to be morning. I had gotten up and gone to the back room of the Loomis Street house, I think to get something from the second refrigerator. I am distracted by a large dresser that faces out from the east wall near the doorway (which was never there in real life and this location of the dresser would not be possible in reality as it would have blocked the doorway).

Looking in the mirror, I see my lifelong dream girl in perfect detail (the most attractive female I had ever seen though I had always assumed her to be fictional), as if she is implied to be my own reflection, though lower in the mirror than my own head would actually be. She smiles intensely and seems to radiate an “I found you” triumphant visage. I look at her for a considerable time and feel slightly puzzled, yet I do not realize how “impossible” it is to see someone else’s reflection in a mirror other than your own.

---

Zsuzsanna first wrote to me on March 16th, 1991. There are hundreds of completely unexplainable events relating to my dream girl. Needless to say, this has completely changed my view of humanity and of life itself.

---

---

Morning of February 17, 1991. Sunday.



I consider this dream precognitive due to its vivid and personal nature regarding upcoming contact with my future wife a short time before my first highly unlikely and unexpected communication with her in real life. It had the very similar mood and awareness found in my more personally precognitive dreams and the extra layer of focus.

I have absolutely no doubt that this dream (of many others) somehow “announced” my upcoming contact and partnership with my soulmate (lifelong “mystery girl”). I would have to be extremely shortsighted (as well as wholly ignorant of my own consciousness and previous experiences) to see it differently. I would like to be clear that the opinions of skeptics mean nothing to me.

In my dream, I am back in Cubitis (Florida) on the south side of the front section of the shed. Oddly though, at the same time, I seem to be doing some gardening for sister Marilyn at her house in Wisconsin. Over time, I pull up several larger weeds.

Eventually, I find a stubborn “root” which I believe to be that of a larger plant somewhere in the area, perhaps even a tree or at least a shrub. When I pull on it, it turns out to be an electrical cord and an old antique lamp (similar to one my sister had in real life) emerges from the ground, entangled in actual roots. I feel a vivid sense of wonder and awe that is very hard to describe.

The lamp has two figures on the base, a presumed married couple effigy, but very old-fashioned (possibly 1700s); a dark-haired woman in a wedding dress and her partner. There is a very unusual emotion as if it is an important discovery and that the man may somehow be “me”. It seems very personal and significant. I am thinking about whether or not the lamp will still work after being buried in the ground for so long.

Optimized 2 minute 30 second read.

Saturday morning, 9 February 1991.

Time Gate (fascinating and life-changing outcome)

Dream # 8,818-01.




Exactly three years after this dream, I arrived in Australia to meet with my real-world "dream girl."

The beginning of my dream involves me becoming aware of the "sugar shack"/"old shack" dreams I had as a child that also had several inexplicable outcomes. In this case, the real-world Arcadia post office and the "sugar shack" imply the essence of a single location.

The area is unlike waking life. It is more like an open field as I walk to the west. Despite the incorrect nature of the setting, I am near the Arcadia post office. I come to an area that reminds me of the isolated trellis I had deliberately used to leave the dream state many years previously. A large metal green fence seems to divide a mix of previous times from the present. I experience a vivid sense of timelessness. A mammoth, tyrannosaurus, and deer are all from different eras, but their life energy is intense and present.

Behind the fence, I see a "realistic" growling tyrannosaurus and a grunting woolly mammoth as my dream becomes more vivid. There is a woman in black (a young Barbara Steele or the "mystery girl" or a mix of both), prehistoric deer and goats, emus, ornithomimosaurs, and various small animals.

There are also a few robots in the "Magnus Robot Fighter" comic book's style. ("Magnus" is the name of the main character in "The Bermuda Depths" and the brand name of an electric organ that I often played when younger.)

I have a vivid impression that something inexplicable is impending. I consider that part of the northern end of the "time gate" may be attached to the post office. I find a room resembling part of the King Street house - my L-shaped apartment (before I lived there in waking life).

Susan R, a classmate, seems to be on a safari and exits a jeep with others and squats to study footprints.

I hear a sudden stampede influenced by the Tasmanian Devil cartoons (where the animals run from him). Even so, it is far more realistic as I watch animals rush by the window, leaving a large dust cloud. The noise is incredible. I get a sense of being in Australia (where I had never been at that point) even though the setting is in Florida. The stampede means the "time gate" had been opened. I say, "Oh-oh." An unknown witness responds with "What?" as I again say, "Oh-oh." The post office building shakes.

I go to the front entrance of the post office, wondering if the animals will destroy the building and if I will be safer somewhere else. I walk outside, and it now seems to be a quiet, sunny day. However, I turn around as a giant dove approaches me. It slowly walks from the building. It has a red heart symbol on its chest. I hold a burning sword, but I wake before anything else occurs.

The dove from the post office reminds me of the American postage stamps featuring doves and heart symbols.

As a boy, I was intrigued by coincidental patterns that emerged from different letter arrangements. A next-consonant, next-vowel continuity from JESUS is KITAT, LOVEV. When I tried it with my first and middle name, I got CLAUDECLARENCE, DMEAFIDMESIPDI, FNIEGOFNITOQFO, GPOIHUGPOVURGU, which I decided "might be" GPO I HUG PO VIRGO.

After this dream (in March of the same year), Zsuzsanna and I communicated for the first time in waking life. We started regularly writing letters and talking on the telephone.

Zsuzsanna is a Virgo, but I have zero interest or belief in astrology, tarot, or any other nonsensical system. (As a boy, I learned systems like astrology and tarot were wrong beyond the laws of chance, which I found odd.)

The Postal Service issued its Love stamp booklet on Valentine's Day, February 1994, the year that Zsuzsanna and I married.

I have recently recognized that the front fence of our home (same design with metal vertical bars) is a “miniature version” of the “time gate” of my dream. (The owner added the fence years after we moved here.)

The birthplace of Zsuzsanna's mother is the antipode of the Arcadia post office. It is also antipodal to my place of birth (Punta Gorda).

I was always puzzled (as a child) by how much a rotated Australia resembled North America - as if it was "on purpose."

It is important to understand that our new fence appeared LONG AFTER my original image for this dream report.

---

Morning of December 16, 1990. Sunday.



I am in the northern side yard in Cubitis, in the exact same spot as several dreams of the past which were of certain significance. I sense it is early morning, perhaps around eight o'clock, and there is a light mist about a foot high in some areas, including near the foundation of the shed. The green-eyed, dark-haired “mystery girl” with the unusual mixed Hungarian Roma (gypsy) and Australian accent, as vivid as ever, seems to be playing some sort of game, pretending we are in a “fall over and die” childhood game even though she seems about twenty years old. I perceive myself as “Little Red Feather”, the name I gave to a toy I was given in Wisconsin from Evelyn W. (She said I could pick out any toy to keep and I selected a Native American figure that was on his knee while aiming a bow and arrow.)

I fall down and roll over on the lawn automatically, seeing her tower above me with a look of victory (she primarily faces southeast at this point) yet soon with an amazing smile. I feel very weak though not threatened even though she seems to be thinking “I’ve got you now”. She is almost goddess-like and does not seem to have negative intent. I am trying to work out the scenario and its implications but I cannot move as I would like. I sense others around (mostly to the west, past the carport) but they are vague compared to her. I do not even realize that I had not been in this location in real life since summer of 1978. (I do have a vague memory of living in Wisconsin but the thought does not trigger any significant sense of where I actually am in reality.) Although there were numerous other more vivid dreams during this time period featuring this “imaginary” girl (again, the same one since early childhood), this one stands out as being one of the key dream scenarios that finally made the impact…especially as she turned out to be a real person.

---

Zsuzsanna had an imaginary friend called “Little Red Feather” that she used to play this game with as a child. She had remote viewed my life all her life (which has been validated in virtually countless ways - and it still occurs continuously on a day to day basis).

---

Morning of November 10, 1990. Saturday.



This particular prophetic dream revealed the actual uncommon surname of my soulmate (twin flame) and wife-to-be, who first contacted me in March of 1991; about four months after this dream. That surname was Horvath. On the television series “One Day at a Time” (1975–1984), Mackenzie Phillips played the character Julie Cooper Horvath. I was not a fan of hers (and did not find her attractive), and this is my only clearer dream about her as far as I know. The tennis court in this particular case is likely related to a play on “love” as well as courtship and marriage. We were the only characters in my dream and seemingly isolated.

In my dream, I had been playing a tennis match with Mackenzie Phillips. I am not sure of the location. It could be Florida, Wisconsin, or even California (or some sort of implied composite). I am eventually wandering through the tennis court somewhat randomly after something apparently interrupts our tennis game (such as a bottle or a rock being thrown onto the court, I think, though I am not directly aware of any other people at any point). I soon notice that she is gone or had disrespectfully (in the opinion of my dream-self) wandered off but we still have a game to finish. I spend the rest of my dream going around screaming her first name over and over, getting louder and louder, walking in a kind of zigzag pattern “MaKEEEEEHnzie! MaKEEEEEHnzie!” (possibly also a play on “I can’t see”?). I feel tense, irritated, and even abandoned. It almost seems like we are married and she had deserted me. Everything starts to turn into a mist. I get the impression that all of the other people disappeared (even though Mackenzie was the only other person I was aware of). All of the world is fading, very slowly and frustratingly (not a typical way to wake from a dream). I awake with a mild headache, seemingly having slept too long.

Morning of October 8, 1990. Monday.



Three different postal addresses represented (over time) my childhood home in Cubitis in reality. There was was the original “General Delivery” where you claimed your mail at the post office by name only, without any identification. It was a small town, so I guess people trusted each other for the most part, although it was probably more realistic to say you were known by all (to a point). After this, we had “PO Box 29” at the post office. Finally, it was “Rural Route 4 Box 504”, established by a mailbox across the highway in front of Karen and Kenny’s house. I am “sorting” these memories out in my mind and moving into a different “realm” - “living in Cubitis in-dream” even though I was living in La Crosse at this time.

Finally I settle on some sort of “new” connection with Brenda W. I had not seen her in reality since 1977. This was before I had done extensive dream work and discovered overwhelming evidence that Brenda W was, since early childhood, a “stand-in” archetype for my real wife-to-be, who was also typically represented by an implied tulpa or “imaginary girlfriend” (with every single unlikely aspect matching my wife-to-be exactly including the mixed Magyarorszagi Romak and Australian accent and heritage - the only girl I have ever directly known with this mix - though I am sure there are many others in the world). I am not entirely sure why Brenda W was “selected” (by who knows what forces in the universe) to be the “stand-in”. There was not that much of a resemblance, really, other than dark, somewhat curly hair and a loose association (on Brenda’s part) with Roma (or Hungarian gypsy) culture. Brenda was not Roma.

There is a lot to consider - and it is a challenge to augment one’s attention towards several thousand dreams of a particular nature. Ever since I broke through into my realization of the “paranormal” (for lack of a better or more suitable term) nature of my life since birth with far more remote viewing and precognitive perspectives (eventually, even while awake) than not (as well as the continuous meaningful synchronicity), it has put me into a rather “unusual” life path (by typical mainstream perspective only - I no longer seriously associate the unexplained as unusual) as well as in regard to my continuous bafflement with humanity itself (which I consider far more unexplainable than the so-called paranormal). Before the “Blue Sun” dream, I could still ponder if Brenda had become a stand-in for my “imaginary” wife-to-be (that was validated to be real about six months from this dream) due to a (lesser or forgotten) conscious choice - simply to “fill the gap”. My “mystery girl” however, turned out to be real.

In my dream, there is one scene where I see an adult Brenda W (or who I assume to be her as I had never seen her as an older adult) at the end of a checkout at Tinsley’s IGA. She smiles at me and I am aware that she is a poet and that we are apparently crossing paths again for whatever reason. (Brenda never really wrote poetry, though my wife is a published poet.) There are remembered lines in my own unfolding in-dream poem (not in any competition with her poetry but more like some sort of ode), one being “like blue lightning from your fingertips” which is directly relevant to Brenda somehow, seemingly related to her emotions and my memory. Reflecting on this line from the (fictional) poem seems to resonate with the real-life memory of when we played around with static electricity where you shuffle along and then touch someone to create the larger bolt of static “lightning” which more often than not is slightly painful. In my dreams, this effect came to be far more pronounced and was not painful and at times seemed more related to spirituality, even healing, than solely a physical effect.

In the last scene of my dream, I walk out into my backyard in Cubitis and notice a huge blue sun in the sky, to the east. In this particular dream, it is several times bigger than the real sun (though it is not implied to be hotter in-dream). It seems almost like a dominant spiritual force and “blessing” of some kind from the universe itself and I feel very enriched and optimistic at this point. I seem to be the only one around at the time. I wake in near-ecstasy with the “blue sun” pulsating in my left eye - and I still see it to this day, usually only when awake and more alert, and it always brings an astoundingly peaceful essence. (Other people who have experienced this call it the “blue dot”, Blue Pearl, or “blue angel” though I now see it as the primary foundation of the Merkaba, which eventually begins to rotate in a cone shape.)

This had interesting real-life continuity, though there were a number of other dreams that far more clearly defined what was coming in my life to an extent that was far more dominant than most earlier experiences (other than perhaps M’s death). I eventually learned the “mystery girl” aka “imaginary girl” was a real person and she became my wife, first making contact in March 1991.

After my blue sun dream, and without having mentioned it, my brother-in-law Bob looked startled in the living room one day, claiming he saw a “blue flame” around my head and shoulders. This is especially curious since he had never said anything remotely like that in the past - and in addition - he could not have known of my dream, and there is also the fact that he never had the slightest interest in unexplained events or cared anything at all about dreams prior to that. His life was mostly factory work, television, and fishing, and little else - and he also could not read.

Again, to this day, I still see the “blue sun” when awake, in the left field of my vision. Sometimes it is bright enough to “cancel” my real sight (and leave a whitish afterglow), but more often it is like a fleeting single blue “pulse” about the size of a star (though does sometimes repeat a few times at various “distances” and “magnitudes”) - it always brings a blissful sensation and has never been connected with anything negative. It seems directly related to some forms of telepathy and precognitive awareness. Again, I have learned that other people have experienced this, all with similar associations, and I have grown to call it “The Blue Pearl” as some others have.

As written of before, its first main appearance was as a “blue flame” around Susan R, but this was mostly an isolated event. This was the dream where I “went off with Brenda W instead - to the east”. It does seem part of the “eternity bridge” association I had recently written extensively on. In the long run, it seems to be linked with a “higher dimension” that many are not aware of. The two more “extreme” experiences with it while awake was one where it transformed into two somewhat pyramidic “blue tornadoes” (one inverted over the other and turning in the opposite direction, curiously demonstrating the Coriolis effect and the fact my wife and I grew up in opposite hemispheres by both north/south and east/west references) and the other was like suddenly seeing a “giant paramecium” with the hypnopompic-like tank-tread effect - which was the “closest” it had ever been.

Seeing this light or “flash” is not like seeing something in front of me. It is, in fact, like seeing a reflection of something that is behind me or more specifically within my mind in the reversed holographic reflection of the environment. The “blue tornadoes” event was seemingly triggered by just touching my wife on the arm. The essence of the Source is a true mystery - something that has remained primarily unchanged and which others have noted, though I still cannot say what the mechanism behind it is.

Morning of September 18, 1990. Tuesday.



In my dream, I am apparently in the (theoretical) future, which seems to be not that long after major changes in society. There is not much drama or many events worthy of note, but my dream’s more vivid parts suggest at least some people becoming some sort of powder, like a “pillar of salt” in the Biblical sense except that it is not salt but seemingly some sort of toxic powder (perhaps rat poison). Two figures are seemingly in a basement, possibly on display, though they may only be unlikely remains (additionally covered with white dust from a building collapsing) based on the unclear “back story” of my dream. They are a man and a woman, possibly a married couple (still in their wedding clothes).

There is a point at where a plane is flying overhead while I am in a basement or lower level of a larger building. I get the impression that there is some sort of threat or possibility of attack by another country and that some buildings had fallen or had been hit by airplanes about a week previously. There is also something about powder being “sent” to people somehow, though I am still not certain of how the people became (or are covered by) the light powder.

Don Knotts, as he appeared in the movie “The Reluctant Astronaut” (from 1967) steps through the doorway. He is seemingly one of the only other people in the city (Manhattan). He seems to have been hiding in the buildings on his own for possibly a week or more.

“Can’t be…” he says softly, seemingly looking at me and seeming very nervous on hearing the sound of the plane. More loudly and clearly, he says “There aren’t any airplanes anymore.” (This likely but loosely relates to his role in the aforementioned movie in that he always avoided travel by plane.) Only at that point do I start to suspect that I am dreaming about some sort of science-fiction theme, though Don seemed very sincere and truthful in what he was saying.

---

This dream seemed to be somewhat precognitive of 9-11 and the anthrax attacks as well as my upcoming marriage (man and woman in white; not yet moving), although there were many other precognitive ones around this same time period involving my lifelong Roma “mystery girl” (who first contacted me in March of 1991) and a number of exact details. The anthrax attacks apparently began on September 18, 2000.

---

I explain this dream type further in “Dreams of Type PRECONAV-VSCPCEL, 01-15”.

---

Night of September 13, 1990. Thursday.



This was a partly recurring dream a few months prior to making first contact with my lovely wife-to-be.

The world is ending. Or is it only a play/movie from the mind of Ödön von Horváth? (who I had read of at the library, based on an earlier dream). There is supposedly a true story (at least possibly true relative to the quote if not the event itself) - Ödön von Horváth was once walking in the Bavarian Alps when he discovered the skeleton of a long dead man with his knapsack still intact. Von Horváth opened the knapsack and found a postcard reading “Having a wonderful time”. Asked by friends what he did with it, von Horváth replied “I posted it”.

No, the world really is ending, apparently. There is a fire that is consuming the world. It is a fire containing the souls of all of the people who had died under Hitler - or so this seems, as some sort of epic movie-like plot. Their shadows move (walking about) within the fire as it spreads across the planet. It reminds me vaguely of certain concepts from “The Fog” from 1980. Though it has been a common theme since earliest memory to attempt escape from something by going around the world away from it, in as straight a direction as possible, and sometimes back from the other side, this particular scenario is new and unique to this dream series.

For some reason, they are moving in the United States towards Wisconsin (from the west), where I am living at the time of my dream. There is great awe and fear near the seeming opening of my dream, although not quite nightmarish. Also, for some strange reason, only my brother Dennis and I are actively planning to get out in time.

There seems to be enough time to get away at first. They seem about two blocks west of where I am living (but the fire stretches north to south, as far as the eye can see in both directions).

My brother and I get on our bicycles to leave. We start to ride south (not really away from the fire, but parallel to it for some reason).

Suddenly, as we are riding our bicycles, with knapsacks as well as a bit in the back bicycle baskets (I am even aware of the “Having a wonderful time” postcard in his knapsack), my brother somehow immediately has a glass of water which he throws in my face from his left hand (while still steering the bicycle with his right hand). As it splashes my face, I become much more aware and my dream more vivid, but still not fully aware that I am dreaming. This, in turn, causes me to think a little more clearly…why in the world am I riding with my half-brother who has a swastika tattoo on his hand? Wouldn’t that “attract” the supposed entities in the fire in a negative sense? However, at the same time, I get the strange impression I am “leaving” my girlfriend (”mystery girl”) or wife and am starting to question the nature of the setting.

We come to an area on the south-side of La Crosse where there has been some sort of earthquake damage. It is too hard to ride a bicycle there, so I get off and walk. There are “brittle” burned plants everywhere even though the main fire is still behind us.

I turn and look at the fire, which is about as high as a five-storey building. One of the “souls” in the fire is female and now seems quite alive and passionate, seemingly having spent her lifetime looking for me as I, her. I stop and decide to become a part of something I could not possibly have “escaped” from, anyway.

Then it seems that I got it all wrong. These people were not the “ghosts” of those who died under Hitler, but the energies of spirits looking for their partners in life or “twin flames”. Fire is life. Ashes are death. Should I tell the world that there was nothing to fear after all? I wake…

Night of August 15, 1990. Wednesday.



Prior to contacting my wife-to-be for the very first time in waking reality, I had a very vivid dream of two comets orbiting each other in a very close spiral pattern and becoming the Yin Yang symbol for a time. The feeling of Fall/Autumn seems slightly enhanced. The pattern of the two “comets” eventually turned into a Paisley design after moving apart again. I am also aware of one-half of the Yin-Yang symbol floating out over the ocean (seemingly from another country far away), like a sort of intelligently guided swirl - and I feel a sense of peace. It moves in a circle, but at times becomes comet-like again - leaving a trail of subtle sparks and brilliant wavy lines.

After several minutes, the swirling light becomes of human form and “lands” on the shore, near the ocean. (The original objects appeared to come to me from the south.)

It turned into a girl named Amelia (wearing a Paisley dress) possibly of about seven to nine years of age (no older than twelve), standing on rocks a bit out from the shore. I “knew” she was my future daughter Amelia (in complete contrast to when my “mystery girl”, that is, Zsuzsanna, appeared in a dream). She is seemingly wearing an old-fashioned dress with a blue and gold flower design.

There is also a curious feeling of peace and assurance that seems to be coming from some sort of “superior force” (of nature?).

The Paisley design represents another subtle form of the Yin Yang symbol for me. This was a fairly common “pre-anniversary” dream, where the date prior to the precognitive link matches (in this case, my real daughter’s birthday). My wife-to-be, without any clues or cues from me, told me that she liked the name “Amelia” and thus we decided on this as a first name before we even met.

Morning of January 7, 1990. Sunday. (This is a new online concise and clarified version Monday, 7 December 2015.)



In my dream, I am in La Crosse, Wisconsin, but the area seems different, even seemingly near the ocean at one point - or at least the Mississippi seems bigger and more dominant a feature of the region. Water is rising over a long bridge in one clearer event. It seems the whole region is threatened by rising flood waters that are somewhat “relentless” in that the forces almost seem “intelligent” (in a human or near-human sense) or possibly controlled by a malevolent force of some kind. There is an eerie mood in my dream and I and several others are always moving away from areas that become flooded, almost as if the waters are somehow deliberately “in pursuit” of us. It mostly seems nighttime throughout my dream.

We end up going down into a basement-like area that also serves as a post office, the layout seeming like a composite of Arcadia’s post office and the main one in La Crosse. The flood waters are raging and come down the steps (vaguely reminiscent of a scene from “The Blob” from 1958) with a human-like vengeance. At this point, I am becoming more frustrated than afraid. I stop and make my stand and boldly ask the raging flood waters that threaten to fill the post-office/basement area “What about the children?”

The stream of raging water moves up and back almost like a hand (as if about to slap someone, but also in a sort of odd “puzzlement” at my audacity) and then moves back up the steps literally in reverse (as if playing a film clip of water cascading down the stairs in reverse). A little later, I and the others exit the building and look around, noting that the flood waters have receded, leaving only a few puddles here and there in the mostly featureless landscape. More light and detail is coming in at this point, as the sun also seems to be rising.

The silhouette of a religious statue, which seems to be Jesus Christ, can be seen to the south. A dark-haired female (my lifelong green-eyed “mystery girl”) approaches it and it begins to glow (with a bluish tinge) and come to life as I wake, with several other people then encircling it. I hear clearer music in my dream that I did not hear in reality until my wife sent it on a cassette tape (the same melody and overall sound as Enya’s “Shepard Moons”, which was not even released until November 4, 1991 in the UK).

Familiar meanings:

This dream curiously contains five different waking process mechanisms during the same time period:

1. A bridge being blocked (disallowing the dream self to move further into the dream state or incidentally explore another region of thought).

2. Flood waters getting lower (waking process metaphor to indicate less of the Source is present and available as the conscious self is reintegrated). Flood waters are energies of both the Source and lower levels of human collective consciousness (including other dreamers during the same time period), even more obvious here, as I eventually became aware that the flood waters were an aspect of the energies of seemingly human consciousness as well as an aspect of the Source, though seemingly angry.

3. A threat to run from (to more efficiently instigate the dissolution of the dream and annihilate the particular incarnation of the dream self).

4. A statue coming to life (metaphorical for the conscious self waking up from the dream, or in some cases, coming into clearer awareness within the dream). The fact that it was Jesus Christ (though I am not a Christian) was more information on my lifelong dark-haired mystery girl being closer to my path in the sense of a spiritual awakening.

5. The sun rising and light coming in (metaphorical for the conscious self waking up from the dream as well as conscious logic and analytical skills becoming more prominent during this stage)

Precognitive links and additional notes:

This dream demonstrates typical “pre-anniversary” precognition (my oldest son being born on January 7, 1995). It also (“against all odds“) prepared me for what was to come.

The post office has been an important setting throughout my life (and represents communication with the Source, especially as a basement also represents being closer to the Source as well as collective consciousness - including the implication of being deeper in the dream state), especially relating to how I would come into contact with my predestined (for lack of a better term) dream girl. This goes all the way back to dreaming as a child of the PAIA having a meeting in the Arcadia Post Office while seated in a circle on the floor near the main counter (this in turn relative to the newspaper where my wife’s mother placed the advertisement that captured my attention as I had dreamt of the situation just previously in opening the gate to my dream girl) before the group even existed in real life. Even so, “I hug PO Virgo” is implied as a pattern (next vowel, next consonant continuity) in my full name, PO standing for Post Office (though Virgo being only one of thousands of “clues” from the Source, not relevant to astrology, which has no meaning for me).

This event from the 1980s was just one more experience that all but abolished my faith in human credibility (as to why most people remain in denial regarding the paranormal, which, as I have stated, I consider more bizarre than the paranormal itself - or perhaps “paranormal” is not the right word in this case as it covers many things regarding the “unexplained” - many people seemingly completely lack the ability to either accept or relate to it - which seems overly “wrong” somehow, especially at my age now).

In the morning of this day, I continue to have false awakenings from a few dreams and am focused on a section of the east wall of my King Street apartment when I lived in the smaller L-shaped room where the pinhead’s closet had a blocked-off doorway westerly to my room. There was a strange, shiny part of the wall whereby there were very odd shadowy figures I couldn’t quite account for. It gave the impression of both miniature demonic human-like forms and wayward fairies. The vividness of this perception was astounding. I couldn’t work out what I was looking at and later thought the dream was related to some sort of implied portal in the wall. Still, it created the impression of a reflection from somewhere else, and there was also a sort of reddish hue in some areas. The detail was quite precise and did not change in orientation. This was the only time to that point that I had such a vivid dream of focusing on the east wall and seeing the weird shiny seeming reflection from elsewhere. It almost reminded me of Hot Stuff the devil in an enchanted forest scene with a plane flying above.

That evening, in real life, I walked to the north-side of La Crosse. I stopped at sister Marilyn’s house. She wanted me to get something for her at the store, so I walked north, then west down Gillette Street. It was the night that the garbage was set out on the boulevards. I passed near a house a few houses east from the IGA store (“Skogen’s” at the time) and noticed an object sitting freely atop the garbage can on a smaller box. Looking at it, in the dark, I saw it was a Pink Floyd “The Wall” mirror, which I had never seen one of before. I decided to take it home, as it was in seeming good condition.

The next morning - you guessed it - the dream repeated - except it wasn’t a dream this time. I had absentmindedly placed the mirror on my desk near the south window whereby the reflection on the wall was identical to the precognitive dream of the day before. This really baffled me, even considering the thousands of similar experiences I had already had. It almost made me feel “dislocated in time”. Included here is the photo of the same mirror as what I had.

As usual, about paranormal dreams with validated follow-ups such as this, there are several layers, with at least one layer being almost like a “cosmic jester” at work. In this case, it was related directly to the wall in my apartment as well as the movie “The Wall” (that I hadn’t even seen). In addition to visually exact precognition (which couldn’t possibly be coincidental in any way), there was the additional feeling of remote-viewing, yet somehow “displaced” in time - yet another variation of the unexplained.

One more thing - I didn’t like the song “The Wall” at all (in fact disliked it quite a bit and often made fun of it), because they sang “We don’t need no education” - which implied that they did need education - because they were using a double negative…

Night of November 5, 1984. Monday. (To morning of November 6.)



As some of this one facet of a small part of my lifelong “story” involves hundreds of pages, I will include only basic information here, and a copy of Zsuzsanna’s journal page from when she was much younger and written long before we made real contact (though at the time of this dream). There are many more entries both already online and not yet posted anywhere that add hundreds more unexplainable layers that prove (for me) dreams are often a composite of precognition and remote viewing and there is absolutely no one that could convince me otherwise, especially twenty years on in a blissful, sensuous and spiritual marriage and with healthy children (though I do understand how there are deceitful people that, for whatever reason, are somehow against marriage and family and who sadly deny love itself - you the reader have likely seen it yourself many times - they are very good at pretending and creating fabricated drama).

There were earlier “prototypes” and precursors for this dream, and there were many that implied the eventual “battle” between Susan R and the “mystery girl”, this still being years before it was confirmed that hundreds of my childhood dreams implemented more precise precognition and remote viewing, which has turned out for me to be what dreams mainly are. The “mystery girl” dreams were all precognitive; they not only “introduced” me to my soulmate before she was born, they revealed every minute detail from the unlikely accent and cultural mix, to birthplace (exactly inverted to my birth place) from directly across the ocean (as shown in other entries).

Before the Blue Pearl (or “blue flame” or Merkaba) was more dominant in my perception, I saw it in Susan R. My first dream where I “ended up” with the “mystery girl” in an implied marriage would not be accepted as truth by most, due to it having elements of maturity for me at the age of eight (I am never in a mood to debate so I will not go into it). It was validated many times that Brenda W was the wife-to-be “stand-in”, which was validated again in 1991 just prior to real contact with my wife-to-be (and involving the “blue sun”).

My main castle dream implied a battle between Susan R and the “mystery girl” (who looked exactly like my wife-to-be in every way and with the same mixed heritage and same intriguing mixed Romani/Hungarian/Australian accent). The castle was implied to be beyond the area (at the end of the hanging bridge) where the “Bridge Over a Prehistoric World” dream took place - which started with watching Susan R (a transparent “blue egg” around her) leave me and ended with me hugging my wife-to-be archetype. The castle exists high in the sky, on a floating small hill, but only of partial land area, with plant roots hanging down from underneath. It seems to be “another realm” with a different “speed” of time (hard to explain). I get the clear impression that the castle stays only in areas where night exists.

The castle also has areas of temple-like rooms as well as oddly modern neon lights in some areas (almost like a discotheque). It is very vivid. Some lights are too bright to directly look at. I do look over the edge of the floating hill at one point, and see the view as if from an airplane flying very high; I see the lights of a larger city far below, barely perceptible at times. Susan R seems oddly upset at looking at her own reflection (though I eventually discover that is not what she is looking at in the mirror). She frustratingly yells “get out” at the mirror, which seems odd to me though reminds me strongly of the scene from “Fear No Evil”, first seen March 3, 1969.

My mental “connection” to Susan is broken (there were events prior to this which I do not recall). The “mystery girl”, wearing a black dress and a diamond necklace and some sort of unusual swept-back “crown”, emerges from the mirror, quite royal-looking, with glowing green catlike eyes and quite precise, sensual motions. I am amazed by her beauty. It is her. “Queen of the Gypsies”. Well, at least a dazzling princess. Orange-tinted skin. I even detect a trace of Aboriginal Australian.

From here, the two girls fight in an epic battle of screeching voices and incredibly intense and eerie screeching wind. They are arguing about me, my purpose, my birth, where I should live, and who I “belong to”. I believe the “mystery girl” is “screeching” and “whistling” the loudest and affirming that I am hers. It is very strange to hear this - like the wind itself “arguing” with itself, like lightning bolts “wriggling” against each other, like clouds trying to “strangle” each other. The Merkaba appears to be spinning out of control for a time sort of knocking into each girl’s silhouette for a time. The voices reach a point where they are not human-sounding at all in any way.

One of them falls to the ground far below, eventually, but I am not sure who; I only see her silhouette falling, back first with arms out. I think I have had enough commotion, so I turn to leave…almost finding my way out before someone behind me asks “Where are you going? You cannot go alone”. I am not alarmed but I do not see her directly. I only see her shadow on the wall. I wake.

This “battle” and long-term outcome (as some already know) could not have taken place solely within my own dreams, but could only have happened in a collective sense (in the supraconscious perhaps) or “another plane” of reality. There have been a number of dreams where I eventually was absolutely sure of this and there is not the slightest evidence to the contrary. What is also interesting is that my wife also loosely describes the Barbara Steele movie I was fascinated by as a young child and it remains a favorite movie (1964’s “Danse Macabre” aka “Castle of Blood” aka “Castle of Terror”) yet she had never heard of it or seen it. In a way, this dream is actually a “replay” of some aspects of it.

There were other dreams involving Susan R and the “mystery girl” (wife-to-be) within the same setting or relative to one event or another. I do not know the dynamics behind this, as I had never contacted Susan after high school. (In fact, she is the only one I have never been able to contact or find out more about out of all my classmates through all school years. I did hear she was married, though. Another girl with her same full name, unrelated I believe, married someone with my name - and my surname is not very common at all.)

My wife Zsuzsanna’s older poem from her teenage years follows in text - which implies another layer of reality and which matches my dream above as well as being from the same time period (do not forget the thousands of other facts that confirmed the “mystery girl’s” identity many years before I met her).

A castle on the hill

gleaming lights and flights of stairs

running through the corridors

looking for the door

it’s a mystery where are you going

you cannot go alone

for there is something eerie

watching the lights fade away

then all I heard was a shout

a voice pleading to get out

it’s a mystery where will I go

I cannot go alone

A mystery in the castle

A mystery of neon lights

A mystery of you and me

A mystery the facts of love

Morning of April 9, 1984. Monday.



I was in bed, listening to The Alan Parsons Project’s “Tales of Mystery and Imagination: Edgar Allan Poe”. I imagined the imagery and detail. It was one of my favorite cassettes of the time, along with their “I Robot” album.

In one vivid dream of the “mystery girl”, the petite Persian Hungarian gypsy girl from Australia (with a curious mixed accent) with the beautiful green eyes and dark curly hair, there is a storm coming; a large tornado. This, for whatever reason, does not concern me all that much.

As the tornado gets closer, I do feel a slight wariness. The tornado is the lower half of the Merkaba in dreams, and at other levels, is the unknown future or “destiny” if you will. On another level it is the energies of the supraconscious (Universal Mind) in connecting with other levels of consciousness as perceived by the conscious mind; that is, other “realms” of mind and supraconscious exchanging energies as a new force as with a cold front meeting a warm front in causing wind and stormy weather. As I am at least partly lucid, I am not worried about being killed. Once I step into the tornado I see a beautiful young girl and recognize her as my “dream girl”. She leans back on a bed and as I approach her (in this case, I somehow see myself approaching her) there is a sense of wholeness. It is almost as if I rose above the tornado and looked down into it, where everything was clear and blue, a circular portal; an image of fulfillment.

In a dream within a dream, I am seemingly Edgar Allan Poe in a way. My dream journals are so extensive that I have indexes within indexes, often copied to new journals with additional important observations and notes added. A raven wants to be fed stale undercooked hamburger, which it seems to like more than bologna or canned fish. I seem to receive a very important “warning” related to not allowing “ordinary” people to influence me in any way and not allow them to “interpret” not only my dreams, but even ideas I develop over time out of life experiences. I sensed an unusual idea that other people one day, around the world, would see a small part of my childhood dream work as well as other writing. Of course, this seemed like a preposterous idea. How could one just “show their dreams on television for others to watch” whenever they felt like it? Perhaps the advancements of computers could achieve this? Likely far too expensive for the average person to ever be feasible…

One person said that the tornado was related to my “mental turmoil” (though I had less “turmoil” than others I knew) over my pretense that I would be married to a beautiful girl and have children within ten years or so. The raven was perhaps a burden, it was claimed, a “shadowy presence” representing despair, “a shadow hanging over me”. However, in my dreams, my two youngest “fictional” children learn from the raven, which speaks to them of the patterns of life and nature. I supposed other people would have been happy over me never marrying who I considered the most beautiful girl on Earth in another country. People in general have mostly only “cop outs” to share, “cop outs” which never have any value, except in learning and knowing what not to do or what not to believe from others or society as a whole.

Years later, in real life, after I married my dream girl, “our” raven sat on my chair watching me type on my computer. My two healthy and loving children enjoyed having a raven in the house for a few weeks until I decided it was fully healed (from a non-fatal dog attack) enough to fly on its own. It still came back and said “hi” now and then…but there was one time at the computer, when I reached behind me to give it a piece of raw stale hamburger and gave it a pat that I thought of the potential for the majority of “ordinary” human beings to ever accept the truth…or in fact, have any credibility at all. I almost thought I heard the raven quote (deep in the recesses of my mind) “nevermore”.

Morning of September 11, 1983. Sunday.



This is one of several very vivid (but non-lucid) dreams that seemed to reflect aspects of foreshadowing regarding 9-11. Dreams of this type (including one similar to this one) seemed to start in 1977, where the main patterns of a more precise nature regarding my future wife (especially regarding her “conquering” of Susan R, the “other”) were already in play, so to speak.

My dream starts out where I am in a large wheat field. I seem to be in a fairly good mood and am feeling relaxed. However, there is a sense of impending disaster for some reason. Looking back towards the horizon (I am not sure of directional orientation - if I went by my Cubitis bedroom and in-dream focus, it would be mostly to the northeast), I see a low-flying airplane. There are two skyscrapers in the distance (but no other more discernible buildings or landmarks). The airplane is heading directly for one of the skyscrapers, the one on my right. Knowing it will probably crash (seemingly on purpose) and even though it is not that close to where I am, I start running west.

As I run west, I seem to feel myself either shrinking or at least changing in perspective in a very bizarre way. I suddenly seem to be running through some sort of metallic tunnel which is like an awareness of running inside of a “giant computer” with various printed circuits on floor, walls, and ceiling. Behind me is an approaching energy that I know will destroy me and anyone else in the world or at least in the region. It makes a sort of sizzling sound as it gets closer and closer to me. In the distance, at the end of this “hall”, I see a forest and hope I will reach it.

I perceive a phrase somewhat dramatically, “That’s it, that’s all, it’s everything gone!” almost like a line from poetry. I awake at this time as the sizzling gets louder behind me and I feel an intense heat. I have a sense that this giant hall has something to do with people communicating by computer on a global scale, but that the airplane has triggered the end of all the circuits or some such through an increasingly destructive explosion. This was a typical composite precognitive event. It was quite some time until I was actually “inside” computers relative to being able to easily manipulate machine language code (through a self-learning process and realizing it was all mostly “conditional jumps” and little else) until I went on to something else, as I then took on the perspective that computer technology was at least half-myth and most of what programmers claimed was false, which of course is as with pretty much everything else.

This dream appears to have a legitimate and typical precognitive marker. Even though the airplane crashing into the skyscraper (tower) is the waking component in this case, it is also a September 11th dream and has other legitimate associations with terror such as when I cry out “That’s it, that’s all, it’s everything gone!” This causes me to ponder what is really going on in other levels of collective consciousness over any given longer time period. While it is true that the skyscraper as the tower here is my emergent consciousness and the airplane the projection of my dream self in being “stopped” during the waking transition, there is more to it, primarily literal. I run through the tunnel which is also the waking conduit (more accessible here than the tower), even more so as it looks like a circuit-board on all four sides (two walls, ceiling, and floor), the circuit-board being a model of the human brain, here upsized as my dream self seems downsized, almost shrunken.