Recent DJ Posts

22nd January 2022

Fragment:

WoW, playing with MV at one point. Something about doing duo raids and so on. Some weapon racks with axes?


23rd January 2022

Fragment:

Some segment about being in a shop looking for a labcoat. Someone suggests one to me and I ask them to hold it out but I find that it doesn't really suit me and that it actually looks more like an undersized blouse.

(gap)

At a service station.


27th January 2022

Dream:

I'm with H, we're going somewhere in a car. I think we've been at home but we're at a service station or something now. I think I need my wallet to get something to eat but I left it at home. Then, someone gets in our car after I've loaded some bags, including a bag like my laptop bag but bigger and red instead of black.

The other person is a guy, a bit younger than either me or H. He wants to hang around with us and seems innocent enough. Something about finding a BL chest.

(recall gap?)

At some place like a school, before the guy appears. The place feels familiar. I go through some hidden and darker halls. At some point I need to wash my hands. I go through a creche and starting washing my hands there but stop when I remember there's a room next door with a normal (and not lower) sink.

Some bit later. In a car with H at first. Driving up a road through or into a town. Other drivers are a bit erratic and swervy. Then eventually we're on foot. It smells like urine. We walk up to a dilapidated building. False memory of being here before. H or someone else unlocks the front door. We go in and up some stairs? Then H stays behind a little. I worry a bit and there are two hooded figures slowly moving towards him and I don't understand what he's looking at and feel worried and impatient for him to follow me.

Not a dream, visualisation:

I vaguely see my alter ego at some stone steps. He's climbing and turned towards the point of view, beckoning. There's a heavenly feel to the place. This all fades quickly.

I see my alter ego with a rifle or similar sized gun, doing some kind of heist, presumably on a bank with a vault. I see this in a series of images showing different viewpoints with extreme perspective distortion, like they're CCTV footage and with few frames per second.

20th June 2021

Fragment:

Outside, walking through a town area of some kind, it's mostly flat, maybe with some downwards incline. I'm with someone I know closely, maybe J or L. There's something about a lan party of some kind. Walking through the town, maybe food or fast food is mentioned. There are eight of us in total? I am carrying a laptop around in one of the laptop bags we have here at home in waking life. In the dream, I am aware of my laptop being inferior to everyone else's.

Something about eating beans? There's some kind of sauce, maybe chilli, but no rice. There's a familiar taste.

While reading the exercise on p.78 of Dream Gates:

I'm sitting down and reading this exercise thinking about desert, then beach and then home. From the windows of many of the flats people are banging pots and pans, my awareness or focus on this quickly fades and then I'm focusing on the cars parked around the cul-de-sac, which are warm to the touch from the sun, but there is a morning light so actually most were in shade. Suddenly S appears, her lead is in my hand and she licks my face; I lick her back for good measure because I always feel she needs to have perspective of how it feels. She reels a little as she would.

Then she starts pulling hard on the lead, barking or growling at some passer-by and making me trip over and fall to the floor, vaguely feeling myself being dragged along but without any of the friction I'd expect. She makes her way to the hills behind the garages, it looks as it did after the shanties were removed but before the supermarket built. The scene changes to be next to the eucalyptus on that hill. Then, I have a vague intent.

It changes to unfinished highway that would be visible from the hill. I'm under the unfinished underpass of a concrete bridge. I know there's a door to my left but I cannot turn or see it from my point of view. I feel it's a metal door, painted a deep blue, maybe a little rusty. Like ones I've seen somewhere before in my childhood.

I sort of unintentionally break away from this and then just continue reading a bit more and then write some notes down for this.

---

Notes:

- Although the exercise asks for thinking of natural places and afterwards I found that my old home felt natural enough, because there's vegetation and bush in several parts and the building of where I used to live has always been pretty much on the edge of town, so nature of some kind has never been very far.

- The visualisation came about mostly unintentionally but it was pleasant, especially because although I couldn't see S very well, I appreciated the fact that she was there as some kind of animal guide. I was always told by mom that black dogs are considered luck charms in certain cultures, so I suppose that was present in my mind on some level. Thinking about it now, S appeared very well and despite vague visuals, she seemed just as I have always known her.

- The concrete underpass was shady and the unknown door could be a such a figurative entrance to the underworld and so on as the exercise suggests, even though the door might not lead down, it would go through earth.

17th January 2021

In bed, at about 3 AM whilst trying to fall asleep. During the whole thing I noticed my heart rate was higher than it would normally be at rest. Dialogue as close to original as I can recall and notes are in-line and unbracketed.

Not a dream and conscious with my eyes closed:

I start to think about wanting to be lucid and then wanting to look for the black lizard.

I hear the voice of Data and find myself seeing I'm on the bridge of the Enterprise, the one that's his contemporary. It's a bit clear at first visually. I have encountered Data other times in my head recently. For some reason he seems to encourage my conscious control and mastery of the sub-conscious and wishes to serve me.

Data: "Hello, may I call you captain?"

Me: "Hello. Yes, you may."

Data: "Will you accompany me to the turbolift sir?"

Me: "Yes, why?"

I find my own voice comes out naturally as if it was Picard's; I eventually try to alter this but with little success. Whenever Data speaks, half of it feels like it's being controlled by me, resulting in strange dialogue, but otherwise it feels detached from my ego.

Data: "I'd like to show you to the bridge; the battle bridge; no, the dream bridge."

Me: "The dream bridge?"

The visuals are muddy and too much like as seen in the show for my liking and I try to taste the walls, I try to feel where I'm walking and touching the railings and so on. It doesn't improve the visuals, but there is a feel of being in the place. We get on the turbolift and then find ourselves on a similar version of the bridge we were just in but it has a different feel. I see the large screen and the unmanned bridge.

Data: "Yes sir. The dream bridge will allow you dream control if you so desire."

Me: "How does it work?"

Data: "It allows you to scroll; view, pre-view, select, choose and so on. As in your childhood sir, it works the same way."

I understand what Data is referring to as being my pre-sleep lucid experiences from when I was much younger but this is somewhat different, more elaborate. I have an intuitive feel of how it's going to work but don't fully understand and the unclear visuals make it difficult to manipulate anything. I sit on a version of the captain's chair on this bridge. I feel the chair, just. There is some kind of controllable trackball I instinctively conjure on the right arm of the chair. I try to use and feel it for scrolling.

Me: "If I have any further questions, I will call on you, that will do for now. Goodbye Mr. Data."

Data says goodbye politely and I lose awareness of his presence as if he is completely gone. I try and use what's available to try to look through potential dreams. It doesn't work very well or as I expect. But one scene does pre-view better on the large screen, a M/M themed scene that plays itself out. But from there I don't know how to progress. I try to visualise more but it doesn't really work and visuals in general remained poor or unclear.

The rest of the dialogue recall is too vague now, and I recall calling out to Data a couple of times and he would appear every single time I called him, and disappear whenever we said goodbye to each other. The computer would talk to me as well if I started a sentence by saying "Computer," but for the most part it was useless, probably because of how in the show I perceive the ship's computer as having no intelligence, a feature that Data, even as a character in my head, exhibits very well.

I have found the experience to be somewhat odd; although a lizard character has tried to (aggressively) promote my ego's control and confidence, Data as a character is seemingly trying to promote control and mastery but in a very loose and passive way, allowing me to explore at my own pace for the most part and actively trying to teach me things. I think what has surprised me is the fact that these characters are not at the ego level but they are promoting it and basically siding with the ego.

Data seemingly has loyalty for me as he would indeed for the captain on the Enterprise. For a couple of nights now I have thought about trying to remember what those pre-sleep experiences from my childhood felt like, so this whole thing has felt like a following of that and the theme may be because we've been watching the show again, although this was unexpected.

The rest of the recall is lost but I was awake for a while longer after this.

Note: Technically, this wasn't a dream. Not entirely sure why I felt like putting on the DJ. Last night I was listening to the OST from STRAFE through some old headphones (80s I think) I have which make me almost unable to hear/feel the room if no music is playing, and I just had my eyes closed while listening.

The soundtrack feels a bit "melancholic" to me in general, but others might not think of it that way. I wasn't trying to think of anything in particular and some imagery formed, though with little vividness, hardly any more vivid than regular imagination. Forgot some of the details, since this was last night before going to sleep.

I couldn't recall any actual dreams today, my focus on waking up wasn't in the right place and ironically I'd forgotten about intents last night.

---

As I was listening to second half of the OST, I had thoughts come and go of "darkness". Not vivid but dream-like imagery of being pulled down by my "dream" arm into pits - swarms of spiders and insects would appear and I wondered why it was that I could never have visualised a scene like this without feeling fear or horror in the past. Though the imagery wasn't strong, I still felt some disgust at some of the insects, particularly big ones.

This repeated itself in different ways a few times mixed with other passing thoughts I can't remember, related to the imagery. I remember thinking that this probably wasn't what I was "looking for" and thinking that it was interesting that a dream-like setting had formed.

Then as the soundtrack got into the last quarter the thoughts went sort of into the actual in-game area that the track would play in, though the imagery was still relatively weak vs an actual dream, I could sort of feel a dream-body and started remembering the black lizard from another of my DJ entries.
I started wanting to spot him but instead I realised that I was that lizard this time, seeing from first-person, but wearing a labcoat (which is one of my artificial dream-signs) and though I couldn't visualise clearly, I tried to do hand/finger reality checks; counting wasn't possible due to the low duration of physical memory and lack of "vision" - but passing my clawed fingers through my other hand's palm worked.

Though I was fully aware of the music being outside this and the fact that I was sitting on a chair, I felt it was important to try and do a RC to see if my mind would agree with what I was wanting to do. The place the "dream" body was in, was indeed dream-like, despite being awake.

As the music progressed I remember running through the halls of Athena (the in-game area) as if it were in the actual game, getting "deeper" into the area, "looking" down at my "dream" legs, noticing that they were scaly and black and that the feet were dinosaur-like, with 3 front claws and 1 rear claw or something like that; the in-game enemies were appearing and I attacked them with the claws I had and my large reptilian mouth, eating some of the smaller enemies and making particular note of all the blood that was showering from the enemies, just like it would in the game. I wondered, was this the darkness I was looking for? I concluded it wasn't. I tried to taste the blood but the sense wasn't strong enough since I could still feel my actual mouth too. I tried using the channeling effect from Warframe with my attacks but while this did disintegrate the enemies into energy, more seemed to appear from the dispersed energy.

As the music got to the last track I had on the list, which is the music for the final room in Athena, I realised I was standing where the boss would be. There was the player character down below in the chamber; he was autonomous and attacked the boss control room tower and shot towards me too, not penetrating the glass with the bullets. For some reason I taunted him by licking the glass, noticing the tongue to not be reptilian-like but being long, with somewhat better visuals than before. Then I remember breaking the glass and crawling down the wall as a lizard would and going for the player character and killing him; the hordes of enemies that were attacking him turned to me instead and I remember fighting them and soon after the music ended and the imagery ended, as if I'd" woken" up, despite having been "awake" the whole time.

Edit: Forgot to remove private entry checkbox, so changed that. (I sometimes check it so I don't post by accident when I'm sleepy and everything is half-typed ).

Edit2: Added a name to the title of the DJ entry so I can find it more easily when I'm looking for it.

Wrote out a looong dream for the dream contest even though, it being nonlucid, I would've only gotten a single point for posting it.

Then Dreamviews glitched out and was like "haha, it didn't post. why don't you hit back and then reload? "

I hit back. The dream was still there. I reloaded.

Poof.

non-dream dream lucid-dream
i am sorry that there is no dream for today, but i wanted to post this because i wanted to demonstrate just how important a sleeping pattern is. as you can see from the title i only got 5 hours of sleep last night, because i slept over at a friends house, which directly correlates to the number of dreams i can remember. It is, i feel, important to note that you should no seclude your self or stop seeing your friends, bu if you are serious about lucid dreaming, don't go out too often (no more than once or twice a week). But bare in mind, i am still a lucid dreaming noob.
~ Thanks for reading

Okay, so I had been helping tear down a Superchic[k] concert in a church in a nearby town that I've never been to before. (Because I had helped set up.)
As the last things were being loaded into their trailed, I walked back into the the backstage area, which was designed to also function as a small gymnasium.
I paused and thought for a moment...
I am in a what?
Big, empty room. [dreamsign]
With what?
A small number of people in the far corner. [dreamsign]
And there is what outside?
A trailer full of stuff.
Which is?
A sort of collection of things. [DREAMSIGN]
And what just got over?
A concert by a band that is probably a step up in popularity than this venue would be hosting.
And you're helping them pack away their gear?
Yes. (Hmm... that's weird)

...hey, what's that fifteen feet up the wall?
It's a door- wait, A DOOR?!?!?
Yes, it's a door.
What the heck is a DOOR doing a foot from the ceiling? Wait-

I promptly spent [roughly] the next 200 seconds performing up to two DOZEN reality checks, many of them multiple times.
No dice.

Whaaaaat??? All the criteria in the book have been fulfilled, I have GOT to be dreaming... right?

Well. I guess not.

Wednesday 1/4/2012
DR 5am - illegals crossing river; in class with teacher S; game show on TV

Thursday 1/4/2012
Took an evening nap - new HH - 1 tiny heart and 1 happy face

Friday Jan.6/2012 bed 11:55pm

Set up another experiment - put a small piece of paper with one letter and a colored pen on top of my kitchen cabinet to try to see it in OBE.

GM at 5am
woke up from OBE at 6:35am

OBE#6
I’m in my bed trying to OBE/WILD. I suddenly realize, I see my room from the correct vantage point, as I’m laying on my left side. It’s darker than in WL (I have some nightlights IWL). All I see is left side of the bed. Right next to me is my cat. I see her as energy in shape of sleeping, balled-up cat. I immediately start rolling out. It takes me a few tries, I’m amazed, she is like a little speed bump. I’m not worried about hurting her, because I know, IWL she is closer to my feet.

So I roll out and fall to the ground. I start crawling on all four towards the kitchen. IWL, its about 8 feet from my bed. As I’m crawling in total dark, I realize, I could feel my way. As I raise my right arm, I bump into a piece of furniture. I grab the round, smooth, cool leg of a desk/chair. Right behind it is a cabinet. I don’t know how, but next thing I’m looking at the top of the kitchen cabinet. It’s much brighter now and I can see a piece of paper identical to the one I put up there IWL and I clearly see capital letter T. Next to it is a small packet of handy-wipe and text on it is in orange cursive. I take it as a color of a pen I left up there. Other than this, there is a bunch of letters and postcards, addressed to me. I can clearly read my full name written in cursive, not in my handwriting. There is also a book. I really wish I could read that all, but I wake up.

After I wake up, I check , if I got the letter and color right. Nope, the paper I left up there has a big square on it and the pen is green.

I was disappointed, especially, because I don’t own any table or chair, that could account for the leg I grabbed in OBE, and I really wanted to go OOB in physical realm - identical or near identical to waking life. It took me almost 2 days to realize, that I actually do, and It’s exactly where I felt it.

I played back in my mind, how I rolled out and crawled and as I’m following my path, I see a small foot-rest, that has 4 6-inch legs and they look exactly as what it felt in my OBE.

WBTB 7am-817am

Regular Dream:
I’m in Mexico. Some nice resort. We go to the pool. Beautiful clear blue water. I dive in, feels good. Next time we come, the pool is closed. Someone with flu contaminated it. Bunch of people disappointed.

We decide to go to the beach, but we see dark clouds gathering in the distance. Wind is starting and I see something like a tornado. I take pictures. People are trying to take shelter in the yard of the hotel. I’m in the yard, next to the door. Someone is banging it, trying to get in. The white door is locked and padlocked. I open it anyway and in walk two children. More people come in. Also one female officer. We start to joke, saying wow, this is not a dream, unlike other, that were dreams. I agree with her, this is not a dream.

Then a big UFO appears in the sky. We are all looking up. I'm taking lots of pictures. The UFO separates into different shapes, it’s trying to tell us something. Suddenly, a pile of broken-up weapons appear on the ground. I have a feeling, they tell us to “take out the trash”, as in weapons are trash of the mankind and we should get rid of them.

Saturday, 1/7/2012 Bed 10pm
Traveling on train with my friend M. There are 3 different stations, that feel like videogame levels.

Sunday, 1/8/2012 Bed 12:45 am B-complex 50mg at 5pm
Lots of dreams, didn’t write them down