I am sitting at a wedding feast of the gods, which I apparently rejoined after leaving with Eris. Hera, Aphrodite, and Athena are alternately fuming at me, and ignoring me. I chuckle to myself. I stand up and walk around. The setting on Mount Olympus is amazing. Wildflowers and majestic tall trees are everywhere. I see Hercules drunkenly tossing boulders over a cliff, whooping it up. I join him at his side, tossing boulders over. He stops. "No, Mr. Nothing, this game is called Drunken Boulder Toss. Every time you miss, you have to take a drink." "Miss what?" See that mountain? That's out target." I toss a boulder at a mountain peak which is about two miles away. I make it about 15 or 20 yards out from the cliff. Hercules laughs and pours wine out of a large barrel into a golden flask for me to drink. I drink deeply. It's amazing. Sweet, fruity, and delicious. Zeus joins us. He tosses a boulder. It goes sailing into the sky until it's out of sight. "You have missed, father!" Hercules laughs uproariously. Zeus joins in, and pours himself a drink. I pick up a boulder and toss it straight up. It lands on my head, bounces off, then rolls off the edge of the cliff. Hercules falls over laughing, and Zeus hands me another drink of godly wine. Pan walks over to us. He tosses a boulder to Hercules, who catches it. "I missed the mountain," he grins. And puts his face under the wine barrel spigot and pours it into his mouth he drinks the whole barrel. "Okay... beetchez... firszt, I'mz going to toss one of theses bitchees..." He picks up a boulder, and tosses it at the mountain. It sails through air, and hits it, making a huge cloud dust and a muffled boom. We all clap and laugh drunkenly. "Hmm... let me try! That wine works well." I pour an entire barrel into my mouth also. I pick up a boulder and lift it above my head, and accidentally toss it backwards. It lands behind me on a steep slope, and rolls down to me. I turn, and the boulder crashes right into me. I get stuck to it, and roll with it down the cliff. It feels like a fun ride. The boulder and I, roll to the bottom, then I fly up and rejoin the other gods on the plateau above. They are laughing uproariously. "Did I win?" They laugh harder. Zeus shouts, "NO!" with a thunder clap, and tosses a boulder at me, which I narrowly dodge.
*abbreviated due to pain* really long dreams... go to Moon, morph into a werelion, meditate beneath clock, there is a purple wedge on the clock indicating "delta dream state", and I take the clock image, and add it to my HUD. I slow time until the second hand seems to go by really slowly ..... TOCK ..... TOCK ..... .... ... TOCK ..... I close my eyes, but still see my HUD. YOU ARE DREAMING says the circle in the upper right hand corner. Right, I don't need to blink, don't need to breathe. I sit beneath a great stone clock on a hill in the jungle, and I don't breathe, blink, or move. I feel the cold stone under me, the wind blow through my fur. I smell nectar and all sorts of plants and animals, without breathing. I turn off my outer vision without closing my eyes, for I have no eyes. Eyes are illusion. I see my HUD over black. I see again. I close my eyes, and look right through my eyelids, for my eyelids are illusions. A butterfly lands on my nose. It pricks it like a mosquito. I feel confused and swat it away. Suddenly, Shadowtech appears. He turns the world around me to a Hell world. "You're in hell, bitch!" "Yadda yadda yadda. I'm the Son of Satan, don't really give a shit." I snap my fingers and turn the world back. "Well, you're no fun!" He disappears. A bird flies to my ear, sings to me something about the matrix, and i see so much energy, and every single tiniest particle has an individual number, a number assigned to it by the master computer which was created by God to make universes. Don't panic, but apparently the universe was made by a giant Xerox machine made by a god who likes making lots of universes very quickly. Mytlzplyk appears. "You know, Club Nexus is calling you!" "Get thee behind me, NatasNatasZassaznatas! He disappears in a huff. I open a mirror portal, and step through to the Temple of Nothing in the City of Nowhere. I am standing on the landing pad at the top of the Temple, and people suddenly cheer down below. Apparently, we are celebrating the 110 year celebration since I founded the City of Nowhere. that's funny. I step inside. Everything is so familiar, so realistic and vivid. I dip my hand in the scrying pool being lit by a sunbeam from above. There is a small turquoise stone in it, which I promptly eat. Tastes like a jellybean. "Why did you do that," asks my faithful wraith High Priest, Sarnox. "Lucidity. My HUD went down. Trying to learn to keep it up at all times." "Ah, the HUD. I've had one ever since I played Metroid." "How could you play Metroid when you were my dog?" "It was the life after that one." "Oh. So, some kinda celebration?" "Only our 110th anniversary, Mayor. Funny how your Urthan Dreamers get such bad amnesia. Anyway, good to have you back. You've been gone a few decades." "Decades?" "It's fine, don't worry about it. I and your former worshippers have been taking care of everything. You know, it's time." "Time?" "It's about to be the 111th birthday of the Temple of Nothing." Suddenly, a rumbling. The ziggurat is moving. We step out to the landing pad. Ridiculously long reins appear in Sarnox's hands. A large turtle head appears out of the ground, and the entire pyramid rises. "Yes, we are going to orbit the earth, make the Temple a Space Station!" "No, don't want to do that. Did I say that? I change my mind. Sounds boring. How about we fly this crazy space turtle through dreams of the willing, and throw rainbows and fluffy bunnies at them?" "Yes sir!" Sarnox shakes the reins, and the space turtle unearths itself, and the people cheer as we float up and away into space. I sit on the launch pad, and light up a long stemmed pipe, watching the stars go by. "You know, Sarnox, I always did want to ride a Dreamworld ziggurat temple sitting on a giant space turtle through dreams and throw rainbows and fluffy bunnies at them." "Funny. Me too, sir." "Well, here's a weirdo's dream right now." I open a huge mirror portal, and we turn the space turtle toward it. Scene: A boy is praying. "Please, dear, Santa, make the demons go away. Every time in my dreams... Well, you know how it is. Amen." The boy goes to sleep with his teddy bear. We ride into the mirror. An astral demon appears at the boys bed. We are tiny, about six inches high. The turtle opens its mouth, and a laser shoots out, cutting the demon's head off. We go into the boy's third eye. I am in the boy's dream. I am Santa Claus, flying a sleigh with a turtle pulling it. There is a snowy city beneath me, full of demons and vampires tormenting people. WHAT THE FUCK. I use time dilation, then I divide myself, and summon an army of summoners which summon elementals to battle the vampires and demons. I make it rain to wash all the bloody snow away. I find the little boy asleep in a large house by a Christmas tree. I go in a window, and leave a present of a sleigh pulled by a turtle, and giggle. The boy wakes up. "Hi Santa! You came! You made the demons go away, huh?" "Yes I did." "What's this? A present?" The boy opens it. "A Santa pulled by a flying turtle? That's funny!" The boy laughs. "If you ever have demons in your dreams again, just pet the turtle, and say, Santa, help." "Ok! Santa, why do you have a turtle?" "Because I'm the real Santa!" *had a lot of other dreams, but can't type them all, oh well!*
MONTULU, THE GREAT DESTROYER OF NOTHING! I am Montulu, the Great Destroyer of Nothing. I am a giant monster inside my Temple of Nothing on the Green Moon. I grow a beacon out of my head, a beautiful green and gold light. “I AM THE GREAT MONTULU, DESTROYER OF NOTHING. I SUMMON THEE!” I shoot a dark energy beam to earth to draw dreamers to me. I see many. I morph into Juargawn, my cat beast self, and am a little angelic and demonic. Atras waves his arms and runs to me. “Hey man. I think I did it? Did I? Is this real? Is this a dream?” “What do you think?” “Well everything looks real,” he says doing a nose pinch RC. “No... wait- I am dreaming. What are you doing in my dream? Is this a shared dream? Is this your dream? Are we in Mexico? Are you an alien? Why do all the people look like animals and aliens and superheroes? Why does that guy look like a talking plant? I am so confused! What is going on? This is amazing! Am a dreaming?” he says looking at his hands. He skin begins to change to a sky blue. “Oh my god!” he disappears. Windhover appears standing next to me. We are leaning on staffs looking out at all the people. She is wearing a thick white robe with light green on the inside. She has a white wooden staff with leaves growing out of it. She seems tall and very ancient, like an elf queen that has lived for thousands of years, and has very slow emotional changes. “How long do you think it will take, until we realize we are always dreaming, Nomad?” “Lifetimes, probably, but at that point, we’ll finally have evolved into full awareness of the fourth and fifth dimensions, and we can exist in all five simultaneously in complete harmony.” “Hm.. that makes sense.” She suddenly morphs into a tall woman that looks half Asian and half white wearing a business suit. She sits down at a desk and starts drawing. I create some holograms which dance across the desk. “What is that?” I ask. “Oh, it’s my visual DJ. I keep this in my dreams to help me remember things I want to draw.” “What’s this?” she asks, referring to the holograms. “That’s me, that’s MoSh, that’s Raven, that’s you, that’s Xaphor.... look...” She looks at the holograms and claps her hands. “How silly and amusing!” “Oh, pardon me, I said that in Korean, and yet... I perceive you understood me?” “Yes.” “Really?” “That is how things work in dreams. I am allied with an entity that translates all languages. I take the Babelfish from my ear, and it morphs into a fairy. She divides herself in two, one green, and one red. The red one flies to Windhover, and flies around her head. “Hello, Fairy! I am waking up. Bye Nomad!” I bow to her as she fades. Raven flies down on a broom. “Hey Nomad? What are you doing? I was at Hogwarts. My students, some of them have greatly accelerated and are teaching me things. They have learned how to dimensional travel.” “That is amazing.” “Oh, I went to Denn, kicked some orc ass, then I told them, hey, be cool, why don’t we have some brownies and red wine with the humans and such. I infected them with a love virus. It was awesome.” We high five and laugh. “So is this shared dream project thing... oh, look at all the dreamers!” There are many people below running around like ants. Some are building things, some are battling. “Hey, you!” I shout. “All of you!” They look up at me. “You are all dreaming!” Most of them do RC’s, and a lot of them wake up. A few of them run up the pyramid. I see Loaf standing in the corner looking up at the sky in silence. Atras runs up the pyramid, and speaks to me out of breath. “Oh my God, Nomad, I did the go back to bed thing. I re-entered. Did I remember the dream though?” “I don’t know. Did you write it down?” “No? I don’t know.” Atras smacks his head. ‘Why don’t you relax and enjoy the dream?” Atras sits down and looks at the dreamscape. Flying cars and flying saucers flit about over the jungle canopy as the sun sets on the City of Nowhere. “It is pretty amazing,” Atras says. I smile and walk to Loaf. “I like this world. The other wold sucks. It’s a piece of shit.” “I know how you feel,” I say. Raven stands next to us, and we silently share healing energy as the sun goes down, and the earth rises.
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