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What I can remember of the dream starts off with me talking to my boyfriend. We're in our apartment and we're talking about moving somewhere together, but I tell him that I have a job that I have to go do first. I have to go to a different city and investigate some strange disappearances where none of the locals can figure out what's happening. I walk over to my laptop at this point to check my email, as I at some point earlier had emailed the mayor of the city I was checking out to try to make accommodations for living arrangements. I noticed the mayor had messaged back and I was stressed out to realize that it was my ex, and the message he wrote was this:

Hello [Name],

You know you're always welcome here. I have made arrangements for you to stay in the best place I could grab for your temporary visit. You know I look forward to seeing you.

It made me a little antsy and my boyfriend even more so in my dream, but I told him that he knew I had work to do, so go I must. There's a brief period where I'm packing up my things, and then the dream skips.

It now goes to my ex and some other man at the city. It almost seems like old-timey western, but with a high flair of Victorian steampunk. The second guy present is rather lanky and tall, and everything about him is dark. He's dressed in all black and with a bearded face, dark hair, and the only thing bright about him are his green eyes. It's night outside, and him and my ex are standing just outside a fenced area and just inside is a baby elephant. It's walking around inside as the two men talk. They discuss my coming to town, and the stranger looks very happy while my ex does not.

"You don't have to do this," my ex says as he watches the little elephant graze around inside the fences. The other man just laughs and keeps his gaze ahead as well, "Except I do have to, she stands in the way of my future plans." Not long after the man speaks, a small area of earth crumbles in on itself just behind the elephant's back feet, and it cries out as part of it slides in. It recoveries briefly and prepares to pull itself out, but it cries out again as something seems to grab onto it and drag it inside the hole. The cries of terror quickly die out and are instead replaced with low squelches and gurgles. The two of them stand there a little longer after the sounds die out before the stranger says, "And this will help me take care of the problem."

It then goes to me once more, perhaps the next night, getting settled in my temporary place in my pajamas, and for some reason I have brought my dog Chad with me. I am putting away some of my stuff when I find a note in one of the drawers in the bedroom. It's from my ex, and it's warning me that someone is trying to kill me and that I should check for something I didn't pack and hide soon. I don't see anything unusual in my bags, so I go looking through drawers until I find what seems like a large slab of raw meat, and it completely reeks. Who knew how long it had been in there! I was going to simply remove it and disregard the message when I heard and felt a low rumbling in the floor near me. Extremely frightened, I grab my dog by the collar and run to the bathroom that's interconnected to my bedroom. I shut the door quickly and sit on the floor with my pet, my arms wrapped around him and my heart beating through my chest.

The loud crack of large wood splitting comes from the room and I wake up just as I actually see the shadow of some large creature from the crack underneath the door.

Amount of time slept: 2 hours

Date: 24 Jan

Pre bed: 200mg val, 50mg B6

Wbtb: 1/4 latte

Wasn't very wakeful even though repeated mantras a few times, fell asleep rather fast, had a few non-lds I can't recall

DILD: I am having a tense conversation with this female DC I know. She starts criticizing me. I reply that as a revenge I will then do something to make her feel the same way she makes me feel with all her comments. While this is a rather habitual mental reaction, I notice that contrary to other times I don't feel anything at that very moment. Still, as part of my revenge scheme I take her and turn her upside down in front of all the DCs in the room to publicly humiliate her.

As I stare at her, I notice that she just stays there, like a motionless puppet and become lucid. We're in a very large meeting room with a long table in the middle and lots of DCs participating in some corporate event. I'm in a daring mood and decide it's time to defy social rules by getting on the table in the middle of this meeting. Then I almost lose lucidity being carried away by thoughts of how all of the world's problems may be solved by by issuing unlimited credit cards to the entire population.

I keep thinking about this issue as I leave the place and continue towards an unknown city center. There to help me focus more I shout out loud "I am dreaming". There was a slight instability so this helps me ground as well.

Then I remember the invisibility task and go in the middle of the road pretending to be invisible.There are cars coming from all directions but as soon as I pay attention to them, they hit the breaks and spin a bit. I turn around and the same thing happens again. Then I see this huge truck coming in my direction. I start waving hands, checking if the driver can see me. He doesn't hit the brake or slow down and the truck is quickly coming closer. I step to the side to avoid the impact. There's little space between me and the truck, my uncontrolled expectations cause it to fall sideways on top of me, where I feel this huge weight on me. I try to move and free my head, but this results in a physical feeling, which gives me the impression I have just moved in my bed. I expect to wake up any moment but get an FA instead.

I believe that I have woken up for real and the first thing I notice is this piano music coming from the outside. I'm actually in the neighbors where we used to live some time ago and look to find where the music is coming from. I see this girl that I remember (possibly from another dream but could be false memory) who got that piano there and something about her. As if that isn't enough, the balcony is crowded - many people in their 20s and 30s dressed with business attire as if attending some sort of event. I'm think this is just too much when I am trying to fall asleep and decide this can only be a dream, reminding myself that I was trying to ld. Can't member how, but it seems I lose consciousness after that and have another FA.

I think in the beginning, I'm looking from the window to see what's down but then the scene changes and we move to this wooden porch. I initially see this strange big animal that looks suspiciously like a DS, I can't tell what kind of animal it is. Then there is a smaller one and I'm still trying to identify the large one. I'm starting to have some real doubts about this and begin to count the animals, one now looks like a bear and can't remember the rest but there's four of them. I conclude this is a dream and go to interact with one of the animals. It looks like a very large black boar/tapir and as I place my hand on its snout, it bites me and it even hurts.

I move slightly to the left and examine the rest of the area, where I notice a number of elephant-like creatures. I think they are separated from the porch, but no cage, it looks much like in a zoo. At some point the elephants begin to distort in features, open mounts and start roaring very louldy in a generally unpleasant manner. I try to stop them by thinking I want them to stop, but nothing happens and more join the roaring event. I remain there staring at them as they do so, kind of calm, but there's also this deeper inner response to their roaring, which surely is what is affecting them. I think that the problem is exactly this feedback loop - I am thinking that they are roaring, therefore they continue roaring. Then conveniently, I recall the inivible task and think it can be applied quite nicely here. I think that I am invisible. To my genuine surprise, at this very moment all the roaring stops for good.

I'm curisous to how far I can take this with my supposed invisibility and turn around and try to sneak out, while carefully listening for any reaction. The dream fades.

Notes: I have reduced B6 dosage to 50mg as previously it made me too wakeful. Recent valerian series - characterized by difficult recall, lower lucidity levels and more bizarre occurrences, in particular animals.

Night of January 7, 2014. Tuesday.



There are no stronger emotions here; it is mostly of a scenario which I am not actually “in”, although still with deeper depth-perception and within a realistic environment as if perhaps I am floating about in an invisible form. Mostly, it is in a park, on an elevated area, but still with other higher hills around - in late afternoon with a large group of people, many appearing to be wealthy elderly ladies drinking cocktails from regular glasses, but other types of people are about as well.

Mostly, there is the awareness of a trumpeting elephant but with time-stretched and “smeared” (in terms of audio) aspects, a sound I sometimes had in my mind as a child. It repeats a few times. There is no elephant to be seen, though. One of the older women says, “my enemy” regarding the unseen elephant, and this scene is repeated. The elephant’s trumpet seems very close to having the essence of an old-style air-raid siren (but “slowed down” in audio and subtle awareness).

A younger man (in his late twenties, perhaps) with two children on his right, all standing in a clearing of this park (some people prefer the areas with more trees, including the older women) - a younger daughter in a fancy black dress, almost like those you see in ballroom dancing, and her brother to her left (the father’s right side) around the same age in casual clothes. The man has a replica gun in his right hand pointing precisely vertically down at the top of the daughter’s head and she seems completely unaware of this (even though you would think she would feel the touch of it). He clicks it at least once, but it is not a cap gun, just a plastic replica, and it makes hardly any sound. The boy notices this and pretends to be shot himself and falls lightly but gets up immediately (the girl does not seem to notice or care about this, either). People seem almost to be waiting for the end of the world while standing around in this park, but many with a sort of party mentality.

The scene with the replica gun reminds me very vaguely of the final scenes from “The Mist” from 2007 (which has the real gun which is used to shoot his son so the monsters will not get him) but no one gets hurt here.

The elephant never shows up and the world and life goes on. Perhaps it was a practice run. Very uneventful but slightly eerie.

I wake up for a brief moment and then go back to sleep, and am able to do a WILD

I'm in the middle of a downtown city. It looks to be about midday - the sun is out and it's bright. The clarity is fantastic. I can see the individual leaves on the trees. I remember from reading Stephen LaBerge's work that in order to keep the dream stable I need to be constantly participating. So I try to take in everything I can. I begin to run down the street. There are no other people in sight. It's like a ghost city. I come to what looks like an Art History museum. Behind Glass is an ancient statue of an elephant. It's a humanoid elephant and it's style was strongly reminiscent of Egypt, India, and Greece all kind of melded into one. I remember studying the details of the white marble and marveling at how intricate they were. I even turned away and looked back and everything stayed the same. It was that stable!

(I drew a depiction of it)


I walk inside the museum, and feel like I own it. I mean essentially I did own it because it was my dream. But I walk around and look at a few things. I see another statue of a horse belonging to the same civilization that was intricately decorated with a headdress and feathers. I am pretty amazed at the beauty my mind had came up with for this civilization. I feel like I could derive a whole culture just from the statues that had been placed there for me to see. I walk into a darkened room and begin to hear an ominous static noise that reminds me of the game "SlenderMan". And as soon as I begin to fear seeing him he shows right up - just as expected. I quickly try to ignore him and he disappears.

I notice a guy in a security uniform standing in the museum. I walk up to him and feel like he shouldn't belong. His eyes shift away from me, and he has a look on his face like he is up to no good. I tell him he needs to leave and he promptly replies "No."

That's fine, so I try to erase him by waving my hand in front of my eyes and hoping as my hand passes he will disappear (this has worked in the past for me). But, alas, it does not work and he is still standing there.

I turn around and see a couple of other guards (who seem legit enough) by a door. I wave them over and tell them to escort the guy I didn't like out of the museum. They immediately follow my instruction, grab him by the arm and take him away. I feel pretty satisfied, and then the dream ends

I'm glad to be in a patch of more peaceful, relaxed lucids that are geared toward exploration. These are usually among my favorites and tend to provide more opportunity for completing tasks. (Not that I was successful completing anything in this dream, of course, but theoretically...)

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #56: The Kangarant

I'm in a small prop plane flying over a high, snowy mountain range. There are two other guys in the plane with me, both in their 20s. There are no seats -- everyone is standing. Nobody appears to be piloting the aircraft.

The plane barrels toward a mountain peak, and I shout, "Agggh, watch out!!" But the plane clears the peak (though just barely) and the two guys high five. They look at me like they don't get why I'm being such a baby.

"Where are we?" I ask. One of the guys ponders this for a moment and says, "California." California? "No way," I think, and become lucid.

The plane goes into a hard, sickening turn to the right and starts losing altitude. My two companions think this is great, but I want off. I phase my left hand through one of the plane's windows. After a brief pause, the rest of my body follows and I'm flying outside in the clouds, the plane buzzing off into the distance.

I'm descending pretty rapidly but I feel like I'm in control. Unexpectedly, I pass by a gray-haired man who's dressed in an Army Service Uniform. He looks extremely high-ranking, almost certainly a general. He's staying still while I'm moving so I whoosh right by him. He's muttering something as I fly by, but I can't make it out.

My descent slows and I land in an airfield. Some planes are taxiing on runways while others are refueling. There's even a rocket set up nearby! It looks vaguely like a Saturn V but it's way too small.

Stranger still are the animals roaming everywhere across this airfield. Each has at least one human handler. I spot camels for sure, and several other types that I can't remember. But the animal that really grabs my attention is something that I can only describe as the cross between a kangaroo and an elephant. (Kangarant? Eleroo?)

This animal is about 30-feet tall, gray-skinned like an elephant, but with the powerful hind legs and dainty forelimbs of a kangaroo. It has a marsupial pouch but its head has tusks and a modest trunk. The head is elephant-like, but sleeker and longer than an elephant's. I watch this beast in fascination for a while. A handler on a raised platform is passing it some kind of hay to eat. The kangarant munches away, passive and content.

I start thinking about tasks and I fly past the airfield to see what's out there. I come to a beach where several vendors have stalls set up. I decide that this is Australia and that I should do the Australia Task of the Year. I remember something about Mel Gibson. Actual task: ("Hitch a ride on a sea turtle, dolphin, or humpback whale and explore the Great Barrier Reef. Bite a great white shark and don't die. ") I decide that since I don't know what I'm doing I had better try something else. I decide to figure out some kind of way to travel to the Colosseum and have my gladiator battle.

I convince myself that a time machine will appear behind me. I turn around, shouting, "Time machine!" This fails to do anything but make me feel stupid.

A girl who looks like she's about nine walks up to me. I think she's perhaps Philippina. I ask, "Can you show me the way to the time machine?"

She nods, looking a little cross with me. "But I'm not a girl! I'm a boy!" She glares at me, waiting for me to make this right. I don't really know how to respond, since she can apparently read my mind (and I still think she's a girl.)

"Sorry...?" I offer, and this seems to satisfy her. She starts running inland across a nearby road and I follow. We've only gone a short distance when I wake up.

I had this dream last night but its a bit complicated. I was in a cave with a waterfall near two men (well I assume both were men, I could only tell one was a man, who was tall&dark like Jafar but I couldn't tell about the 2nd person). Well anything the two other people were in a sword fight (from where I was standing and I was standing on the other side of the cave) and the 2nd person fall down the waterfall but didn't hit the bottom since a flying carpet came and got the person and escaped some place else.


The scene then changes to a castle and its kind of in first person, I assume I was female but dressed like a male.) but there was this evil blonde mistress (who I will call "Narcissa") of the castle who wanted me to write a story for her. I also remember that there were two other kids in the dream, one was actually a boy and the other one was a girl. I believe I kind of was kidnapped before this part of my dream and the other two kids were other kidnappees (Ie kids who been kidnapped) but I was the eldest of the children being 16 since the boy was like 10 and the girl was like 6-8). When I refused to I assume the first night I was there after I woke up (I assume I had been drugged sometime between the cave, and the castle..it happened "off-screen") Narcissa chained me with I assume enchanted chains since the scene then switched briefly to 3rd person and I saw (what I assume was my female self dressed in boy's clothing hint: Disney's Prince Phillip clothing complete with hat ) and the hands were writing a story by themselves via the chains. Then the second night Narcissa made us watch a TV that only had stuff to do with I believe her evil stuff and there was a video of a cat in there too and I think Narcissa was embarrassed by the cat video since she turned off the TV then, and I chit-chatted with the other two kidnapped kids.

The last bit of the dream was in 3rd person Person 2- from earlier in the dream -- who I could now tell was actually a man..I think my suitor maybe? and he was dressed in an Aladdin-style "prince' outfit and riding an Abu-like elephant. I think at one point as the elephant and the man was going down the street a guard tried to injure the elephant but elephant just used his trunk and took a hold of the guard and shook him like he was a rag doll.

Bus on rotunda. Elephant. A dystopian cage. Yellow and black. Fighting. A huge enemy. Gap in the cage. A female enemy. Harder to defeat. Hero or me fell into lava. Turned himself myself into molecules. Flew. Ice. Freeze. House. Someone wants to take the object. Someone protecting it. Two objects.

Ministop. Buying barbecue. 18 of each different kind. A and M are married and have a daughter.

NOTE: Audio 2

Outsmart. Terminal.

Clay. Magick. birds. escape. Stegosaurus. Bengal tiger. Escape to forest. Trees. Chased by an elephant/bear. He's coming. I became aware. I dropped my clay weapon and challenged. I said now what? This creature ran past me. He smiled. He looked like a native from some Caribbean/African island. Or Somalia. He started to walk back then he looked back at me and said, now I teach you how to dance Latin. I said it's so cool.

Office. Thumbtack. A text or other. Boss. Airplane. Miss. The next one to? CLosed. The airplane of individuals. Army.

I am at work and Kendall S. is there. I get into the golf cart and as I go to my task, a baby lion runs in front of my path. I stop and am frightened at first but soon realize it means no harm. It's mother appears. Later a medium-sized elephant stares me down from behind a madrone tree. (This is in the dream-scape that has one large room for us all to sleep in. Where we move the beds around.) As I go back to the main property I realize I've gone too far and instead of turning around I just go the long way. I cross the fence and come upon the parking lot that surrounds a great hall/convention center. I turn right to continue my loop but I see a busy road I must cross and I don't feel confident doing so in a golf cart. I turn back and meet another busy street, so I head north. Driving north I am a man and there is a woman I know in the passengers seat. She loves speed and thrills. We start to go very fast and I see her suspended body in the rear view mirror as if I am driving a limo. As we hit bumps her body seems to suspend in zero gravity. We are going very fast, now in the golf cart, and we crash. I am not hurt nor did I fear being hurt, but I do fear she has been obliterated. Even in the toss and roll of the crash she is fine. I warn her of the dangers of speed.

I am in a place that reminds me of a desert but its pleasantly warm and there is some plant life about.

I'm with one girl but there are many people about, we get our picture taken.
We are all waiting on a ride back to somewhere.

Suddenly a large elephant comes up, rumbling along. I am extremely excited as soon as I see him. He is yellow and greenish hue. Very warm spirit I can feel.

He lowers for us all to climb atop him, Im in this line moving along then on him. at first he starts gliding along Im not sure how. Then when we get away from the streets and start trekking towards a more forestry area.
He lifts up and the motion you expect to have while riding a elephant takes places. I am ecstatic.

Now I'm seeing from a higher view in the sky, The elephant has this mante ray flowy skin that is rippling in his movement like scales, sorta looks like he is gliding but I can see his legs from underneath. He is going up this cliff bouncing a long. its jungle and mountainy like.

Every time he jumps to and from a spot the previous spots crumbles from where his feet were. Not completely disintegrating but falling to a lower plane.

I remember seeing a small giraffe like creature at some point as well, before I got on the elephant.

There was an elephant walking in the desert looking for water. It was able to sense water with its trunk.

Two researchers were in a deep hole. One had on a blue dress that was making it look like water was in the hole. It created the look of the sun reflecting ripples off of water.

I was looking at this from the perspective of being in the hole. I could see it looked like water, and I was sad that it was a trick. The elephant put its trunk towards the hole, and then in the hole looking for the water.

The end of the trunk didn't look exactly like an elephants trunk. It was too round.

dream : comments : lucid

23rd of November, 2011

I was watching/starring in some TV show called Melrose's Place. It was this really 90's sitcom about this monster chick named Melrose who had dreadlocks and wore cargo pants and was generally pretty awesome. She was like a person in a costume, or a muppet or something. But cooler looking.

-----

Tom Hanks and Rachel Weisz were sitting on an elephant. A narrator said "There was their world, and then three more..."
It was like a poster or a trailer for a cool sci-fi, drama, fantasy type movie, and when I woke up I thought it sounded pretty deep. Like a translation from old Indian scripture or something.

A week ago I had a very strange non-lucid dream about tigers riding on the back of elephants. It was actually a stampede of elephants, running across streets. I made this very raw depiction of my dream (see illustration, the elephants look like cardboard figures but this is unintentional)




In this dream I was a bystander, witnessing the stampede. I know there are stone statues near temples in India of tigers riding on the back of elephants, but it's meaning is unknown to me. Can someone please (on short notice) enlighten me and tell me if there's any symbolic reference to certain events or if this has anything to do with me. It is very important to me.

I was facing a girl with brown skin, wearing tribal clothing (middle eastern style). She flashed a few cards with various images on them in front of my face. The one that I remember was one of a large eye. I looked closer, thinking at first it was a photo of a whale's eye, then realizing it was an elephant's eye. It seemed meaningful to me at the time (I recently read a story that had elephants in it..).

I walked outside to go see the elephants - the first one I saw was HUGE, and deformed, something was weird with the trunk...and it was behind a fence made of what looked like railroad ties (horizontally placed between fenceposts).
Someone was next to me and we walked along the fence, and saw more and more ENORMOUS animals, which I understood to be dinosaurs.

I wondered how such a small fence could keep such huge creatures out, and I remarked to my companion that they were just so huge it was hard to believe they were real, but they were! Further along the fence I noticed a velociraptor approaching. I stepped under a white plastic awning that covered a section of the top tier of the fence. The velociraptor was exactly where I was, and I felt/saw/heard it hop up on top of the plastic thing I was under, and over the fence.

I thought I would be safest staying there, then thought better of it. I noticed now there was a crowd of people rushing back into the building I had just come out of, which now looked like a Church of Christ building I went to when I was a kid. Someone handed a baby to me and I don't remember what I did with it....

I made it in and went to the wall, where there was a line of elevators. An authority -type person (minister? pastor?) was trying to calm people down by giving a sermon on the ups and downs and tragedies of life, saying something like, "we ask ourselved, how COULD this happen?"

I was thinking...really we could be questioning our thoughts here...and I pushed a button that opened all of the elevators, and light poured into the room.

The crowd of people turned toward me and chastised me for bringing in the light, that it was going to attract the velociraptor. I felt bad, thinking, "Oh, I made another wrong decision, I keep making the wrong choices."

***Yesterday my purse was stolen from my car. I did (and am continuing to do) a lot of self-inquiry...I felt the feelings of fear really deeply...I questioned my thinking about the whole thing. I am practicing the model that THIS is a dream, is a hologram, and anything that really rattles me is a reflection of what I am attached to as being real, and identifying as a small self, separate from "God" or "Source".

I blessed the person who stole my purse, took responsibility for my part, acknowledged that *I* created the whole situation.

I did beat up on myself a bit for being stupid and leaving my purse in the car, and for suspending my phone service so quickly (I fantasized that maybe I could have caught the person if they used the phone...).

Before I went to sleep, I asked for a dream to show me what I could learn from the situation. My take on this dream, is that the dinosaurs that seem so huge and terrifying and real, are fears...that are NOT real. Also, dinosaurs represent the old, the ancient, the extinct. Not sure what is up with the deformed elephant and I'm open to suggestion.

The elevators reflect to me taking action that brings in the light, that other parts of me fear, because bringing in the light seems to attract those scary monsters. I second-guessed my actions last night, but the dream shows me that I made the right choice and that the pushback is just fear, and the fear is of something illusory and unreal.

The Lion Tamer

i'm an elephant at the circus and the lion tamer wants me to jump through a ring of fire but i'm too tired