All DJ Entries

Semi-lucidity! Trying shapeshifting.
In the beginning there was some sort of scary things, it was like a catalog of drugs that make your dreams insane with illustrations of what you could see, most notably a drug that is some sort of mineral which looks like some really demonic face with a mouth stretched down for meters, an unhealthy reddish skin and dead white eyes, and it made you see faces like that in your dream. Then it was somewhat about Subnautica. But then I was at home and suddenly I had a small amount of heightened awareness that it might be a dream. Then there was a sort of puppet but it was alive and I brought it into a room and closed the door to protect us from something. We went outside again and there were intimidating people and it was also like I read something bad about them. They said something I don't remember. I went past them and at the window were also some intimidating people I couldn't get past. I went back to the room.

I don't remember the part right before it, but I knew I was dreaming and did multiple reality checks and they all told me I was in a dream, so, now aware, I thought of something to do. The dream was very unclear and I totally forgot about stabilizing, but didn't even notice, so this was at most semi-lucid. I went to a mirror and tried transforming into a dragon. I didn't manage to do it at all since I hadn't at all had a visualization of the dragon I'd want to transform in. I tried doing it by looking to the mirror and back once I had an idea of what I wanted. As it didn't work after multiple attempts I just tried a tail at first, and that worked... somewhat. I didn't really take the right idea at all from the beginning anyway. The tail was there, but it was numb and had no feeling. And it was green, and I wanted it blue, so I just looked away and back again, and there it was blue. Then I just sort of gave up. I went away to see if I could manage to breathe fire at the people I couldn't get past, but I just forgot about it and tried to do something else. At some point I lost lucidity somewhat and slightly fell back into the plot about these demonic faces. Then I got excited over something and I woke up quite a lot. I then remembered the shapeshifting tutorial, and I wanted to do it. I remembered dream chaining, laid completely still, aaaaanddd... my parents managed to wake me up on accident.

---

Glad to know my practice is working. Not sure what to improve for next time, though. Maybe I should just continue as usual with my practice.

9th June 2020

Catching up on DJ again.

Dream:

(last part, my original notes sort of start at the end but cycle back to this point in some way)

Was in a WoW-like game or reality. There was this nest on a cliff I had to reach from this insanely long ladder along another cliff face. I wasn't sure how high I had to climb before I'd be able to make the jump towards the nest.

At some point I jumped and I remember sort of gliding a bit, eventually reaching the nest. I remember noticing a book covered in twigs and small bones. I looked this up on a popular WoW database to read comments on either the book or this location. Then I wiped it clean (from what? dust?) but don't recall what happened after that.

Some guy riding a bear mount? Not sure. Then I remember myself, taking off the ground on a nether drake. I flew up a bit but not that much. There were Shattrath guards following after me through a forest that was not like Terokkar next to the city. The guards were throwing hammers of wrath at me as they pursued, most hitting me but doing little damage although this was whittling my health points away.

I knew we were still in the Outlands because there was a cliff's edge, and nothing but void beyond and below; I remember the characteristic Nagrand-like sky. I rode my drake over this threshold of sorts and from past the edge, looped under the floating land mass, hiding there with my drake in some sort of underground cave area...

I saw blood elves fly over and away on their bloodhawks toward the endless horizon and void. The distraction worked and I lost them. Then I left the bottomless "cave" underground and went much higher than before. Something was happening and a massive black dragon was appearing and the sky also dramatically changed to darkness and red tones. There was some NPC shouting something, but I don't remember what. I remember having passing thoughts about Deathwing and Alextstraza and how they looked feral with their "old/out of date" models.

Then I remember flying toward the dragon and at some point jumping off the back of my drake and landing on a platform (on the dragon?). There, I found blocks like in Boundless. Interesting patterned blocks, like mosaic and celtic twist patterns on stone and they had red and black colour schemes. I began to "vein mine" the blocks the vein mining technique eventually stopped working and so I gave up on harvesting these interesting blocks.

The next part I remember, I had ended up on a red dragon's back. We fly over mountains and cliffs and from here I spot the nest and jump off, gliding through the air somehow and trying to land on the nest. Instead, the winds lead me to the ladder.

---

Notes:
- I think it was in this dream; the area in which I found the bear mount rider was something like the WoW zone Grizzly Hills, with tall pine-like trees.
- The way my original notes were made have altered my memory of how the dream's chronology worked out but at the same time it has created a nearly perfect cyclical flow of the dream which did lead me to remembering details I otherwise may not have recalled that morning.
- The black dragon may have appeared before I thought of Deathwing, but I believe the two would have come in tandem regardless of which appeared first.
- This dream involved a lot of flying or gliding and basically high altitude locations with little solid ground to speak of. In the dream and game worlds I don't typically ever have a fear of heights, despite the fact that in reality they make me feel uncomfortable as I become highly aware that a mistake could cost me, fatally so even.
- Over the last few months I have had passing thoughts of the Burning Crusade and about nether drakes, so this dream probably came about as a materialisation of that or as a self-feeding experience.

I tried to have a WILD this morning but fell asleep instead, but nevertheless I had a dild upon having a hand rc and realized I'm dreaming, although it was more of a semi lucid state. I knew that I'm dreaming but thats all that I knew, and wasn't really conscious of anything else at this point.
I was outside infront of my house under a large tree. I started to use the force to move the branches around, I finally succeeded. I regained my connection to the force. I felt this intense vibration in my hands, head and in the air as I stretched my hand out to the large branch of tree , it was something special.
Then I thought it's time to do something. So I started to go towards the local mall, for some reason that seemed to be a nice place to experiment around.
On the way out I met with my friend, so we decided to go together there.. First I thought I'd jump on one of the cars to ease our transportation since walking is a bit hectic, especially in a lucid dream.
the place was vacant, it was winter, snow covered the streets. the sky was almost pink . There was some sorts of barricade of cars there, we started to climb through the debris , then we were ambushed by what I suspected to be a krayt dragon, or some sort of dragon ,it was thin but nevertheless big and caused much panic.
I reacted quickly I waved hand signs and blew fire onto the dragon, it seemed to have hurt it and it went away...I was like "damn ,even my fire element ability has came back too!"

After that my lucidity really faded and I lost recall

2019, 11-01

Regular Dream - Video Game / Semi-lucid - Lucid Dream - Notes

Skyrim: Dragon Falling

Note: I have been including a lot more detail than I really have time for, so I will try to be a bit more succinct about my journal entries to allow for more postings.

I am playing Skyrim VR. I am in Whiterun, I am here to deliver the dragonstone to Farengar. I go to Dragonsreach and go to Farengar inside. He is talking to Delphine. I comment that the warrior innkeeper is back. Delphine gives me a strange look. Farengar takes the dragonstone and then the housecarl Irileth comes in to say there’s a dragon attacking. She says Farengar and I should come. As we are leaving the room I pass by Delphine and deliberately comment, “It’s too bad we don’t have any sworn dragon slayers around…” as I look at Delphine. This gets me another strange look from her, then she hurries off.

I go up to talk to Jarl Balgruuf. He says he wants me to help fight the dragon. He even gives me an electrically charged sword. I head to the Western Watchtower where the dragon is attacking. Irileth and several guards come with me. Mirmulnir is attacking the tower. I realize my new sword, or any sword, is useless. I use Battery by Metallica to call lightning down on Mirmulnir. Guards are firing arrows at the dragon. I pause to wonder how Battery is working in Skyrim when Mirmulnir targets me with a blast of fire. I stop questioning and use Whiplash by Metallica to deflect the fire back at Mirmulnir. The dragon is hit by fire and lightning at the same time and crashes to the ground. Irileth jumps onto his head and drives her sword in, killing him. For a bit I think I won’t get the energy rush as usual, but when I get closer I am able to draw the energy in.

After the guards and Irileth debate if I could be dragonborn I head back to Whiterun to report success against the dragon. I hear the Greybeards call as I return to Whiterun. I tell Balgruuf that the dragon is dead and he gives me some heavy armor… I don’t use heavy armor… then I leave. I sell the armor at a local blacksmith since I never use heavy armor. Everyone is saying I should go straight to see the Greybeards, but I always head down to Windhelm after this so I can stop the serial killer there before he kills another victim. I leave Whiterun and head along the road to Windhelm. On the way I find Cicero and his broken wagon wheel. Instead of asking the farmer to help I use a Harry Potter spell, reparo, to fix the wheel myself. He does a happy dance and gives me gold before heading off. I wake up wondering how I didn’t do a reality check when I successfully used Battery and Whiplash in a game of Skyrim.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

A big fat dragon is walking downtown and smashing houses like Godzilla but more by accident. Me and Zilla are trying to avoid it but he seems to go wherever we go. We end up at some derelict buildings by the docks and we bump into a dozen dudes, who are doing shady businesses, and they surround us, menacing. I say we have no idea who they are and what they are doing, but they couldn't care less. So I fly and pick a stick that is lying around and I hit them with it. Zilla runs away. We reach an area with more people around and they let us go.

Staying at some foreign country with colleagues from worldwide. We are working on a lab and sharing amenities. I have a nice room for myself, but have to share bathroom with another lady, but still it is very comfortable.
At the lab some days I work with two guys. One whom I know and another one who is a stranger and has been harassing me. I know what he is capable of, because he is a sexual offender and I am creeped out whenever I need to be alone with him.
Well, he works with radioactive material and he has to go inside a chamber where materials are deposited. One day, I am by chance at a place from where I can see that my colleague locks him up in that chamber, which cannot be opened from the inside. I am shocked but I do not help the creepy guy. I think we are actually better without him. He only needs to stay locked for some minutes before the radiation reaches deadly levels.
I stay put and do nothing. Meanwhile a group of visiting researchers, who had been out for a city tour, are coming back to the lab and I go meet them and stall them while I know my colleague is re-opening the door of the chamber, to cover up his action. This way people will think the dude fainted there and got too much radiation by accident. I just wander what he is going to do regarding the security tapes. If they just disappear people will know it wasn't an accident. Anyway, I cannot be implicated.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

Attending Rinpoche's teachings but I am extremely sleepy. At some point I even get up and take a break. When I come back Rinpoche is gone.
The teachings are followed by nightly entertainment. Some girl comes to me with silly talk and I yell at her that all that is total bullshit, but I am not angry, more like amused with whatever she said. We see a pretty light display in the sky. Laser projections of a spaceship flying among planets and other cute things. The display is attracting people uphill through a dirt road. it is very dark, no electric lights. Then the path ends at some kind of three walled dead end with soviet movies being projected on the wall. It's cool, until a huge number of people keep coming uphill and pushing the ones already at the dead end. People start to panic, feeling claustrophobic, pushing each other. I feel panic too but I believe there is some door somewhere and after a while I find a door at the corner to my left. We open it and people start exiting with relief. Outside is actually an inside of a venue and there are people looking at the panel with info by the door, about the exhibition we just came from. They want to come in, but we tell them not to, that people are actually needing to get out from there.

Morning and people are departing on different buses. I am on a bus already leaving and see some familiar faces outside, sitting on the sidewalk waiting for a different bus. I see monks leaving the venue in another direction. Then I get lucid and get rid of the backpack I have on my lap. Accidentally, I hit a lady on her head with it, but I realize that if I don't care because she is a dream character, she will not react. And surely she doesn't. I get up from my sit and simply get through the glass window, but don't fly away. Instead I hang in the there, in the window frame, feeling the wind and enjoying the landscape. The bus is crossing a very high bridge and it's very vertiginous, but I like it. I make the bus go steeply up and down like a roller-coaster just for fun. The other passengers don't seem very please, but I keep reminding that they aren't real. Then the bus passes by a Bullfighting museum and I get the impression we are in Spain. I get out of the bus and get in the museum and start trashing it all using only telekinesis and chi blasts. It's very satisfying. Especially seeing the visitors of such dreadful place being blasted away. As I go deeper into this place, I pass some kind of patio with really beautiful stone floor, but the stones are very uneven and I am barefoot. I make some shoes appear on my feet and go deeper. Pass to a weirder area of this building, sort of descending to its catacombs and it gets sinister.[/COLOR] Most rooms I avoid, as they look familiar and I sense very creepy energy in them. Then I see a long staircase descending deep into the earth. The stairs and the walls look very organic. I sense danger too, but do not feel so much fear. I am attacķed by a dragon coming from the depths. I find some knight armors and other stuff lying around and I think I kill the dragon. Some weird creature, like an elf appears and says because I killed the dragon I am the heir of some saint or knight that fought dragons.
Then I find an exit to outside and I am at a train station, clearly at some Mediterranean town. Very pitoresque, very peaceful, very soothing. The weather is extremely nice but very cloudy. The clouds are luminous and the air is very light. I feel like singing and dancing and without any agenda, I just make love with the air and everything around me. I think of the guru and feel that he is all around me.

2019, 07-11

Regular Dream - Semi-lucid Dream - Lucid Dream - Notes

I am playing Skyrim VR, starting at the beginning. Ralof is across from me, Ulfric is to my right, Lokir is across from Ulfric. Lokir is being extremely rude. He won’t shut and two out of every three words is an expletive. He is directing his torrent of obscenity at Ulfric, who is completely ignoring him. Ralof tries to tell Lokir not to talk to the rightful high king of Skyrim like that, but gives up. Lokir sees me staring at him and takes a break from Ulfric to curse at me. I ask if he talks to his mother with that filthy mouth. He gives me one final, “Fuck you!” before going back to cursing at Ulfric.

We arrive in Helgen and stop. I see the Imperial Captain and say to no one in particular that I really wish I could fus her ass. I look at Ulfric. He could fus her. I say I’ll get that gag off of him if he’ll fus the Captain. He looks at me strangely. Did he hear me? But other characters can’t hear what I say, they only hear the dialog choices I make… But then Lokir had seemed to hear me, too… wtf? Did I add a mod that includes voice recognition and explicit language?

Ulfric and Ralof are on the list, then Lokir insists he’s not a (expletives) Stormcloak and he hates that (expletives) traitor Ulfric. The Captain doesn’t believe him so he then turns his expletives on her, calling her a list of rude names I won’t repeat even though I agree with them. He then makes a run for it and is shot in the back by an archer. Hadvar says my name isn’t on the list, but the Captain says I should be killed anyway. Lokir used every expletive in the book, so I settle with telling the Captain to go fus herself. I would love to be able to fus her right off of a cliff.

Alduin swoops over the town, bathing everything in fire. I follow Ralof into the closest tower. Ralof and Ulfric and a few other Stormcloaks come out the hole in the wall, though after a blast of fire from Alduin the other Stormcloaks are either killed or separated leaving Ralof, Ulfric, and me. Hadvar and the Captain attack Ulfric specifically, saying he’s not getting away. I get to see the Captain get fus’d after all. Ulfric fus’s her right as Alduin makes another pass, so she gets fus’d and then toasted! I exclaim, “That was AWESOME!” Ulfric looks at me like he thinks I’m insane. He can hear me! I’d better watch what I say or everyone in Skyrim will think I’m a total psycho.

The rest of the opening quest goes pretty normal except for Ulfric is with Ralof and me. Then we are out and Ulfric wants to know if I know what fus means. “Of course I do, it means force. Ro means balance, dah means push. Now if I can just kill a few dragons I can do my own fus’ing…” Alduin flies overhead. “But not that one… I’m not ready for that one yet.” So the sooner I head off the Whiterun the sooner I will get the first word! I head down the path then wake up.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

In a studio with Billy Corgan and Dave Grohl. There's a problem with ticks, I go to the toilet and find bloody paper and a giant bug roaming around.

With friends at a café in Lisbon, a fancy place. Nuno Markl passes by with a shopping bag, we can see he bought two pink pullovers and that another man just passing by him is wearing a similar pullover. We laugh at the popularity of these pullovers and he looks at us. I wave and he looks puzzled as if finding me familiar but not knowing who I am.
Then we go down the street, I am dressed like a Jedi, sort of. Then crossing the street becomes a challenge as the road gives place to a very steep hill that we have to climb. I stick a dagger on the ground so I can climb and the mountain moves because it is a dragon.

I am staying at a house with others, one guy is clearly specialist in ancient Greek myths. I am a biologist on some project. I take a look at some papers describing a synthetic biology project that is taking place in some Asian country where the laws are not restrictive and they talk about growing tissues and limbs. Reminds me a video my mom had sent me, I decide I will share these documents with the guys from that video so we can discuss the project.

2019, 05-02

Regular Dream - Semi-lucid Dream - Lucid Dream - Notes

Note: When I have video game dreams they tend to be long and detailed, which is one thing I like about them. I also seem to be very slow to realize it's a dream and not a game, which is frustrating.

I am playing Skyrim VR. I am starting a new game, I am riding in the back of the cart with Ralof across from me and Ulfric to my right, but I look to where I expect Lokir to be and instead of him there is a woman. The woman is glaring at Ulfric like she would really enjoy gouging his eyes out and feeding them to him. I am surprised to see the difference, I think there must be some random factor to the fourth person in the cart when starting a new game. She tells Ulfric she won’t kill him until he begs her to. Ulfric completely ignores her, not even looking at her. Ralof tells her to watch her mouth when speaking to Ulfric Stormcloak.

The woman briefly glares at him, then she sees I’m staring at her. She turns her glare on me. I return her glare, giving my best effort at a Vegeta (Dragonball Z) glare. She says if I even think about getting in her way she’ll rip off my face and wipe her ass with it. This strikes me as funny and I start laughing. She looks confused. I ask what her name is, she says her name is Varlin, and I’d better not forget it. I tell her she wins, and as soon as I learn the three word fus, she has won herself a place on the top of my list of people to fus off of a cliff. She looks at me strangely again, she clearly does not know what a fus is. Ulfric, on the other hand, is now looking over at me, but he can’t say anything because he is gagged.

Varlin returns her glare to Ulfric, who is still staring at me. I say that knowing my luck Alduin will eat Varlin, denying me my fus. And then Alduin will probably die from eating something that nasty. This earns another brief glare from Varlin and Ulfric’s eyes get wider. It sounds like he tries to say something, but then looks frustrated and growls, still staring at me. I want to know what he has to say so I stand up, and even though my hands are tied in front of me, I reach to take the gag off. A guard riding beside the cart gets closer and uses the blunt end of his spear to push me away from Ulfric, making me fall on the floor of the cart on my ass. He says if I try that again it won’t be the blunt end he strikes me with.

We get to Helgen and everyone gets out of the cart. Varlin immediately takes action. She has somehow freed her hands. She moves lightning fast and snatches a sword from a guard, and before he can even look her way she has run it through his chest from behind. She says she came to kill Ulfric, but now she wants to kill me first. She seems to think that will be easy since I’m still tied. I really want to fus her. So I do. I let out a full three word fus, “FUS-RO-DAH!” right in her face. And it works! She is launched backwards into the stone wall that surrounds Helgen. I have surprised myself, I didn’t think I could do that yet! A glitch? Nice glitch!

General Tullius arrives with Elenwen riding a horse close behind. Tullius asks what in Oblivion is going on, some people say Varlin killed a guard, more say Ulfric shouted at Varlin, and others say I shouted at Varlin. Tullius looks to where Varlin landed, but she is gone. He then looks at Ulfric, then at me. My cool down for shouting has finished, so I tell Tullius I have a message from Thorald Gray-Mane, and the message is, “Fus you.” He looks puzzled, then I fus him in the face. Now Tullius flies through the air and crashes into Elenwen, knocking her off of her horse. The two fall to the ground in a heap, they land in a pile of poop just dropped by Elenwen’s horse. I start laughing. This glitch is too fun!

These changes don’t delay Alduin’s arrival. He swoops over the tower and breathes fire. People start running, my ability to shout is no longer important. Tullius gets up and starts organizing a defense, all unarmed and bound prisoners make a run for cover. I turn towards Alduin and let out a fus. It does little more than surprise him, and he replies with a blast of fire. Ulfric grabs me and pulls me towards cover, his hands are free and his gag is off. He says if that’s really the World Eater, Unrelenting Force will do nothing to him. I think Ralof is the one who is supposed to come back for me, not Ulfric, and I ask where Ralof is. Ralof is on my other side, he says he’s right there and all three of us go into the tower.

Now things follow the normal path from Skyrim, notable differences being Ulfric says he has to make sure the other Stormcloaks get out safely, but Ralof will make sure I get out ok. And he wants to talk to me more, but that will have to wait. If we don’t see each other again here he will be in Windhelm. Ralof comes out the hole in the wall with me, at no time did I follow Hadvar or even see him. On the way through the tunnels under Helgen and out the back way I am completely fus-happy, these are people I’ve never gotten to fus before. The Imperial Captain who orders the player be executed even though their name isn’t on the list got fus’d repeatedly until dead. I follow Ralof to Riverwood and into his sister’s house where I collapse on a bed. That start was new, now to take off my VR headset… I’m not wearing one? Does that mean I’m dreaming? I never even get to RC before I wake.

29/04/2019

This was a great night because it was the first time I recalled 4 dreams, for me this is a new record. the first two that I'll write were more vivid and longer than the other two.
I think that happened because I was on holiday and I slept very well in my own bad.

..................................................

Pee problems

I'm a boy, it's night and I'm at home in my bathroom. I'm standing in front of the toilet with the urge to pee but I can't, after a wile I try I start worrying about my health, so I call a doctor to come and help me.

A doctor arrives with her white coat on, she has brown and wavy hair that falls over her shoulders.
She gives me a pill that should solve my problem, I swallow it and then I sit down.
the doctor look at me in a strange way and asks me if I'm okay, I tell her I'm fine and then I fall to the ground unconscious.

I wake up a few seconds later and stand up, now I'm a girl again, I'm myself again. I go to the bathroom and pee successfully.

I wake with a start thinking I have wet the bed, fortunately it didn't happen.



fighting a dragon

Me and another boy are fighting a red dragon under the supervision of a magician who can be Gandalf the white (yes I watched the lord of the rings that night).
We are in an enclosed place, it looks like an artificial underground river with a vaulted concrete roof, the river that flows below un and laterally a raised platforms where you can walk with side exit.

But the battle with the dragon isn't real, because every time we made a mistake in strategy and the dragon defeats us by growing us away Gandalf save us and brings us back restarting the fight from where it ended, giving us the opportunity to find a new strategy.
It's more like a workout.

the other guy and I are hanging by chains at the riverbank while the dragon, breaking through the wall, has come out by one of the side doors.
I start to the eight and to the left until I get high enough to kick the dragon on his head. but it wasn't so effective because the dragon kick me in return and I and up on the other side of the river.
the dragon himself, snapping, comes to save me before I touch the wall and Gandalf tells him: " I was taking her ".
but now the dragon had grabbed me and brought me back on the other side to resume the fighting again.


cuddles

I'm at home sitting in my room in front of my desk, it's evening and in front of me there is my little white budgie hanging out on my desk.
at certain point I take it in hands and start caressing him, initially he screams and wants to run away, but after a while he understands that I don't hurt him and he relaxes letting himself being cuddled.
I put it on the table and continue to do the scratching behind his head.

then I take it downstairs and I put him in his cage with the other budgies.



secret agents

I'm a secret agent and I'm on a mission with another companion. it's night and we are dressed all in black, we are almost invisible.
we are in a place that seems a construction site and we have to sneak into a cubic building to steal something but it seems to have no income.

Morning of January 1, 2018. Monday.

Reading time: 1 min 28 sec. Readability score: 61.



I find myself in an unfamiliar, unknown movie theater where most of the audience is wearing 3-D glasses, though I am not wearing any. I see no one I recognize. In the movie, two serpentine dragons face each other, each of them unwilling to either move aside or to strike at the other. Eventually, I do not discern any movement on the movie screen. I think about leaving, as I consider this still scene will last about 2 hours, which will be an unreasonable waste of time. From the middle of the row in about the fourth row back, I get up and walk to the left to another area, ending up behind the movie screen in what looks like the inside of a warehouse. I perceive it as “my” bedroom. The mattress is worn and has no sheet. The headboard has horizontal wooden planks that are in a slightly irregular arrangement. Bette Davis comes in and asks me if I know where her husband is and rolls her eyes at me, also quickly glancing left and right, and walks away before I say anything. Puzzled, I slowly wake.

---

This dream occurred because:

My infra-self, having been satiated in previous dream sequences of apex lucidity, chooses to remain passive and non-lucid for a time, and so my dream space becomes a movie theater where I only watch. By not wearing 3-D glasses as most of the other patrons are, I am subliminally declining the potential for realism as well. (The movie is part of “Dragon Wars” from 2007.) However, RAS activity eventually pauses by way of emerging infra-control from subliminal intent. From here, subliminal awareness of being asleep in bed increases to passive liminality and I enter the warehouse area, which represents the temporary storage of transitory ideas that occur in REM sleep. I subliminally summon Bette Davis as the dream’s preconscious avatar as an influence from the song “Bette Davis Eyes” as an association with REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep. She is not “looking for her husband” but seeks to initiate my waking-life identity (which is what RAS mediation is). Aware that the bed “behind” me is the bed I am already in, in sleep, I wake.

---

As usual, I find myself lucid in a dream without being able to remember how it happened. I am on a stage, a raised platform at one end of a tall, rectangular room with no windows and a door at the far end—picture a racquetball court and you’ll have a pretty good idea of the layout and size. The area where I am is lit while the area where the audience is sitting is darker, with some light shining in from the doorway.

I’m singing up here and simultaneously trying my hardest to get my bouzouki to show up so I can accompany myself on it. I look around the stage area periodically, whenever I get the chance, but it just doesn’t seem to be turning up. I notice a couple guys in the audience heading for the door. Annoyed, I will them back to their seats, but they seem to sense what I’m doing and bolt. Oh, well.

In the meantime, though, my efforts to materialize myself some accompaniment seem to have paid off. There is now an array of stringed and fretted instruments in the center of the stage, a dozen or so, leaning against stands or lying on chairs. Many of them are exotic instruments I don’t recognize, and unfortunately, there doesn’t seem to be a bouzouki among them. I settle for the closest match— some kind of lute, judging by the angled neck and larger body. Maybe I can intend it to have a string configuration I can work with. I pick it up and sit down in the chair it was on to play. I was singing “Greensleeves” before, and so I start again from the beginning, this time accompanying myself.

Alas, my love, you do me wrong
To cast me off discourteously…

This is more like it. It seems to work best if I don’t focus too much on what I’m doing with my hands and let it take care of itself, like a spot of localized non-lucidity.

Partway through the song, though, I find myself in another room—there seems to be a small memory gap, but I’m guessing this was a false awakening I managed to identify as another dream straightaway. This room is very similar to the one I was just in—it could be the same one if not for the lack of a raised stage area and the fact that there is now a door where the opening was. It’s a metal door painted bright green.

The room is empty apart from a mat on the floor which is furnished like a bed. Looking at it stirs faint memories of sleepovers with friends—nice memories, ones I haven’t thought about in a long time. Much of the wooden floor is covered by a rug patterned with dragons—the Asian sort—in red, blue and green. As I look at it, they move and shift in mesmerizing ways, and the perspective flattens a little as the rug occupies my field of vision. I think to myself: I’m dreaming, I’m dreaming. I don’t want to get so absorbed in it that I lose awareness.

I look away to consider the door and what might be beyond it. Thoughts come to me—memories, almost, if I took them more seriously—of rooms and people beyond. But that’s a rather serious-looking door.

I wake up.

(11.7.18)

Morning of April 29, 2018. Sunday.



There are puzzling (impersonal) scenes of an unfamiliar golf course, which is a very rare dream setting for me. There is an unusual dragon, more like a traditional sea serpent in some ways, but quite unrealistic and never a threatening presence - almost cartoonish or of bad CGI. Corporeally, I find myself in an area where grapes are growing from vines within tree branches. I eventually find a pocket watch hanging by a chain from a low branch. An unfamiliar red-haired female of about thirty manifests as this dream’s preconscious, looking at me, possibly wondering what I am doing. I think I might take the watch as I think it might be mine, but I decide to leave it.

---

I had no idea we would be watching a movie this evening featuring an unrealistic sea serpent and a scene where two men were digging in a golf course. This was “Nessie & Me” (2017) that our youngest daughter really wanted to watch tonight (and it was from the library; I did not even know about it). Seeing scenes from movies in dreams before actually seeing them seems a rather trivial and pointless mechanism (in contrast to me marrying my literal dream girl), but this has occurred all my life. It happens so often, I usually just roll my eyes at this stage of my life. It is probably more about the transpersonal interconsciousness rendering some dream content (rather than true prescience), as the movie technically often already exists (though not in every case like this) which I usually see on the same day after my dream. Zsuzsanna had not seen the movie, so the golf course scene did not come from her as far as I know.

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Fragment

I saw a blurred out feminine face.

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Cloud dragon and rainbows

I saw a family living in a village, their house was always clean, well organised, and it was modernly furnished. Out of all the family members I could see only mother and her son. The kid was hiding and escaping from something all the time, there was something he was afraid to say to his mom. She knew that he had some kind of a problem and they were constantly arguing about it. One night the kid ran upstairs to his room in a hurry, his mother followed him and suddenly they were teleported away from their house. They ended up on a cloud, there were many cloud islands and rainbows were linking them like bridges. The mother shouted to her son: "What have you done this time?!" and then suddenly a dragon composed of clouds flied above them and said "I brought you here!".

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WBTB Attempt

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Wedding, shootout and "Shogudan" immigrants

I woke up in my neighbor's house, put on shorts and slippers, and then left the house. It was a bright, sunny day. As I passed the street, two girls noticed me and started laughing upon seeing me almost naked. I ignored that and moved on to my house. The place was extremely crowded, two kids were about to marry each other and it gathered a lot of people. I went inside my house and spoke with several people, when suddenly kidnappers appeared and took the kids! I took a pistol out of my pocket and ran outside. The time of day abruptly changed to night and I wasn't in my house any more, but in some kind of harbour. I shot at the car a thousand times, completely destroying it's tires, but it still drove away. After a while police appeared and arrested me. Next day they opened the cell I was held in, one of the officers said: "All right, there's no place in our country for terrorist Shogudan immigrants. You will be deported!", but then another officer appeared and shouted at them: "What the hell are you doing? You've just arrested our best agent!", then he gave me a badge and a gun.

2017, 06-24

Nerimeno?

I am in a wide open green field. I look around to try to figure out where I am. I have no idea how I came to be here and I find that strange. I am thinking about doing a reality check when someone calls my name. I turn and see a man there with me, he looks Mexican and he also looks annoyed. He asks what I’m doing here. Without waiting for an answer, he says I’m not invited here, so I’d better get out before he gets really mad. I don’t find his threat very concerning so I just look at him. He seems to have an aura of dark energy, it looks like he is using dark energy. But what about his inner flame? I am seeing unstable dark energy that needs to be stable so I think I should use a song to help restore his inner flame and stabilize his energy. He asks what I’m looking at, then says my time is up. He’s going to kick my ass and he doesn’t care if I’m lucid!

He attacks me with a dark energy blade that he forms out of nowhere, moving as fast as lightning. I form my right arm into an Alex Mercer blade and block the attack. I am thinking I had better get his dark energy stabilized before someone gets hurt. I focus on the song Iron by Within Temptation to try to stabilize his dark energy by giving him a dark inner flame. “You can't live without the fire, it's the heat that makes you strong! 'Cause you're born to live and fight it all the way! You can't hide what lies inside you, it's the only thing you've known, you'll embrace it now and never walk away, don't walk away!” A circle of purple flames surrounds the man, burning up high all around him. The fire is absorbed into the man and is gone. I am wondering if that did any good.

I am approaching the man to check closer when a portal opens in the sky. A creature comes through the portal, it looks like a humanoid dragon, or a man with dragon wings… I see that the creature is bigger than any human I have ever seen, and it looks pissed. It flies out of the portal and speaks in a growling demonic sounding voice, its eyes glowing a demonic red color. The dragon snarls that Hukif belongs to him and he won’t have some fool like me coming in and interfering. I ask who the fuck he is and he says he is the one who will destroy me for my interference. The song by Within Temptation is still going on, and I direct the next part at the dragon. “You need not fear me, unless you are a dark heart… A vile one who preys on the innocent. I promise, you can't hide forever in the empty darkness, for I will hunt you down like the monster you are and pull you into the very bowels of hell!” The dragon comes at me, attacking pretty straight forward. It is clear to me that he doesn’t consider me a threat at all. I focus on the song Enter Sandman by Metallica and hit him with alternating dark and light energy that explodes like a mixture of matter and antimatter. He shouldn’t have underestimated me!

After the explosion clears I don’t see the dragon any more. I’m sure I didn’t vaporize the dragon, I could tell he was more powerful than that. Apparently I took him by surprise, however, and he has taken off to reconsider his plan of attacking me. The man there with me, the dragon had called him Hukif, is still more pissed at me. He says I need to butt out of other people’s business. He says he has never needed my help in dealing with Nerimeno, and he doesn’t need or want my help now! He tells me to go home and mind my own business. I tell him that as long as he minds his own business, I will do the same. But that means leaving MoSh and his inner world and everyone who lives there alone, too. He scoffs as if he would have no interest in such things but then says fine, if I will go away. I say that’s all I needed to hear. Everything around me fades to black and I wake up.