Recent DJ Posts

19th August 2021

Away from home at the time.

Scraps:

Something about a big drill at the tail end of a dream before waking.

Before that, something more adventure-like.

Another bit about S and A. But S was implied to have died and A was having a conversation with me, telling me all of this. In that moment I realise that was why we hadn't had any contact with her for a long time.

---

21st August 2021

Recall was good at first and dreaming presence was very decent too, lots of dreaming overall, but I was unable to write any recall down initially and it was left too long by the time I had another chance, meaning almost all detail was gone.

Scraps:

Something about dreaming and art.

Last bit just before waking, I'm doing something charitable for someone. I'm somewhere like in Scotland and I remember moving around a fair bit. (in what way?)

---

Notes:

- I cannot know whether my dream realisation about A's husband has any truth or not, since we still haven't spoken. Sadly it's been years since we last spoke.

- Dreaming about dreaming and art probably relates to some of the long-term lucid goals I have.

- I'm not sure if I was still away on the 21st or not, possibly just after I had been.

- I just realised while typing this DJ entry title that our host's husband passed away some years ago, perhaps this was what brought on the dream about A's husband, in some way.

18th February 2021

Dream:

In a version of our home and street. The van is outside and it was open in order for me to do something?

Our street looks like it's part of some city like Paris, I don't know. To the right and beyond where there's that intersecting road, there are much taller buildings. I recall something about having to wait. Maybe I have a backpack. Our front door is open. At several points throughout the dream I alter the colours of our house, both interior and exterior. I remember we have some kind of small tiled mosaic floor. I eventually become satisfied with a sandy colour scheme with red accents.

I remember I see a dream neighbour down the street. He's walking a dog or something and I'm concerned about it pooping near our door, but in reality they are too far for it to matter.

I don't remember what kind of day it is, maybe sunny but light looks overcast. At some point while I'm waiting I get into a random car across the street, it's red maybe? When I get in I'm suddenly on a first floor level, but I don't realise or care about this in the dream. I think at one point I see a man from one of the windows (right side of the car, I was looking out left initially) and we talk.

(recall gap)

The next thing I remember, I'm in a car with two people. I'm on the front passenger side, which is on the right (though I don't realise this in the dream). One person is a man and the other I can't recall. We're in a very busy area of a city like L but bigger, wider roads. We're on a four or five lane road approaching a very complicated and busy intersection.

Me and the man are having a conversation. We're discussing building a computer while the lights are still red. He's apparently from the past and is asking me about how hardware prices have changed and I presume he means over the last twenty years.

In the dream, I think I feel I was in a further future time than in reality. I tell him, some things like USB and other small accessory stuff are a bit cheaper, but not much. Otherwise most other things remain more or less the same but with very good specs.

The lights at this intersection become green and we start going. On the right there's a diagonally intersecting road we're merging with, it has just as many lanes and it's busy too and then there's an ambulance trying to come across from the opposite direction. I am quiet for now to let the driver concentrate, but once we are out of the complex situation, we resume discussion.

Fragment:

Bins and recycling are being collected. I forgot to put things out? And I try to do it then seeing as I still think they're about to collect it. But I don't see the collecting hi-vis people anymore by the time I get outside. Some other people are here, they are looking through bags. They tell me they are from some charity, they mention it by name. I forget what we talk about but I recall they were looking for clothes primarily.

Notes:
- Both sections of the longer dream relate to home in some way. Present home, past home and past-would-be home, I feel.
- The apprehension about the neighbour walking the dog may stem from the fact that lately dogs seem to have taken a liking to our door for doing their needs.
- Somewhat related, the part about re-decorating the house may

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

In Alhandra, helping out an old lady cross the road. Then go to mom's and all the neighbors are at her door because she met Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, who are in Portugal to start a charity. They organized a cookie sale and somehow my mom got involved. For some reason I make plans to seduce Tom Hanks. On one hand I think I don't want to mess with his marriage, as they are a lovely couple, but on the other hand it is stronger than me. So I start applying my subtle charm on him. There is a fundraising lunch and my uncle Francisco is there and chokes on something. Tom goes to the rescue but I am not sure he made it.

Get to a Japanese handmade clothing shop. I've heard wonders about their avant-garde kimonos. I check their catalogue but it is mostly knitted stuff and non of those kimonos. Some girl to my side is really enthusiastic about it, so I hand it over to her and go check instead a chariot they have by the wall with painted banners and dresses. I fall in love with a banner with kanji symbols and a Japanese woman and which reads on top "aqui há gato" (literal translation; there's a cat in here; meaning: something's fishy). I feel it would look awesome on my living room wall. Then they also have long hand painted dresses and I am going crazy for them. I pick one to try out and want to check the rest of them, but some other girls take over and disappear with all the dresses, leaving only cosplay outfits.

7th May

Dream:

Don't remember the start but was in a game doing some crop-related things while I was appearing offline or something. All of a sudden, a female character shows up and starts punching me up with some flying fists. At first I assumed it was A but then I die and respawn and notice it's someone else that I don't know.

It's a Spanish player and we mostly speak in Spanish. I realise my accent is a bit broken but that doesn't stop me so much. I tell her I don't remember knowing her, I assume it's possible I've just forgotten who she is but she doesn't really answer the question or seem bothered by this, anyway. Then she starts telling me how she used to live on some place called something "Peak". In the dream I had some vague memory of it. I ask her if she had a place nearby on K and she insists not, but my dream memory tells me she did.

In any case, she then tells me how she'd lost everything. I realise I don't care about my place so much anymore and offer to give her some stuff and tell her we need to go to my place in the game. Most of this seems to take place on K. We then start going through some portals or something, and I start carrying her on my back for some reason. I remember some other players spotting us and staring for a minute.

Then eventually we're at my old (actual) home, it's night time and dark. I walk into the room that used to be L's and there's an extra bed like a sofa bed. There's a computer with an old CRT screen on the desk and I think about using it to give her some stuff? She asks me some questions and I answer, I think mostly about the room? I think she just looks like a person now and not a game character.

Then all of a sudden while we talk, my sibling T sits up. T had been sleeping on the extra bed all along and we somehow hadn't realised. Looked younger and not so scruffy? I apologise and say I didn't realise. I look at the screen for a moment and it has something like Diablo on it. We leave the room and go to my old room instead. But essentially, the exact same thing happens again there. I don't remember to question the dream-like nature of what just happened. Rest of dream recall is mostly gone. Scraps of being in the street and talking to this Spanish girl.

---

Notes:
- The initial context within the dream of giving my stuff away is a common occurrence anyway when I'm playing games in which you are able to hoard or accumulate stuff. I often end up giving stuff away because I have not created any particular attachment to it or feel like I might not be putting it to good use any time soon. One further note on this regard is that sometimes I feel that my kindness is taken but not appreciated, it becomes "old history" so to speak of rather quickly, with some people, while others do remember it for a long time.
- Although I wrote this dream months ago, I have the feeling that the computer screen in L's room was a CRT, but this may be a false memory now. When I wrote that it has something like Diablo on it, I think I meant that it had Diablo II just running but with nothing happening.

As FK's Nicholas, I saw an image of a vase of white roses, bleeding a few trails of red blood - I believed that this was a hallucination, thinking of it as "a bit of silliness" - and then I saw a mental image of Janette lying on a white couch, looking unwell, somehow connected with those roses. Now I'm sitting on that couch, and Janette's lying on her side with her head resting against my thigh, my hand in her hair. We're talking about a particular time in the past when things had been better between the three of us. As we talk, I'm thinking about how easily I revert to this version of myself when I'm around them - without thinking, my body language, my speech patterns change automatically. It's like taking off a mask.

POV shifts to show LaCroix. He's at some kind of charity event. At the moment he's talking to a man near a buffet table, a man he knows in some professional capacity, and a moment comes when he has to either eat or make some excuse. Without hesitating, he puts some item of food in his mouth. As a disembodied observer/Nicholas, I'm incredibly jealous of his ability to do that without flinching. It would make my life so much easier if I could pretend to eat - socialization revolves almost entirely around food and drink, so just imagine how much easier it would be to blend in. After a moment, LaCroix makes a displeased face, reaches for a napkin, and removes the thing in his mouth. He makes some comment about the poor quality of the food this year compared to previous years, and the man he's talking to agrees. LaCroix's posing as a gourmet, picky about what he eats - it's his usual trick, insulting the food wherever he goes. They make a joke about not being able to trust the food in a place that has such skinny staff, and then the man LaCroix's talking to complains that this event has gone downhill in general - disappointing for such a worthy charity. LaCroix makes a comment about the decline of morality as time goes by. He manages to say this with a straight face.