Recent DJ Posts

Preface:
Bed at 10pm in attempt to catch up on much needed sleep. I also took echinacea drops in a few ounces of water.
I did not end up sleeping, because I could not get comfortable.
I was still sensitive to noise (???) I even put in ear plugs but I kept waking up.
My body was aching because of working out and practice. I began to develop a slight headache.
At around 1am, I decided to take something for the headache and went back to sleep.
Decided to sleep at the foot of my bed after many failed attempts at sleeping or resting.
I was finally able to fall asleep during the early morning hours before my alarm at 6:45am.
Recall is not good; I was so tired and I didn't jot anything down.

DR 1
I had been kidnapped by a man. I remember sitting on the floor in a cell (?), but it was rather large. The room was white, the floors were white/grey. I couldn't really see the bars around me when I was inside. I could only see them as a third person. I was scantily clad. The man would tell me to do things- like "bring a dish(?) or plate(?) here" and "there". And "go sit on the floor". I was not the only slave. There were others. We were not "frightened", but more "broken". I felt like my spirit had been broken.


Side Notes:
This is the 2nd dream this week with a kidnapping.
I felt very submissive in this dream. I don't generally feel like a slave IRL, but I suppose it mean being a slave to many responsibilities and still trying to do what I want to do.
The colors white, and grey

I am in a large building, a mall. It seems to have two primary sections that consists of a tower like structure including a parking cellar. Between the two tower sections is an elongated section of one or two stories, there are cafés and similar non-hard-goods shops. It is dark, there are a lot of people around that I know. We are there for the bar environment – it is as if it has a clubbing space inside one of the towers towards the ground floor. I am slightly on edge, flaky and restless – though not in a debilitating or severe way. The affective state I think is a result of me being confused about the interior of the building I am having a hard time finding my way about.

In the clubbing area there is a mixture of objects, some that seem to create a square or night-time-economy like feel, like outdoor lamps, signs tables and chairs. But there are also couches and fabric based furniture. There is a dim, but warm light surrounding the place, though the outside bar I am headed towards seem to be illuminated more intensely than the rest of the place. Kaiser is at the bar, I think he is waiting for his father to arrive. I go to sit down.

There are a few instances that occur, though I know not the temporal order.

The first is a reminder that I will have to get out cash, specifically pounds, as it will be easier to pay in the bars and shops if I have maybe 20-30 quid.

I am walking about in the overall mall structure – aware of the two towers layout – but I am confused as to where to go. I seem to find a lot of hallways meant to be behind the shop facades.

I am on the top of one of the towers. The light is grey, dusk. I am on a circular parking lot. There is a huge swing door providing entry to the mall, though it also seems like it is for the cars parked there.

I am walking around the circular lot. There are a lot of ethnic minorities – young people – walking about. They are wearing loose clothing, sweat pants and hoodies and generally seem to come across like gang related individuals. I feel anxious, on edge – constantly monitoring my surroundings to check if they will be attacking or approaching me – paranoid. I keep walking around and I start seeing people looking at me. In particular I remember two people wlking from the peripheral ring towards the centre of the tower, they glance at me and they seem intent on me as well.

Then a car come driving in – it is a light blue, almost turqoise or maybe that is the colour of the parked car, maybe both of them are this colour – and it rams into the side of a parked car. From my perspective there is no doubt it is deliberate. The driver gets out and approach the parked car's owner. I don't see a lot more. I turn around, anxious to get away, I start making my way around the lot towards the swing door entry. As I am making my way around I notice some obstructive structures, like spokes between the centre and the peripheral. As I am walking I notice that by now all the people are looking at me and walking towards me at a slow, but steady pace. And so I speed up and make my way inside.
….

When inside the dream shift theme. I am now in a dorm, a row of beds standing on both sides of the room. It is rather bright and everything in the room is pretty much white. I get the sense I am on like the top floor of the building. In the other beds there are people I know, from my high-school class in particular, but maybe also others from primary school.

Looking up to my left towards the door of the room I see Kirsten Busk enter the room. She looks about smiling asking what we are doing, and I sense she is keen to get moving.

“We are tensing off” – as you would following a yoga session, I say. A woman, next to Anne, turns her head and nods to me and indicate that it was a clever remark.

I am lying next to Anne Tøtrup. She is trying to kiss me, yet I miss the cue and when I try to revive it she is non-compliant. It is a playful encounter, mirroring the general atmosphere and my affective state. Young, free and uncaring – and a tad rebellious against the teachers who are there to make sure we have a safe field trip.

…

There is a skip and in the next room there is a similar set-up to the one just described. Except there is less white, more oakish dark colours as well as light tree. I enter the room and head towards the end of it where the beds are no longer separate but conjoined, which gives them a longer resting area to lie on. On the bed there is a light blue and white striped mattress running the entire length of the bed.
There is a guy with me – he seems dependent on me, or following me to some extent – and I say: “Well we might as well head towards the back, it seemed to work well the last time” in reference to the previously described aspect of the dream. And so I start working my way back.

On the way there I stop up and I see Esther van Santen get in one of the beds. I stop to think to myself “That is Esther” and at the edge of my consciousness I am ware that she is dead.
…

There is a brief session of running parcour, or more specifically I am looking for ways to do it – thinking I am awake. In the end I am at a rectangular exit/window at one of the towers, there is no door or glass in it. I close my eyes and expect to start soaring, feeling anxious.

Recent dreams included an appearance from Inanna and Dumuzi.

Today's:

Avoiding direct sunlight, I made my way into a bar where I'm surprised to find a certain man - I'll refer to him as my friend. That's a lie, but it entertains me and disturbs him when I adopt a friendly attitude. I sit down and address him by name, and say, "I thought you were going back to Australia."

"This is Australia," he says.

That explains a lot. My aim is terrible, but at least I've got him to serve as a guide now. But to my surprise, he's not at all impressed by seeing me here. I'd really expected more of a reaction. We talk at cross purposes for a while, until he says that he'd thought I'd disappeared with yadda yadda event - I realize he believes he's talking with the hallucinatory version of me who'd been with him for a while. I'm surprised that lasted so long, it wasn't intended to. I explain to my friend that I'm not his hallucination, I'm the real thing. He doesn't seem to believe me.

I sit down at the bar and wait for him to come around, and watch the sun go down through the window. A woman comes over and sits down next to me - on the bar itself, not a stool. We explain pleasantries, and she says a few things that don't make much sense to me until I recognize this as the opening moves of a mating ritual. I start to tell her that I appreciate the intention but our species aren't compatible in that way - and now my friend's hurrying me out the door. Oh good, it seems he's accepted that other people can see me.

In the parking lot outside the bar, I stop and stare at the stars. I'm absolutely in awe of them. I call my friend by name, and ask him, "What am I looking at?" Seeing them in this unfamiliar arrangement is astonishing. He doesn't seem impressed by them, and I can't figure out why - this arrangement must be the one he grew up with, the one he spent so much time trying to get back to, so he should appreciate it. Seeing them through an atmosphere creates such an amazing effect. There are a few wisps of cloud adding to the view - and for a moment a patch of stars appears to be moving, but then I realize there's a children's toy floating above our heads in the shape of a translucent butterfly, distorting the view. I look down at the kids - they're looking at the toy, not the stars. My friend is trying to hurry me along through the parking lot, and I try to impress upon him how moving this is. "Do you know how long it's been since I've been down to earth? Any earth?" He remembers, he was there, and he is not interested in reminiscing.

Short note from an earlier dream today: reading a description of "laurel leaves, called apollon," in which the author acknowledges that they cause strife but states that it's merely like the rebelliousness of an adolescent, and that they are indisputably sacred to Apollo.

I'm a guy sitting at the counter in a bar. I'm here a lot, I live nearby, maybe in the same building. I'm talking with a younger woman who's sitting to my right - brown ponytail, in her 20s maybe, someone I rely on. I say to her, "You weren't there (meaning Hell), but you know I was there. That's comforting to someone who (don't remember the exact wording for this next bit, but it amounts to trying to stay out of the nuthouse. Implication being that otherwise he'd start doubting his sanity, think his past was a delusion.)" She cuts me off by kissing me. It's a first, it takes me completely off guard.

Over her shoulder, I see my wife (widow, rather - his wife from before he'd died) sitting a few stools down with her boyfriend or fiance or whatever he is. She doesn't know me - or rather, she 'knows' me, casually, as the false identity I've been using since I came back from Hell; she doesn't realize who I was before I died, to most people I look like a completely different person. But even without knowing me, she's looking at us now and looking disgusted. She and the guy she's with get up and leave.

whiterains dream

finally getting more lucid on attempt nights! back in the usual holiday/festival/waterpark/college/school dream again. all sorts of random things going on like people doing weird greek statue type poses with some type of weapon. seemed like a bit of a joke to me. most of the rest of it just round bars doind the usual. lots of old mates involved, mostly CH JC JG UO and remember talking to others really clearly but cant recall who now. was in a uni type park that i first got lucid. saw a massive fake amanita and recalled a previous dream where it felt like i had seen a real one near there before. as i set off on my search it occured that because i was looking for an old dream, i was dreaming. luckily for only the second time i quickly remembered to head for chicken pizza.

while searching in the undergrowth for the mushroom i had become somewhat contained in this service pipe/tunnel type thing. the roof was open but the walls were high so i decided to run along the pipe to try to launch myself off the end to fly to the pyramid. of course now i know i should have just flown without needing the run up. as i climbed onto the pipe i slipped. sometimes this would have caused problems but i managed to just deny that it was slippery which worked well for once. i ran along it at quite a speed then jumped at the end and started flying. it seemed i was already in some kind of temple type thing so didnt have much luck getting to the outside of the pyramid. pretty soon aftrer take off i switched to 3rd person perspective anyway which made the dream fade and move on.

later on i am just in some bar again. these people sat along the wall seem to not be able to see me. i wave at one of them then wave my hands in his face and he does see me. i say sorry about that i just had to check something. he seems fine about it. then i say sometimes its just hard to tell if someone can see you in a dream or not. he looked at me starteld and said 'in a dream?' or something. then he got all panicky so i just said yeah dont worry its just a dream, just a normal dream and just tried to calm him down. he seemed to snap out of it, probably cos his mates started to take the piss or something but its hazy from here

parts of the unlucid bit really felt like i had just had a cracking night out with old mates. also have very hazy memories of it, but i have definately been talking to loads of randoms in weird interesting locations that i dont recall from previous dreams. in an earlier part i remember having a laugh by holding this girl and swinging/sliding down the staircase of some big shopping centre. i kind of knew it was a dream but also felt like my arm would snap if i went too fast. also have a fragment where i got minorly lucid and jumped off a high platform in a work location for a quick fly around. damn it was probably a good few hours long if i could manage to string along all the parts somehow...