lucid

Sometimes in the morning I just lay there and have fragmented sleep. It occurred to me this morning that it was a perfect time to try to lucid, so I did.

I had a dream where I was with my mom and we were in some extraordinarily beautiful vacation spot. The water was crystal clear, everything was warm but not hot, the sun was shining and everything was just breathtaking. She got on a floaty and I had a ton of trouble getting back on the boat. The dream was very short.

When I woke up, I decided to MILD. I thought of being back there, and then how I'd get back on the boat and go inside the cabin to summon a girl I've been trying to have lucid sex with for weeks.

When I fell asleep, I was in a very large office sort of place, but that doesn't really describe it. I can see it clearly but it defies description, although it wasn't very spectacular. I got the sense that I was still awake even though it was a dream, and I was a middle aged woman with my friend. There was a portal in front of me that led to the dream world. I said to her "Wake me up if I don't remember I'm dreaming" and leaped in.

There were sex booths that people could go into and have sex with anyone they desired that I had created. I sort of stumbled around and then she came in and touched me and I realized I was dreaming.

The lucid was very weak. I knew I was dreaming and had total control of my dream, yet I didn't have control of myself. I made a row of the booths with my mind and realized I was losing it. I tried rubbing my hands and said "I want to see my dream guide to help me LOSE lucidity" even though I wanted him to help me stay lucid. I turned around and a very muscular man with blonde chest hair was there. I fell down and woke up.

When I woke up, I kept completely still and kept my eyes closed. I saw the most brilliant HI, with these wonderful flashes of color and images, and then I felt as if my soul was trying to rip out of my body while it was being compressed. I didn't QUITE complete the DEILD, but I got close, and so I'm pretty proud of myself.

August 9th, 2011

First lucid in a few days! I just woke up from it and I'm going to try to go back to bed in a minute as I just came off a REM cycle. I went to bed confident after listening to this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ra1iWqQBcp4

As soon as I started dreaming, a dream character, I think a friend of mine in a black leather jacket said "I've got a present. You're dreaming." I looked at my hand and had six fingers, and tried to focus on the details of the world around me to clarify and stabilize, but my vision was a little messed up. Everything got really blurry as I said thank you to him, and he was smiling, and then I was in my room.

I decided to try to spin, and sluggishly turned in bed. I then fell flat on my face. I decided to simply go downstairs, but my mother's snoring as obnoxious. Remembering a thread I'd seen, I said loudly "Silencio!" and thrust my hand at the door. No success. I tried again, and then a third time, but the third time I just willed it to happen. This was MY dream, and she WAS going to shut up. She did.

As I went downstairs, I heard a terrible, terrible shriek. I changed my plans on the spot because, honestly, it sounded like a woman being raped, and I couldn't do anything while that was happening. I ran outside and it was night. There were two little foxes being chased by two shadow creatures. The fox-creatures were screaming. I started throwing fireballs at them by screaming "Exterminado!" and had a 50/50 success rate. When they were all dead, I was teleported away to a kitchen where Oprah and a bunch of other women were staying.

Recall is a bit hazy here, but I remember legitimately making penis jokes. Something about my having pig-like genitalia. That sounds pretty disgusting in real life, but in my dream it was hilarious and they all laughed.

In my dream, I felt and saw my leg move and then was awake, open-eyed, staring at my leg.

In the dream I had after writing this post, I was at my home and the town festival was happening. I don't remember much of that. I was back at my apartment and I was trying to leave. The Weasley twins, who were decked out in body mod and other punk-esque wear, needed to retrieve something. Just before my mom and aunt (recurring dream character now) were trying to drive out when two men accosted the vehicle. It was explained to me that they had been harassing my family, so I got out of the car and went over to them with my cousin.

When the Weasleys went to get whatever it was they needed, I stood on the corner yelling at the two guys who'd run up to the car. Over the course of time, eight more people showed up on their side and were becoming increasingly violent. There was a man standing under a streetlight who I assumed was a bouncer. I tried to get his attention.

"Excuse me! Green hat man!" I shouted, but it took a few tries for him to look my way. I said "Can you do something about this? Call the police or something?"

He refused to see the violent situation unfolding and ignored me.

All the sudden, we all started fighting. I wasn't a godlike master of the fisticuffs, but they were extremely terrible and sloppy, so my cousin and I beat them all. The Weasleys came back, and Fred was smoking, but they didn't have anything new. I wondered why they had left in the first place. Four against ten is still unlikely, but I think if we had the goddamn Weasleys with us, we probably would have cleaned up even faster.

I went inside my apartment, very angry. My mother said something to me that was extremely irritating, and I picked up the dish drainer and threw it at her head. She dodged it but it cut the edge of her neck. She came at me with a little peeling knife and started trying to cut me, screaming at me to never cut her again. Then I woke up.

August 3rd, 2011

Awoke in beige room. My skin was on fire, so I said out loud, "I want my skin to stop burning!" and it mostly stopped but still smoldered a bit. I rubbed my face to help me ground myself when I felt a slip. I opened a door into a hallway. There was nothing in there, but I walked through and tried to find things. The walls started bending so I rubbed my face to bring me back.
I wanted to fight something, so I turned a corner and said "Big scary demon!" but nothing came out. A few seconds later I heard some noises and footsteps, and a monster came out. It was a large monster that was also skin colored. I fought it by tearing the pipe from behind a door and fighting him with it. Everything was moving sluggishly, but I was able to will everything to move a bit faster.
Other monsters appeared behind me as I was fighting it, a Black Widow spider with the upper torso of a woman. I was knocked back and a message popped up that said "You are wasting your precious little time!"
Next thing I knew I was in an operating room, but it was barren except for the operating table. There were doctors surrounding the table, all bent over and faceless. This is when I started to lose control. I wanted to try more control and possibly dream sex, so I first thought Maddison, and then switched to Jacob. In the upper right corner of my vision at all times were symbols implying surgical tools I could use, like a video game, although I had no interest in cutting anyone open.
The nondescript humanoid that appeared before me was the size of a very small action figure, big enough to fit into my hand. I completely lost the dream and said "You're going to die by my tits..." and then woke up.
Before this, although my sense of time makes it seem after or even during, I was in a room with a bunch of older girls after exploring a beach-front house a bit. In the dream, I was trying to sleep (much like real life) and everyone was bothering me (much like real life). Justin came over and sat on a couch I was trying to sleep on, so I got up and left. I walked into a room with a TV and something else on a desk, tripped and fell, and narrowly avoided it crushing me even though I got the sense that it was weightless. I went into another room and saw Tatiana sleeping on an oddly placed cot between a coffee table, couch and chair. I had said to Justin previously "This is Tatiana's mom's house, you know," and for some reason he found that amusing. I wondered where Kevin was. After this, I went back to lay down and Justin was gone. Where he'd been I smelled fart, quite strongly. I pulled the sleeping bag I was using in both real life and the dream over me when a bunch of older girls came in the room.
They were all friends, even though most of them never spoke and I can't even remember their faces. Sable was telling them all a story when Katy came over and pushed me, but she was very strong, even though she was being playful. I got up, not caring about my previous insecurity, and as soon as I walked through a door got a blue Sims-like pop up message that said utter nonsense. There weren't even any whole words. I then became lucid.