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Trying to improve my dream recall.

Going to put down in my dream journal no recall if I don't remember. I read somewhere that doing this for two weeks should help improve my recall.

Was going to do write that but then I remembered a couple of things.

My cat was with another cat and swatted at it.

Also I was working in Adobe Illustrator and deleted a path in the dream. I felt like I got rid of something about myself. Don't remember what but I feel better...

Quite the long dream!

So, at first, there was some sort of bombing or tsunami or whatever (probably because I’m reading a book with a plot like that). I was with some friends and I knew right away that we should gather as many supplies as possible.

I convinced my friends that we should go to the supermarket and they started buying things. There were two girls with us that I work with, they’re very fake and selfish, so I knew I’d have to lose them somehow.

When the time came to get into the car, I left one of them in the supermarket, but the other one followed me. So I simply stared at her and shouted “YOU ARE NOT GOING WITH US”.

Then I got in the car, which didn’t exist, I was literally sitting on the floor and gliding around.

I got to my friend’s house and it finally dawned on me that I hadn’t called my parents. I called my mother and, from the sound of it, she was part of a guerrilla to survive. I was mildly disappointed that I wasn’t there.

At my friend’s house, I met my cousin and he was also wondering what we should do. He told me I should decide since I’m always reading apocalyptic stories.

My car was outside, and I kept looking at it since my keys from my keyboard kept getting stolen.

We finally went to another house and the door was open. I tried to shut it, but I was too late. We were attacked by a giant, slightly supernatural spider. I’m not sure why, I’m not afraid of spiders. It looked like Aragog.

I tried to throw an explosive at it, but I woke up before I saw what happened.

I had several times during the night where I thought I was writing down a dream. The only reason I know it was a dream is because there isn't a new dream log on my computer. The other scrap I had involved the color green. There was a green pillar I think.

I arose from my body into my bedroom as usually. Also it was dark as usually, when I travel at night. I started to walk around my house, finding nobody, not in beds, nor elsewhere. I wished for light, the darkness felt depressive. I failed to lit my aura, but I managed to see things... to see things, as if they were light sources themselves.
I went outside since there was nothing interesting inside of the house. My village was empty. I felt to be weary somehow. The only thing, that occurred to me, was to fly around... and after a short while I took course to my friend. I doubted, that I will find her when there was nobody in my village. As usually, I got lost halfway to her home... but this was at least interesting- I got lost by following the road, which unexpectedly changed into country road and ended on very high, step and rocky hill. From the upper side I saw both my village and friends village. There was no road down from that hill... strange- how was I following road when there is none now? It shouldn't vanish... I explored a top of that hill. I found there a love pair, a young girl and boy... Of course, they were disinterested in the communication.
I looked down to rocky abyss and I saw something like a shady blots moving up the steep rocky hill side. I turned and told to lovers: "mountain goats are coming this way". They looked in disbelief to me and immediately continued to kiss deeply each other. After a short while, a lineup of animals come directly to me, lead by big mountain goat... Except it wasn't normal mountain goat... it had antlers like moufflon. It came close to me and I sunk to my knees for some unknown reason... and I looked directly into its eyes. Those eyes looked back, and I saw an intelligence in them, something like old wisdom. Something like freedom, and peace. Something like I was assessed by it.
There was sinking feeling in my head and I found myself in a room filled with soft grayish light. There was young black haired boy i one corner of the room. He looked like he is working... but I could say that only by feeling, because the room was completely empty. The whole feeling was as if he is somebody important, wise and powerful.
I told him: " I got lost while walking through astral, could you send me to my friend, please?"
And he answered something like: "I can't do that, you are on too high level of astral comparing to her level and I can't change astral levels for you. You need to learn." And I was back inside of my body.

So I've been looking to lucid dream these past couple of weeks since my first one in years three weeks ago.

I've been dream journaling everyday. Reality checking all through the day. Watching movies on lucid dreaming. And reading books on it. So I can carry the Am I dreaming now feeling into the dreams. Well, it worked.

I'm having a shower with a gorgeous girl and her much younger sister. And there's a voice on loudspeakers asking us to shower together, and I take that to mean that we should move closer. We're all already naked. It's pretty platonic (we've been in the shower for the last 8 hours I realise), and I just think I'm going to be 'decent' and not a perv. But they come back with towels wrapped around them. But instead of a shower, I realise we're at a meditation retreat and we start meditating in a grassy meadow. I know I wanted to do a meditation retreat, but didn't know I'd already signed up for it. Someone says I didn't know we'd end up in Louisville (and I realise there's no way I'd end up there and realise it's a dream). I make a joke about, we're not in Kansas anymore. And i begin to drop out of the dream, and it turns wispy and abstract and I think that maybe I had a coffee in real life and thats why I'm having these semi dreams. I feel like I'm just on the fringes of the dream.

Another dream where I'm with my medschool buddies, and think to myself in the dream that I'm tired as I've been up at night trying to lucid dream. And then realise I Am in a dream. But again, it's on the fringes of the dream once I realise it. But once I do realise it, I keep talking to whoever I'm talking to. Not making any sudden moves, and just watching it play out.

In another dream, the same super gorge girl from before comes up to me and gives me a drink with a piece of warm cinnamon cheese (?!!) she's put into it. I realise we're in a dream and think I say it to here. But once I realise I get back on the fringes of the dream again.

In another dream, I'm with Jeffrin, my best bud from 30 years. And I realise it's a dream, and I'm on the fringes of the dream again. We're inside a room and chatting and I think hey, lets just be a dick to him in the dream. So I say, Jeff, you're a real asshole, huh? He doesn't bat an eyelid and comes back to me with 'How's your music practice going?. And I say whoa, you know my weak spots. He says yeah, there's around a half dozen, there's more, but I'm not fussed about them. That teaches me to behave. And I go back to doing what I'm doing on the fringes of the dream environment. And then Suddenly the room becomes fully solid. I walk looking around. Dont make the mistake of telling Jeff this is a dream. And go out on the balcony, and don't want to see or do too much as it would get me out of the dream. I'm thinking I don't want to be cooped inside the house in a dream and want to go out, but again, don't want to make any sudden moves as I want to keep the dream going. Then the super gorge girl comes into the room, and begins to put her trainers on as if to go out. I can't believe my eyes, this is a dream come true within a dream. I get to go out, and I'm going to get jiggy with this super gorge girl (who's been following me around in my dreams and seems pretty into me). But get too excited and the dream drops away.

So whilst not much happened, it's teaching me about getting the hang of lucid dreaming. Once I realise I'm lucid, the dream drops from solidity to a blurry image, and instead of giving up the ghost with that particular dream, I should just stick on, not make any sudden moves or say anything out of the ordinary, and wait for it to turn solid.

Which was something else. In one second I'm sleeping in my bed, and seeing this dream vision in front of me. And the next, I'm in a completely solid room I can walk around in, look out of the balcony overlooking the city night lights and interact with people I've seen in various other dreams.

Spontaneous lucid dream. First one in years (had two others people where I just flew around).

When I'm in my dreams, I completely surprise the people around me by being able to levitate, and glide along the ground. Sometimes raise my body up to 10-20 feet as I almost fly. Angling my body around to change direction, and being able to increase speed by leaning forwards and decrease speed, or come to a stall by leaning backwards.

I've often told myself that I can only do this in dreams, and if I find myself doing it in one of my dreams to realise that it is a dream.

Well, that happened.

I'm flying around in my old medschool campus, and realise hey, I'm flying, this must be a dream. I keep flying, gliding around and come to rest in a garden where people are listening to a talk.

I see a beautiful lady being pestered by this guy who's hitting on her. I know now I've seen her in other dreams. I go up to her and kiss her, and she smiles and I lift her up off her seat, carry her a couple of steps and walk with her. She's happy I've saved her from the sex pest.

I'm walking with her, and tell her this is a dream and I'm completely lucid. I know that she's a theta healer, I've seen her in other dreams, and can also recall that there was a time she slept with someone else at another conference.

She think's it's cool, and helps me down a staircase and lets me into a room where I meet a group of my old friends.

Everything seems absolutely real. Solid, obeying laws of physics. I tell him I've realised I'm in the middle of a dream, and so are they. And they don't believe me. I say, I can prove it. And they don't believe I can. One of them says Hey Ryan wants to prove to us that this is a dream, and asks a couple of guys chatting to be silent.

I say, 'Okay. Count your fingers!'. (you can't count your fingers, and or use light switches in dreams).

And they absolutely shit when they find out. Lots of shouts of whoa! WTF! as they all realise that it really is a dream. I pick something up, a tiny bottle filled with a yellow liquid and I say okay, lets test things out a bit and think about throwing it on the floor. I wonder about pieces of glass, and spilt liquid, that other people have to avoid after I do this. And just as I start to hesitate.... that's when the dream completely dissolves and I'm awake again.

Maybe my mind just couldn't handle keeping so many lucid consciousnesses alive in the dream. Heck, it's a surprise I was able to keep the lucidity going for as long as I did.

The last lucid dream I had was around 5 years ago, when I counted my fingers, realised I was dreaming and instantly took a couple of steps, took a jump and started flying.

I think now this realise I'm dreaming when I'm flying thought has been firmly embedded, I might just have a lot more lucid dreams. Unless that thought makes me stop flying now. But I don't think so. I fly pretty often in my dreams, and in an earlier dream tonight I realised I spooked an elephant when I was flying, and it started to attack me, and I had to drop down to the ground and dodge it standing on the other side of a pillar and.. okay, that's another dream and another story.

2017, 09-26

Game of Dreams – The Mystery Gunslinger

I am outside at night in a place I don’t recognize. The moon is covering the area in a silvery light. I look around and I see wide spaced trees and grass and a few rocks, but nothing particularly interesting. There is a town not far away that looks like something out of an RPG. I wonder where I am and what I am here to do. Then I see movement, someone is approaching the town. A lot of people are trying to stealthily approach the town, though not trying too hard because the moonlight gives them away. The people approaching are a bunch of armed warriors and I know they are there to cause death and destruction. They are all riding horses, but not moving very quickly. I morph my right arm into an Alex Mercer blade and move towards the approaching warriors.

When I get close enough for the warriors to see me one of them comes forward, probably their leader. He asks what a lone little girl is doing out here by herself? I say I am here to make sure he and his friends don’t cause any trouble. He asks what if they do? There’s nothing a little girl like me can do to stop them. Since they haven’t seen my Alex Mercer blade yet I hold it out to make sure they do. The man who has been talking to me does a double take and then says I’m not a little girl after all, I’m a little freak… a little abomination… and I will be the first one to die tonight. I ready my blade and tell the man that anyone among them who dares should go ahead and bring it, they’ll soon regret it.

The man who has been speaking to me says he can take care of this alone. He gets off his horse and walks over towards me with his sword ready. He makes a couple attempts to strike me and I block both. He attacks more seriously, but I block those attacks as well. Some of the other thugs are starting to mock him now. He pauses and glares at me, so I say it’s my turn now. I attack him with my blade arm and he blocks with his sword, but this time my blade arm cuts right through it. The man is stunned long enough for my blade to remove his head. The others stare as the man’s body collapses. One of them says I am a monster and must die! They close in around me, one of them says no one does that to a Lannister and gets away with it. So they are Lannisters… that means I am in a Game of Thrones dream.

I really don’t want to hurt any horses here, so I start by sending a telepathic message to each of the horses to buck off their riders. The horses respond and many of the riders fall of because they were unprepared, the rest end up getting off because their horses are impossible to handle or direct. The horses all take off. I say now that the innocents are out of the way I can take care of all those pathetic cowards who were trying to attack a civilian town. Even after what they saw happen to the first man the others are figuring I haven’t got a chance against all of them. I start proving them wrong. I cut down the first couple that come carelessly at me and the others stay back a bit longer, maybe trying to formulate a plan. I don’t think they’re capable of too much of a plan and I attack, cutting another one down.

As this is going on I hear a voice calling, “Save some for me!” That makes me and all of the thugs look over to see a man approaching. One of them asks who the fuck he is, but I know. It’s MoSh! I wonder what he is doing in a Game of Thrones dream, but he doesn’t pause. He pulls out a pair of guns and starts shooting. His shots are perfectly aimed, taking down one of the thugs with each shot targeted directly between their eyes. It seems my arm blade is no longer the most impressive thing here to them, now they are talking about the man who wields thunder in his hands and passes out death with it. One of the enemies near me mutters, “What is he? A wizard?” I say no, he’s a gunslinger, before relieving him of his head. Some of the thugs are running into the town and MoSh follows them. A man is trying to use a crying woman as a shield and I hear MoSh tell him he has forgotten the face of his father before blasting the confused look off of his face, leaving the woman untouched.

I get back to work, as there are far more enemies still around. I cut more of them down as they seem more disorganized than ever, not sure where to go or what to attack. As I am fighting I hear numerous more gunshots sound out and I know MoSh is taking out more enemies since there are no guns here. After a while MoSh and I are standing alone amidst the bodies of fallen enemies, all that remained alive have fled. MoSh comes over to me and holsters his guns, which are clearly genuine gunslinger weapons from Roland Deschain’s world, very fine and powerful weapons. MoSh looks around and then at me. He asks where Roland is. I can’t help but chuckle as I tell him Roland is in a different dream… this is the Game of Thrones world! Everything fades and I wake up.

Morning of September 26, 2017. Tuesday.



Dream Series: The Experience of Prescience, the Inexplicable Dream State Phenomenon. Part 1

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My wife Zsuzsanna and our children (mostly as we appear now in reality) are living in a house that is similar to our present home (and implied to be our present home), though it has a fictional second storey.

Over time, I become aware that the sun is too hot. I mostly become aware of this upon going to the second floor with Zsuzsanna, which is mostly featureless and resembles the second floor of the Loomis Street house when the apartment was empty, as there is a singular window on one side of the large room and a ceiling sloped on both sides. (I have not been in this house in real life since 1994.) I feel intense heat and so I realize that we need to go back downstairs. I assume that the world is ending, but I do not feel very emotional about it. I tell our youngest son that the world will be burned up soon. Still, I want all of our family together for “the end”.

In the last segment of my dream, we all go into our oldest son’s room. Zsuzsanna and most of our children are present in the room. Our oldest son is seemingly not present at this time and I become concerned about his well-being. Eventually, Zsuzsanna and our youngest son slide out a cardboard storage box from under our oldest son’s bed (in the same location as it is in reality). (The large cardboard box has similar colors and sparse imagery as that otherwise found on a pizza box.) Our oldest son is sleeping in it. I am relieved, though I still have concern about his health and hope he will wake soon.

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Friday, 30 March 2018: What I presently understand about this dream, based on the following real-life event: From exactly one week after this dream, in real life, our oldest son had to spend four days in the hospital from severe food poisoning where I then held the same mood that my dream self had.

Despite The Sleeper factor (as well as the rendering of the bed) otherwise being a common dream state indicator since early childhood, signifying the subliminal recognition of being asleep, it was specifically linked to very detailed prescience in this case. Our oldest son being in a cardboard storage box under his bed seems to be a subliminal association with both a pizza box and a coffin, and as such, could have been a very specific warning had I paid more attention.

Additionally, on November 7, our oldest son’s room is where my family gathered for protection from the storm, though this proved to be futile, as the roof had been torn off and rain poured through the ceiling, though of course it was not the literal end of the world.

Dreams in which there is “something wrong with the sun” have been very common since early childhood. The usual cause of this is based on the conscious self identity not being viable within the dream state, as the sun symbolizes the conscious self identity in the context of clarity of awareness and with viable thinking skills (which do not otherwise exist in the dream state). Some people might catch the play on “something wrong with the sun” regarding our son, as he did have a fever in his severe illness. This specific association could be coincidence, but since the validated-as-premonitory thread “something wrong with my son” could very well be the autosymbolic trigger in this case, it might not be coincidental.

It may also be relevant that the Loomis Street second-floor window is to the east in reality, and this is where our oldest son sleeps in orientation to where Zsuzsanna and I sleep, as a window has been validated long ago to signify unconscious communication with someone else in some cases.

The fictional second floor implied to be of our present home is possibly a transpersonal factor (interconsciousness) related to a certain band of liminal space (though is otherwise only an emergent consciousness factor). Dreams that are dominantly prescient also typically lack the usual RAS mediation found in other dream types.

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Lately, my dreams have been less and less vivid and I don't know why.

Fragment 1: I was watching a TV documentary where there was a rock band that consisted only of hippies. The drummer/leader of the band said that "We are willing to indulge ourselves in this absent minded spanish music"

Fragment 2: I was in my art classroom watching the nightmare before christmas with V. When the opening was about to happen, V said "this is the best part" and then the narrator who would normally be telling us about halloween land or whatever was instead singing something to the tune of hotel california but one octve down. I then woke up.

D1 - In a school building, planning a lesson, I am suited and there is a headteacher observing me and we have some discussion.

D2 - I am trudging through snow. I feel the wetness and cold, and see the lumpy footprints i am leaving behind as I make my way uphill.


Notes :
My dream usually have about five common people in them. So I decided I would use them, obviously as dream signs. But when I set that as my intention last night, it meant they did not appear in any dreams whatsoever.
This happens regularly, I choose a dream sign, so my subconscious filters it out of my dreams. How I can use this to my advantage?

Meditation + WBTB procured me two lucid dreams. Throughout one lucid dream I was rubbing my hands to stabilize. It worked to some extent. When I walked outside my house, everything was overcast like it was a rainy, depressed 7AM in Texas. It felt quite cold as well. Tried to change the sky, but things just got darker. When into some houses; I was looking for someone.

Onward and upward.

Morning of September 25, 2017. Monday.



In my dream, I find myself with a personified version of the preconscious that I created in the 1980s. Although this form is active every now and then, like most forms of the preconscious, there is typically no connection to waking life or the pretense of “interpretation”.

This male in my dream as the role of the RAS (reticular activating system), which is what biologically controls the waking transition and its symbolism between consciousness and unconsciousness, is of the “Hierarchy”, a term I created in the 1980s for the nature of the dream state and its various core components and real-time symbolism including circadian rhythms symbolism. Its inherent waking symbolism is of a necessarily biological authority, unrelated to waking life. (Dream symbolism is more about the nature of being unconscious than being awake, kind of a no-brainer really, yet most of society presently completely ignores this truth.)

Alex (Alexander; chosen because it means “defender of men” or “protector of mankind”, a good analogy for RAS) and I are in an unknown building. It may be a library, as shelves and dividing walls that do not reach the ceiling are present. There is an unfamiliar elderly woman present. Though I am never lucid (or even subliminally lucid), we are here to research the nature of the Hierarchy, and the woman mentions some sort of ancient document, which supposedly relates to this organization that secretly rules and protects mankind.

At one point, Alex and the woman are on the other side of a shelf that is almost up to the ceiling. I can hear him confirm that the document is genuine. Wondering what my role in all this is, I decide to climb up to the top of the shelf.

I look through a few boxes on the top shelf. I look down and see an unusual anthropomorphic crescent moon cookie cutter, though it is vertically oriented rather than of a logical cookie cutter design. It has the essence of an ancient artifact and I find it interesting. I ask Alex if I can have this and use it in my work.

He informally tells me that there are “no cookie cutters” in the Hierarchy, more so referring to the prospective role of being a cookie cutter in the Hierarchy.

Later, I am with my older brother Dennis (who still lives in America and last seen in real life in 1994). I tell him about the Hierarchy and about Alex. I say that Alex has “limitless diamonds” and owns whatever he wants.

The moon represents the circadian rhythms factor of dreaming (as night is typically associated with the dream self while daylight and the sun represent the dynamics of conscious self identity). Its being a cookie cutter signifies the nature of lucid dreaming under conscious self identity creation. The fact that there are apparently “no cookie cutters” in the Hierarchy translates as RAS being of a biological factor and that one should not have full conscious control of circadian rhythms cycles, which could damage the physical body. This does not limit or suspend any potential for apex lucidity of course, which mostly occurs in the morning anyway within my last dream. The cookie cutter’s position on the shelf is more about the dynamic of this part of the sleeping and dreaming cycle, the moon’s crescent form signifying my percentage of unconscious awareness and percentage of vividness of the dream state (for example, a full moon would indicate full awareness while in the dream state). Liminal space dividers in the dream state are symbolized in real time by walls, fences, or high shelves. My act of climbing the shelf is symbolic of my dream self (subliminally) seeking more understanding of RAS and the preconscious.

My comment to Dennis about the diamonds relates that the preconscious and RAS are of the main biological power behind sleeping and waking transitions. Being within a large diamond is one of the Mastership meditations that in part represents clarity of thought even when unconscious (though again, I do not have viable lucidity in this dream).

This dream is mainly the result of a new variant of affirmation-based dream preparation. Instead of using “after” and doing the count after a particular affirmation, I have changed this to “anytime after” for a number of reasons. For example, “anytime after” is far more powerful than “after”, as “after” would otherwise denote “immediately after” or “soon after” while “anytime after” would be far more likely to integrate into the continuity of a later dream, either literally or symbolically depending on the desired outcome.

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D1 - Abstract kind of dream, different persona are fighting (a bit) over whos incharge of me. I see them as floating heads, in groups of 4, sort of in bubbles. The group in charge have a woman head honcho, she is distinctive as her face is white and green due to the lighting and her eyes are blue & green but the colours are split like when people try and get a 3d effect by splitting the colours on the image (to be reassembled via 3d glasses).

D2 - There is an election going on with a load of people gathered in a park. I have had this park before in a dream about a college, in this dream however the white stone building in the centre of the park is a hall for voting.
The campaigning party are represented by a fluorescent light Greek blue colour, which is floating around in the air (kind of).

D3 - Had a rambling dream of travelling somewhere by bike I think.
Then I set off to work early morning, feeling quite pleased with myself that I am organised and will arrive on time before rest of family are even up.
I then look around in the early light and notice that in every direction there are towering plumes of black smoke, on the horizon. I think "oh shit, apocalypse" and hurry back home.

+ football play, I'm playing! [a lot of the time normally I'm just observing the play]. I line up on the right side at the line of scrimmage, looking down the line towards the center and the ball, seeing the heads/hands of the players on both sides. I'm keeping my eyes only on the ball and ignoring the snap count, because I know there are deceptive snap words. In fact I do see false starts/offside movements by both sides a little and wonder if there will be a flag, but no the ball is snapped and I start running. I make my way down the field to the defensive secondary line and there I'm blocked by a big defender and I just can't make my way around him. The ball does not come to me but to a teammate, but he reaches me and I wriggle free to receive a lateral handoff from him. Then I start running [I now realize] the other way back down the field.

+ in the car, a guy is in the back, and my dad, I'm in the front seat (standing), I notice LB is there too, in a revealing peach colored outfit showing a lot of skin including a thong showing off a great asset, and I catch the guy in the back staring at her behind.

+ parking a car in a spot that may be a bit hard to get out of (hard to turn around), there is a parking attendant there. Talking with a woman about how I'm going to get to a certain spot, she's indicating I need to take one mode of transport that I think goes too far in the wrong direction, I explain that I've parked my car in [city Cu].

+ in a bathroom, walking back and forth, I see the toilet seat I want is covered with a seat guard ring made from a washcloth, I think this is a great idea rather than using a disposable toilet seat guard, someone in there asks me why I'm going back and forth all the time

+ [DO] I'm floating along the path of some vehicle with an unobstructed view out the front, it's driving over grass and curbs made from packed gravel, there is a conversation (me talking?) about how there are too many enumerated values for a certain variable in a program, I'm realizing that the uninitialized value can fully take the place of one of the enumerants, and I'm pondering this trying to think if it's really true or not while the vehicle continues on, making left and right turns

The events in my dream are kinda random but remembered a lot.


I'm trying to get into what looks like an elevator.

I'm hanging onto a rocky grassy area underneath something maybe like a bridge trying to get my girlfriend's attention.

There's a crowd of men in suits somewhere.

I ask my teacher if it's too late to turn in my homework and it looks like there's no one in the room we're in.

I see an old friend and I don't like what he says to someone.

I'm in a forest or tree area but I wasn't aware enough to know what I was doing there.