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Morning of December 28, 2017. Thursday.



I stand before a brick wall with variegated brick colors. The glowing word “FLOATING” (in uppercase, with white letters) appears hovering in the air a couple inches in front of the wall at about face level. That is, each letter of the word itself is floating in the air (and has a neon essence) and I consider that is what the meaning of this feature is (as if associated with a “Sesame Street” short). I am non-lucid, so I fail to recognize the usual vestibular system symbolism, which directly symbolizes being in the dream state. The wall symbolizes the division between the non-lucid fictional dream self identity and the conscious self identity in waking life, though also metaphorically serves as the division between lucidity and non-lucidity while in the dream state.

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Fragment
Something about Noah, maybe V and my sister too. Woke up with Raspberry Beret stuck in my head.

This lucid dream is from several days ago.

I was with Manei and Jack in this large mansion. The home had purple wallpaper and dark blue carpet and numerous rooms filled with expensive furniture and fine art. We were walking around looking at the fine art. Jack came across a suit of armor that was on display and started to take it off the stand and put it on. I advised against it saying we didn't know who owned the mansion and they might be upset if we try to took it. He didn't listen to me and put the armor on anyway.

This guy then showed up. He had short brown hair and a green polo shirt on though his appearance was utterly unremarkable, and his face was kind of blurry to where I couldn't make out any distinct features.

The blurry face I believe it was what triggered my lucidity. The guy then started trying to attack us. Jack (who was wearing the armor) ran in with a sword. The green shirt man grabbed his sword by the blade and broke it, before picking jack up by the throat and throwing him into a china cabinet. Manei tried to fight him next, but he grabbed her by the hair and punched her over and over in the stomach. He then turned to me. I was fully lucid at this point. I figured I could just will this character out of existence, but he had a sort of stubbornness to him, and I could not. I moved to fight him and he fought back and grabbed me by the wrist along with several punches to the face and chest.

I was surprised how much it actually hurt and I was bleeding from my mouth. The guy still had a grip on me but I somehow managed to get away. I began flying above the guy and started throwing fireballs at him. It didn't seem to affect him much but he had no answer in terms of fighting back. I continued to lob fireballs on him time and agian. I blasted him through a large oak door into a library like room causing the guy to fall into an orrery-like device with several golden rings and models of planets riding around on rails. Still showing no signs of injury or weakness I continued to throw fireballs at the guy.

There were several dream characters in the library scene who ran out of the room panicking as the fight moved into the room. At one point a stray fireball blew over several bookshelves which fell over like dominoes. I continued to throw fireballs onto this guy with increasing ferocity but was doing no damage, though the attacks continually knocked him back. Eventually I combined my red and blue flames and made a purple energy ball which I threw at him. When it hit him in the chest he exploded leaving only his legs. There were wires and metal parts sticking out where his torso had begun.

I lost the dream and woke up shortly thereafter.

I really don't remember much on how this started but somehow from the sky we were transported to a place of red armor roof tops and grey slated buildings. Upon arriving, we ( a group of people who I do not know) could hear explosions and shooting from pretty much all directions. Then the people that I was around all ran away. I didn't knew where to go or what to do. That's when I heard someone yell something in what I suspect to be in chinese.

That's when you could see a huge bomb land and shook the entire area for a good minute. People kept running and almost bumping in to me. That's when I saw a man in grey trying to shoot people. After killing a few people, he see's me and attempts to take a couple rounds at me. I somehow manage to not get hit but very quickly it partial became clear to me that I wouldn't get hurt. I said it to myself in my head that I am dreaming. Upon realizing this I made an attempt to get shot so that the shock of it will wake me up. I also was curious to know what the dream would make me feel once I did take a bullet.

Before I knew it, I had a false awakening and was lying in my bed with my lucidity gone. When my eyes open this weird looking sharingan was present for about 5 seconds with in my eye sight. I got up from the bed and could see a few people and what look to be my father running. I could tell by the design that we were at the entrance of an airplane. People were rushing through the hall way to get on to it as everyone had this feeling the entire area was going to blow up.

The door's open and was quickly closing itself, leaving anyone who did not get on to it fast enough screwed. I had miss the first one but fortunately got the chance to get on the second one.

Dec 22

I dreamed I was at some sort of beach area (maybe with tide pools?). Just before that, I’d been having some weird bdsm dreams that I ain’t sharing online (basically I was borrowing some kinda book or dvd from the college library and it was full of wild stuff); this one was much more family-friendly.
It started off sunny and warm, and one of the first things that happened was that I found a baby sea turtle. I scooped it out of the water (not really feeling the water but seeing and feeling the turtle very vividly) and excitedly showed it to the rest of my family.
Soon enough it turned that there were loads of types of turtles around, including something called a “castle turtle” that was huge (maybe like three feet across) and had its head coming up through the middle of its shell, perched on a long neck. Its name was basically a reference to its defensive mannerisms and centrally situated head: it peered out over its shell as though looking out over its castle, and was constantly prepared to swim away from danger coming at any angle.
There was also some sort of kitten/turtle hybrid, which, in adult form, didn’t have many kitten characteristics, but which gave birth to straight-up kittens. The kittens couldn’t breathe underwater and had to learn to swim at least a little (they were bad at it no matter what). I was quite worried when I watched from underwater as a kitten, trying to swim, got close to the floor of the shallow water and seemed at risk of getting its flailing front paws tangled in a seaweed plant. Ultimately, I rationalized it as “a way for kitten genes to spread out into the ocean.”
After that, we moved a short distance down the shore, and everything grew much colder. It’s hard to remember, but I think the family was getting in a van when I noticed a huge turtle’s neck sticking out of the water, completely covered in a thick layer of ice.
I got excited and yelled for my family to see this and help me, while I started removing pieces of ice. Soon enough the turtle was free, and retracted its head underwater… only to come back up a moment later. It seemed that it was quite attached to hanging out in that position, even if it meant becoming frozen. Underneath the ice, its coloring had some brilliant oranges and greens (which clashed a bit, but was quite striking all the same).
There were a lot of details in the dream that I left out because they were confusing, vague, or nonsensical compared to the rest of the dream. I hope that by only remembering the clear parts, it’ll help my dreams become more clear and stable as well.

Dec 23
This was about reuniting with a girl from my old youth group (NG) and her developing an eating disorder. I wasn’t hugely on-board with that as a dream topic so I didn’t write it down.

Dec 24
I dreamed I was in the middle of nowhere, at night, in an area where peeps were all about adopting dogs. Not the first time I’ve dreamed about nighttime countryside things so it all felt a little bit familiar.
Somehow I arrived at the house of the Main Family that’d led everyone else in adopting dogs (specifically, the mother of the family was the Dog Adoption Guru of sorts). They had a big golden retriever on their porch (I think?). I wanted to talk to them so I literally just… walked in the front door and then called out to let them know I was in their living room. It felt like the wrong approach even in the dream, but somehow it didn't occur to me to knock on the door... or else it seemed like they weren't home and I decided to straight-up walk in to check.
Surprisingly they didn’t mind the intrusion. The lady and her husband showed up from a back room (the kitchen), like they'd just been hanging out back there, and I’m not sure what we talked about but eventually they tried to sell me some cereal. They had big boxes of cereal arranged along the walls of their dining room (the layout was living room, dining room, kitchen, from front to back). They tried to sell me a Fairly Large box of Lucky Charms for $130, which was ridiculous even in the dream.
I ended up settling for smaller boxes of cereal, running around $30 or so, and figured I was getting a good price.

Dec 27 (gore warning)
Dreamed I was trapped on a space station in a horror scenario. I was with a colleague, whose name and face I don't remember and probably wasn't aware of. Our other four colleagues were already dead by the time the dream started, their bodies drifting very gradually within the station. I was watching the vacant face of one of these bodies; her eyes were open and staring, and as I watched, they slid over to look directly at me.
This was reason enough for my colleague and I to barricade ourselves in one room. I can clearly remember there being a sort of shaft going down through the floor of this room, with one of those "staring corpses" floating inside. I shoved something down there to block its way in case it got any ideas, and then put the shaft's flimsy plastic covering on top.
After that, my colleague and I had some sort of terrible idea; we had three or so bodies (either human or some form of robotic doll) that we were going to mutilate and then arrange around the room as part of a ritual. Even in the dream, I had no idea what we were specifically accomplishing by doing this. Regardless, we set to work, cutting out the body's tongue and placing it in its lap, and then slicing open its cheeks so that its mouth fell open. At this point there was blood all over it, and more pouring from the gashes in its face, and we were just about to put some finishing touches on all this and move on to the next body when some rather-more-sane survivors burst through our barricaded door and saw what we were doing.
The second they broke in, my colleague and I panicked, realizing that they were about to get the wrong idea. We tried to call out to them that it was okay, hoping that we could placate them before they decided we were insane, but since I had no clue what we were even doing or why, there wasn't much I could say other than "NO! It's okay!" or something similar. Obviously they paid more attention to the bloody spectacle than to my unconvincing words, running into the room and then coming to a halt with expressions of shock and anger.
In retrospect, I'm pretty sure my colleague and I were the craziest peeps on the station.

Another dream was that I was a TA back at UVA, running a math class that my brother happened to be taking. He was, as usual, struggling in his classes, and I was tasked with putting together the exam he was about to take. The temptation to make it easier for his sake, or even to make it easier for him specifically, was almost overwhelming; however, I never actually reached the point of the dream where I chose how to structure the test.

Dec ?
I don't know when I dreamed this one, but I dreamed the family was visiting our grandparents (father's side) for the holidays. Somehow it was pretty unpleasant and I think I ended up making microwaved meals for myself to get by. There was something else about a game but for a long time now, the concepts I've encountered in dreams are terribly difficult to translate into real-life terms or even remember correctly... and this dream was no exception.
That said, I've been reading about kaizen, and I might be able to apply mind sculpturing to lucid dreaming in a way that makes my dreams clearer and less abstract (the book in question is One Small Step Can Change Your Life by Robert Maurer).

Fell asleep at: 2:00 AM

Woke up at: 10:00 AM



Dream 01:
I remember being in a white and sterile environment, much like an empty doctor's office or some high-tech research facility. I think in the dream I was fighting some monster, a theme that hadn't been present since I was, well, 12 years old. I seemed to have god powers in the dream as well, and the fight is heavily one-sided. I feel a sense of deep empowerment and relief as I slice up the enemy Kingdom Hearts II style, and finishing it off by slicing it with light powers.

And that is the end of it.



Dream 02:
I'm in high school again as I spot my old friend, Ace. It's an awkward introduction at first, since I kind of, let's say, burned a few bridges with her that I'm not proud of. A wave of embarrassment runs down my face, stress sweat, blushing, heating up, you get the idea.

In the dream she has completely black hair for some reason, and she is wearing a faded dark-grey jacket. She always seems to dye her hair (Even when I knew her way back when) so I didn't really catch on and do a reality check. Anyway, I start talking to her. She's still her usual chipper and weird self, and she kind of doesn't really care that I had burned bridges with her. Though her proportions have changed (AKA her butt was bigger for some reason).

I begin to wonder "Why am I still so worked up about it after all these years?" but brush that aside to continue having a conversation with her. We were at the cafeteria, but for some odd reason the lunch ladies and food aren't there. They always seemed to have a habit of setting up after the students got there anyhow.


NOTES:

1. The whole theme of fighting god monsters and reuniting with old friends is quite weird all things considered. These are all things that have never happened to me in recent years, due in part to me having wanted to forget about them. Maybe my subconsciousness is trying to tell me something here.

2. This is the 5th dream in a row where I was in some kind of foreign or fantastical environment. Being in my room used to be one of my biggest reality checks and now I'm barely even inside my house in dreams anymore. Perhaps I'm getting slightly more detached from reality? Could be.

With one week remaining in 2017, I had hoped to end the year with at least one last lucid dream. Within days of this decision, my resolve has been rewarded with a night of several intense dreams—one of them lucid:

INT. GYMNASIUM - DAY

I return to work after Christmas break. The company has rented a huge new facility in the interim. I nervously try to find my way around the strange complex. My colleagues are exercising in the morning before going to work: basketball, soccer, swimming--wait, what? Yes, two swimmers stroke past, near at hand. Suddenly, I myself sink up to my neck in water, too. The magical appearance of a swimming pool all around me startles my consciousness awake and I achieve...lucidity! I quickly begin to engage the dream, attempting to stabilize my awareness. But, as usual, I awake right away--this time due to my alarm clock's chirping at 6:21 AM.

I have had similar success in achieving lucidity in the past, after volunteering to participate in a dream study whose submission deadline I missed by only a couple of weeks. (Tardy subconscious! But better late than never.)

3 mg melatonin, 1500 µg vitamin B12, and brief meditation before an 11:15 PM bedtime.

As I was walking around a big goat like creature with horns attacked me: Fear me, for I'm great Krampus!
I laughed on that. As I walked it ran against me... and I slapped it and one horn had fallen from its head broken. And creature vanished. I tried to find it, but... well I was walking around for some time and I didn't find it. When I was in one house I saw a man who was looking on window where flies flew. And that man told me: You are looking for Krampus- one of the flies saw him, we must extract it from its brain (as if fly has any brain) I tried to catch the fly but I squashed it accidentally.

When I got out I was in my city so I walked to bus station to take a bus to my village. But on the station I saw some crates full of clockmakers tools close to garbage bins. When I saw that I quickly started to look any usable tool I saw there not wanting to let those tools be wasted... Sonia walked around me, while calling, that I will miss my bus home. I told her to take that bus, that I need to save those tools, that they are unique and precious. So she went with the bus and I was left on the station, searching through crates till the end of dream.

Remarks
I saw a film on TV named Krampus(2015) and when my 5 years old daughter told me that she fears that monster, I told her, that it is more laughable than scary.
My father was clockmaker and I was repairing clocks in past too... and I still have tools for repairing of clocks.
My friend had shoulder long hair here- she has about 15cm longer hair in reality. I wonder whether she got her hair clipped

12/27/2017
Walking around some fancy big house decorated nicely. Sitting down and seeing my boyfriends ex-boss come in and sit sort of close to me. He asks me what I want for my birthday, and I keep saying 'I don't know'. He pulls out a plastic tube thing that can expand itself and there's a girl across the room and it stretches one end from her to me. He wanted me to tell her what I wanted. I imagined myself what it would be like to be on plane to Paris and in Paris. Then imagined myself on a beach in the sand,
alone. The weather dreary with dark-ish clouds yet sunlight shining through. A bit chilly wind. The contrast of the image of it was beautiful. I was in a white sun like dress/beach dress. I finally said through the tin-can talk like device "Mani Pedi and a bottle of wine"

TAUP E W Letters
Dreaming of some kind of game where I had to choose a name and I chose "TAU P" or "TAUP E" and someone getting angry cuz the game wouldnt start because I had their name? I didn't care and kept trying to have "TAUP E"




So I haven't been around in years. Gonna update some dreams I've had in the last few weeks right now, below.



12/23/2017

Went to my boyfriend best friends dads house and was in flip flops walking in muddy water. Was packing my stuff up from us staying there, and stealing Now and Laters and Suckers from a candy drawer to take with me. Something about my BFFE; possibly BF related.

12/23/17 Fragments
-My sister bought Vanilla ice cream, and was carrying it in a plastic bag up the steps to my porch.
-Boy->Paranoia
-Me in a towel at boyfriends best friends dads house, in front of lots of 'football' type guys/men I keep trying to make sure I'm covered by pulling my towel up.

OLDER DREAMS START HERE; SOME CODED SENTENCES FOR PRIVACY.

so my dream was we were all in NC.. we were at Gma's and there was a secret huge room in her house collecting old stuff over the years of ours. I wanted to go in there. Switches to everybody being there and i see Lil D with cigarette in her hand. I find out C slept with S and i stabbed her then burnt the house down but tried saving the kids. I got outside to the road and saw the fire through the window (silhouette) and then i ran back to try to get the kid who was going back inside but when i walked inside everything was fine/.alive no fire and all talking and what not. I thought I was going crazy again, and told C what happened.
you can stop reading here.
coded for myself:
Switch to us being in a hotel room ( a nice one) and C has dinab weird tv.. music choice station 805 ? LOMF- smiles. i see dinab & ask; yes; chsbkapeirwu me frus. mad.


dreams:
i opened the front door and there was some guy sitting on the porch (i didn't see him though but his legs out my eye corner) and he was saying something but i couldnt make out what he was saying. i quickly shu the door and dead bolted and locked it. grabbed L and there was another guy in the house.. ran into our room and locked the door told C and me and L went in my closet and locked the door. C went and killed them with a knife. i somehow felt one of the bad guys knives and i was superly amazed at how sharp it was. dream over. (i seem to have woken up directly after this one)

dream two:
first of all-- L for real got tropical starbursts on halloween so ive seen them lately.. a two pack.. red and yellow)
dream-- on halloween i gave some tropical starbursts ( a few) and she liked them. on christmas i gave her a huge bag and she was really happy.
then something like... being in your van mom?? i think.. but anyway.. i was talking about how this tiny cup/glass still had melted ice and a tiny amount of water in it. was amazed the ice was still there.


also some weird dream where i was walking through some weird camp like buildings that were really small and everyone door being open and i could see what each person was doing. then i had to walked back up through them all inside them.. cuz i guess there was doors connected them. i was on my way to my room i think??? i stopped by a room with 3 women who were in a women's club and were staying camping at the place. for some reason one of them was getting a mammogram done/preparing for it.]


12/25/2017 - Fragment
Dream about some kind of fire. Don't know.

Date of Dream: WED 27 DEC - 2017



Dream No. 250 - Separated Sections

Dream 250 A - A Christmas Blessing
I don't remember what happened at the start of this dream. From where I do remember, I was in some random, unknown place. To me, it looked the inside of a van/trailer. I was thinking about sending a Christmas wish to WB via messaging on the phone. This dream simulated a lot of emotions common to the real life scenario (which I didn't end up going ahead with). In the dream, I did send the message off and then I just sat there, shaking in my boots because I thought she'd get really angry and even press block on me for trying to wish her a Merry Christmas.

The dream skipped forward a few minutes and I actually got a reply on my phone. It was a message lengthier than one I would potentially receive in real life. In the dream, WB told me that she bumped into my mum and that WB actually bought me something for Christmas this year. It was a red, felt-like ornament bent into some curvy C-shape which she had attached a photo of below her online text. As soon as I touched the photo with my finger, the ornament disappeared from the white table cloth in the photo and appeared on my lap. That's all I can remember for this dream.

Dream 250 B - Refurbished School
I don't remember how the dream started. From where I can remember, I was back at Killester for a visit... Again. I was walking around and as usual, trying to locate WB. In the dream, she was still in Year 11 where I wasn't in year 12. I asked a few girls where the year 11 area was and I eventually worked out that it was this three storey coloured building in the middle of the school, close to the library.

Some girls had classes on the second floor and others had classes on the third floor. I went in on the second floor and saw girls including EO, BB and EL in a classroom, but not WB. I asked them all where WB was but they didn't have an idea. Egat eventually told me to try and look in the newly refurbished year 12 building. That's all I can remember about this dream.

Dream 250 C - Crazy Class Baking
I don't remember what happened at the start of the dream. From where I do remember, I was going for a visit at Camelot Rise Primary School. I don't exactly recall what my intention was over there. I think I was trying to see if I could see any familiar teachers around from when I was there in real life. I eventually came across my year 6 teacher but wanted to avoid him for some reason. He ended up just walking after me but as soon as I started running from him, he started running after me!

He chased me down the one side of the steps near the main courtyard, I'm surprised that in the dream, I didn't fall down the stairs but was rather able to keep running. The wild goose chase got to the side of the biggest classroom in the school with faced out onto the year 5/6 playground. He got so close to me at one point and then he actually grabbed me and caught me. He was being super cheerful but I just found the situation extremely awkward and I just wanted to get out of there as soon as possible.

Soon, I was by myself again and I found that I was in the area of the year 4 portables. I eventually ran into my year 6 maths teacher and she was also very happy to see me but this encounter was pleasant rather than awkward. She said that her class was busy but that I was invited to join 4J for some Christmas festivities. I entered the classroom of 4J to be greeted by an unfamiliar teacher. She said that the class and her were supposed to be baking Christmas cakes.

The dream skipped scenes to my current house and apparently we were going to do the baking in my kitchen. I was helping the teacher to open the oven and this little blonde haired boy was standing near us, constantly haggling us for something and acting slightly bratty. I ended up telling off the little boy but the teacher said not to. I explained to her that they were in my house and so I had the right to tell him to keep safe and not tamper with my stuff. There was a snippet in the dream where it showed the finished product of the beautifully iced Christmas cookies. That's all I can remember for this dream.



Dream Trophies Achieved:
- None

-(L)-Caught a FA. I noticed the fan was running and the display was on even though the actual thing (outside the dream) was off. I got out of bed, and looked N, and then a gray and white cat got my attention. I walked over to pet it, and it purred. Suddenly, both it and Snickers were sleeping on my bed. (Also, this new cat was about the same size as Snickers)
-I was inside a cool underground facility in a room with tables full of unrecognized junk. I walked into an adjacent room that was smaller, the last, and the ceiling was a skylight. It was during the night, and I saw some parking lot lights, and the wall of a building. Suddenly, the dream let me know of a person that was walking closer to me with Satan. They were one the floor above me. I can’t remember the whole conversation, but I replied, “Is there a way that can leave without pain or death?” The guy said, “You’ll just look from your window!” I replied, “No, I can’t, this place is underground.” [Skip] Back in the bigger, first room, Alan was sitting in a random, comfy chair. The chair was also 2-sided. Next, we set up some unstable stairs (which consisted of one wooden chair, and the brown rocking chair (comfy) to try to reach the floor above us.
-Liberty Ridge had a road that came in from the northeast. There happened to be a gas station in the north corner, and another gas station in the east corner. So, we got out of the car, walked into the east gas station shop, and bought some cereal.
[New Scene]
I found myself in England with Jeremy Clarkson. I said, “Britain needs more mountains. [Talking a little about Washington mountains and hikes.]” He was like, “Yeah.” It didn’t matter where I was, whether I was standing there, driving somewhere else; all I saw was slightly rolling, green landscape.
[New Scene]
So I was playing Smash 4 with an acquaintance. I was Mario, and he was Greninja. He had the tag “Mew2King.” I beat him, of course. The killing blow was a reverse Ore Club hit. The stage was Kalos Pokemon League. Earlier, I saw some notes that M2K himself apparently made. It contained a list of everybody that we was going to play against that day.
-I spawned (I think) in a forest on a trail, with a backpack. The stuff in the backpack included a huge bucket of pencils, a 5-subject notebook, some scraps of foil, and maybe some food. Along the trail, I dropped the foil, and decided that seeing what was ahead was more important than retrieving the foil. I soon came to a river (deep, fast-flowing) that I needed to cross. There was ice cover up to 15ft from some rocks over the river. I looked around for a couple of sticks that were big enough to help me cross. I found one that was satisfactory, and one that was not. By now, the ice and snow were almost gone, so I started to walk across. Two steps in, and I find a very suitable stick, just standing in the river. A couple more steps in, and I come to a dual-floored deck. (I was now 15ft above the river) I carefully climbed down to the second level, and jumped from there onto a 45° deck slope. Now on the other side of the river, I decided to set up a beacon pillar, since it was getting dark. The light itself looked exactly like a thermal discouragement beam. The dream camera then switched and panned down the river for a while before coming to stop, where a few people were coming. Also I noticed two other beacons from that camera angle.
[New Scene]
I found myself in some kind of school, still with my backpack. I had no clue of what I was supposed to be doing. There was one point where I had gotten a writing utensil out, and put it back. Another scene happened, where a young female asked me if she knew me. I was like, “You look familiar…..did you go to KLE?” “No.” “Then nope.” [Skip] The TARDIS appeared in the floor around the TARDIS. They acted similar to black holes, except the compressions lasted for about 3 seconds each. Everyone (all 4 of us) rushed into the TARDIS to avoid the random compressions, but before we got there, compressions tried to kill us. We eventually got in one by one until all of us were protected from the gravitational forces inside the TARDIS.
Lucid Time: 30-60 seconds

DJ Log: December 26, 2017 – 5:30AM (USA Eastern)
• NON-DREAM • NOTES • DREAM • LUCID •

I am floating around a familiar yard with several people, one of them is guiding us around. He is my cousin, who will be known as "J" here. He is playing several records and I am scrambling to write down the artists/tracks on random bits of paper I find laying around. We move to another part of the yard and he plays more music and I find a stack of Post-it notes and write down several titles. I look up and there are two large cylindrical "cakes" of coiled copper magnet wire with a steel pin in the center of the tops. Next to both of them is a cube of similarly caked wire. When he places a record on one of the cylinders, a group of squares illuminate on the cube. There is a section with 3 rows and 3 columns and just to the right a column with 4 rows. The illuminated squares control the music playback. There are no wires connecting any of the components.

I look back at my notes and they are all blank. ...I think, "Oh shit, I'm dreaming. I need to remember what music this is so I can find it when I wake up." I awaken with my mind as blank as the notes. I got up and quickly sketched the strange record playing machine that I saw in the dream.

(Note: The music that was playing was very heavily technical, yet minimalistic drum-n-bass, similar to several things in my collection from Dylan & Facs under the Biotic record label.)

#518 - IDWILD - 2:30PM

I guess by now these In-Dream-Wake-Initiated-Lucid-Dreams shouldn't really surprise me (a bit of an oxymoron I suppose). I'm sure I've said this before, but I feel they more closely fit the category of DILD or DEILD because, I probably am already dreaming when I start them. However, sometimes I really don't recall what started them so it's hard to say, but it always feels like a real WILD. Usually I have a non lucid dram sequence with some kind of back story, but other times, like last night, I have no recall of what triggered it. Are they random or are they intentionally started after a brief awaking? Perhaps, it's linked to my history of waking in sleep paralysis that I have so often turned into a gateway. Sometimes I just don't know. I don't have a lot of LD's these days for lack of effort, but I haven't abandoned the practice completely so, I take what I get. Anyway, I am hesitant to try to start a new term, but IDWILD really seems to be a thing for me so I'm calling it that for now.This dream could have been awesome, but unfortunately, when you share a bed, there are external factors at play.

I find myself in a typical WILD transition. I have separated easily but it's dark. I try clapping my hands repeatedly and the effort and feeling of it makes the dream more vivid. The lights come on and I float around my bedroom and house shouting with excitement to be having another lucid dream after such a long period of time. I start to settled down and decide what to do, but a noise wakes me up.

I tap my wife to stop snoring and intend to make an entry in my DJ but I falsely do it in another jumbled dream sequence. I wake again note the time. I roll over and pass out for good. At this point I'm not even sure if my wife even snored of if it was a FA. I forgot the tricky nature of these altered states of consciousness and dreaming. Maybe next time I'll be more vigilant.

Morning of December 25, 2017. Monday.



I am with my wife Zsuzsanna in a white skiff of which is moving slowly over the beautiful ocean in late afternoon. She is facing me, seeming very cheerful, sitting at the opposite end of the skiff. Behind her, in the distance, I see a mountainous rocky cape. I vaguely anticipate the eventual appearance of Talos (the giant automaton made of bronze, from the 1963 “Jason and the Argonauts” film) from behind the rocky region ahead and on my right, closest to our heading. Becoming semi-lucid and recognizing this as the RAS factor with no attempt to modulate it, I decide to will the skiff to turn right, into a narrow estuary bordered by high hills, with the idea that Talos will not see us. Eventually, the water is shallower and we slowly pass, on our right, two military jeeps with about seven men in total. At first, I am wary of them, as I suspect they have weapons, but then I decide that they must be here to fight Talos and are not interested in us. The general impassively watches us as our skiff approaches an area too shallow to continue, but there is no sense of threat and they remain in their positions.

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In a dream, being in a boat is autosymbolism for vaguely discerning the physical body in sleep, more so when muscles are more relaxed. Water is the absence of emotion and the essence of sleep and this dream begins with the common water induction. I anticipate RAS mediation as a possible threat. The RAS modulation precursor and potential emergent consciousness factor is rendered as Talos, though Talos is only seen briefly in the distance. There is semi-lucid mediation (not modulation) which seemingly results in the transference of Talos to the army general and WLWS (Water Lowering Waking Symbolism, which is common for me). Right-side oriented waking symbolism occurs (while sleeping on my left side).

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This is a rather long dream, and I don't have time to type it all out in detail...

It took place at the train station, but we were having a biology lecture there. We also did some bowling. But weirder. I got into an argument with a childhood friend who was breaking an ancient sculpture for fun. I got pretty angry, but we hugged it out after. During the bowling we were supposed to do som multiple choice tasks and hand them in. I never did, because I didn't feel like it was important. The professor confronted me about it after class. I started looking through my backpack for some previous hand ins I hadn't done either. While he waited he looked through my notes and found a drawing of a flower. Quite psychedelic.

He said it was OK. "No hand in-s for a fellow acid head" and smiled. I started explaining the flower, he wrote "lucid?" on one of the leafs. I didn't think much of it but we started talking about lucid dreaming. He asked and I told him that I lucid dream regularly. But that it hadn't been so good during finals.
Suddenly it dawned on me that I had already had all my exams, so there was no reason for me to be in class. And further more it was weird that my professor was at my parents house... I realized that I was dreaming. He had a big grin on his face. I laughed loudly for a long time. But it sounded strange.

The dream was unusually vivid and life like. I felt like doing some tasks of the month. I spoke to my sister, but I can't remember what. I went downstairs and sat down with my parents having breakfast. I asked my father if I could have the vial of forbidden knowledge he wears around his neck. He pulled it out from underneath his shirt. He did, it looked like a jewel. I was expecting a powerful trip, but nothing happened. It tasted OK, but far from good, more like OK for a medicine.

After I realized that nothing was going to happen I decided that I would continue on with the tasks. First I would head outside and fly to a buffet in an ironman suit. But once I got into the driveway I suddenly got an overwhelming urge to take a dump.

Warning. It gets a bit graphic beyond this point.

Seeing as it was just a dream I just pulled my pants down right there. But nothing could have prepared me for the foulness that followed. It was coming out
by the liters every secong and it lasted for quite a while. It got so messy I just took of all my clothes once I was done and decided to continue on in the nude.

My sister came out. I showed her how the shit had bore a deep hole into the ground and now groundwater was pouring up cleaning it away.

Then suddenly seemingly for no reason I woke. I suspect it was a sound in the house IRL.

Edit: I got out of bed. Stomach was as is to be expected on christmas morning in my part of the world....