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this is a crucifixion dream I keep getting crucified in a dark alley when I'm laying in my bed
I woke up seeing 3 fire spot that I had to stomp out when I try to stomp them out a fourth fire started then fading out after that I woke up in my bed

Random WILD

Last night, I realized something is going on. I started to rock on my bed. Just my dream body, ofc. The swing (or should I say it was motion from left side of the bed to the right side and back and forth, flat on the mattress) was getting wider and wider, and I picked up a nice momentum, when movement continued by itself. next thing I know I'm standing next to my bed, not in this room, but my childhood room, I think.

Don't remember how I got outside. But I'm standing on a rooftop of a skyscraper in a super modern city. I'm looking down and all around, no fear of height at all. I decide to climb up to the top of the tallest building. So i go through buildings, on the sidewalk. There are some new police recruits practicing climbing on the rope and doing some police actions. I get to the top, there are few more steps I need to take to stand on the highest point. The sun is setting and it's beautiful, I feel quite accomplished.


Few nights ago.
All I remember now is that I was in Iran.

Another night I was in Iceland. We landed there on our way from Europe to the west. Walking around the airport, stores, luggage, my brother, food...

EDIT
I just remembered this cool part about the lucid.
As I'm standing on the roof of this huge skyscraper, among other people milling around, there is a family with 2 year old boy. Sun suddenly shines through the clouds and everybody is so surprised and happy. I realize that in this future, there is no sun. Little boy gets down to the ground and is rolling around so happy to see the sun. I feel it's warmth on me.

Ctrl+F "lucid" if you just want to read that part, which is "round 3 of dreams"


Here are my dreams from the night of February 14 to 15, 2018. I had a very nice dream chain in the third round and other than that just some vivid or interesting dreams.





First round of dreams.
"Restaurant Job. "

I woke up after a few hours sleep like I usually do. I tried to think of any dreams, but they all seemed too blurry. I thought of maybe two or three things clearly, but needed to get up to use the bathroom. I laid back down, thinking I would remember whatever I remembered next time I woke up without writing it. Or that I would have a better chance of remembering if I laid back down and thought about it, instead of writing. Well, I only remembered one part from that, but its alright. I needed the sleep.

That part was that I was at a rectangular table in front of my old house, at the end of the driveway. And I was talking about circumcision trauma. I don't remember much else of that part.

There was also something at the end of my Nana's drive way with my Uncle. There was some kind of shelf or table we were standing around.

So then I fell back asleep and had a very eventful dream.

There was something about a google search saying to eat watermelon before bed to induce lucid, dreaming. I think there was some nutrient that the watermelon contained. I was thinking that will make the person need to pee a lot but maybe that's part of the goal of the technique. I might actually try this.

There was a part where I was in a gym. It was more detailed but now I only remember it vaguely.

Then I guess I was showering after the gym, and before I was showering, I was applying a lot of white lotion to my body. (Note to self #1*. ) I remember reaching a little farther than I could in waking life to my back and massaging my own back, thinking, wow, I should give myself a back massage more often. I was massaging my own back and shoulders. That could have been a dream sign because my arms would have to be an extra two feet long to reach that far! . Also, while doing this, I was thinking it didn't make as much sense to do this before I showered, since it would wash all the lotion off.

Then I was with a bunch of people at these tables near where I went to fifth grade. With people from grade school only closer to their current age. I must have gotten up and come back to see that my friend G F (male) was at one table and a woman I knew, maybe L K or K S, was at the other table. There was this thing where I had trouble deciding whether to sit with G F or the woman. I sat with the woman, thinking I could invite G F to sit with us and we could all sit together. But, for some reason I wanted to just sit with the woman, maybe to not have to compete with G F. G F came over after a while and was mad at me. I tried to explain myself and invited him to join us. He sat with us. I had left my hoodie at the table with G F, draped over a chair, so he wasn't expecting me to have sat somewhere else.

Then we were all working around this computer monitor but instead of being perpendicular to the ground, it was parallel. I call this horizontally mounted but it isn't the same word. We were all making a slide show, each of us using a small part of the computer screen, all sharing one monitor. I started to think the woman who was there might want an easier to use monitor, so I went to get one that I thought was in a nearby closet. I had my old Sony monitor in mind from waking life. On the way to the closet, I saw my friend R F, and we went in to look together. We didn't see a monitor, but the closet had these tall shelves each with four big black box fans. The box fans were blowing towards each other. R F said that it was much cooler in here, and gave a temperature reading. I thought of taking one of the fans, but he said we shouldn't because it needs to be this cool in here. I actually felt the temperature difference in the dream which was cool.

Without the monitor, and seemingly having forgotten all about the project we were working on at the table, R F and I went to see what the temperature was like near another wall.

On our way there, a woman who kind of reminded me of an art teacher from high school, Ms. T, asked for our help with a restaurant. She needed help serving the food or something. We followed her to where that was.

I walked up a big flight of stairs to the restaurant floor, and there was a square seating arrangement. I walked around and noticed a transgender person I may have noticed in a previous dream. I felt bad for looking at them too long and looked away. I felt a sense that this person had been in a previous dream that night, and decided if I saw them again, I would become lucidly aware, but did not see them again. I also saw R M and some other people from high school. I think the seating arrangement changed from a big square to everyone being at tables and I was taking peoples food requests. Then I went back down the stairs and I saw my friend S R and another younger guy who had a gangster vibe. The gangster vibe guy was mad at S R and he flung a tiny white piece of plastic that he had ripped off a plastic bag at S R. It was the size of a fingernail. At first, I thought it was a fingernail, but it turned out it was just plastic. It was maybe half an inch long, and a quarter inch of it got lodged into S R's skin, I think on his arm. I was looking at it like, wow, that really cut through his skin pretty deep. There was no blood but it kind of scared me. I forgot what they were fighting over.

So then I saw Ms. T and she asked me about where to deliver the food. I realized that while I had taken everyone's food requests, I had not identified what seats the food should go to. I tried to remember people by name or create some kind of seating chart in my mind but it was too late, the food was already made.

There was a guy dumping his plate over his head and behind his back. I saw this and caught his food on another dinner plate. I was amazed at how good of a save that was. Everything landed on the new plate just like it was on the previous plate. It was onion rings and some kind of cheese steak sandwich. The guy was upset because instead of the cheese being melted all over and into the rest of the sandwich, it was just melted to one side of the bun. I thought of putting his sandwich in the toaster to make the cheese melt more. I was kind of being apologetic about it and trying to help in whatever way I could.

I forgot if anything else happened in that part. I might have been thinking that I am not a "perfect Jesus".

I woke up and was thinking back through the dreams. There is a funny effect when this happens lately that if I drift back to sleep, I will dream of another scene and then think that was interjected back in the dream I previously had. I started to have another dream of a well known actor dressed as a knight outside of a movie theater. He kept multiplying so another of him would pop onto the screen from a different angle or doing something else. There was some kind of music playing I think as he did this. I think I noticed I had started dreaming again and remembered, wait, I am not done remembering the other dreams yet! Then I woke up.

I forgot some earlier stuff but I don't mind because I needed the sleep. It looks like I didn't write this D J entry until 1 in the morning so that's pretty good amount of sleep. I wake up a lot throughout the night naturally, usually after dreams, so i don't need any alarm clocks.








Second round of dreams.


This "round of dreams" contained a bunch of very eventful and long dreams but I just consider it one "round of dreams" because it was the dream activity between two dream journal entries.

I forgot some from the beginning but here is where my memory starts, and there are parts where I don't have a memory of what happened along the way.

I was in the room I lived in growing up at my Nana's house. I was looking through this childrens book full of really vivid artistic pictures of various types of dragons. I was flipping through the pages in reverse. I remember one grey whale dragon that as I reverse the pages seemed to disintegrate or fall apart. Like in one page its jaw was attached and in the next page its jaw had fallen off and was just showing red flesh. I know they were really cool looking but I can't really get a clear picture in my mind beyond that. The final dragon was actually a Transmetal 2 Megatron with dragon heads for his hands. I remember looking at this thinking it didn't seem to fit with the other dragons who looked more organic. Plus, I didn't think Megatron belong to whatever company made the other dragons. But then I was actually playing with the Transmetal 2 action figure of Megatron.

There was a part with my Mom and sister in the same location. They might have been making food or something. I don't remember as much of it. I think there was a part where my sister was telling me not to go into her dream. I was about to go to sleep. I was sleeping on the floor to the left of my Nana's bed. My Mom was sleeping in my Nana's bed and she looked down at me. I felt this wave of anger or hatred like she didn't want me there. Then I woke up and thought that part through so far.

I drifted off to sleep after remembering a good chunk about that dream and dreamed some more.

Where my memory of this dream starts, the theme of looking for some place to live continued. I was living with my friend R K. He had a room I was going to be able to stay in. His friend and friend's girlfriend were staying on one side of the room. They seemed to be saying good bye as I arrived. I felt a sense that I might want to give them some time to finish saying good bye, but didn't. While I was near this wire shelf, the guy's girlfriend came to give me a hug. I was feeling bad about myself and didn't want to hug her that much so we had a really distant or light hug before she left.

Then I might have gone out of the room and back in, or it just followed from that point. But I looked on my bed, which was a big king size bed. Only now, I T, a guy I went to grade school with, and 5 of his relatives, were all sitting on my bed. They were wearing some funny knit sweaters and hats that all matched. I T said, "What up" and then a nick name I had. I responded like, whoa, I T! Surprised to see him. It seemed they needed my bed more than I did, so I thought of where else I could sleep. maybe on a floor somewhere.

Then there was a woman whose job it was to clean the house. She was telling me something to do and I didn't want to let her ego "win". It seemed like it was becoming an ego battle between her and me and so I resisted her instructions. She was fed up and walked down the hall. This room was all taking place on the room on the left hand side of my Nana's house.

I also remember at one point, not sure if it was here or earlier, seeing my Nana's upstairs hall way. But I was saying to my sister, this hall way is bigger than our whole house! And it was a long hall way.

Some other parts may have happened between these parts that I forgot.

Then I went down some steps somewhere, near a dock and some water, feeling really worthless and bad about myself. No where to live, really down and out. There was this Asian fellow at the bottom of the steps who was dressed in somewhat of a funny way, maybe as a clown or a mime, but not exactly. He was praising me for something I had done way in the past. I tried to think of what it was, and concluded he either had me mistaken for someone else, or it was something in college, back when I was more active in my waking life. He looked me in the eyes in a way that was memorable. He was trying to come up with a way to repay me. It gave me a good boost because I felt very down and out at the time.

Just then, a woman in a white shirt, with brown hair, walked by, asking for help. She kept asking for help as she walked by us, but did not stop walking. I wanted to help her, but I also didn't want to leave the guy I was talking with, because I was going to find out this good deed I had done. The woman must have been on some kind of auto pilot because she walked straight for the dock and fell right into the water, sinking immediately. I decided that the guy would be there later, and went in the water to rescue her.

I ran to the dock and dived down into the water without much hesitation. A few other people did, too. The first time I came up for air, another guy dove into the water who looked like he would save her because he was in better shape. But I went back under the water after a big deep breath, thinking I might need to open my eyes to see underneath the murky green water. (In waking life, there is no way i would open my eyes under that water, much less swim in it!). I forgot what happened to the woman who had gone underwater, if she had been rescued after all, or what.

But I moved on from that scene and went back to the stair well to talk to the Asian fellow. To my dismay, he was nowhere to be found. I knew I shouldn't have left him.

Okay so I forgot some more parts, but then, there was a part when I was seeing a guy in a dorm playing video games. The story was that he was a woman's partner but he was being selfish.

Then, the "dream screen" showed me four women sitting together and eating donuts at a food court table. Another woman came by and the "dream screen" showed all this glitter going all over the place as she joined them. One woman at the head of the table had two donuts, and one was for this guy back in the dorm the dream screen has just showed me. She ways saying how she got an extra donut for him so as not to be selfish. The women went on talking. (Note to self #2*. )

Then the woman all the way to the right hand side, who had joined last, seemed to have her attention drawn to the side. The "dream screen" briefly showed all these pool floats at the end of a hallway leaning up against a rail. Then, it returned to showing the woman, looking concerned.

She got up to see what was over there in the directions she had been looking. Then, I was kind of seeing the dream from a first person perspective from her viewpoint, or just behind her, but I was more just watching from outside like on a "dream screen", not really in it as an active participant.

This next part got really nightmarish. The woman noticed that there was a photo booth with the door partly open, down some steps. I could hear her thinking, "Who is in there?" and she approached the reddish brown photo booth door to investigate. When she got close enough, the "dream screen" revealed some really creepy old guy in there. Before the woman could pull away, she got sucked in to the photo booth. It was really freaky because the man became a kind of spider and the dream showed the woman very vividly being tied up like in a spider web. She was screaming for help. I was glad she could yell for help because someone near by definitely heard her, and would come to her rescue. But the dream showed this pointy, sharp looking giant spider with a big stabber thing on its abdomen go to poke her, like how Shelob injected people in the Lord of the Rings series. It was really freaky and I don't know how that suddenly got in there.

I woke up from that, kind of startled, stayed still, and thought it through. I wondered if I was supposed to become lucid in another dream to go back and help her, but my dreams usually don't have that level of continuity, at least in terms of form. There is some continuity but it is not that direct.

At some point during that dream, or a later or earlier dream, there was this idea of these people who had some dogs. The dogs had a special place in their house, like a room that was just for them. I was reading some text which talked about the dogs being named "Burr", as in, the sound you make when it is cold. There was also another memorable word on the page which I forgot. So I just threw that detail in here because I forgot other parts.

As I was recalling those, I fell asleep again and had a shorter round of dreams! Luckily, my memory of them held up pretty well. I must have needed the rest because I even napped this morning for an hour.

There was one dream memory, not sure exactly where it fits, but I was in a grocery store aisle. There was a black gel pen section and I took one of the black gel pens out of the packaging to steal it. I had it in my pocket and was justifying my actions in my mind because of how many rotten apples the grocery store has sold me, that I haven't got a refund for. At least ten dollars I spent on apples that looked fine on the outside, but turned out to be rotten. Good thing I dice them before eating them because I would hate to bite into that, not knowing what it was like on the inside. (I have wondered about the symbolism of this. )

I was checking out some regular items at the register, worried that the gel pen somehow had some sensor attached to it, and they would detect me with it on the way out. I tried to tell myself that wasn't likely to have a sensor just on one pen. I also remember thinking someone might have seen me through a camera and they were waiting to "capture" me on the way out of the store. (I guess this is my dream reminding me that stealing isn't the way to go in terms of having justice about my rotten apples. )

Okay so then there were some more dream details. Kind of a scene of looking into the hatch back of this Subaru, near the woods on the side of the road. It was like a camp site. I was trying to write in one of the notches on the plastic flooring of the trunk. Some letters using a pen. Maybe trying to dream journal.

There was some idea of someone stealing another person's prompting? Like what they were going to say.

There was this yellow football headed thing with funny googly cartoon eyes. I was looking at it in the trunk as I overheard people talking.

I was peeing in a big orange jug in the middle of the parking lot, near a walk way, and another guy saw me doing this. I was afraid I would get in trouble. The idea was that the guy never lets anyone get away with anything. My friend's dad, J S, was involved in the dream scene.

There was this part where an older man was yelling at a younger man, "Are you a lawyer?!" and the younger man replied, "No, I will never be one," as if to say he should stay out of situations or something like that. While hearing this, I was ripping a little perforated edge off a piece of white paper to use it to write on. Maybe I was trying to dream journal.

There was also a part with a lucid, dreaming You Tuber showing a video of how to modify the wiring of a head set to get a certain two channel sound effect. It involed opening the head set, separating the two wires, and then bending it over itself with tape. It didn't make sense to me. Apparently it only worked temporarily but then it caused the head set to be broken.

Other dream notes included "something with a guys website" and "parked near nature".

This was a huge amount of dream memory to keep all in my head at once before coming to write it, but I was just too tired. When I finally do get up to write, it is when I feel I have the physical energy. Like when my body will let me. If I try to push it, and interrupt the natural sleep phases too much, it tends to back fire and I will burn out. So I do it this way to keep it sustainable. Also it gives me a few natural W B T B's a night without needing any alarm clocks. I think alarms are bad because they might come in at the wrong time of a sleep cycle. My sleep cycles are never this cookie cutter 90 minute thing. I am in the "anti alarm clock" party of the lucid, dreaming world.



Round 3 of dreams gave me a cool dream chain. That just means I woke up between dreams a few times in sleep paralysis, stayed still, and went directly into the next dream with lucid awareness. It usually happens if I get lucid in an early part of a dream, and wake up, and stay still.

I forgot parts of it, but overall my memory of it turned out to be pretty good. Where my memory begins, Megatron and Waspinator are on the "dream screen". Waspinator was in robot mode and flying around the beast wars world. Megatron was using one of those statis pods to teleport something to Waspinator.

There might have been a part with my sister. I was fighting with someone. maybe there was more beast wars battling, or I was a beast wars character. I am not sure if I was lucidly aware yet. I remember being maybe a foot tall, and riding this little motorcycle thing, or perhaps being in beast wars mode where they are part vehicle, part animal, and making a Bee Line for a closing wooden door. I thought I would make it, but the door closed just as i got to it. I was running away from something or someone. Somehow I got into that door or maybe another door. I had a sense of being chased. Now i was in a human body, with clothes on. I looked underneath a metal storage cabinet and thought my best bet to remain safe would be to morph into an ant, or something else small, and go under that cabinet. I think I morphed into an ant and had to crawl out of my human clothes to get away. I was in a little office, and the people chasing me had caught up with me. But I had already morphed. There was a woman who came in the little office room to look for me, and she started patting parts of me that were floating around. I realized I must have morphed into a plant. Somehow, she knew that I had morphed into a plant, and she had caught me as such. (note to self #3*. ) She tried to coax me out of plant form and at this point I am sure I knew it was a dream. I woke up for a moment before another dream began.

Okay so then the next part was of me sitting in front of a television. (Note to self #4*. ) I had a great success with ree cognizing a dream sign, which was that I had an extra finger growing from my body. At first, I thought, oh, cool, an extra finger. Then I realized it was a dream! I played around with stretching my body as if it were elastic because that's what I thought to do. Then, I remember a part in which there was like this kid and his Mom yelling at him from a ramp. She was getting spit everywhere as she yelled, which was getting onto him and maybe on an open wound.

There was also a part with the red eye. I felt a pain in my left eye. I knew I was dreaming, so I figured this related to some kind of physical condition. I wanted to ignore it at first, but I remembered that in lucid, dreaming I want to deal with my issues instead of running. So I looked in a mirror looked more closely. It had a lot of sharp pain. It was covered over with red scabs and all bruised and puffy. I almost couldn't believe it was my eye. I thought of using a little energy ball like I heard in the audio book I was listening to the previous day. I didn't really have enough coordination to do that. But I was able to ask the dream for help and as I looked in the mirror, my eye returned to normal.

(Commentary from when I woke up as to waking life effects of this. I was sleeping on my left side, so it could have been some pressure was on my left eye. Other than that, I have no existing left eye problems. Both my eyes in waking life have always been fine. But I do have a left ear problem from using ear plugs a really long time without taking them out (foam ear plugs). There is a sharp pain in my ear if I put the ear plug in too far. So maybe that pain was translating into the whole left side of my face in the dream, and I was able to address it from there, where as something in my ear wouldn't have been visible to me. I will keep an "eye out" for if I notice any decrease in symptoms of left ear pain. Other than that it could have just been more symbolic in a broader sense. But it felt significant. )

At one point I was hiding under a blanket from someone. I might have gone in and out of being lucidly aware.

Then the "dream screen" played an awkward scene between a mother and her son. There was an awkward silence, and then the mother made a fart joke. The son wasn't amused and seemed kind of annoyed by the whole thing.

Some other stuff was likely to have happened that I forgot.

I next remember a dream begin where I am looking at a guy's chest in a sweater. It looks like he is bench pressing. Then I realize he is rowing a row boat and I am sitting accross from him. We are facing each other in a row boat. The water comes to an end and we scrape up on shore. The shore is actually made of the same material the street is made of. I kind of worry the bottom of the boat will be ruined. Then we continue rowing down the street as if the road is water. We go down a hill like this and get to a parking garage thing or something like a food tent at a carnival. Then I see both rowers get out of the boat and I am neither of them.

I excitedly think to myself "this is a dream" as I approach the food table, trying to make sure to stay lucid. I almost tell two people near me it is a dream but I hold back. there is a plastic container of grey circles that doesn't seem like food. Some stuff happens and I am looking for something cool to do. I get the sense that there is this green juice that everyone really wants. In a near by fridge, behind a counter, I notice a bottle which has some of the juice in it. The label has the number sixty on it but besides that, I forget the name. I fly over to that fridge, reach accross the counter, and drink the last of the juice. It is very sweet. It feels very good to drink it. There is a younger kid who seems sad that I got the rest. I feel kind of bad for not thinking to share it with him. I was in a pleasure seeking mode for a lot of the rest of this dream. But I think even that is a beneficial use of lucid, dreaming, because I can get out my desires for physical gratification in the dream world, and not need to do it in waking life, where for example careless eating could make me very sick. Being able to enjoy dream food helps me stay on a healthy meal plan in waking life without needing to have "cheat days".

In the next fridge to the left, there is a flattened everything bagel. I grab it, expecting it to taste like card board, and it kind of does. It doesn't stay stuck in my mouth though like I expect. Then I see some plastic containers with fruit and a pastry thing, like a muffin. I eat those and it is delicious. As I eat the food, I am mindlessly flying around, like a drunken bumble bee. I can tell I am sort of "food drunk" or "sugar drunk" within the dream but I just try to let go of worry and enjoy the sensory experience.

There is a part where I have this drawing of a three or four headed guy on gray paper. It has three frowny faces and I relate this to why I am off to the side by myself and not in the main party enjoying other peoples company. So I swipe my finger over the frowns and they become smiles. Then I go back to the party tent thing.

(Note to self #4*. )

I forgot some parts where I was walking through buildings. I might have eaten more stuff or seen some giant Pokemon cards. Just different wish fulfillment I guess. I saw a sign that said A T M and figured, this sounds fun. I went in to that lobby and almost thought it wouldn't be anything, but it turned out to be a dream A T M.

The first thing I notice is a packet of ten dollar bills similar to how post it notes are stacked, sticking to the A T M. It says "ten ups" which I guess means a free ten dollar boost. I look around for buttons and it looks like there are calculator buttons on the A T M. I enter some numbers, thinking about four thousand dollars, and pretty the START button. A bunch of money pops out, mainly hundreds and twenties. There are also drawings on pieces of construction paper that come out, which are mainly blue and brown. These are equally interesting but I don't take the time to examine them. Maybe they are the real prize.

I grab the whole stack of ten ups, with little regard for anyone else in the dream world wanting them, and go out side into the street. It is dark out. I see a bunch of people I know from college. I ask them if they want the money. One kid, A B (male) says, "I want all of it!" I give a bunch to him and throw the rest around. (there were some times I considered stopping and counting the money but that seemed to take too much focus. )

Success story part. In one of the parts where I was flying around a lot of people I knew, I saw this web site where there were guys posting success stories about various things. I had been seeing people from college, and so I was thinking of posting my success story of how I talked to people from college in my dream. i was thinking of telling them in waking life how I was with them in a dream and that being a success story. The page has white back ground and blue hyperlinks.

In the final part of this dream, I am walking down the street or hall way. All along the sides are giant Pokemon cards. There is Machamp and other Pokemon. I feel totally amazed and happy. I am telling other dream figures how I always wanted these Pokemon cards! A lot of them really look like Pokemon cards in waking life. One is grey and silver and there might be a purplish Gengar one. I am so overwhelmed that I don't really know how to take it all in.

Around that part, I woke up, and thanks to my new sleeping position, I was able to stay perfectly still. It seemed like a minute went by before I thought to recall dreams, because I was kind of preparing for another dream to begin in the dream chain. When i realized it was over, I was like, oh, no, let's get to remembering it! Luckily, I was able to remember a lot, but I wonder what else I would have remembered if I would have had that recall begin as soon as the dream ended. Waking life recall meditation has helped me with that memory "muscle". If I can pull up one detail, others start to come up, and then I have a whole big "movie" of the dream in my head I can rehearse a few times until nothing else comes up as I do it.

At some points during the sleep paralysis between dreams in the dream chain, I heard some auditory hallucinations of female voices saying various things which I forgot. I also felt some of those vibrational state feelings which felt kind of like intense pulses of my whole body, but were probably in my non physical body. Then I would "pop" into another dream.

I am pretty happy with this lucid, dream chain. I probably am somewehere between "fully lucid" and "semi lucid" for most of it according to the lucidity spectrum in terms of having all these dream abilities and stuff. But I mainly just enjoy the "lucid euphoria" of being like, woah, I am in a dream! And doing stuff. That's good enough for me and I figure the higher levels of lucidity will come with experience and study over time.





Round 4 of dreams.

I managed to get back to sleep one more time after those, which is wonderful. I didn't seem to have as many dreams or remember as many but once I noticed I had slept I tried to think back through them and here's what I got.

I remember seeing "Maharishi University of Management" written somewhere. It was something to do with M U M and Lucid, Dreaming.

There was another scene I only vaguely remember, to do with my Nana's steps going up to the dining room.

The last scene I remember was I was driving this truck and listening to a voice recording of my own voice. I needed to go to the bathroom so I pulled into this parking lot near a convinience store. When I got out of my truck, I noticed I had parked over the edge of the spot, and kind of double parked into the spot ahead of that. There was a guy near the front of the convinience store I didn't really trust, and it seemed the lights were just turned off. The whole time, there was some angelic kind of music playing in the back ground. I realized I wasn't in a good neighborhood and went back to my truck, thinking I might just go pee in the parking lot between the trucks, hoping no one saw me.

There was something else in the dream involving being out at night without much lighting.

I thought through these dreams and drifted back to sleep a little. That's what I like about laying down and thinking through the dreams without moving instead of needing to spring up immediately once I have woken up. It usually works just as well, in terms of the quantity of details I remember, (if not better), but it is more restful.

I'm somewhere at some kind of event, it's 11PM. I remembered I had to return my rental car, but it was already too late (it was my own car, though). I had to leave ASAP. I packed my backpack with my laptop & other stuff, and drove off in a hurry.

I was smacking some bad guys/humanoid monsters using a bag (?). I was trying to keep them stunlocked so they couldn't counterattack. I was trying to protect my allies, who were following me.

Then, I was attacked by loads of beheaded kamikazes (enemy from Serious Sam). I shot at them with double revolvers, but they all hit me anyway. I somehow survived. I'd visited the 'Seriously' forums the night before. It's a fan site for the Serious Sam franchise. That explains that...

In another scene, I was besieged by a lifeform that could assimilate and possess inanimate matter. I cargo shit, 'taken over' by the strange slimy lifeform (attached to the hull) rose up to the sky, standing on its rear end somehow. I fired on it, hoping to kill the creature, but it fell on top of me and crushed me.

I had been lured onto a rusty derelict cargo ship, where I was confronted by Satan (who looked mostly human). He suggested I should just 'turn myself in'. Then two really hot women appeared, his henchwomen, who I think were assassins who were supposed to kill me (I think). I ended up accidentally seducing them (played with her belly ring at some point) and almost having a threesome. One of them was a Twi'lek, the other was human.

Then there was a scene in a graveyard. I opened some kind of 'gate' or fence. This was the last dream/hallucination before waking.

I was being hunted by a mob of angry people, like an inquisition. There was another guy also being hunted, and the mob seemed to want him more. We ran off out of a town, into a forest. I hid in the brush, while most of my pursuers went after the other guy, who just kept running. But three guys of the inquisition at the back of the pack spotted me. I think I climbed a vine hanging from a tree. I stupidly swung back and forth while the three men below men looked at me, confused. This is where the dream went on a tangent and got a little dirty. I came down and saw two young women by a building in the distance. They were talking. As I approached, one of them walked away, leaving just the cute blonde. She was way out of my league, but I knew this wasn't real without being lucid. Kind of knowing this is a dream and I can do whatever I please, I walked over to her and kissed her. She wasn't really having it at first, but as I kept going she got more into it. Characters' reactions in dreams are mostly based on our own feelings, so I guess that's why she was reluctant at first (I'm awkward when approaching people) and got into it as I got more turned on myself. We ended up trying to have sex, but I felt the dream was about to end, and it did. Right before it could get really interesting.

All I remember was being in a building, and fighting a video game 'boss'. The whole setting was 100% realistic, not all all like a game, but I could retry the fight as often as I wanted. The boss was just a person, but taller and very strong. Conventional weapons didn't seem to hurt him very much. I had this bomb, it looked like a German stick grenade from the second World War, but it had multiple explosives. I say 'bomb' and not 'grenade' because this thing was utterly devastating. I think I put the grenade in his backpack (or somehow attached it to his back) while distracting him. Then I ran away very fast. The explosion pretty much vaporized the large, multi-storey building. I assumed this killed the boss. I tried that fight a few more times. At some point, the explosion happened underground. I ran outdoors, yelling to people to flee as fast as they could, as the blast radius was easily a kilometer. We were on the street when the bomb went off. The ground literally started cracking open, releasing hot gas from the explosion. Someone yelled at people to avoid the cracks.

Morning of February 15, 2018. Thursday.



My dream starts in a house that I had never lived in. It seems to be what would have been the second house west of the King Street mansion, where I have not lived in over twenty years. My wife Zsuzsanna is with me. We had apparently been sleeping on the porch. However, two people are talking very loudly kitty-corner (diagonally) from the intersection on our street, and they are on West 10th Street. They are on their porch. It is three o'clock in the morning.

I am annoyed, as I want to sleep longer (though I do not feel tired in my dream so its link to a biological need for more sleep is not a key factor here, especially as first-level dream state indicators or DSI1s, such as beds or other subliminal signs of being in the dream state occur in over twenty percent of my dreams as does vestibular system autosymbolism). Eventually, a police officer shows up in a police car on the other side of the street. He notices me at the porch windows and I point with my right finger in the direction of the annoying people (to my right, which means I have subliminal awareness that I am in the dream state, as I sleep on my left side, which is resultantly more closed off from the environment I sleep in). He goes over to tell them not to be doing this. (I assume that someone else had called the police.)

A short time later, Zsuzsanna and I are in the Cubitis house without my dream self even noticing. It is still around three o’clock in the morning, yet I notice the sky has the appearance of approaching dawn. (I see this through the back and front windows, in that order. I am never outside at any point in this dream.) This concerns me. I know it probably means humanity does not have much longer. Still, Zsuzsanna has a cheerful attitude and it seems that it may actually be a lesser threat than I had thought, as it might be normal for this time of year. I am overheated when I wake but not with as ill of a feeling as I sometimes get when it is too warm.

---

Two environmental factors had influence on this dream; the heat, and someone talking outside our window as I was sleeping. Still, the sun symbolizes emergent consciousness and dawn would be analogous to leaving the dream state. RAS does not take the form of a police officer very often, but it is a good indicator, as RAS could be seen as a biological “police officer”, with the purpose of preventing sleep from lasting too long, especially under perceived real environmental aspects as a survival mechanism.

Because of this dream, I can more specifically validate the intersection symbolism as relevant to most dreams that feature this as a main focus. It is simply autosymbolism for the neural gating of RAS mediation, the subliminal choice to remain asleep or to wake. The evidence is obvious. The police officer as RAS, though not here inherent to the WAF in this case as he is on the opposite side of the street rather than being close to my dream self, is going to the house kitty corner from where Zsuzsanna and I are sleeping on the porch (which is autosymbolism for a specific level of unconsciousness closer to the end of the sleep cycle). I point out (to RAS) the house diagonally from where I am (and this is actually a form of faux lucidity with actual liminal dream control being a lesser factor, faux lucidity being dream self behavior based on the virtuous circle of dream state knowledge without being lucid and liminal dream control more about creating and controlling the dream at its core without recall of what a dream is as in apex lucidity). Instead of dominating my dreams as RAS usually does in the final stage of the sleep-wake transition, he goes over to tell them to stop so that Zsuzsanna and I can sleep (dream) longer. However, even though RAS autosymbolism did not trigger the WAF (waking alert factor), I see evidence of the approaching day, "sooner and brighter than I want”, as the emergent consciousness factor, and in this heat, it is seen as a somewhat negative environmental aspect.

---

Morning of February 15, 2017. Wednesday.



I am with Zsuzsanna in Cubitis. We are mostly watching the nighttime sky and standing near Highway Seventeen at first. The stars are beautiful. There are no other people around.

At one point, there is a large sparse group of what I first take to be stars. It turns out that they are UFOs that move northeasterly across the sky (above the western horizon), almost like equidistant dust motes. As I watch, there is one larger object amidst the others that moves to the front of the group. It is white and glowing. It goes through two transformations; an overhead view of the Starship Enterprise (original design) and a white silhouette of a man (as big as the previous Enterprise image) with his arms out (perpendicular to his body). This feature moves erratically ahead of the group as if moving through an invisible maze, with a comedic sense. There is a typical factor of liminal dream control here, as I am very vaguely aware my expectations are influencing the UFOs somehow, but it is not enough to cause me to question my level of consciousness, even though it relates to my most common form of autosymbolism - vestibular system correlation that is additionally validated by the “body as vehicle” dream state association where the spaceship becomes the figure of a man. (Also, it is curious that I witness both the Enterprise and flying man from the top, which, from my viewpoint, would imply “they” are flying sideways, though this is a result of sleeping on my left side in the same orientation as the flying “man”.)

My dream shifts and I am in my Cubitis bedroom. I still seem to be watching the entire sky, though there is a strange bilocated distortion (as if my view is from indoors and outdoors at the same time - a very common dream state ambiguity caused by the liminal awareness of my physical body being in bed). The stars appear somewhat dim even though there are dense clusters. Ambiguity, caused by a shift in the level of unconsciousness, seems to be that I am looking at cheap wallpaper with a sketchy outer space design on it (which is also a result of liminal space autosymbolism, a wall being the implied barrier between dream self identity and conscious self identity, thus this dream is a unique form of combined autosymbolism of liminal space awareness with vestibular system correlation). The wallpaper at least covers the west area of the room (where there were otherwise large windows) and at least part of the south area.

---

Morning of February 15, 2018. Thursday.



My dream starts in a house that I had never lived in. It seems to be what would have been the second house west of the King Street mansion, where I have not lived in over twenty years. My wife Zsuzsanna is with me. We had apparently been sleeping on the porch. However, two people are talking very loudly kitty-corner (diagonally) from the intersection on our street, and they are on West 10th Street. They are on their porch. It is three o'clock in the morning.

I am annoyed, as I want to sleep longer (though I do not feel tired in my dream so its link to a biological need for more sleep is not a key factor here, especially as first-level dream state indicators or DSI1s, such as beds or other subliminal signs of being in the dream state occur in over twenty percent of my dreams as does vestibular system autosymbolism). Eventually, a police officer shows up in a police car on the other side of the street. He notices me at the porch windows and I point with my right finger in the direction of the annoying people (to my right, which means I have subliminal awareness that I am in the dream state, as I sleep on my left side, which is resultantly more closed off from the environment I sleep in). He goes over to tell them not to be doing this. (I assume that someone else had called the police.)

A short time later, Zsuzsanna and I are in the Cubitis house without my dream self even noticing. It is still around three o’clock in the morning, yet I notice the sky has the appearance of approaching dawn. (I see this through the back and front windows, in that order. I am never outside at any point in this dream.) This concerns me. I know it probably means humanity does not have much longer. Still, Zsuzsanna has a cheerful attitude and it seems that it may actually be a lesser threat than I had thought, as it might be normal for this time of year. I am overheated when I wake but not with as ill of a feeling as I sometimes get when it is too warm.

Two environmental factors had influence on this dream; the heat, and someone talking outside our window as I was sleeping. Still, the sun is autosymbolic of emergent consciousness and dawn would be analogous to leaving the dream state. RAS does not take the form of a police officer very often, but it is a good indicator, as RAS could be seen as a biological “police officer”, with the purpose of preventing sleep from lasting too long, especially under perceived real environmental aspects as a survival mechanism.

---

Because of this dream, I can more specifically validate the intersection symbolism as relevant to most dreams that feature this as a main focus. It is simply autosymbolism for the neural gating of RAS mediation, the subliminal choice to remain asleep or to wake. The evidence is obvious. The police officer as RAS, though not here inherent to the WAF in this case as he is on the opposite side of the street rather than being close to my dream self, is going to the house kitty corner from where Zsuzsanna and I are sleeping on the porch (which is autosymbolism for a specific level of unconsciousness closer to the end of the sleep cycle). I point out (to RAS) the house diagonally from where I am (and this is actually a form of faux lucidity with actual liminal dream control being a lesser factor, faux lucidity being dream self behavior based on the virtuous circle of dream state knowledge without being lucid and liminal dream control more about creating and controlling the dream at its core without recall of what a dream is as in apex lucidity). Instead of dominating my dreams as RAS usually does in the final stage of the sleep-wake transition, he goes over to tell them to stop so that Zsuzsanna and I can sleep (dream) longer. However, even though RAS autosymbolism did not trigger the WAF (waking alert factor), I see evidence of the approaching day, "sooner and brighter than I want”, as the emergent consciousness factor, and in this heat, it is seen as a somewhat negative environmental aspect.

---

I’m walking out on my deck
I start walking down the steps
But my eyes wouldn’t open completely
I see spider webs
I walk through one
Near the bottom I see whispy webs
Then I had a moment where I was out of my timeline
I thought about those floating webs that float through the air
Those thoughts became a reality
And they had landed on the steps and grass
I say i was out of time because they were suddenly just there
Then my eyes decided to close completely
I didn’t want to see if there were spiders 🕷
I ran across the grass towards the bottom of my garden
But I thought perhaps I had gotten off track?
I believed I was heading towards the Cherry tree
I managed to open my eyes a little
I see branches and twigs
I can’t stop myself from going into the tree
I feel nothing though
I’m so close, that it shocks me awake

I had this dream during an afternoon nap. I’m trying to work out what it could mean. I’m waking life I am petrified of spiders, even though I didn’t actually see one in my dream, just white floating webs landing on the stairs and grass.

Fell asleep at: 10:30 PM

Woke up at: 6:30 AM


I think the dreams I had last night were about as vivid as Day One, but I'm pretty sure I forgot about them as soon as I woke up. All I remember are bright white flashes.

1) A game was going on where we had to find something. There was a guy bothering me though. As soon as I got away I uncovered something and transformed into a character with a glittery yellow/bone white top hat/bunny ears, long staff and suit.

2) I recall a point where I became lucid and was looking around a alley but it didn't last long.

I was at a school with other people, can not remember what I was there for. I then found myself in my apartment and open my front door. Something felt very strange but I could not put my mind on what it was. That's when I hear a loud bang behind me. It sounded like it came from my room but I am the only one who lives in my apartment. I run out from room and saw the light from the other room in my apartment turned on and then turned off.

The strange thing is I don't have room lights for the room so there's no way it could have turned on. That's when I knew I was dreaming. Both of the door's slammed shut while I was outside at the living room. I look to my room and made an attempt to open the door but it would not open no matter how much I pulled on. I began to feel heavy and I began saying you are not going to do this to me.

That's when I felt a sharp pain at my stomach as I try to turn on the living room lights as they kept turning on and off. I fell to the floor and woke up feeling confuse.

Here are the dreams from the night of February 13 to 14. I had a lucid dream in the middle of it all and the rest were non lucid. Feb 13 was a really busy day, so I was probably more tired than usual throughout the night, which led to kind of deeper dreams in a way.


CTrl+F"lucid" if you want to skip to that part.





Round 1 of Dreams.

These dreams were really interesting. I don't remember even one clear detail but it was like I was remembering a bunch of dreams within that dream that I hadn't actually had. I was so tired from the day that I couldn't remember a thing from these.



Round 2 of Dreams.
"Eating Quarters" / "Chocolate Hands" / "Flamethrower Police. "

I think there were some earlier parts that I forgot. Where my memory of this dream starts, I was sitting around with some friends setting up for a meeting. I had my text book for the group and as I looked through it, a 20 dollar bill popped out. I was surprised to find it but the thought if it being a dream didn't occur to me. I asked the other group members whose it was. I was reassuring them that I am the treasurer of the group, and therefore, they could trust me with the money.

Next thing I remember is sitting at a table with some people including my friend S J from high school, who spoke very quietly. (I am going to switch to present tense and see how that goes. ) S J is telling us all how he remembered his first round of dreams, and they were very interesting. "Remembering the first round of dreams" has significance to me because I often see those as some of the most unlikely to remember, but can be very interesting. S J is at the head of the table and maybe I am too, and someone along the left is asking S J to speak louder.

Next scene I remember, I am in a room, feeling some apprehension. I have some art which I am attempting to hide. Built into my bed is a long rectangular box, as if a rectangular section is cut out of the bed, for the box to be put into, like it is a hiding place. At one point I am pouring some liquid into the bottom of this card board box. Then I am there with the Land Before Time Characters and we are cowering in fear behind some desks or dressers around the room. We are afraid there is someone or something coming to get us. A dog comes into the room but instead of being fearsome, it turns out to be very friendly and nurturing. We are no longer afraid.

In the same room there is a scene where I and/or some other people are using spray deodorant. My Dad and Uncle M are talking about some kind of party.

Next Scene. I am heading down the road past my high school, thinking of being on the way to some kind of club. (Note to self #1*. ) I am battling in my head with my Dad and Uncle about whether or not I should be going to this club, kind of like a partying bar kind of place. As I drive, I notice that some huge trees are laying accross the road in front of the school. One of the trees must be over 100 feet tall. Several workers are clearing all of the fallen trees as I drive through. Now, instead of driving, I am walking. I see some guys on blue skate board things with foot pedals so they can ride around on them while using saws or weed whackers to clear the debris.

I walk further on and reach a chain link fence. My friends R A and T S are by the chain link fence on their hover board things, clearing debris. I tell them their job looks like fun. As I walk through, people are saying I am so weird.

Now R A and T S are snapping a football to each other. I walk through the chain link fence.

Now I am walking by the barber shop in my town and the place I had my first job. It is kind of dark. Some women I know, including M B and other women, come out of the place I had my first job at, and I turn around before they can see me. As I walk the other way, another woman I know from High School is walking along the sidewalk. She has black hair and looks very pretty. I start to talk to her and she morphs between M and S F. I am asking her what it is like to live up in that apartment above the barber shop, where N C lived in waking life. There is a big bay window poking out of the apartment which isn't there in waking life. We are also talking about how it is sad so many trees are being destroyed. As this woman and I talk, the other women come from the direction of that restaurant and now we are all talking.

I have five hands, each with a different kind of chocolate in them. In each hand, the chocolate is un wrapped and melting. I am also eating quarters. They feel hard and metallic. M B asks to try some of the white chocolate in my left hand. She is also wondering why the chocolate is all unwrapped, and I feel embarassed. I try to explain that the chocolate comes out of my hands or something like that. Two quarters in one of my hands become four quarters. I am not really enjoying the sensation of eating the quarters but I continue eating them.

An Asian guy walks by with a bunch of coins and dumps them in the back seat of a car that is parked there. I think he is eating coins too. A police officer comes by and puts him in the back of the car. The police officer pours gasoline on him. All of the women and I are feeling fear because of the police brutality. We can't see anything the Asian guy did to provoke this. The police officer blasts the Asian guy with a flame thrower, and most of the flame does not seem to damage him. But his right hand looks all blackened and charred and it looks very painful.

Now the police officer has me on my back and is pouring gasoline out of a vaccuum kind of thing on my forehead and hair. I am feeling scared what it will feel like to be burned.

The location changes and we are in a study room within a library. The women are looking from outside the room as the police officer and I are in the room. The tides have turned and now it is me who has the flame thrower and gasoline. I am not intending to hurt the police officer, but I want him to stay in that room, I guess until some other authorities come to take him to prison or something. My Dad and Uncle M from earlier in the dream come and look through the glass window at me. I start to worry that they think I am the bad guy here, and I try to explain how I am not the bad guy. I have taken the police officer's flame thrower because he was using it to burn people and I am only keeping it from him so he doesn't harm any one else. I am still afraid they think I am holding everyone hostage.

There might have been more to these dreams but I don't remember. When I woke up from these dreams, I was in one of those streams of thought again. I noticed it sooner this time because I identified this phenomenon, and started to think what I had dreamed of. I had a good recall of these dreams.

I think my dream recall is boosted by how I am doing waking life recall. Throughout the day I lay down and close my eyes and try to pretend I have just woken up from a dream and now I am in bed. So I try to recall what has just happened as if I had just been dreaming. I think this is already strengthening my ability to "reach" for dream details and use my memory.















Round 3 of Dreams.
"Establish Lucidity LD" / "Flying and telekinesis LD" / "Pain management technique. "

(I will go back to past tense for writing the dreams for now since it comes more naturally. )

The first thing I remember from this round of dreams was that I was looking at a box for a black massage table that could put the body at various angles. I have always wanted something like that for sleeping on my front, and I thought I had finally found it. There was a really comfortable part for my face. I was thinking I need to put that in my room for me to sleep on. (Note to self #2*. )

In the next part I remember, there is a guy talking about some pain he is having. The "dream screen" is showing how he does mental exercises to help alleviate his pain. The mental exercises involve single consonant sounds, colors and memory exercises. The guy is also saying how drugs are good, and I am wondering how he can afford so many drugs and keep using them to self medicate without anyone finding out. (I don't use drugs myself and I don't recommend anyone use drugs, this was just a dream figure. )

The next thing I remember, there was an Asian baby who the dream told me to follow. He was some sort of guide. So I am following this Asian baby through this blue maze or crawl space kind of thing which is above the main floor. As the Asian baby leads me along, he is picking up brown rice off the blue surfaces and eating it. We reach a point where it seems I am going to get stuck, as it gets very diagonal and narrow, but I trust the dream guide baby and follow along. Right as I think I am going to get stuck, the whole blue zone opens up. For some reason I wake myself up. (I don't think I was lucid, but I think I decided to wake up or something, not sure exactly what happened. )

I laid still and thought through those parts, and fell back to sleep.

In the next dream, I am in a kitchen, hiding some dirty cloths. I am wiping some messes up from the floor and the stove. It is not a house I have been in before in waking life, but maybe I have been there in a previous dream. In this dream, I think I was the only one home. There may have been some food in the fridge I was thinking about. There was more to this part but I only remembered it vaguely.

Now here is where I become lucidly aware I am dreaming. I am cleaning in a bathroom. I have a plastic bag like a clear produce bag, full of other plastic bags, like what I bring to the grocery store to get produce. I am trying to put it in the top drawer by the sink. There is something else in the bag, too. The drawers keep opening on their own, and I am afraid if I leave the bag poking out like that, people will throw garbage into it. I feel a lot of anxiety about this and try to get the drawers to close, including trying to slide the content of the drawers to the back, but they keep opening up.

I am not wearing any clothes in the bathroom. I hear my Mom come up the stairs to the room in front of the bathroom and I am afraid she will see my bottom. When i turn around, one door is open, but another is closed, so no one can see into the bathroom. That door seems to have appeared without having been there before.

I am looking in a giant mirror that takes up a whole wall and I notice a dream sign. It seems like waking life, and I explain to myself how this is possible in waking life. Then, I think to myself, maybe I am dreaming. I almost don't want to be dreaming! I go to do a finger palm test, completely expecting for it to not go through and for me to be in the physical world. Then I see the finger poking through on the other side of my left palm. I am somewhat dissappointed it is a dream! I continue to enjoy the dream sign anyway. (Note to self #3*. )

Eventually I lose interest in that and now I am lucidly aware it is a dream, there in the same bathroom. I can't think of anything to do. I try to come up with something cool to do since it seems like one of those L D's where there is nothing already going on within the dream. (Note to self #4*. )

I think of going to outer space, but I don't feel confident that I would succeed at that right now. There is a window I could fly out of, but I don't want to fly right now. I pretty much think if I try anything like that, I will wake up due to instability.

The thought "establish lucidity" comes into my mind. I do more finger palm tests, rub my hands a bit, and spin around with my eyes closed. While doing all this, I am kind of afraid that it will make me wake up, too. the dream continues though and I do some nose pinched breathing, with two breaths in and out fully. With my dream eyes closed, I see this very vivid, almost neon looking image of a stool. (I wonder if I could have used this to sort of create a new dream within that dream but I was afraid it would make me wake up so I opened my dream eyes again. ) With my dreams eyes open again, I see one of the walls is missing from the bath room. I see a bunch of people in the next room past the bathroom.

I see a woman I know who is kind of like G D. I think she wants me to talk to her, but it is like I can't decide to really do anything. I see a glass window on the next door up ahead, and my first move is to fly straight into it. I think I will go through it, and maybe impress everyone, but I just collide with it, making a noise. As I do this, two girls and their mom or an older woman are leaving, heading down four to six flights of stairs. I decide next that I will race them down, so I dive headfirst down the stair well, flying down and controlling my flight. They are impressed when they meet me at the bottom of the stairs. I open the front door telekinetically and we all walk out. There is a fence ahead with a closed gate. I fly over it while opening it with telekinesis for the other dream figures. I also notice some white screws and bolts on the ground near the fence, which I try to lift to myself with telekinesis. I am able to successfully make one come to me but the other stay put. I don't feel in total control but I am going pretty well and I know it is a dream.

I may have forgot the very end of that L D if there was anything else. I kind of think I didn't really get to do the coolest stuff in the world, but I had some fun. Any L D is good practice. Actually, remembering to try to "establish lucidity" was great progress, and I should focus on progress I did make rather than what I didn't do. My stabilization efforts resulted in a longer dream and if I would remember to do another round of that every few minutes, I might be able to go further in exploring an L D. Also, it is my second time trying to nose pinch breathe, and I like it. It feels good to breathe in a dream and it kind of reminds me of meditating, since I am focusing on my breathing. Also, I flew and did telekinesis! That is pretty cool for cryin' out loud.













Round 4 of Dreams.
"Baby Guide" / "Nice Hug" / "teeth exposed" / "dad is a car" / "Rock music contest. "

My memory of these dreams started with me in a market place. There was more stuff before this but the first thing I remember is walking around some shelves in a market place looking at various types of oil. I am talking to a woman near by about the oil. There is a big bottle of coconut oil and another kid. We are sampling some of the oil. The shelf is about shoulder height.

In another part, there are two dogs both out for a walk. They go near each other and play nicely. This is also a vague memory.

Now the memories get a little clearer. I am at some guy's house, in his room. He has bunk beds. He has assigned me to watch something on a big television. The picture on the television looks very 3 dimensional. I also notice a bright computer screen to the left of it. I worry that the screen is too bright and I search for and put on my orange glasses. I don't really remember everything about this but it was like I was working for the guy or he was mentoring me.

In the next scene, I am in a bigger room outside his room. He his rubbing peanut butter or some other type of food spread on a cat's bottom, which makes a mouse go bite the cat's bottom. Then, the cat bites the mouse. I am watching this, thinking it is very cruel, because the mouse might have otherwise not been in harms way. The guys wife is around the scenario. In the context of this dream, my friendship with this guy is very stagnant, but I am not willing to really put more energy into it. It is sort of something I am taking for granted. I dimly want to put some more enthusiasm into it, but I don't feel I can muster it. The guy invites me to sleep over his house, seemingly as a way to be better friends. I felt like I just couldn't handle moving forward in our friendship but I was just feeling stuck. He was standing to my right when he said this. (I remember feeling this way with a girl I was dating in college, just emotionally frozen. )

Next there is a part with some ramps. My friends J D and J V and others are there. Maybe some young kids or some people that remind me of my Jamaican friend. A lot of this part is vague but in the dream I think it was eventful.

My friend J V (female) is already with another guy but she has a baby she wants me to hold. She is saying that I should listen to the baby and it will be good for me. I carry the baby around and in one part of the dream it is feeding me pickles from a jar of pickles. I worry that the pickles contain too much sugar or salt and they don't fit my dietary restrictions.

Later in this scene, I am with J V, the baby, and some other people, watching a movie of some kind of surgery on a projector. I am not sure if it was circumcision or something else gorey. I was feeling really squeamish and I just couldn't handle watching this. I admitted to them that it was too much for me and I couldn't finish watching it. I felt admitting this took a lot of courage and might have helped other people feel comfortable admitting that they, too, needed a break from watching all this violence. I left the group.

Next there was something where I was taking a disability test. There was this container of blue vitamin liquid that an older man was giving me and one or two other people. I was walking through two shelves thinking I should have asked for the full dose since when he poured me mine, I could tell it was less than what he gave the other guys, and I pulled my cup away early for some reason.

I was trying to put on two button down shirts at once. The bottom shirt was a short sleeve plaid one with various reds and blues that has a cool zipper on the shirt pocket. The shirt I was putting on top was a long sleeve button down shirt, but I forgot which one. I realized this might be too many shirts and decided to take them off instead, in order to put on a coat without being overheated on the bus. Then I was getting on a bus.

In the next part of the dream, I was in a place like a mall, and there were women around. I was surprised to see a woman from high school, M E, (those are her initials), and it seemed there were two of her. When I looked from her to the other copy of her, I wondered who the first woman I had looked at was, but I think they were both M E. She looked pretty and I remembered she used to seem to like me. I hugged the copy of her that was closer to me, and it was a nice hug. I was sort of rubbing the sides of her arms or torso. We were happy to see each other. I realized I wasn't wearing my retainer and dental bridge which has my false teeth on it. (I have two missing teeth in the front of my mouth). As I talked to her, she seemed to be looking at my teeth. She asked me, "what, are those colored or something?" and I explained to her that i was missing those front two lateral incizors. I felt kind of embarassed and I tried to talk with my upper lip over my front teeth like I do when i am trying to hide my missing teeth. Suddenly her teeth morphed before my eyes and they had some gaps too. So then we were smiling at each other. I forgot what else happened but I guess I was happy not to be totally rejected, as I usually expect to be. (Commentary: This part of the dream brings up strong emotions since I think my missing teeth hold me back in a lot of ways in life, but I can't afford the surgery. So I don't think I can really date or even be very social due to my missing teeth. I guess the dream wanted me to see this, and although it was some comfort that perhaps I could be in a relationship with someone with dental problems, too, I would rather get my teeth fixed and then be in a relationship with someone with "normal" teeth too. )

In the next part of this dream I am with my dad, mom and sister. There was something about eating a meal together. My Dad was tired and stressed because he was having difficulty providing for the family.

There was this part with this yellow leaf thing that was supposed to wrap around something. It opened up on one side to go around the thing, whatever it was, and on the back was a flap made of leaf that I noticed was more yellow than the other side. I was trying to explain to my Dad how the leaf thing has to be wrapped around the other thing but he didn't seem to agree. He was telling me how his Dad was just a car to him. Even in the family photo, instead of showing a picture of his Dad, it showed a picture of a car. I wanted to say that this was not the correct paternal relationship but I was afraid to actually say that.

Then I was walking at a local nature trail I go to often in waking life. I was carrying one of my house plants and lots of soil kept falling out. I didn't really understand how because the drainage hole wasn't that big in the planter. I was walking towards the gazebo. When I arrived at the chair I was going to put the planter on, I turned around to collect all the soil that had fallen out. I was worried that someone would take the plant while I was walking back through the trail collecting the fallen soil.

At this point I think I woke up on my front and my head was twisted all the way to the side which I usually try to avoid. Then once I adjusted I fell asleep really soon after that. The weird thing was, I woke up positioned on my left side more, with my neck straighter, but I didn't see how I could have even been laying flat given how the pillows were situated. Maybe I dreamed about being in that sleeping position.

In the next scene, a lucid, dreaming author, who I have been listening to a lot of pod casts by and just got 2 of his audio books, was writing for some kind of contest where he was talking about his future goals with lucid, dreaming. I was seeing the writing from the first person and I noticed the screen didn't have any blue light filter. It seemed he was struggling to think of anything or feeling discouraged. Some words appeared on the screen but I forgot what they were.

This part of the dream kind of became a rock song contest. There were two rock singer voices collaborating in a song together which I thought was cool. it seemed like one contestant had asked the other contestant to be part of his song. There was this box with an exclamation mark on it in the corner, like a darker purple box and a yellower exclamation mark, but the whole room was dark, so it is hard to tell. There was something about drug addictions. The judge of the contest was talking about drug addictions. This part of the dream was more surreal and hard to describe. That was all I remembered.









Round 5 of dreams.
"Mom heading home" / "Blue ear plugs on Jungle Gym. "

These dreams were about 2 hours of dozing, sleeping and dreaming. I woke up a little while I thought through some of them and then let myself fall back asleep and dream more.

I think I fell back to sleep and lost some memories here.

In the beginning, I was with my friends M R and N H and we were in a food court at the mall. I remember getting something like fries at McDonald's and some other food at another place. I was low on money. I might have toggled to being an employee there. There was someone saying it was unhealthy. This part is really vague.

One part I remember very clearly felt clear as waking life. But it was very simple. I had the dining room chair positioned with some legs off the carpet and some legs on the carpet. I was doing body weight step ups from that range of motion but as I did them, I noticed that the chair was uneven. So I moved it but then one of my feet was stepping on the carpet while one was stepping off. I couldn't get it to line up right. It was somewhat light out, like it would be during early morning hours as the sun is rising, but on a cloudier morning. The front windows to the dining room had the curtains open. For some reason that very simple part of the dream had a very solid feel to it.

Okay so then I was in some kind of a school yard. I was on a jungle gym and there was a blue ear plug on the ground. I had another blue ear plug in my hand. There was something about how people with blue ear plugs were weird or something. But I was like, these aren't even mine, I am just here at the same time as they are. Don't think I am weird.

Then I was in a bathroom and still had the blue ear plugs. I had a tupperware of urine in the sink with the lid on it. It was my more cube shaped tupperware. I was trying to hide it under some soap water or a towel and I was taking a bath. Then two other people wanted to use the bath. I said I will go but just let me dry off and everything. (Note to self #5*. ) The bath became a bed behind me. I remember this one part where I sort of fell out of the bath and fell in slow motion towards the floor. I didn't know it was a dream. As I fell, I fixed my gaze on this orange straw with pink lines on it, like a D and D or seven eleven straw. I remember gazing at it, thinking it would appear in a dream due to the emotions I was feeling in that moment becoming attached to or associated with it. Little did I know I was already in a dream. But I do that more and more now, if I feel a strong emotion, I will notice an object I am looking at and sort of create an association between those feelings and that object. Then in a dream I might notice the object and it could be kind of a dream sign. Funny I was doing that when I was already in a dream.

There was a little plastic bin of styluses on the floor. I was trying to put a pen cap on the stylus. I wanted to write, so I took one of the styluses and tried to write on the floor tiles of the bath room. I was writing accross four floor tiles, then beneath the first, on the next tile down, about how it is hard to have to make choices. I remember seeing that it was more etching it into the floor than putting ink on top of the existing floor. I was thinking I will never make it as a writer. In the box I was looking for pen caps to put on the styluses.

In the next scene, I was walking up a road from the water's edge, and I had long hair. I was brushing it and kept getting the brush jammed at the very end. (note to self #6*. ) It turned out there was this weird metal pen cap stuck in my hair that seemed to appear there out of no where. But it was a pen cap similar to the ones in the previous scene. My hair was all clumped up in it and I started trying to pull it out, but it was ripping my hair. Eventually I got all my hair out but was afraid it would be moldy from being in there. It turned out it was fine. It was silver with a blue end. I think I just tossed it on the ground and kept walking.

Then I was walking down the road more and saw my Mom's old white car in a semi circle drive way of a single story white house. It was my Uncle R's house because of the smoking. Another older white car appeared behind hers, with orange or red tinted windows, and then I actually saw her come outside to leave. It was good timing because in the context of the dream, she was just about to drive all the way up state to go home.

In waking life my Mom doesn't smoke cigarettes but in the dream she had a cigarette in her left hand. It looked like it had been partially smoked, and had ash on one end, but it wasn't actually burning at the moment, like she had put it out and was saving it for later. She was packing the car. She said "thank G O D for this cigarette." I hate cigarettes and I figured she picked up some cigarettes while staying at my Uncles. But I told her that the cigarette was not a think to "thank G O D" for and tried to discourage her from smoking any more. She hadn't picked up the habit long ago and it would be easier to break it now than later. I felt angry just to see the cigarette but when I realized I couldn't smell it, I didn't totally flip out. My Mom was telling me she was so numb and I knew it was from being active in that cigarette addiction again.

Then the car transformed into a pick up truck with some mean guys driving it and it nearly ran me over. It was like a red truck and it almost didn't have a wind shield, the way the view of the guys looked through it.

I woke up and tried to think all of that through. It took a few minutes to even come up with a single detail, but from there, a whole bunch of the dream flowed back into my mind.

That's all my dreams. Man, it takes a long time to write all this some days, but I would rather remember too much than remember less. I wonder if I will ever have so much dream recall that it will take 8 hours a day to write.