25th January 2021 Fragment: Something Daikatana-like? I visit several dream locations but a few of those are marshes like in the first act of the game. I remember going into a disused entrance. Dark, wet. Some blue light or reflection from the water. Vines and so on? I'm here to find a body and destroy it, a friend or ally's body. Someone else is either with me, or guided me here. 26th January 2021 Dream: I'm browsing the usual art site. I'm looking at someone's profile and see that I'm on some list of skilled artists this person likes, I think I am surprised by this, but appreciative. Later, I return to the same profile? I see I am no longer on that list and spot an entry talking about the reasoning behind including each artist under a specific category. I'm listed apparently because of some KH (from BL) piece I made. They also mention how and why they chose to exclude me from their favoured artists' list, but I forget the details. There's an animation on this entry... It's their main character, a dark-blue, almost black furred wolf/canine. The animation loops and the character grins as he cuts off the ring finger from his right hand. I feel disappointed, or hurt. Dream: I'm outside, a typical city of some kind. I'm not wearing a mask and feel that I should be. I'm at a sports area and there are dozens of people of all ages, including young kids, though I think mainly kids. I become concerned because none of these people doing sports or playing outdoor games are wearing any masks. It makes me apprehensive and I almost feel as though I can see the particulates of their normal breathing in the air. I leave this area. I remember some roads. It's day time but I forget what the sky is like exactly. I'm walking through some street under an overpass. Someone is walking along with me but I forget who. We are having a conversation and we pass several people, some don't make any effort to move out of our way even though we are practically up against a wall on the side anyway. I feel apprehensive again about transmission. I can't recall where we go or end up. Notes: - Maybe it's only natural that I've been getting these dreams about the art browsing again. Lately I have been a bit more active and have felt the same anxieties and maybe frustrations that I was feeling around the last times I was having this sort of dream. -- I think I felt so hurt because I feel people are so changeable and I have been finding it very difficult to connect with anyone in that world. Too often I end up feeling just too different despite having virtually similar interests. - The outdoor dream had a grey or desaturated feel to it.
Updated 01-26-2021 at 08:09 PM by 95293
this DJ is more to help identify dream control methods and tackle a system of dream control that works outnght, today are more abstract note Notes REM sleep is vivid to the point where clothing can feel entirely different to what's worn outside of a dream.the dream can react poorly in terms of stability if the form is altered.The effects of the dream aren't flashy because one's visual imagination may not have a direct point of reference.dream control in relation to magic systems isn't necessarily a shortcut, but it can help to organise dream controlThe brain likes it's realism, it's similar to "consensus" from Mage: The Ascension, and dream control seems to be oddly easier once no one is looking. WAKING TASK: find a reliable system to build your dream control around, and practice visualization that isn't tactile. Dream Points I managed to destabilise the dream until it changed most of it's topic.There was a really, really nice roadside shopping mall with multiple levels. I got into a toy war with a NERF gun that had multiple firing modes dependant on how you squeezed the trigger, automatic was "mid-way", semi-automatic was all the way, and the NERF gun appeared to have some kind of pneumatic firing mechanism. Techniques attempted: Shapeshifting (attempted a female form in order to destabilise the dream enough to change it's topic).Conjuration, attempted to conjure the book from hunter x hunter's greed island arcFlight, wanted to traverse the mall.
Updated 01-26-2021 at 04:48 PM by 65287 (Updated title.)
I had the car dream that I have started having again last night. The things I remember most from last nights dream were arguing with mom when she told me to go get in the car and when the car had the dead battery. When mom told me to get in the car and buckle-up in the middle, I first tried to argue about sitting in the middle trying to explain to mom that my sister could handle the middle better than me since she was younger/shorter/smaller than me but mom snapped at me that is was my sisters day to choose her seat today and that I got to have the font seat in her car yesterday and would get to choose my seat again tomorrow. When I then tried to explain that it would be really embarrassing for me to have to ride between them she told me that was the craziest thing she had ever heard and that she was sure no-one would noticed how we were seated. I then tried to talk mom into letting me and my sister go to the park that was a few blocks away rather than waiting in the car for her. I tried to convince her that this would be a better idea and that she could just come to the park and pick us up whenever she was done at granddads. She told me that she didn't think this was a good idea because she wasn't sure how much longer before she would be done and that the park was not on our way home. I kept trying to convince her to let us go to the park until she finally got tired of hearing it and got in my face and reminded me that she was in charge and that I was to get in granddads car and buckle-up in the middle seat now. She said she couldn't understand why I was making such a big deal about riding in the middle and waiting in the car, but that I needed to get a better attitude. I then went out and got in the car. While waiting with my sister, I remember she kept wanting for us to talk about granddad and share our feelings about him being sick and in the nursing home. I kept trying to get her to talk about something else, but this was all she wanted to talk about and the kept brining it up again whenever I tried to change the subject and kept trying to get me to share my feelings which I did not want to do. Once mom finally got in the car, I remember she was really snippy when she discovered the car had cut off when she tried to put it in gear. When I tried to keep telling her I thought the car was in drive and needed to be put in park in order for it to start, she would snap at me and get in my face and tell me to calm down, that she was doing the best she could. I kept trying to tell her this is why nothing was happening when she turned the key, but this just made her more frustrated and she ignored what I was trying to tell her. When the battery went dead after mom discovered the car was out of gear and tried to start it once she put it in park. I kept trying to talk her into letting me and my sister get out of the car while she looked for a jump start. I woke-up from this dream while mom was in my face telling me that she was in charge and that me and my sister were to stay buckled-up in the car. She was making it clear that I would not like what would happen if I did not do what she wanted me to do. In this dream, I really felt a lack of control as no matter what I tried to suggest or ask for I was stuck buckled to the middle of the front seat of granddads car.
Gotta type quickly before bed. Jamie Just a dream of Jamie talking to me trying to reassure me that nothing is wrong and she wasn't trying to make me jealous from the previous weeks dreams.... I swear it's like she reads my dreams then plugs into my dreamworld somehow. Apology The bitchy girl from last weeks dreams was apologizing for last weeks dreams. Wow. Rubiks. I was playing with a giant rubiks cube. It was really big with lots of colors. I began turning edges and suddenly it was broken and pieces were in my mouth. They tasted like hard candy. Jamie again? I was in some storyline dream with Jamie/ But can't remember. She was a blonde girl with a bowl cut... Okay. We were riding in the country at night on white motorbikes or mopeds. (Reminds me of the first lucid where I found jamie in a dream and she had a motorbike. Totally suited her). Later we are talking to someone about buying some other bike that was similar. The older guy asked if she was my girlfriend. Me and Jamie looked at eachother and said ,"yes." Trudeu Can't stand the Prime Minister and I can't even type his name right. I was in some office and he was there. He was being all FAB and acting gay... He was really annoying. And he was putting on fancy girly clothes. I remember just being annoyed and leaving. Floating A long dream I can't remember. I am trying to escape some complex. I am under people being shot down from guards on a rail above. I got outside the big building. It's night time. I remember I have to get a back pack back from a locker. I go around the back of the building. I am jumping high and floating as not to be seen. That's all.
24th January 2021 Fragment: (at the end of a long segment about family) Uncle M mentions "Bucaccus"; it is apparently some kind of organ, gland or hormone? He apparently had many issues with it when he was my age and suggested I get it looked at. I remember previously in the dream I had been having some kind of tantrum, throwing things. I apologised to my uncle and someone else there, an old woman? Fragment: Waiting for a train in a subway station. I'm wearing one of those new and modern drawing gloves on my right hand. I'm writing some kind of story on the palm of that glove on my right hand. I don't make notice of the fact that I was using my left hand to do so. The train eventually arrives and I get in; then when I get out somewhere else, I find that my little story has rubbed off completely and is gone and I try to remember what I had written. Fragment: Looking at some profiles on an art site. One of these profiles has thirteen thousand people who are basically subscribed to it. Part of the page seems odd and the dominant layout colour is incorrect to what it should be in waking life, it's a deep blue in the dream. As I scroll down I find extra sections, like multiple featured text posts with commenting areas of their own. There's also some section labelled "high-profile banned/blacklisted users". I look through this section, which only has a dozen of usernames, and find that some usernames start similar to mine but mine isn't on the list, I feel some sort of relief? This person's profile has a lot of issues with spamming? Fragment: I'm in my old home, my room. I'm visiting. I am upset for some reason? And then there's some kind of hybrid species woman; she's part octopus and she's sad for some reason. Her mom is here too and has the same features, but her mom has a blue tinge and she has a pink-ish tinge. In any case, I try to comfort her, but she is resistant to any comfort I try to offer. I remember at one point we touch one another a bit, half sensually, half not, like a strange dance? I am curious about the tentacles and she lets me touch them. This implies some trust on her part, I feel. The suckers nip on my skin but much less harshly than I expected; I feel that she has control over this and has made it so as to not hurt me. Her mother says something about how she could just cut off her tentacles if she's that sad (comes across as half-serious/half-sarcastic) and that they'll grow back. Her mother warns her however, that it will take months to regrow them and that during sleep she'll be waking up to what feels like every five minutes and bleeding or something. I tell her that she should do no such thing. I feel the mother's suggestion was too serious and that it would cause so much more damage than good. Notes: - The last fragment feels strangely ironic considering how I am feeling right now about something. - The tentacles had ends that were more squid-like than octopus-like, come to think of it. - I think it's been a while now since I dreamt of any subways or trains. It had also been a while since I dreamt about a website, specifically an art one.
Over the last week, I have had some new vivid dreams involving me riding in granddads reliant with my mom and my sister. These dreams are different than the ones I was having last year as these are set at granddads house after he had to go to a nursing home and mom was trying to get his house ready to sell. These take place when I was 14 years old, about a year before the dreams I was having last year which were set in my parent’s driveway the spring after granddad died. Like the earlier dreams these appear to be a stuck dream that always follows the same chain of events. The dreams I have had so far start with me playing in the backyard of granddads house. The yard looks just like I remember it looking when he had to go to the nursing home. Everything looked really overgrown and unkept rather than perfectly manicured since he had been too sick to keep up with it for a while. Eventually mom walks out of granddads back door and calls for me and tells me I to go ahead an get in granddads reliant. I ask why we are taking the reliant home since I thought Dad was picking us up, and she said he has a meeting and she had been wanting to move the reliant to our house anyway. I asked her how we could all fit in the reliant since she had the back seat loaded full of stuff and she reminded me it could fit 3 in the front seat and told me I was riding in the middle since it was my sister day to choose her seat and she wanted to be by the window. I asked if I could keep playing in the yard until she and my sister were ready to go and she snapped at me that she needed us out of her way for a little while and wanted me in the car NOW. That my sister would be right behind me and I needed to get in first since I was in the middle. As I walk towards the car, mom reminds me to buckle-up. I then walk through the front yead to the tan reliant that was covered in pollen and parked on the street in front of granddads house. I open the passenger side door and the sat down on the tan vinyl bench seat and then close the passenger side door and slide over to the middle seat and fasten the tan lap belt around my waist. As I sit in the car, I noticed that something really sinks but figure it’s either all of the stuff that mom had loaded into the back seat or that the car had been sitting for several weeks. It is really in pleasant waiting in the car, in addition to the unpleasant odor it’s really uncomfortable in the middle because the lap belt was snugly against my hips and my feet were stuck on the bump in the middle and my knees were bumping the a/c controls. I am mad mom is making me ride there since my sister is smaller than me and could get by better with less room. After I had been waiting for a few minutes, my sister is walking down granddads front walk towards the car. She had the same hairstyle I remember her having at that time when she was 10 years old and is always wearing a pink dress and tan sandals she liked to wear back then. She opens the passenger side door and then sits down in the passenger seat then closes the door and buckles her seat belt. It’s even more uncomfortable waiting with her in the car, because her body was now pressed against mine. We then have to spend what seemed like forever in the car waiting for mom to come-out. It seems like we have to wait a lot longer than we did in the dreams I was having last year at it was probably around 45 minutes to possibly an hour and is really unpleasant. While we sit and wait my sister always alternates talking about how bad the car smells and accuses me of tooting; rubbing it in that she got to choose the window seat and I was stuck in the middle; and wanting talk about how she fells about granddad being sick and dying and trying to get me to share my feelings on it. I try to change the subject whenever she talks about granddad, because it was too upsetting for me to think about or discuss but she just keeps bring it up again and again. She also keeps putting her head on my shoulder and smiling in my face while stretching her feet onto the glove box. I am super bored waiting for mom and kept focusing on my sisters sandals being the same color tan as the floor matts and glove box and blending in with them; the reflection of me and my sister on the windshield and passenger side window an how embarrassed it makes me feel that I was so much taller than her yet she is by the window and I am in the middle; and people walking their dogs down the street and hoping none of them saw me and my sister waiting in the car and noticed the embarrassing seating arrangement. Finally, after what seemed like FOREVER, my sister says “I see mommy coming” and then turned my head to see mom locking the front door of granddads house and then walking around the back of the car to put something in the trunk. She closes the truck and then goes to talk to someone across the street from us. Eventually she unlocks the driver side door and then sits down in the driver seat on my left. I feel her body pressed against mine as she put the key in the ignition and then reaches behind me to put her purse in the back seat. I heard the annoying buzzing sound until she closes the driver side door. I felt really squished between my mom and sister with both of them rubbing against me. Mom thens turn the key to start the car but it doesn’t want to start-up and after each failed crank there is the annoying buzzing sound and red lights on the dash. I get really uncomfortable being stuck between my mom and sister while mom keeps trying to start the car and it becomes obvious it is going to take a while. I start asking mom if I can get out. She just ignores me until eventually, she snapps at me and gets in my face and screams at me that I need to calm down; that she is doing the best she could; that if it won’t start it’s not a big deal because dad could pick us up on his way home; and that I WILL stay buckled in my seat until she tells me I can get out. After she turns her attention back to trying to get the car started, she also notices that something really stinks in the car. My sister tells her that I have been pooting and I try to explain that it smelled before I got in. Mom says it smells like poo to her and tells me to check my shoes. I check them and discover I stepped in something. I ask my sister to let me out so I can clean them, but mom gets in my face and yells at me about stepping in poo and tells me to give it to her and she will clean it for me. I try to tell her I would rather get out and clean it myself so she can keep trying to start the car, but she snaps at me again and reminds me she is in charge and that she wants me to stay buckled in my seat. She is in my face telling me I need to calm down and have a better attitude when she gets back to the car as I take off my shoe and give it to her. She then gets out and closes me and my sister back in the car while she disappears back into granddads house with me shoe. As I sit and wait in the car with my sister, she is telling me how gross it is that I stepped in poo and is now just whining about how bad the car smells and asking me why I didn’t check my shoes when I noticed something smelled before she even got it. I have to listen to this until we see mom walking back towards the car. When mom opens the driver side door, she hands me a wet paper towel and tell me to wipe down the bump I had my feet on with it and then hands me my shoe she has cleaned after I give her the paper towel back. She then goes to put the paper towel in granddads trash can while I put my shoe back on. Soon she is opening the driver side door again and then sitting back down in the driver seat. She starts pumping on the accelerator and turning the key. After several more cranks with the car not starting and hearing the annoying buzzing sound and seeing the dash illuminated with red lights, mom is finally able to get the reliant started. My sister immediately leans in front of me to change the radio from an AM news station to her favorite FM station and then turns up the volume and starts singing along to the song on the radio while mom is leaning over me to adjust the rearview mirror and then the passenger side mirror. It is really uncomfortable having them both in my space and it’s annoying having to hear my sister sing along to the radio. Once mom has everything adjusted, she pulls the shift lever to put the car in drive but nothing happens when she presses on the accelerator. She checks to make sure the parking brake is not on and then reaches in front of me and turns of the radio and discovers the car knocked off. She starts trying to turn the key, but nothing happens except the buzzing sound and red lights on the dash. I notice the car is still in park and try to tell mom, but she snaps at me that she is doing the best she can and I need to calm down so she can concentrate on starting the car. After several more cranks, she discovers that the car is out of gear like a tried to tell her earlier. She snaps at me again when I remind her I had tried to tell her earlier. She puts the car back in park and tries to get it started again. This time, the battery sounds weak and after a few cranks, the car just makes a rattling sound and the buzzing and red lights on the dash are fainter than they really are. I reach to undo my seat belt, but mom snaps at me again and tells me that she is going to see if one of granddads neighbors can give us a jump start and says she wants me and my sister to stay buckled in the car. I usually wake up from the dream either arguing with mom about her wanting me to stay buckled in the car of after she has gotten out to look for a jump start. I do not know if she is able to find a jump start or if it works and we are able to drive the reliant home. As these dreams have progressed I seem to be arguing with mom more about her wanting me to sit in the middle, wait in the car, and buckle-up when I get in. When I try to argue with her, she just gets angry and more assertive that she is in control/in charge and that I am to do what she says. So far, my arguing has not worked as mom always makes me go and get in the middle seat and buckle-up. I am also trying to get more assertive about trying to get mom to let me out of the car when she is having trouble starting it, when she discovers I stepped in dog poop, and when the batter dies. However, this just makes her angry and she doubles down on her being in charge and that I am to stay buckled in my seat. In these new dreams, I find riding in the middle much more uncomfortable both physically and emotionally than I did in the dreams I had last winter. In those dreams, it was like I was along for the ride and in these dreams I want to be anywhere other than riding in the middle of the front seat of granddads reliant. I feel physically uncomfortable because of the seatbelt fitting snug on my hips; my feet being stuck on the hump; my knees bumping again the a/c controls; and my sister and then mom being pressed-up against me. I feel emotionally uncomfortable because I find it really embarrassing that I am in the middle riding between my mom and my younger/shorter/smaller sister. It also makes me fell really uncomfortable being squished between them and not having any personal space. If this dream keeps happening, I will try to start journaling changes I notice each time I have it to see if it starts moving in some other direction.
23rd January 2021 Multiple sequences from one dream: Very trippy bit just before waking up. Before that, I am at a building. A utilities company or office building. I am waiting to be seen or talk to someone. There had been a mistake of some kind on a bill, so I got 60 off as a voucher, but the company was cheeky and raised the price anyway in the end, resulting in only 10 off in total. In a larger room, with open plan connections and several large windows, I speak to a woman at a desk. I basically ask her if I can't speak to someone here about retentions; I want to get a better deal. She says no. There's a spray bottle on a table, it has a transparent green-blue liquid and the label has a number on it? I start typing it on my phone's dialler, it takes me a while, it's a long number? Things start to get trippy at this point. For each set of three numbers, there's something that looks like skin showing up on my phone? This image, which is more real than just image, pans from side to side as I go through each set. An eye appears in each equivalent bit for each set I complete. (recall starts becoming vague, two separate sequences blending) Final bit of some sequence, I'm inside a mouth with multiple openings, about seven I think. There's enough standing room and a bit of headroom but not much. The multiple openings open and shut periodically, I think. Sunlight comes through, there's a beautiful blue sky outside. I'm adding missing features to the mouth, like teeth and I reach or am outside to add some sort of ceramic scales to the outer part. It's all a bit jumbled, can only say it was a bit too trippy to recall accurately. Mixing. I'm going to Romania by someone's request. He was organising some kind of "save the world" thing? I remember going about with a group of people, night time but bright? (recall gap) Using a double barrel shotgun of some kind, it doesn't feel as good to use as I'd hoped. It has a locked firing mode that fires each barrel in sequence with a set delay if I press the trigger once. I expected it to fire one of the two barrels only per trigger press. I fight some soldiers with berets. Something reminds me or looks like Promethea. At one point I remember being in a bedroom of some sort. Open sky, no ceiling and not all walls are here. I feel I am stealing or intruding, but it doesn't stop me. I find a box full of mini-discs and floppy disks. Dream: (from falling asleep again in the morning) At one point I'm in my native country. I'm with old schoolmates, like JC, R and some others. It's a very hilly town we're in. There are loads of people about, there's some kind of event going on? Then, I find myself in a shop, deviating from where the group was going, I remember expecting I'd be able to catch up. Some kind of real-time advert is taking place here and it's for olive oil of all things. It almost feels Japanese, the advert. But the olive oil and the general look of the shop make me realise and conclude that I must be in my native country. Pre-lucid thoughts. I see coins in the register being handled, they are not Euros, but they are instead an altered version of the currency my native country had prior to the Euro. I don't question things further despite finding this odd, accepting the context even with some lingering amazement at all this. More walking around the hilly town. Eventually, I'm inside a big building. A theatre or a mix of one and a church or something. Someone mentions pipe organs. I think to myself that if I was wealthy I would buy some to make a car's adornments with. I climb some stairs, I'm with someone up in a gallery. We're talking to another person, but they don't feel like a person? Looks like an old man though. He's some kind of curator and he mentions manipulating pupils (like university students). Me and the other person conspire with eye glances to each other that we're about to kill this old man, who we find to be immoral and tyrannical. When he turns over and is facing a part that has no railing, we both strike him with a large object at the same time, like chairs maybe. The old man falls down, one or two stories. We presume him dead and see some witnesses downstairs are approaching to look and we go down via the stairs. We approach the supposed corpse; he still lives and surprises us with an attack and we become locked in a battle with the old man. The dream becomes a bit supernatural or trippy. The fight follows down a hall that turns into a desert canyon, just before the dream ends.
21st January 2021 Dream: (not the earliest point I can recall in the dream) I'm in a dark and sooty room at the apex of a pyramid. I don't remember seeing the outside, I just have this knowledge intuitively. There's also a bottomless square pit. The soot is dark brown and seems to have an increased build up the further up it is on the inner apex. I don't know how I'm able to see, there's no light source but things look just bright enough. There's some kind of machine near the middle of the room. By the looks of it, it should be fixed down to the ground but it isn't. It has a main moving part, a piston or pushrod of some kind. It jerks around out of control indefinitely. I think something but the recall is gone. The scene changes a bit and a white lady with light curly hair appears? She starts speaking like she's in a documentary, she mentions the machine but then there is a focus on a puppy that appears in the room. The puppy is an integral part of the room, I feel or she explains, and an integral part of whatever purpose the machine is supposed to serve. She explains that someone has to come and feed the puppy every day, but that otherwise it must always remain her. I touch the dog, it's a gold labrador at first? I say something aloud about it being unfair for the dog, or something. (recall gap) In a Japanese town, but it just looks like any town in Britain or the USA, it has more "room" like the latter. I think to myself it's odd that it's a Japanese town. All the people I see around are distant from me and I can't tell what their ethnicity actually is, making me suspect it's not really a Japanese town. But I don't investigate my suspicions further, some kind of dream plot drags me around the town; I'm being chased, or someone else is, and I'm following. A man, he was being chased. We arrive at a house that's also a restaurant or inn. A pub, effectively? There's a flagpole outside on the garden, I notice the ground is covered in snow. For some reason I fear this man is going to defecate on his own snowy lawn. He doesn't. The flag flying on that pole is one like that for India, I notice. Three horizontal stripes, top to bottom; green, white, red or orange. With a stylised black sun in the middle. The man invites me inside. Seemingly the chase is up. (recall gap) I'm shown some kind of machine. H is with me. The man leaves for a while; he said he'd like us to fix this machine for him. It looks like it's bare, i.e. no aesthetic coverings, etc. It has some kind of plastic platters. Looks like many random bits off CD players, tape machines, etc. But the size of the parts is different from what it would be in those machines. H tries to adjust something and the large top platters ping off towards the back left side. We are annoyed, but conclude it probably helps us anyway. (rest of recall is too vague) Notes: - The machine at the pyramid's apex looked like it was some random thing cobbled together from different bits of wood and maybe some metal. It looked very crude and it was equally crude in behaviour. - This pyramid's apex felt almost like the mix between a loft and the inside of a regularly used chimney. -- The room and its contents felt like they had some strong symbolic associations. Could be an interesting place to try doing some dreamwork. - When I questioned the town's Japanese-ness, my awareness of the dream overall increased but I was instinctively taken by the dream plot before I could really think about it further. I realise now I could have thought about it further while running but I didn't.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP Julian Assange and Keanu Reeves somehow end up at my farm and we try to work together on a project. There are some German people nearby camping behind some bushes and we talk about their possible intentions and if I should fear them or not. At some point Keanu needs to go and I take him to the subway. For some reason we pretend not to know each other. Someone recognizes him. We depart ways and I join my mother at some other train. At some shop with newspapers, I start reading one and ask the cashier how much it is. It ain't cheap and I wonder if it's better to subscribe online version, so I don't buy it. I still had the chance to read a horrible story in it about some people who had killed a rabbit with a stick in the middle of a town. It was news because it was gore and unexpected. I feel so sorry for the rabbit and I am taken to the moment it happened. I see some men beating the poor rabbit with sticks and I interrupt them. Give time for the rabbit to run. I go after the animal because he is hurt, but he disappears in the crowd downtown. I then realize I am in Lisbon. I meet some people I know and walk with them a bit, but they end up in a jewellery shop to buy some gift to some friend and I get bored and leave. I see a lady with a kid, trying to get eggs from a chicken coop at the local parish. Some eggs are out of reach so I offer to help and I walk them home afterwards. They live in a small appartment in a building she says is full of drug addicts. But I think her place is nice, just very empty. She only has a bed. I then meet her husband, a tall handsome man and apparently he likes me to. After spending a day with them, it's time to depart and we hug. My hug with him lasts too long, I am getting horny and I feel his boner. We forget his wife is watching until she makes some uncomfortable comment. I just leave.
20th January 2021 Fragment: I am at a house much like H's old home. I am playing with W, the cat? He wants to go out but I want to touch his fluffy fur and eventually I do open a back door to the house and let him out. He hesitates and I prod him sort of gently with my boot. It's sunny outside. The grass is what I can only describe as a perfect colour and the back garden slopes uphill. I see someone arriving in a silver car, a woman. I look down but pretend I didn't see her arrive as I close the back door. She knocks and I reluctantly (?) answer. I have this feeling she just wants to sell something or whatever. Rest of recall is too fuzzy. But at least two or three separate instances of talking to people or answering the door where they aren't wearing a mask, and neither am I. On each encounter, there's a weird physical tangle, as if they fall forwards onto me, like they've tripped on something and on some level, all of this puts me on edge. One of those other instances takes place at our current home. Outside looks different but I can't quite place it anymore. It's also day time. A delivery from a truck or lorry? Interactions/dialogue with H at some point.
#548 DILD 4:10AM I am in Texas at the old place I lived in when dad was pastor at that church. The church looked different; more like a metal building than anything. Some reason I am sleeping on the ground next to it. I kept looking at how the bottom of the wall was just a 2x4 laying flat on the ground. I kept thinking that's not going to last. Next thing I know I am walking around in a version of the house my wife bought before we got married. I notice that my feet are not hitting the floor. I start focusing on that and quickly realize I can make myself levitate. I am so excited. I gradually gain control of it more and more start quickly floating from room to room. I show off to my wife and son. My son is excited about it but I my wife is it like "That's cool. I'm going to the store." I spend some time floating around and over my son. He's enjoying and playing with me. I follow my wife outside talking about how I now have a superhero power and start thinking how this will change everything. Then it dawns on me this might just be a dream. I do a nose plug and blow through. I am actually disappointed at this point. I stop levitating and walk back in the house. My mom's sister and her husband pull up in the drive way. I am surprised to see them. Uncle keeps complaining about some guy on the highway during their drive. I'm not sure exactly what he's going on about but he keeps calling the guy a "stupid fucker". This is so out of character for him that I start laughing. We walk inside. And I start preparing food at the stove. Everything is so extremely vivid and lifelike that I do another RC. This time I poke my right finger into my left palm. For some reason there is a pill bottle on my finger for a fraction of a second. I note how odd it was but decide to try again. This time my finger morphs all the way through. There is a strange sensation in my hand and I see my finger coming out the back. Really weird. I look back at my uncle who has been watching with disinterest. Now that my attention is back on him, he immediately goes back to calling that guy a stupid fucker. The way he keeps saying it just weird and goofy. I mock him, repeating how he's saying it, and begin laughing again. Finally, just to get him to stop saying that, I ask him what the guy did that was so bad. At that moment I have a dream-shattering thought. Maybe too much awareness? I know that his response will make no sense because nothing really happened. I quickly force that idea away and listen. Uncle says "Weeeell... It's because he..." The dream fades. That thought, still lingering, did me in. Maybe it's for the best since my recall has been shit lately. I wake up.
I'm walking on a big sea with Albin. I don't know if anyone told me but I'm a dragon too. There are some red lightnings and mini thunder storms over the water. I tell Albin that I get a bad feeling from the red lightnings as I fly up in the air, inspecting the lightnings from above. Albin tells me that I need to cross the red lightnings in order to enjoy life. There is a door to a big room with some red lightnings in front of it. Albin invites me but I don't want to go in because of the red lightnings. I decide to go in anyway after some time. There are a bunch of people in there that are dancing traditional fast paced pair dances. I join a girl in my age with dark hair. We dance some kind of dance where you touch hands in the air above your heads and take big steps to the sides, almost jumping. I really enjoy myself. I fly to the roof as the dream transitions to some kind of game where I see different characters' portraits. I see a dragon man that I apparently have a 73 % win rate with. I'm at some kind of party with my cousins and big family. I am able to fly but only really bad. I see some helium balloons against the roof and figure that if I use them I will be able to fly better. When I take them down they drop down as if they never had helium in them. I talk with Elina and she tries to find a book that she can rip apart in order to give me some wings that I can use to fly better. She finds a book about horses that she wants to rip apart. I ask her if it doesn't belong to anyone. Sara comes in and apparently it's hers. I tell Elina that we can't destroy it. I fly away but not that good. There is some kind of discus competition where people throw things with style in order to collect points.
Yet another dream where I seen to be stuck in my childhood, even in my childhood home. I still can't understand why I don't have dreams about the beautiful new condo I just moved into. Dad enrolls my younger sister in an after-school program and wants me to take her there. I drive there ahead of time to scope it out, and it turns out to be a day care for kids too young for kindergarten! (For context, my "baby" sister turns 40 this year.) I go home… to my childhood home, that is, and try to explain to Dad why this nursery school is all wrong. I'm standing in the garage, looking out at a snow-covered driveway. I walk out to the driveway and there's a car parked there, but it's not my car. I look back into the two-car garage, where my car appears to be wedged between another car and the garage wall at a 45˚ angle. It can't be car, can it? It's not driveable at the angle. Maybe I left the car at the nursery school. I try to get someone to take me there to look for the car.
I'm in some sort of training centre. I play some racket sport that is similar to tennis and squash. Every time I try to hit the ball I'm worthless. I have almost no power and no accuracy. I played against Gabriel but I go to the bench instead. Albin and André is there. New fragment. I'm in a car with Gabriel. My sister is there and she talks about some kind of roleplaying game and I wish that I could have a better guide. We drop Gabriel off but notice that he forgot his phone in the car. I take it up and inspect it. It is white and the front screen is in good shape and clean. The back is really dirty and worn out. The phone is half touch and half buttons. When I click on the button in the top right corner the password is shown. My sister gasps out loud because she is disappointed in Gabriel's security. New fragment. I'm in our inner yard and about to walk in. I feel a bit off and wonder if it is a dream. I do my RC but it doesn't work at first. I think about how I came here and figure out that I don't remember how I ended up here. I try to lift off and fly away but I can't. I try to climb the big door to the outside but do not succeed at first. I am able to climb it the third time. I am about to jump in order to fly away but the door falls apart and I fall to the ground before lift off. I start to walk to the left and see some people. I see Sweden's king Carl XVI Gustaf walking past a corner. I get a bad feeling and walk a bit faster. I see Ed and he is avoiding me. The king is getting close up on me and I am getting more scared. I start to run and I am able to fly away this time. It's not pleasant since I am flying for my life. Ed comes back to me and I feel his bad intentions. He tells me to follow him. We are closing up on our destination and I hear someone scream. I think that It is a copy of myself that is screaming. When I finally see the scene I'm terrified and start to scream and cry. I see myself holding in a blood covered saw against a copy of a defenseless Ed kneeling down in front of the copy of me and holding his arms against the copy of me, trying to protect himself.
I’m in a green hilly area dotted with groves of trees, alongside a group of people. It seems like we’re all traveling somewhere together and have been in this general area for several days. Nearby is an enormous skeleton horse with leathery wings. I think it’s cute and have been making friends with it. (My waking-life sense of what is cute is pretty broad by most people’s standards, and it seems to be even broader in dreams.) The horse is really enormous: it has its head down at my level, and it would probably be big enough to inhale me if it breathed (which seems unlikely to happen). Now it wants to give me a ride: it lies down, leaning to one side so I can get on. I seat myself in the ridge between two of its vertebrae. This part of it, like the wings but unlike the head and neck, is still covered in skin, which is dry and stiff, rather like a drum skin in feel and color. It takes off, and we fly around the area for a little while. When it lands again and lets me down, I rejoin the group, which has been occupied with something else up until now. Before long, though, as we leave the area on the next phase of the journey, I take to the air again, on my own this time. I have one eye on the rest of the group and the other on the road ahead as they walk towards a pass through taller hills. 28.12.20 [I’ve been meaning to post this for a while….]
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