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Earlier before the dream I in waking life I was talking to a friend about pizza. Then it was about 1am and I woke up from a dream and I'm pretty sure it was what had happened earlier in the night... I think I was lucid for what seemed a few moments but got excited and woke up...

Copied from Workbook
Date: 12/07/2013
Method: MILD & WBTB (anticipating a WILD)
Total sleep time: 6-7

So close...

I was dreaming that I was sitting in my front yard...it was snowing (should have become lucid because if it snows where I live...the world must be coming to an end). I look up in the sky and i thought I saw a reindeer . Turns out it was not a reindeer but a camel and I thought to myself, "Whew, for a minute there I thought I was going crazy." I know...Stupidest ways I missed becoming lucid...again. To add insult to injury, then airplanes and helicopters started falling out of the sky and crashing in my front yard .

helen it's time to die

15 years of age with long black hair
living in a mansion, mother's dead. and her mother too.
there's so many little doors but when I touch their handles
dead voices scream in my ear dont be opened!
like alice in wonderland
alice with knives
voices start screaming in my ear
helen, it's time to die!
I don't know where the voices are coming from
maybe, the little doors will hold the answer
I open the door and walk down the stairs
it's flooded, I dive beneath the water
into endless hallways of black cats
I come to a room
where the dead are having dinner
my grandmother, a shriveled black skull
the dead tell me
helen, it's time to die!
we are starting a revolution
where the dead will rise
an army
playing cards blow around our table
spades hearts clubs diamonds
I see visions of their suicides
blood
we need a virgin

12/06/13 I am not sure if this would be WILD or DILD, probably needs its own class. I had done a WILD, then the dream faded and I floated in and out of various states of sleep verging on unawareness. Then a new dream formed. I was lucid more or less right away.

I was standing across from a beach in Maui. I walked over to the little park above the beach and could see people sitting on the grass and that the ocean was going totally wild. Crazy waves were slamming into the land from various directions. A voice from the life gaurd shack was projected by a bul horn. It was a female, "If anyone goes any where near the water, I will close the park immediatly!"

I figured I would sit and watch the waves, so I sat on the grass near a tree. I noticed the grass was soaking wet. In fact it seemed porous and like it was leakig artisean sea water. Cock roaches were coming out of burrows and so were worms and such. I felt like making the dream stop this as it was just nasty, but decided not to be to controlling. Well I certainlty did not want to keep sitting there anyways. I stood up and noticed some kind of critter in a crevice. I figured it was some orm of crab. I focused on it nad it slowly gained detail. It was some sci-fi spider about the size of a softball. I could see its mouth and judged it could fit my thumb in its mouth. I said out loud to no one in paticular, "look at this spider, it could bite off a finger."

DCs gathered around and started poking at it. They asked if it was dangerous, and it would charge out at them as they jumped back. the life guard on the bull horn called out "of course it is, leave it alone!" Now there were about 3 spiders making charges in and out of the crevice. I decided to get into the tree to watch. I was now in the tree. I decided to leave this scene as it just staye about the same, so I swung out of the tree and leaped to the side walk.

I walked down the road a bit and came to a building. I decided to climb ithe building, but to do it like rock climbing instead of spider climbing. I suppose I cheated, because I just morphed the surface as needed to get good hand holds. I was suddenly on the other side of the building, but it did not seem weird. I reached a roof and then climbed higher to a flat roof. i could see the beach.

At this point my first alarm went off and I began some DEILD attempts.

i was sitting at the old rugby fields and there were miles and miles of grass in every direction. in the sky blue as can be…a huge killer whale kite floated through the sky. it made me laugh and i had a strange feeling id seen this whale once before.

the littler girl flying the gigantic mammal, decided to take it up a notch, and flew very close to me. suddenly, the killer whale went into hyper killer whale mode, and zoomed past me at over 100 mph. i was like holy fuck!!! i started clapping


on a side note.. earlier in the dream i threatened to beat the shit out of an old man on a golf course…but then his clubs ran away from him on his calf cart and i started to feel bad… so i chased down his cart and drove it back to him. then i almost got hit by 3 trains driving on the golf course. i told the third once "watch out!" then the conductor came to a screeching halt. i felt bad i had spoken so harsh

12/06/13 I woke in the hotel after 7 hours sleep and decided to do a real WILD. I focused on one of the advanced tasks repeating "I am the wolf" while visualizing transformation into a wolf. I got into the first stage of sleep and ran around as a wolf, but it was still just flashes of HH. Not very vivid. I kept imagining my arms transforming and so on, then I tookoff running. I was only getting whispy visuals and could not really feel the snow, except that it made me kind of slide on the turns. After I was feeling like a wolf and seeing flashes of myself as a wolf, I took off after a rabbit, but never caught it. I suppose the sleep cycle switched to REM, because suddenly I was standing in the condo we had just been in for vacation. I totally forgot about the wolf thing and had not actually caught the rabbit. I leave it up to Ophelia if that counts for anything. It was not bad, but I can do better.
I was now thinking about closing my eyes. I tried it, but could still see everything just fine. Hmmm, I felt as if my eyes were closed. I decided to look in a mirror. I found one on the wall ( actually a pillar) and could see myself. I closed them again. The me in the mirror close its eyes. It felt like my eyes were closed but I could still see. I decided to try and convince myself by play acting. This was Hawaii so I needed sunscreen, right? OK, you never spray it in your eyes. I now had a can of sprayon sunscreen. I looked in the mirror and closed my eyes. The image closed its, but I could still see. I covered my closed eyes with two fingers and started spraying. My eyes felt closed and the images eyes were covered by fingers. I could feel the sunscreen spray onto my face and hand, yet I was also watching all of this in the mirror. Very curious. I would call it a success as I do not think the task required I be blinded by the action. At this point the dream faded. I floated in HI and came in and out of awareness until another dream formed.

MacGyver and the atomic bomb
I'm watching MacGyver. He and the guy he's helping have been brought into the villain's inner sanctum. The villain, a Russian, says he knows that MacGyver came to find out what he has, but he'll never reveal the secret. Mac tells his companion that in exchange for a couple thousand dollars he can get whatever it is. The villain then reveals that it's an atomic bomb. Mac starts to repeat his line about getting it for a couple thousand, but is stopped when one of the henchmen intentionally starts the detonation sequence. I see it from the perspective of a camera inside the bomb (which is itself mounted into the wall, like a safe), pointing out into the room. There's a bunch of loops of thin glass pipes inside the bomb along with a small hammer. The pipes are nested: very thin pipes running inside wider pipes with a small gap between the pipe walls. When a man dressed in a white bunny suit (no helmet) runs a paint roller down the glass face of the bomb, it seems to remove a protective coating, and his face melts off (picture the last scene of Lost Ark). Mac and his companion each jump to the side to avoid the lethal radiation spewing out of the bomb. The bomb detects the intrusion attempt and automatically causes the hammer to fall, shattering the glass tubes carrying the radioactive gasses.

Now I'm seeing a documentary about the construction of the bomb, talking about the pipes. Graphics are showing the multiple sections of inner pipe (given a fancy name), surrounded by the outer containment pipe. The inner pipe is specially designed to vanish if many standard techniques are used to get into it. The video shows a man passing <something> near the pipes; as he does so, the inner pipes just seem to phase out of existence. The graphic now show the outer containment pipe. The voice-over says that a series of detectors can tell exactly where a breach in the <inner> pipe occurs, and that if there's an inner breach, then the hammer falls to shatter the whole thing.

The documentary now moves on to discuss the effects of having the gas released. The camera's viewpoint is moving quickly through the underground hallways, coming to rest in a room with a security arch and conveyor belt (like at an airport). The video shows the gas entering the security hardware and ... something.


Fragments
I had a dream involving the security arch and conveyor belt earlier in the night, but I don't remember it.

1.) Molly and Stephanie approached Emily and I, and as they were walking up to us I was worried that Emily would think they were weird. Emily had a book in her hands and was leafing through the pages as the four of us discussed it.

2.) I was at Disneyland, or some kind of amusement park. There were a bunch of shows going on, like plays and parades and whatnot. I kept walking across the area where the shows were taking place and people would get mad at me for interfering with it. Then I remember being Legolas from Lord of the Rings, I think I was supposed to be in one of the shows now. I tried to jump onto a horse, but it kept passing out and falling over.

So last night - I didn´t plan a WILD up front - I slept from early morning to afternoon today.
But when I woke up quite nice and naturally - I thought, why not go back to sleep with SSILD.
I did and I had a dream - but only after one more awakening and some mantras came the dream, where there was a bit of lucidity.
Not at all like 2 nights back - where I fell asleep and instantly was fully lucid at such a point.

I was dreaming of meeting a frustrated woman, who got abandoned by her taxi-driver on a little road going through woods and little valleys - vaguely like one I know, which does not get anywhere bigger for a while.
There was a guy, telling her, this would be typical - the driver would have seen, that he would have to drive back all this way for free, if he took her to that far-off place she wanted to.

There had been a huge storm before and I saw one enormous tree lying right over the road, on which I looked a bit from above in the same road.

So - I saw a tree from a weird perspective - and this told me somehow, that I can make huge leaps.
Which I did - towards it - and by that moment came the realization, that what I do is quite like flying in a dream.
But my instant first judgement was - naa - this must be reality!
But I looked at my hands - they were a bit out of focus - but had 5 fingers and the thumb didn´t go through.
But anyway - the leaping and bounding did register and I did then know it was a dream, even if I had no real grasp of it.
So I went on looking at my hands and testing their impenetrability - but what resulted was me hovering somewhere and loosing sight - almost completely.
Not being equipped this time with a comparably good daytime-memory - I did not try to otherwise systematically stabilize - what I did towards the end was shout "more lucidity" when the visuals were almost completely gone.
They were perfectly vivid and beautiful when I started wondering if it was a dream.
I think, I lost lucidity without waking up and continued this dream - not 100% sure, though.

So - the full-on WILD activities do incubate me with a great level of lucidity from the onset of DILD - while this one instance was a real DILD - and not a glorious one at that.


I wonder one thing - maybe the auto-hover mechanism is easier to throw up for my inner simulation-centre than feeling the soles of my feet with every step..?

I will edit in a bit more ND later - but nothing really note-worthy concerning there.

Except a non-lucid present - and many recurring themes - having to clear out of a flat with renovating packing up and sorting stuff.
Looking for a new place - and in this case I was with a friend out and about Berlin - looking for a place to squat.
It was summer, and there was a place, which supposedly I knew about in that dream - a ruin, with some structures still quite intact.
So we came there - somebody had put up a big rake in the smallish access to that spot - we circumvented it - and there was this place - and further on a little bridge, with a guy behaving like some sort of guard - but my friend went to him, and convinced him, that it was okay, I take over the place.

But to make it more complicated concerning sorting out and removals - once I had some of my things over - the ex-squatter of the place re-appeard.
A guy I know in real live, and who did really squat in several ruins in Berlin some years ago.
And then it was him demanding his stuff back - which then was suddenly there - and all mixed up - his, mine, rubbish - almost no light and space and some hick-hack as well.

But I asked him for a present - having incubated this activity with mantras and visualization for the TOTM.
And he gave me a beautiful soap-stone sculpture.

It was shaped like a slice of a melon with almost all fruit-flesh eaten away as a base.
Like if you had a ball, and would draw two circles on it with the maximum radius the ball allows for - they intersect and result in 4 such slices then.
Inlaid into the base was a little depression for a small soap-stone-ball to hover and rotate freely in.
And in this ball, a light was set in - and you could set the direction of lightning with slightly turning it.

Whatever - I liked it a lot and thanked him.


Another dream had me win a contest to get invited to take part in a huge stage production.
But somehow, I was too late and witnessed, how another girl (I was around 20 maybe..) got dressed and made up for the show.
I hurried up and arrived there with a friend - and we talked the guy, with whom the plans had been made in the first place, into taking in both of us. Which was nice.
But there was some animated argumentation involved - and this other girl was almost in tears upon seeing me arrive.

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #170: Spellcasting 101

I'm standing in what looks like a hotel room with a spellcaster, a brown-haired girl in her late teens or early twenties. She's holding her palms out in front of her, and a miniature tornado whirls and dances in each of her hands. Each cyclone is about a foot high and spins rapidly but quietly, the tip of the funnel stuck to the same spot on her palms. This trick is new to her and she darts her eyes at me as if to say, "Did I get it right?" I nod approvingly.

For some reason, a flame catches around the upper rim of each tornado and she starts to lose her calm. "Why's it doing that?" The flame begins to spread down the funnel and she starts to panic. I become lucid as the fire spreads down the tornado and wraps ribbons of flame around her arms. I can see that the flames are just wrapping around her, though, and she's not actually catching on fire. It looks like some kind of fire spell is building up that she doesn't understand how to operate or control.

There's a door just behind me that looks like it leads down to a basement. I usher her toward the basement, saying, "Let's go downstairs to practice that. It'll be safer there." She's starting to panic but she starts moving toward the basement as the dream ends.

I hold on for DEILD, imagining myself running down a dark flight of stairs. It takes a moment for the imagery to coalesce again, and when I emerge back in a dream, I'm alone in a different hotel room, running around the room. I'm sort of prancing around on the carpet using just the balls of my feet. It's very dainty-looking and super un-macho but the sensation on my feet's very vivid and is helping me keep fears of an unstable dream at bay. (I know to ignore these, but there they were anyway!)

I run around the room like this for a bit more and then switch to rubbing my hands together. I continue this pretty much throughout the rest of the dream.

I walk out through the hotel room door into a darkly-carpeted hallway and walk for a long way. On my right I see a door that looks just like the one that led to the basement in the previous dream, so I follow it, expecting to find the young spellcaster again. I tromp down a flight of wooden stairs into a well-lit anteroom where an Hispanic woman in her late 30s is sitting behind an old-style cash register. She gives me a friendly smile and I remember the Task of the month to ask a DC for a gift.

"Hey!" I say. "Go ahead and give me my gift now." She nods, reaches under her desk, and pulls out a greeting card in an envelope. I will the greeting card to be open and the envelope just sort of vanishes. The cover of the card is some kind of abstract painting and the inside just has some simple handwriting in pen that read: "THANK YOU FOR THE CARD!" I'm trying to process what this means when the dream ends.

I was watching porn or was about to. My door flew open and I thought, "Oh, shit! I'm in for it." I woke up and my heart was beating furiously. Strange how that happens.

This was a long and choppy one. So, took place in a few different settings, and I remember the mansion.

It was an adventure, alright. The main two villains were having sex, adn we were sneaking around in the mansion. Another thing took place in a warehouse, CHR.N was there. I think it was tied to the video game dream, where Kirby was the main character. I had to dodge around an enemy, which chased me in a corn field.

The mansion was big. It was loosely based on my Mom's boss' house.

Well, the first thing I remember was what I thought was my uncle. (he was my dads friend (My dad is now dead, so I never see that person anymore.) and was a friend to the family.) He was very tall(too tall) and looked extremely like him. We decided to show him around... or town or bunker. We had lived underground, but there were buildings and such. While my brothers, sister (perhaps my mom) were showing him around, I was going to a living room, watching TV. Closing and locking the slide doors on both sides. We had pinball games and more. I felt so relieved, safe and relaxed. But then, somehow things went bad. I believe my "uncle" was actually a zombie. (Aha, I view zombies different.) I think we killed him or sorts. Suddenly, zombies came from everywhere. Now, I was in the middle of the "small town" (which had 4-5 brown buildings.) and we were getting packed and some already in the car to get out. I was getting a couple things packed. Included, my inventory I sell IRL and a cup of ice from a local gasstation IRL. (How did I not become lucid or RC... >.<) Well my sister was getting some more stuff, she waited too long and got bitten. We could see her start lighting a cigar while transforming. (From Walking Dead or something I believe.) While my mom was screaming and crying, my brothers in the front pushed the pedal. We raced, zombies everywhere. Suddenly, I saw other cars. We were saved! Nope. My brother screamed "Now they're getting smart!" Because, somehow, I don't know how, or why, they were zombies. Tons of cars of them trying to be humans. My brother, somehow an amazing racer, raced past them, and we made it out to the light and they were losing where we were. We got to a cliff and a sunset, and my brother said "It must be time for the next game. I remember this." Then he sped, we flew out of the car, as if it was an epilogue or something before a new videogame release. I just remember my brother, I, and a girl flying out. But my mom doesn't come into play with the rest of the story, so we'll just say My brothers and I. (Two brothers.).
So, after the video game credits (not really.) we landing infront of a building. (This is where it becomes foggy.) People started to come, and before we knew it we had to go for a hunt of food with them. We went to a nightmare hell instead that looked like a grocery store. At first I remember, my brother going on a secret side door because he thought they were doing evil things! Nope, they werent. Then, we were collecting food, I remember I got a lot of grains and oats for survivial and then we had to continue on. Then, it was hell. There were tags that if we read it would happen. I read "your worst nightmare will come." and spiders, evil clowns (miniature, size of like toys) Came at me from everywhere. (Our team was split up be now.) so I imagined they couldn't walk, and it happened. (Nope, wasn'[t lucid. FFS.) I found that tag from going up the stairs so I decided not to be an idiot and continue up. I went back to some of the team and the leader, we had a mini attack I believe, and I asked the leader where my brothers were. He answered with this... "(my brother's gamertag for xbox) got eaten by the cookie monster, and (my other brother' gamertag)" ... to be honest, I forgot :/. I think it said he logged off or died. Ahaha. Well that's it. I logged off the game, and woke up.

I notice that water has pooled in the doorway into my bedroom. I look up to see that where the top piece of the door jam should be, there's instead a slot about an inch wide cut into the top of the door frame. It's filled with grey open-cell foam that's soaked full of water. The water is slowly dripping out of the door frame onto the floor. Now I have collected a bucket and two plastic trash cans to catch the water while I decide what to do. Together they aren't wide enough to span the entire doorway, so some parts of the floor are still getting wet. I decide to use some duct tape to tape two dust collection funnels over the crack in the top of the doorway to redirect water that would have fallen on the floor into one of the trash cans instead.

I dreamed that due to budget cuts two people I deal with the most at another organization were to be laid off. I asked in vain for the name of the guy who was calling on the phone to announce this, so I had to hand the phone to my boss before finding out who was calling. After the call my boss was surprised to hear that I actually work with these guys every day because he only occasionally does. Then I suggested whether we could hire them, but no budget. I had been a bit worried that if hired I would be demoted because they are more qualified than me, but I thought it would be in best interest of our project. Thus I was both disappointed and relieved by the lack of budget. I already thought this was a lost cause when I heard that one of them was challenging the CEO or director or whatever her title was for the control of the entire organization now. Informally I wished him well, though I did not not whether he was qualitified for that position, formally our organization had to appear impartial because we would have to work with whoever won the conflict.