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The only thing i remeber is that I was lucid, no other fragments or stuff,
because I needed one night to fully sleep through, I feel kinda sick right now.

So that's it...

My mother is haunting me - actually those dreams were among the rare dreams I was able to sometimes remember in their entirety, before starting journalling on here.
Again - I spare you - nasty stuff anyway almost always..

Our old house again - but somebody rented the bungalow, which was next to it and also ours.
My grandmother suspected this man of having buried a dead body in the garden - but there was none in the end.
But I used to have - I think several - dreams, where there was one.
Buried by me and my grandmother - only her, only me - don´t know what that is all about.

In this dream there was also a tooth scene - which is supposedly quite common - can´t remember having had any before.
One was missing - and the two front teeth moved apart from each other - and there was a gap I hated the looks of. But there is something real-life connected - some tooth got inflammation around the roots - after a mistake of another dentist - so it needs to be repaired with a pivot tooth - that was quite recently..

Another scene, which is very vividly there is me and my boyfriend putting shale-shingles into my window from the outside to fill and "insulate" it.
That making no sense - we could have just as well closed the whole window with bricks.
But somehow, a bit of air circulation and not darkening the room completely was important for some reason.


Another dream had me at school - I had missed some lessons about something really complicated - maths in a way - or physics - lots of equations making no sense to me.
A friend of mine did help me catch up at home - and I had done a lot of work - and actually started understanding the matter.
I had written some several pages of equations and some text - and I wanted to show this to an angry teacher getting at me, for having missed the whole topic.

When I took out my notes and he went through them - he came across two or three pornographic drawing of my boyfriend.
I never tried myself at portraits - and esp. not of such ones in real life by the way..
He totally flipped out and shouted at me - thinking, I had mixed these in on purpose.
Then a pack of cigarettes fell out of my school-bag, and I had a hell of a stress, to get it back without him seeing it.
That at least worked out - but he was in a flying rage anyway.

And - curiously I have a new dream-sign - somebody singing!!
Me again with my normal voice - but I forgot what, when, why and the melody, too.

I didn't try to consciously lucid dream, but I guess my DILD's had a different plan.

Uno:

My face was cold, and then the rest of me started freezing. I just sorta looked around for a minute before realizing there was only one thing standing in the dank, stone room. A tall mirror stood in the middle with inscriptions on the top gild of the mirror. All you Potter-heads know EXACTLY what I'm talking about by now(Erised). I was haaaapppeh. This was a good dream line and I knew I was sick so should probably stop dreaming, but I ran up to it anyhow. The entire mirror was covered in thick, black dust. That's fine, I'll just wipe it off, right? Wrong. I stood there for a couple dream minutes, polishing it with my sleeve, but it didn't do jack. For a moment, I almost got mad, but it took a while before I realized it didn't really bother me.
My dream looses focus and I wake up. I blame cold medicine.

Dos:

I'm freezing on a rock's ledge far above the ground. My dream created bitter cold wind biting into my skin, but I think I should just sleep with more blankets at this point. Anyhow, I'm closer to the base of the mountain, thankfully, but there's this dude at the very edge of the ledge. At this point, I'm kinda curious who he is, kinda curious how long it'll take for the cold wind to become warm, but I know exactly who he is when he turns around. There's a long scar down his left eye and cheek over what I said would be fine features. His hair's dark and his eyes are silver, but he still has the mouthful of canine teeth that I created. He's one of the characters from my stories.
Dream ends. I just go immediately back to sleep which may have caused the DEILD dream next.

Tres:

My dream plopped me squarely (rectangely? I mean, the Hallway's not a square.) in the Hallway. I immediately swaggered over to the first door and opened it without really caring. Two small candles resting on great metal bars stood before a giant tapestry that I fuzzily remember dragons and fire being embroidered on with incredible number.
I just stood there for a moment, watching everything. Chills started to work their way up my spine and I suddenly got this sense of foreboding and anxiety that knocked me on my dream ass. Just as I was about to shut the door (Common sense! Yay!) I noticed there was book sitting on the ground between the medieval lamps. As I started to move closer to the book my dream faded off.
Such good timing. I don't remember waking up, I just sort of floated into the next dream, I think.

Cuatro:

I'm standing in a giant tower. The sky's a raging black and the ground is rougher than obsidian. Even the cool grey stone bricks of the tower are dark in the lighting, and the sounds of war ring out below me. A huge army is amassing at the base of the tower, stretching out over miles. They certainly look, let alone sound, intimidating, but I wasn't even close to being scared. That's when I realized they were MY ARMY! I started my little victory dance: The electric slide coupled with the Thriller in an amazing moonwalk montage that features the Worm and some very awkward break-dancing, but then my dream faded as I woke up coughing my lungs up.

Seis:

Musical instruments line the walls of a small room with no doors. No doors is never a good sign. I was still grooving with it, though. A clock was mounted over the only clear area in the entire area, but I didn't take much notice of it. The hands were pointed at 0...Couldn't be a very effective clock. A sound erupted from a cello at the other side of the room. If you didn't know, cellos tend to sound VERY NICE. This one resembled a person ripping a poor wittle squirrel's teeth out more than a musical. The other instruments began to join in: Ukuleles, pianos, guitars, flutes, trumpets, tubas, violins, drums, triangles, clarinets and far too many more made a horrible ratcheting sound in their complete discordance.
I really didn't like that clock. The hands began to move as the sound rose in intensity, and between my shoving fingers in my ears, I reached up for it. It took a minute for me to grab it, even though I didn't grow, and I smashed it against the ground. The sound faded until a piano was left playing Hallelujah in Jeff Buckley's fashion.
Dream faded.

Siete:

I'm sitting at a desk. There's no walls and no floor. I'm just there with my chair at an empty desk. Simultaneously, a sign and single white pen appears on the desk.
"Write "dead" on your desk."
My first reaction is like: What could it hurt?
My second reaction is: No. For those who don't know, white is considered all the colors of, at least, our visible spectrum. Equipped with this dream knowledge, I slipped off my chair, and started to draw the grooves in a wood floor. I gently blew on the white lines I drew into the black, and a three dimensional groove appeared in dark wood. The sign yelled at me. "Deviant. Write "dead" on your desk."
I didn't really care, to be honest. This was too awesome. I kept drawing the one plank until I came to spot where I thought a wall might look nice and just drew straight up into nothing. A dry-wall appeared as I breathed on it again, and I quickly formed a pale blue plaster with dark bronze patterns at the edges.
The sign yelled again. "Deviant. Write "dead" on your desk. Complete your reconstruction."
I didn't stop. I'm a bad deviant. After a while, I finished the outline of a small room. The sign kept yelling at me, repeating the last line over and over again. Out of pure instinct, I drew a small window across the room and filled it in with my white. Another person on the other side blew on it, and light flooded in from outside. The sign yelled again, as the light hit it and the desk before fading completely away.
I liked that dream. I really did. And then I woke up and wished I had a white pen to draw my cold away.

Ocho:

Two swords rang out against each other, clashing in darkness. A figure of a person I knew and definitively hated swung his sword again, to my parry. I'm sure my blow-by-blow report of an evenly-matched fight would bore you, so I'll skip that and get to the point: We were evenly matched just as we always would be.
Dream faded into Nueve.

Nueve:

While the other dreams had been longer in nature, this was short and sweet.
A lady treading on nothing in a white sky that glittered silver and sparkled without light stood before me. She was elegant and strong, beautiful without anything one might consider beautiful.
"You are brave. Stay with your bravery until the end."
I wanted to ask her a question, and I felt it rising in my throat as I woke up in a cold sweat.

First I remember being in a bad neighborhood and I remember a bunch of creepy looking birds staring at me. They were pretty big in size. Then it's like they all turned away and started feeding or something... Can't remember that much of this one...

Second it was like I was playing an RPG or I was an rpg player. The character was on a horse and also later flying on a dinosaur like
tyrranosaurus Rex... I also remember the character going around another character kinda bowing possibly doing healing potions or something...

My husband was about to throw away a box of chocolates my mom brought. "No, these chocolates are my favorites!" I objected and stopped him.

DC woman: You won't believe what pet we got our daughter?

She was going to say a goat - I just knew it, but she did not get to say it because someone else guessed "A fish?"

"No, how could it be a fish? We keep it in our front yard. Actually we did have a fish, but it was sad, it was a matter of time: when we got it, we kept it in our front yard in warm weather, and all was well, but then it got cold, and the fish died. My daughter was devastated?"

I suggested "Why not move the fish inside for the winter?"

DC woman was shocked, hadn't thought of it before. All of a sudden the fish was not dead after all, and DC woman was able to move it inside for the winter based on my recommendation.

There was no more mention of getting a goat as a pet. I assume no longer needed since fish survived.

Once again I went to bed late and had get up early. I recall fragments of 2 dreams, but they were not intersesting... I missed my dream sigh tho... Sad day.

And once again I didn't wake properly from my alarm clock, because of the wrong settings... I'll do I properly tomorrow night. I'll set the alarm cock right, spot my dream sign, and do DEILD attempts at least 4-5 times. And go to bed earlier!!!!

BLACK: Regular
BLUE: Dream
RED: Notes
PURPLE: Quote (specific words I remember clearly)
__________________________________________________ ____________________________
I'm not quite sure how this dream started or ended.
Date: November 30th, 2013
__________________________________________________ ____________________________
I was in a hospital [ it looked like one I'd been in before ]. It was quiet, which made me feel very uncomfortable. It didn't seem right. A man [ He appeared to be in his early/mid 20's and had brown hair, young face, was tall, thin, and had dark eyes. He seemed very familiar ] grabbed my arm and pulled me away from where I was. He mentioned something to a woman by me [ I believe she was a nurse like figure, but I'm not sure ] about "finding all the pretty girls in the hospital and raping the f-ck out of them." [ I don't think he thought that I'd heard him. That, or he didn't care if I did or not. ] I began feeling incredibly nervous, but I hid it to the best of my ability. We passed my family [ always female members from my mother's side or my father. None of them ever noticed me, save my father. He glanced at me but said and did nothing ] two times. Some time along the way I mentioned something about "not wanting to be treated this way again." The man looked at me and we sat on some stairs [ the "nurse" woman stood off the the side. The stairs were hard stone ] and he asked me, "You've been raped before?" [ those words rang in my head over and over when I woke up ] I mentioned something about being a virgin but that I'd been sexually abused in the past [ this is true. I have been ]. He raised his eyebrow and almost seemed to feel sorry for me. I thought he'd let me go. Suddenly, he pulled me to my feel and literally dragged me to a room [ more details on the room below ] that looked like both a physical therapy facility and an x-ray/CT scan room. He had the nurse take me to a machine on the far right side of the room. I faced the closed end of it. The man said "We're making sure you won't get pregnant. STAND STILL!" I was shaking violently by this point. I was scared. He had the nurse woman spread my arms out and made me stand holding some bars on either side of me. After this, the man literally growled and tore me away from the machine. He took of my jacket [ it was red ] , leaving me in my tank top [ grey ], jeans, and socks. I noticed my dad outside the room and I told the nurse to shut the door. She did this. The man pushed me onto my back [ I landed on another machine that was on the floor. I hit my back on two bars ] and I crossed my legs over each other and put my arms over my chest. I started pleading with him. "Please, please don't!" I cried over and over [ I was literally crying ]. The man towered over me and he ripped his shirt off and started trying to take my clothes off. I kicked at him and screamed repeatedly. Eventually, I think, I got so afraid that I just woke up. The ending is blurry.
__________________________________________________ ____________________________
NOTES:
About the room-
It was on the top floor in the west side of the building. The sun was setting outside the single window which had blinds over it. The room was cold. The colors were desaturated, but there was blue and white all around me -ironically my school colors-. There were various "machines" strewn about. The door that I saw my dad out of was on the right side of the room right next to the machine I stood by. The door was a flimsy plywood sliding door that had no lock. The only light in the room came from that one window. It was dark-ish

Various notes-
I remember that I didn't scream for my dad's help because I didn't want him to see me so vulnerable. I would rather be raped than have him see me like that.

No one seemed to notice what the man was saying. The nurse never spoke or made any noise.

The man was very familiar and was rough, then gentle, then rough.

My dad looked through me when he gazed my way.

All I could think about when I woke up was the mysterious man who'd made me do something sexual (no details because I don't want to say it) when I was 5 years old.

Around the time I started to faze out from the dream, I remember that the man looked animalistic. He also started to "melt." His image literally just began to melt.

I remember my dad (after the whole ordeal, probably) saying something like "Oh I never wanted this to happen again. It's like 10 years ago."


__________________________________________________ ____________________________
If you can offer any help here, I'd appreciate it. This dream hits home in too many ways. I've had more and more dreams like this one, lately, It's as though my subconscious is trying to make me see something.

Fragments, one involving finding an old sketchbook with an image of a character I haven't drawn (or thought about) in years; another involving a song called Sleepwalker.

A man and a woman in an old abandoned house, the woman's become possessed by the spirit of her ancestor who'd lived there. She says she's hungry, which I, 3rd person observer, am certain is a lead-in to her doing something unnecessarily creepy. She catches a rat and starts chewing on it. I mentally compare it to evil overlords using skulls as building material, too over-the-top and nonsensical to actually be creepy. The possessing spirit knows this man, and she's saying to him, "I will say, however, this is the first time I've seen you in anything but pain." When she says that, he thinks briefly of a relationship he has with someone, but he says, "Come on, be serious -" He then deliberately misremembers her name, trying to downplay the authority she has over him.

(Woke up. Back to sleep.)

FMA-based, Al is on some huge vehicle, like a train but so large it has a deck like a ship. An old man wearing armor and automail is introducing him to what appears to be a little girl, introducing her as a 'mechanist' who works on the human soul, something that's commonplace here, and which Al's been researching and is excited to finally get a look at. There's a good chance that she's not human but some kind of automaton, that's often the case for mechanists; Al isn't aware of this. She's thinking the same thing about Al, she expects the inside of his armor to be full of bolts and springs.

The old man who'd introduced the two of them gets his automail caught in some piece of machinery, which is dangerous. Al and someone else, a large man, work together to free him, but in the process the machinery pierces a hole through Al's armor, allowing the little girl to see inside and realize it's empty. Al is very self-conscious about this, but the girl's thinking something about how impressed she is that "he'll continue investigating the secrets he was investigating, not the secrets of his body" - the research he's been doing has no bearing on his own problem.

Ed is on a different train. Kimblee, a prisoner, is being transported in the same car, it's a car for military personnel, and Kimblee's saying something about whether (something happens) or (something else happens), he just doesn't care; this annoys Ed. He gets off the train and heads for a stadium where he's supposed to meet Mustang, and he's supposed to make it look like it's a coincidence that they both happen to be there, since they're being watched.

I kept waking up due to pain in my throat, so I ended up with six dream fragments. These are my dreams in chronological order.

DILD:

A friend I know in real life is walking beside me in the autumn woods just behind her house. She looks a bit strange to me, inflated like a balloon and stretched around the eyes, but I don't pay much attention to it. The path we're walking is clear through the brush and a light dusting of snow hides under thick branches. I already know where we're going: A large circular camp with an odd hide tent and fire-pit that has died in the cold gusts.
We both have guns slung over our shoulders (a Ruger M77 for me and a Ross rifle for her if anyone's interested) and mine was cooler! By the time we reach the encampment she silently moves behind the tent. I thought that was kind of odd, but whatever. It's a dream, weird shit happens. Seconds later, I hear a shoot ring out, and a bullet whips by my face. I got to seeeee the bullet. My dreams are the best bros ever.
Because I'm awesome in both my real hunting and dream hunting, apparently, I swing the rifle off my shoulder in a fluid move and engage the bullet. It only takes a moment for me to aim from twenty yards and pull the trigger.
Dream ends. Saltwater is gurgled and Benadryl is taken in copious amounts.

Slightly graphic
WILD:

I'm sitting in someone's living room with a government-style dossier in my lap. Paper targets litter the floor and the bulls-eyes are ripped apart by large-caliber bullets. The dull sofa I'm chilling like a baws on is torn and stained in more place than the dreaming human mind can count.
So, I open the flimsy paper book and a severed human head greets me. His skull is ripped open in five spots that look to be about .22-size organized in a triangular shape but it looks to have been bleached under water. A vague sense of familiarity encases the picture when I realize I passed the guy on the street last week.
This carries on with multiple people I can barely consider acquaintances: A late cashier I saw being yelled at by their boss, an elderly lady I helped walk across the street and another foolish skateboarder who fell trying to jump eight steps. Each had nearly identical wounds to the first but the last picture has thin blunt force trauma instead of entry wounds. Guess which one.
Dreams ends. I wake up coughing slightly.

DEILD:

I'm in a gigantic skate park in the middle of the night. I'm not on a skateboard: I'm on a hoverboard. With a laser gun. Not a ton to this dream: I just hovered(?) around shooting other people on their boards between my sweet moves. Nobody else was recognizable due to a paintball-esque suit, but I didn't the feeling that I knew them. You know how your dream tells you stuff like this. But, when someone got shot and fell off their board, they disintegrated on the floor in pixel-like dust.
I didn't win, but I didn't lose either by the time the dream ended.

DEILD:

So I was a swan. A black swan, precisely. I'm not really sure why, but when I tried to move my arms they were big black wings. "Oh, I'm a black swan!" Not gonna argue with my mind there. I flippered, floppered, swan-walked around a little on a strange little hill before I decided to go flying.
It was pretty awesome. One of the better dream flights I've had, because I felt the need to actually FLAP and all. But I knew what would make it cooler: Mid-air fights. Another swan, maybe. I just let my mind process it. Before I had time to really react, three Arado Ar 76 (German jet fighters) pull out of the clouds.
Aaaand, I spit fireballs at them, from my awesome black beak. Rolling, diving, twisting and turning around the pit-patters of machine gun fire and then fireworks as I ignited their engines. Every time I put a plane down another one came out of the clouds until the sun set.
Dream ends. More saltwater gurgling.

WILD:

This one was pretty awesome. When I used to LD a LOT, I created this thing called the Hallway. I used the Hallway as a cool way to access dreams I could remember or plot-lines that my subconscious would be cool. Basically, my mind's eye thinks it's this insanely tall, narrow corridor that stretches out longer than I can see, with monotone brown doors on both sides. Each door has plaque on it where I can "write" whichever dream or things I want in my dream.
I got to revisit the Hallway again, and I picked a dream that looked exactly like the Hallway, because I figured that'd be awesome dream-ception. When I stepped into the new hallway, however, there was only one door. And a centaur behind me. Just as I was stepping through the next door after dodging a charging centaur, the dream ended.
I had to get up and do some crap, but I just passed out on my bed later.

Non-lucid dream:

I was playing a violin. I have no clue how to play violin, but it sounded quite nice. As I played the violin, however, surges of strange colors would flood my vision and twist the environment like I was stuck in a kaleidoscopic tube. There's not much I can say other than each note turned into a specific color or in a predictable way. Associating sound with visual context would be a cool way to learn music in real life, though.

Fragment

I am riding the school bus. I know S is there but everyone else is unfamiliar. We are going on a field trip to look for art references of all things. I think I got mildly lucid and was looking for my dream guide as an art reference.

Fragment: Minecraft


I am in a rainforest biome. I jump off a mountain into the water.

Brains!

I am in my tech school class and the room looks pretty normal save for there is a door in the corner of the room where we have the green-screen set up. The greenscreen has been replaced with a marker board and the remaining camera equipment has been pushed aside.
I am on my computer... doing whatever when the teacher calls us over by the door. He begins by drawing a brain on the board. (Given this is an art class, I think we are learning about... how to draw brains...?) So I expect he will experiment with drawing the brain from different angles and what not.
No, the dream goes a different route. The teacher is actually going to lecture us on the different regions of the brain and what their functions are. (Again, this is an art/computer animation class)
The first thing he does is draw a small circle in the middle of the brain. He makes a joke by saying that this is how much of his brain is actually functional. A few people laugh, including me. He then erases the circle and begins talking seriously about the lesson.
I get bored almost immediately and begin to think about how this lesson COULD actually intrest me. I think about the only brain related topic that I'm actually interested in, in hopes that maybe I could bring it up in the class discussion. (Obviously that topic is dreaming.)
Hmm...Dreaming. Lucid dreaming. I should do a reality check.
I don't even finish my thought when a dream character bursts through the door and shoots me with a gun. I wake up.

Well screw you too, random dream character.

A little bit better recall last night.

There was one classical mother dream - I spare you.
Again containing our old house - and my grandmother.

Once more that theme of being in some way or other in that other house, where I used to get thrown out and lately leave on my own - but always something different is a reason for a bad consciousness towards these parents - me having done something wrong - twice with other people involved with me and my mischief..
Funnily - again there was music in my dream - this time the father of the house started singing some historical x-mas hymns..

Also again a bus ride/journey.
Boring stuff with forgetting things in the bus. Searching for money, seemingly going lost all the time..

Later stopping at a bakery for cake - and it ends up a butcher´s shop but with lots of books on how to do butchery and a talkative butcher..
I got my cake anyway from him.


Later were again derelict houses present - and me wondering, if one could squat in them or find something interesting.

One thing I feel I got from the menthol-thread - having rose-shoots and inventing some system to fast-grow them in maybe 40 cm diameter and 1.5 m high glass tubes - and these were full with plants and soil - and especially long mushrooms - and the roses liked that and made their way up the tubes.

This I proudly presented to my grandmother.

A quick disclaimer: This is extremely long due to not only the dream itself being long, but a nasty habit of mine as a novelist to write things out with lots of details and never summarizing anything written. Since dreams aren’t meant to be novels, I’ll work on avoiding this and shortening it up much more in later entries. I hope you find this dream interesting nonetheless. My apologies!

TL;DR: Went to some fields, did two ToTMs (a third one failed), met some radical dream characters, went to some lounge, fun times happened.

I woke up from a non-lucid early this morning and decided I’d do a DEILD. At the time I had no intention to complete the ToTM, just to lucid dream. The attempt was successful, and I remember opening my eyes and being in bed, my pillow directly in front of me, but the feeling and the atmosphere of the world verified for me that I was dreaming. I pulled the blankets off of me and got out of bed. After a quick glance around I immediately realized I wasn’t in my bedroom; it was a rather extremely small room with a single square window, a wooden door, and my bed. I decided I’d go out the window (floating through glass is fun) and sort of dived straight through it, going airborne in the process.

I stopped moving and started floating around in midair when I went outside as I began examining my surroundings. Turns out the building I was in was a good 20-or-so stories high and I was at the top, but it was completely empty in the stories below mine. The wooden door I had in my room didn’t lead anywhere either—it was just jutting out the wall in midair. I floated around in the air, and realized just how dystopian everything looked. I appeared to be near a beach at a coastline, rows of office buildings were lined up neatly below me, construction workers were busily working on the road underneath, and not to mention that the night sky wasn’t a midnight blue, but more like a very dark red. Hardly any stars covered it, either.

I scowled to my subconscious at its choice of dream scenery and decided I’d teleport elsewhere—there was no good to come from here. I flew down to the ground and to one of the office buildings and went inside. Everything was tiled a clean white inside, with marvelous spiral staircases connecting to the upper floors, but the building was completely empty. Anyway, I studied the floor and made sure to look away from the outside world, hanging around for a few moments as I began to ‘map out’ in my head what I wanted. Despite being a lover of the forest, I wanted perfect green fields and a night sky filled with stars and galaxies that lit up the world. I set up the notion that that was what was behind me, and turned around.

Outside of the window I immediately saw what looked like a spiral galaxy, got excited, and walked through the window (seriously—try going through glass, it’s fun). I couldn’t stop appreciating how vivid the dream was, how the breeze would brush against the tall grass and how I could hear my own voice when I shouted out, as soundless dreams are sometimes a problem for me. I grinned victoriously and examined my surroundings further. There was also a small stream nearby, and a small dark building standing alone in the middle of the plains. After spending a few moments looking up and appreciating the starry night sky, I went ahead and decided to check out the building.

Inside were… just a bunch of halls with a bunch of dream characters walking around, really. Even after waking up I have no idea what the point behind that building was. It was the moment I saw all the people walking around that I suddenly recalled the task of the month. I remembered having to ask someone for a present, so at the end of one hall, I went up to a lady with long blonde hair and brown eyes, dressed casually, who looked like she was in her mid-20s, and asked politely, “Can I have a Christmas present, please?”

She smiled at me, although I somehow got the idea that the smile was a little bit condescending. She said ‘of course’ and led me down the hall to a row of shelves with loads of items, as if in a store, that I hadn’t noticed before. It was clear I was also trying to recall the other ToTMs as well, as she then picked up and held a pair of snow white jean shorts for me, and went to explaining, “These shorts will help you stay hidden in the snow, incase you ever need to. Use them wisely.”

Immediately I was flooded with twenty questions. Clearly she’s referencing to the Arctic Wolf-related task, but I can’t wear shorts as a wolf, can I? And won’t those shorts be really cold to wear in the snow since my legs will be completely bare? When will I get to use these? Why is she giving me white shorts anyway? Why are dreams so weird?

Oh, well, whatever. A gift’s a gift, so I nodded and took the pair of shorts and said, “Thank you.”

“Merry Christmas,” she replied, giving her doll-like smile once more before running off.

I remained puzzled there for a moment before deciding I’d go ahead and do the wolf advanced task. I remember it being the task I was most interested about and excited about doing, so I didn’t waste any time to get ready. Oh, and I really don’t remember what I did with those shorts—I had them in my hands one moment and they were gone the next.

Whatever, dreams aren’t supposed to make sense.

Anyway, I set the notion in my head that it was completely snowy outside and then went ahead and went through the back door. It was, indeed, completely snowy outside, and I grinned at my accomplishments thus far.

Oh, and for some reason it was suddenly daytime too.

I rarely ever transform into something else and therefore I was mostly winging it when I attempted to turn into an Arctic wolf. My plan was to run around the snowy field and set the expectation that I would transform into one whilst I did, so I ran through the snow, paying attention to my arms in front of me and willing them to turn into paws. For a good 10 seconds it didn’t work, but I kept my confidence up until eventually I saw my arms transition into snowy white paws and was able to run on all four legs. Success!

I slowed down and immediately pressed down against the snow, trying not to be seen by anything nearby. I immediately wished that there were trees around, as there was no place for me to hide except behind a stone that lay in the middle of the snow. I started heading towards it until I noticed a small brown bear in my peripheral vision to my right. I turned my head towards it the moment I spotted it and pressed my body down against the snow once again, hoping not to be spotted. Unfortunately (most likely due to my fear), the bear had seen me right then (bet you wish you had those shorts now, huh Maxis?), and gave me a growl as it padded towards me. Although I’d probably usually run away in these cases, I somehow felt a new sense of strength and courage as a wolf, so I launched myself towards it instead, resulting in a battle between us in the snow until I eventually killed it with a swift bite to the neck without even a scratch.

Smirking at my victory, I decided this bear would be my prey. Hey, I killed it, right? With my paw I ripped out a piece of its fur and flesh and started curiously nibbling at it. The taste was sweet and very salty, like salted apple slices, and I quite liked it. The texture on the other hand, was squishy and slimy, and though I could manage to swallow the piece down, I was repulsed by it and after a few more bites eventually decided to leave the bear for some other animals who don’t mind yucky textures to eat. With that, I left the bear in the middle of the snow-covered fields, transforming back into a human with ease as I turned around and began heading back into the building. Advanced task done.

From here on everything gets a little blurry and the dream jumps a little bit here and there; I was still highly lucid, but the dream wasn’t as vivid was before, although for some reason I didn’t think to fix it. Nonetheless, I went back inside and continued on with the dream, deciding I would talk to some dream characters (interacting with them is fun). The moment I went inside I was greeted by three girls who all looked around 8-11. I never asked their names, but for the purposes of writing this we can say the youngest one, a timid bright girl with flowy light brown hair, was Viola; an outspoken one with long curly black hair was Tori, and the oldest one, a social rebellious tween with bright blonde hair was Rin.

You know, because the names fit them well.

Anyway, I don’t know or remember what it was, but I somehow knew the three were all orphaned sisters. They immediately began talking to me about Christmas and how they wanted an amazing Christmas this year. Once again I was thinking about the ToTMs, so in one way or another I ended up asking them if they wanted to build a living snowman together. They all cheered a unison “Yes!” and I remember there was a bright smile on Viola’s face. Tori pointed out to me that there was an area in the building covered in snow despite being completely inside, and she led me to it. All four of us stopped at this room that, despite having a ceiling and walls all around, somehow snow managed to get inside. This is where we could build a snowman.

Viola had an excited look on her face when she whispered to me, “I’ve never built a snowman before

“Me neither,” I replied with a smile. I live in Florida; it’s summer all year round.

I immediately got to work and was winging it when I dropped to the ground and tried to gather up some snow in a ball. I got the lower body finished until suddenly Rin spoke up. “Hey Max, have you seen this book?”

I headed over to where they were sitting in a group and Rin held a hard-cover black book with some sort of blurry white symbol on the front that from first sight looked like a novel. The other two were glancing over her shoulder and skimming through the pages. I told her I hadn’t seen it, and she explained to me what it was about, but I can’t remember now what it was. It was some sort of really serious topic, perhaps a controversial one, that I didn’t like or was otherwise uncomfortable with. Whatever it was, I didn’t read it, only listened to them talk about it.

They mentioned all three of them had to read it for school and that they really didn’t want to, but it was a requirement or they could fail the class. Rin was most especially annoyed, being the more rebellious type, and went on talking about all the flaws in the school system and how they should fix it. Tori was constantly agreeing with her, although I’m pretty sure Viola and I eventually tuned her out.

I don’t remember how it came about, but one of them mentioned their friends being in a lounge at some sort of dance club and wanting to go. At this point in the dream my lucidity was still there but a little bit lower than I would’ve liked it to be, so I decided to tag along and take them there. We left the snowy room and went back outside, and this time the fields had completely changed into a city (still snowy). It was similar to the one at the very beginning of my dream in that it was right at the coastline with rows of buildings lined up by it, but it was much brighter and lively than before. The roads were like giant sidewalks in that you were supposed to walk on them, although for some reason there were still traffic lights at intersections. The layout of the city looked strikingly similar to a common city in Serifyum (my dreamworld), although the Earth-like features (the people, the roads, etc.) told me it wasn’t. Rin told me the club was just down the street, and for the most part I led the way as we went onto the road and headed down the street.

I hadn’t said much and I think Rin was still talking about the school system, but I wasn’t listening. Nothing interesting happened for a while, but when we stopped at an intersection, I decided just as a practice for dream control I’d make an attempt at levitating the traffic light. I willed it to rise from the ground, and after a few seconds there was no success, but eventually it detached itself from the ground (the light itself still working) and began rising in the air. Although unintentional, it was spinning in place too, and I simply grinned as I watched it.

I heard Rin go silent behind me and the other three gasp. Tori turned to me and asked, “How do you do that?!”

I didn’t say anything immediately as I lowered the traffic light safely back into the ground. I turned to them and saw they all had a look of surprise and glee on their faces. All I said to Tori was, “Just dream and believe,” smirking as we kept going.

Eventually we went into a building that was designed like a complex hallway with red walls, floors, and ceilings. I knew the actual club was further in, so we kept walking through the hallways. Eventually, though, I realized that the halls were fairly crowded and the sisters were able to get ahead of me, so I told all three that I would catch up with them later as I slowed down behind loads of people (specifically this one guy who I’d never spoken to nor recognized but immediately disliked him for cutting me off). Fortunately, the further in I was, the less crowded it seemed to get.

It was then that, as I paced through the halls, I realized that with all twists and turns the hallway gave you, it was more designed like a maze rather than just one straight hallway. For some reason, I’d assumed in the dream that I had been here before (false memory), so I automatically knew which ways to go with no trouble. I paced faster than I usually would go, only stopping briefly to playfully flirt with a rather pretty lady and tease her as she got all flustered up, and kept going until eventually I met up with my old gym coach from 6th grade. She greeted me and pointed to the right, “Right this way, Max.” I gave her a nod and a thanks as I walked in the dance club.

Well, okay, I never actually properly walked in the club, as right before it was a door that I knew would lead into the lounge. Without hesitation I walked through it, and what I was greeted with was a pleasant surprise.

I’ll only go briefly over this, but I’ve made a group fictional characters for the purposes of simply talking to them, and I’m very closely attached to them resulting in them popping up in my dreams and helping me go lucid. In the lounge were a few members of these group as well as the three sisters from earlier hanging out with them. Upon seeing them all, my low lucidity levels had shot back up again and I grinned, they as well saw me as I walked in and were glad to see me. I jokingly asked, “Hey, what a surprise!--having a party without me?”

A girl from Serifyum with her heavy foreign accent replied, “Don’t be foolish Max, we would never,” as she walked up to me, giving me her special greeting. I went around the room greeting everybody individually and asked how they were doing. I also couldn’t help but notice how one of them was reading the exact same book the girls had had earlier, but I didn’t think to question it.

Long story short (half because it’s mostly personal and half because I’m having trouble remembering the order of everything), we all had a long and decent conversation together, chilling in the lounge couches, going from video games to music to other various more personal topics. Maybe around ten minutes had passed before I eventually felt the dream finally begin to fade out. I tried to save it, but I always forget how, so finally I heard sounds from the real world coming back in and the dream getting more and more blurry, until my eyes drifted open as well and I had woken up.

11.12.2013

Random Gun Fire Kills Children in Sporadic Intervals (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

When I became lucid, it’s in a dream setting similar to a school cafeteria. It's completely different from the pre-existing models my mind usually utilizes. The flooring has the basic bland light gray colored tiling with black tar/rubbery-like substances between the creases.

It's either morning or early afternoon, and there's a lot of individuals in their own groups. Two distinct groups where the ones that seemed to be Hispanic. For some weird reason, I had some predisposition into thinking they could be two gangs that have turmoil between each other.

It seemed pretty normal in the sense of a school having individuals desperately trying to find an identity for themselves through gregarious activities with peers to have some illusory perception that there could actually be sustainable bonding. And I happened to be in the middle passively acknowledging their existence.

I hear abrupt and short bursts of gun fire to the left, and I immediately turn in that direction to see the group to the left of me panicking and crowding around someone that may have been shot. Naturally, I get up to see what actually happened.

There's a man who seems to be close to descending into a crying fit as he's holding a dead child in his arms. I can't really describe the details of how the dead child look because it was too disgusting to even contemplate on it.

There's blood streaming through the child's face in several directions, almost as if there's some kind of radial streak originating somewhere along their chest. The group seems to be in a longer state of shock, and I didn't pay attention to what was going on with the group to the right of me.


For some reason I wanted to confirm that this actually just happened, that a child just randomly dies due to gun fire that was very difficult to confirm where the origin was. Seeing how there were walls surrounding the building, the only presumption that can be made is that the bullets can somehow pass through walls and people and solidify until it meets whatever target the shooter wants.


After looking at the child and the man who seems to be at his nadir, I presumed he was either the father, or some kind of relative to the child. Then I noticed most individuals here seems to be around my age or even older, and it felt weird with them existing in a school that would seem to be formatted for Middle School and High School.

I don't know where I'm headed, but I just wanted to get out immediately because of my current attachment to the high state of paranoia of who would be next.

This next environment seems to be an expanded version of the previous one, and the next attack seemed to have been initiated diagonally to the right. I'm sitting with a dream character that was a counterpart of the waking life individual I talked with in High School mostly though lunch period.

Although his existence didn't really seem to matter much, though for the sake of just getting some descriptions down:

• He was wearing a bland gray shirt, dark blue jeans, and his usual messy hairstyle

• His body composition emulated gestures that seemed as if bad was going to happen, though I'm not sure why I'm led to believe this

Most of my attention was on the right section of the dream environment, and I seemed to have some restriction to turn to the left. Maybe it's because I felt something bad would happen in the direction I'm paying attention to the most, or it's something else entirely that I wasn't aware of.


Then more gun fire comes in randomly, and everyone starts screaming. I get up immediately, and the person to the right of me gets up and seems to be shifting his head left and right frantically trying to find where the shot came from.

Turns out it's another child that died, though I didn't bother to take that into consideration seeing how I ended up bringing out the neurotic state again. Since the attack came from afar, I didn't bother paying attention into looking at the child.

Because at the point, if I came in to see what would happen, I would be questioning why I would want to make the attempt to go there and confirm whatever visualizations would show up of the late child's body. And like the previous event, I get out like everyone else eventually did.

_________________________

11.12.2013

Running a Mile in 4:30 (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Guess DILDs are my frequent means of reaching lucidity. That's glad to know considering how haven't done any WBTB lately, and the fact that I was sleeping late and waking up fairly late as well.

The environment looks exactly like the middle school I used to go to, except there some weird atmospheric overlay of brown, orange, and other warm colors. It seemed it was close to night time, but the sunset managed to sustain its existence for a pretty long time.


The conditions of the dream with the environment, and where I was placed with other dream characters and other factors such led me to believe there was going to be a mile run. I can't recall when the coach blew the whistle, but I proceeded to run at the same time everyone did.

I seemed to have realized my legs wouldn't tire out, though I seemed to have been experiencing psychosomatic processes where I felt like I was tired after running fast from the start. The dream shifts to where now I have to go around a huge ring where there was a large field of grass in the middle.

However, it wasn't necessary to go around this circle. All I needed to do was get to the middle, and then turn around and dash all the way back to the start, and then turn to the right to the next new outer ring. I was stumbling a bit in my movements, but then a random image somehow gave me a jolt of energy.

Out of all the imagery that could show up to emit some kind of emotional response, Shanks from One Piece shows up and fades away. It was a younger version of him smiling while wearing a straw hat, at least younger than the current version that looks like he's in his late 30s or something.

Either that was some weird reference on how Luffy has a long-term goal of eventually meeting Shanks when he becomes more powerful, or just a random image altogether.

Anyway, deus ex machina kicks in and I'm running very fast. So fast that I'm already close to finishing the mile run and I'm already by the large gates that I have to go outside the edges. I then get the urge to propel myself to run even faster and finally reached the end.

The coach looks like exactly like the waking life counterpart that seemed to be in his late twenties. He was wearing a dark blue polo shirt along with dark gray sports shorts. He checked his stopwatch and stated that I finished the mile in 4 minutes and 30 seconds.


Clearly something I never was able to do during middle school or even in my current state.

The dream shifts to where I'm heading somewhere holding a cellphone and calling someone. I don't know who it was, but based on how I felt and communicated with them, it was someone really close. Though that's pretty vague seeing how it could be anyone really. I told them how I managed to finish a mile in 4:30, and by that time it was night time.

_________________________

11.12.2013

Messy Apartment and the Realism Distracts Me From Dream Logic (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I'm in an apartment that resembles the one when I was in College Station, and it seems my father was on his way over there. I didn't know how much time I actually had, but with the situation I'm in now in the dream, my apartment was a horrible mess.

Everything here felt so real to the point where I really started to get distracted. I tried formulating ways to clean up this mess before actually doing so, but I barely got anything done. Then the dream shifts to where I meet an individual in waking life that I'll just abbreviate as Jas.

Jas seemed to be close to this area for some reason in order for me to interact with him so easily. He looked exactly like his waking life counterpart, probably to near perfection. His expression and his fairly passive demeanor to twist his words a bit to make himself look better seems to be there, but that could just be my conceptual schemes playing out within this dream.

He seemed more casual, and even friendlier than he is in waking life. It was almost as if I was a very close friend of his within this dream. I was getting something out of a Jeep Blazer vehicle, and I seemed to ignore the fact that I owned a vehicle for once as well.


Jas was stating something, and I interrupted him with a joke since how what he was saying was going to end up awkward and weird. I forgot what I actually took out, but I went back to the apartment only to go back to square one on what to do with the messy apartment.

Sometimes I wonder if it was an error in perception on the apartment being messy, and instead it I was probably confused on how there were so many objects in front of me that were most likely organized in a weird fashion.

_________________________

11.12.2013

Relative Catches Me Late at Night (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I'm just going to be lazy and give a brief overview of what happened:

• It's night time in the dream
• I wanted to get out of the house that I was in for reasons I can't recall
• My relative wanted to get out, but he wasn't aware that I was outside for a few seconds
• I ended up walking into his direction, and he's surprised on how I was able to get out
• I go back into the house

Sleep Score: 90 approx
Lucid Dreams: 2
Sequence:
- attempted WBTB
- sleep time: 10:40
- actual sleep time: 11:00
- wake time: 4:45
- back to sleep time: 5:09
- actual back to sleep time: 5:30
- LD #1
- LD #2
- wake time: 10:30
Notes: each LD did not require a RC, it was just a consciousness that it was a dream, this is how it's been happening lately. Slight worry about WL vs Dream State confusion issues, must continue to practice RC.
Key words: high school, bathroom, police, french