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First Dreams - Very Weird:

Dream 1:
I was hanging out at some carnival, it was a very gloomy day. It also had enormous lecture halls beneath the ground in several buildings. After wandering around for awhile and eating some gross carnival food, I went down into one of these lecture halls and sat next to a couple friends from high school. President of the United States (PotUS) came to give a speech about something, except he wasn't Barack Obama, he was some young punk that looked like a young Barack Obama (Maybe 16 years old) and he was extremely cocky. He got up in front of this mostly empty lecture hall that could probably fit about 600-700 people. This guy pulled out a gun and my mom came out of nowhere and jumped in front of the bullet. She got shot and lay there bleeding while the young PotUS just watched with an emotionless look on his face. I wondered, why the hell would she do that? He must really mean a lot to her. Dream fades to black.

Dream 2:
I was back at the carnival, it was raining this time. I wandered around again until I eventually found my way down to the lecture hall. I sat in a different place this time, farther in back. Exact same thing happened otherwise.

Dream 3:
Back at the carnival, this time there were a couple of cops as well. They gave me a hard time and ignored me when I tried to tell them that someone was going to try and shoot the president. I eventually went down to one of the lecture halls, as though I had no choice in the matter. This time, the PotUS was coming out of the lecture hall right when I got to it, some guy came out of nowhere and tried to shoot him. My mother jumped in front of the bullet again. Same stuff.

Dream 4:
After fading to black this time, I became lucid in the darkness. I guess this would be a true DEILD. I tried to create a different scene because I was tired of watching my mother get shot over and over again. Didn't work, I was back at the rainy carnival, this time one of the cops was holding me down and....spanking me? It was a horrible, helpless feeling. I told him that he was a nice guy and that he didn't want to hurt me. Didn't work, so I told him the same thing again while I transformed him into another person that looked like a stereotypical hippie. He let me go and I teleported to another world. I was at a beautiful house on the second floor. I started in a tiny bed that might be appropriate for a little 6 year old. Being that I am 6'3, it was a little too small for me. I was feeling tired all of a sudden and I wanted to take a nap, so I looked around, expecting to see some giant beds to lay in. Two, giant super king-sized beds appeared behind me with small rays of light shining down on them from some skylights. This room reminded me of what my parents' bedroom looked like in the early morning when I was a small child (a recurring place of safety for me in dreams). I moved curtains over the skylights so that I could take a nice nap without light. I then realized that if I took a nap in a dream, I would probably either wake up or go to a different place. I didn't want that so I decided to look around instead. The house was quite an interesting design, I thought. The entire building was in the shape of a '+'. Outside of the room I was in there was a balcony that led to the other wings of the home. I looked over the edge and saw an indoor river, surrounded by plants that led to the front door. Outside of the house, there was a zen garden and an old-school, large, wooden gate that led to a busy street (there were no cars, just people walking). I went down into the garden and noticed the edges of the dream starting to blur. I stabilized. These bugs started attacking me. First it was mosquitoes, then spiders started jumping at me. I didn't like that so I ran away. My heart was pumping super fast and I woke up.

Dream 5:
I was at my parents house and there was a giant snake that was slithering around like a lil' creep. The cats tried to kill it but it escaped into hiding. Soon there were baby snakes everywhere. One bit me, ouch, nothing bad happened so I assumed they weren't poisonous. I decided that it was time to catch that sneaky little snake. My sister and I picked up some giant butterfly nets. This snake was extra tricky though, it would take the shape of one of the cats and then there would be three cats and we would have to figure out which one was just the shape-shifting snake. After going through this process of the snake taking cat form, us discovering it, then it running away a couple of times, my sister eventually caught it with a net. During this process a couple random, nameless DC's got brutally torn apart by the snake. It didn't seem like a big deal in the dream but now it seems kind of messed up. I put my net over hers and we welded it shut with torches coming out of our fingers. I woke up.

fragment:
I was only semi-lucid during this dream, so I won't count it as lucid. I remember that there was some dream guy that was talking to me. He told me that he could tell me a grand secret of lucid dreaming if I went to this magical pool of water. I went there and my body turned into water. I blended with the water and became the water. Then I woke up. Super short dream.

Super long fragment:
I was hanging out at some strange building with my brother and one of my uncles. We all decided to smoke some weed outside, then they went down into a double secret basement that was three floors beneath the surface. I didn't want to go down there so i stayed at ground level. Eventually some weird stuff started happening and the dream turned into a kind of ghost murdering RPG. The house turned into a ranch out in the middle of a post-nuclear testing site in a desert somewhere. There was also a giant group of people with guns and swords now. We hacked and slashed our way through ghosts and possessed people that turned on us. After awhile, I had probably killed these ghosts a hundred times and I got tired of it and most of the group was dead so I ran towards the home and went down into the double secret basement where my uncle and brother were hanging out. My uncle had been possessed and my brother had to kill him. My brother and I got overrun by dozens of ghost-demons and he got pulled behind while I barely escaped. I went up to the top floor of the building and this strange light zoomed by at super speed and drove away all of the ghosts that attacked me. My mom and dad were hanging out up there, reading books as though nothing were wrong. I asked them what that light was, they told me it was their little dog. They said she was possessed by the guardians of the property. I asked them if the guardians protected my brother too, they said that the guardians refused and that he must have done something pretty naughty because they wanted nothing to do with him. I woke up.

In my dream it started out like I would any day in my waking life, I wake up, my head may feel light or like I need some refreshing, except in the dream I never feel refreshed I always feel this stiffness of wanting to escape from reality.

I then find myself coming up with a story, it begins that I am stuck in a time before time ever existed, I then think this might be related to dinosaurs and such. So I find myself running away from these dangers, animals, micro organisms, it didn't matter what size they were I was afraid of them all. It didnt want to be in this world anymore, because there were no people, no buildings, nothing built off of human society.

I was scared and alone, then it got weird. I was told by a narrative voice that outside of this world was what I had experienced before (in my waking life) that I shouldn't be afraid of what is untold, lost, and forgotten because it didn't matter.

I was then trying to find food for babies, this had nothing to do with the last dream but it seemed as if the last dream never came to an end, there was no switching between dreams or anything. Anyways, I was having to find baby bottles and figure out which bottle was suitable for the baby, if the milk was spoiled or if the baby needed something else. I was getting frustrated because I was being watched the whole time, and it made me uncomfortable. END

Dream from 12/21

Ben was giving me a tour of a jungle farm where they were cultivating bees for honey. The bees were high up in the tree and had entirely exposed hives. Ben drew attention to some nearby ants which had the special capability to extract water from the trees. These swollen ants were hot commodities in the bird world. A bird which I called a manakin in the dream (actually much closer to a particular flycatcher whose name evades me) was eating some of these ants. It had parts of its feathers which change colors in a fluid fashion in the light. Then, a keel-billed toucan contests the bird, they have a tussle, and then they separate.

Dreams from 12/22

I was operating an electrically-assisted pedicab for the day. I wanted to have a beautiful entrance while being filmed, so I made several attempts to pick up my first passenger in one motion with them dropping 5 dollars in my tip jar as they boarded the moving pedicab. I then continued onward through town (I'm not sure where). I remember being aware of pot holes that need to be avoided and the traffic that zoomed by paying me little to no heed. I then had the thought that the city could benefit a lot socio-culturally from having a much slower stream of traffic.

I left school after my final exam in a course I think I added at the last moment. I am returning home when I see Chris Harvey who mentions his desire to toke. He apologizes for mentioning it since he wasn't sure how I felt about the act. I asked him if he was more of a liberal conservative. (Not sure how I phrased it, but it turned into a political discussion). I then began to flap my wings as I usually do in dreams and floated slowly above the trees. Then, I'm connecting this with a fragment where I toke with my parents and briefly discuss the merits of pipe-smoking.

Legend: Non-Lucid , Semi-Lucid , Lucid

Last night was kind of a mess. i had to get early so i set my alarm, but a storm came in and the power went off a couple of times. So i had to reset my alarm. All of this took my mind off of dream recall so i didn't get much.

Fragments:
I go skiing with my dad. We are at the top of a very tall mountain. I start worrying if we'll even be able to get down.

I'm in Florida with a friend trying to break into my teacher's chemical closet.

I'm driving along a road and this guy asks me if i want to trade cars. I yell 'Yes' and i end up with a crappy version of my original car.

I flew in ordinary dream, then remembered, that in dreams it also possible, count
fingers - 7.
I flew through the window, and landed in the street. I put my hands in the wall to earn points and hardly remembered about ice sculpture task. I was on a cross in my town
and there was enough space for snowstorm. I began moving my fingers on the right hand slowly and all became grey and there were snowflakes and decorated snowflakes like in previous LD . In some moment i understood that i need more power. Then i began moving my left hand and left fingers. When i understood that snowstorm was strong enough, i turned around to find what sculpture to make, and found a rose bush. It was without flowers, but with leaves. I wished it and finished the snow storm. I felt fingerpain in both hands. When it became clear, i saw a ROSE BUSH MADE FROM ICE!!!!! It was about 2 meters and it was so .... Every leaf, every branch was so attractive and beautiful, that i came to it, broke off one leaf and took it in my mouth. It was cold, and melt slowly. I decided that the task was finished and awoke.

Morning of December 22, 2013. Sunday.



This dream was not that short, but much of it was based on attention regarding perception and focus of just a few ideas and images. In my dream, my brother sends me a particular JPEG photo on Facebook (which he had not done in real life before - he never posted images on my Facebook page). I am at the computer and when I look at the image, it is very clear. The image is mostly of a Teddy bear sitting on a smaller stack of books in the center of a bed. Also in the room are lots of other details. For a time, I seem to be doing photo projection (within my dream itself) for some reason.

After a short time, I notice the image seems to change as if it is doing a slow 180 degree pan (central to the Teddy bear position) on one side (as I move my head side to side very slightly) and then the other so that I can see what had been behind the Teddy bear and see other things at different angles. This happens in a very subtle way in some photo projection experiences (depending on the image) in real life, but in this case, in my dream, it is quite intriguing and amazingly vivid (though I am not lucid). It is as if all the image-based data of a full 360 degree rotation is somehow encoded within the one otherwise flat image (seemingly oriented within the center which - again - is represented by the Teddy bear in this case - for example, as if the Teddy bear is the hub and everything around it is the 360 degree “wheel” which pans around 180 degrees to each side depending on how I move my head - however, I still do not see up and down in a similar way in this case relative to detail change).

I decide that my brother sent me a special kind of hologram, perhaps without knowing that himself - or maybe it is a new technology relating to holographic photography (that he is absentmindedly “showing off”, or not knowing that I do not have all the equipment associated with its full usage) of a type that goes beyond the much older View Master types (and the very old technology relating to 3-D back in the 1940s and such being far superior to what they make these days, some of which is actually fake or rendered artificially). In my dream, I am contemplating how it works, thinking somewhat about the small plastic cards with images that appear to move through a stage of several frames when you change the angle by moving it slightly, but I think that would require a special monitor with several thin and angled layers.

I am thinking about talking to my brother in an enthusiastic state of cheerful surprise. There are other photos; one, I think, of his cat on the floor of his kitchen and at least one outside scene.

A little later, I seem to be in the parking lot with some of my belongings near a mall in Wisconsin that had been north of all the places I lived in the region (near Shopko, I think - based in Ashwaubenon, Wisconsin, near Green Bay). A younger male approaches me from the southeast. I seem to be near a table (or something set up with a piece of plywood on top); perhaps it is part of a larger flea market oriented east to west though I do not see many people around. I am sitting down at that point on a small chair. The man seems friendly, but I still feel a slight suspicion as if I feel he may attempt to rob me at one point, but that thought is not quite the dominating one. The man seems to be low on money and wants to know if I could buy some agates from him. I am not quite sure how much money I have, but I tell him that I already have a “guitar full of agates” (which is based on a much older real-life memory where I kept a large number of agates in an old guitar of my father’s, but this was over twenty years ago). I even describe to him what each one looked like as I put it inside the body of the guitar. I tell him about the ones that look a bit like candy corn, the red and white striped ones, and ones that look a bit like they have Paisley designs on them. He does not seem to be threatening at all (even though I hold the mild expectation of such) and he asks another man approaching from the north who is apparently there to look at something else at the implied flea market.

Eventually, I start talking to the man selling agates about the new holographic technology and how you can actually “step into” the images as if they were much like holodecks on the newer (“Next-Generation”-based) “Star Trek” shows (although earlier I had only seen “inside” the photos at a different size perspective). He listens, being only mildly interested, but does not comment. He just wants to sell all his agates to get enough for a small meal, I think. He is thin and passive. I do not think he will rob anyone “yet”.

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This turned out to also be precognitive relative to what my wife had been looking at, at the mall (including newer holographic images she was thinking of buying - one of a tiger), without any knowledge of such on my part or me sharing my dream beforehand. Funny, but happens every day to some extent. The other way it was precognitive involved pretty close detail to my brother Dennis (same brother as in my dream) posting images on Facebook in my timeline which he had never done before and no prior clue he would do so. I thought I had updated this particular entry in this section, but had not - partly because it happens so often. It had the usual “something bigger than life at work” feeling.

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Morning of December 22, 2013. Sunday.



This entry will include two dreams that I first held back from posting on one of the journal sites, as each time, someone else had posted something with the same words in the title just seconds before. One was the seven-pointed star (LINK) and the other was the white robot (LINK). It also almost happened with two others, one relating to red lasers and the other, blue fireworks. (The “red lasers” one, I actually did not even fully reveal in the entry itself, just a “red trident” on stage for the most part - but rotating red spotlights and red lasers had also been more involved.)

The first dream was slightly stressful, but not exactly fearful, just a bit of an uneasy feeling about human ignorance and possible “unnatural alterations” in life.

This is actually based on a real-life event, which also made me quite puzzled and slightly uneasy, which is duplicated in my dream to a similar scene. In my dream as well, I am looking at photographs of mostly forests and natural environments. My mental focus may actually be wrong in this case regarding past memories, as it may be a fluke. Over time, I notice seven-pointed stars as lens flares rather than the expected six-pointed ones. This seems to indicate something “wrong” - something very “unnatural” (although there are flowers that can have seven petals including anemone nemorosa). (It is probably similar to how you would react if you thought you saw a heptagon-based honeycomb). I look again more closely, and do indeed see seven-pointed stars as lights/flares. I sit there in somewhat of a daze, but not much happens. I am contemplating if it is the result of some new form of digital photography that alters the electromagnetic spectrum.

Also, I notice that some of the light patches are also heptagons, which makes me a bit more uneasy. I am certain that only hexagonal light patches exist in the natural world and that these heptagon “light cells” had been artificially made with dire consequences to come, perhaps even human extinction. I get a slight awareness that bees may try to make heptagonal hives and fail since they cannot tessellate and honey will have to be produced in solely a synthetic way from then on. (My own eyesight only makes six-pointed light cells directly.)

Apparently, camera lens flares can have any number of points (I mostly only remember seeing six or eight, though.) There are supposedly five-pointed ones as well as a much larger number (assuming the photographic images I have seen are unaltered). Most of the more “dominant” ones, I have only seen with six, though, as well as only see hexagonal light cells (which are often too rounded to imply a polygon, though) before in photos and only recently (in real life) seeing the heptagonal ones. Apparently there are even services that make lens flares for you made to order. This was possibly influenced by the J. J. “lens flare“ Abrams comments and memes lately. I stopped watching the newer “Revolution” series (new in my region, anyway) as it was unwatchable for me (and I am a science-fiction fan) and has two of the more annoying characters from “Lost” as well. It will probably turn out to be “magic” over science again that they claimed “Lost” would never be, but was (although I really liked “Lost” and still do, for being so random and meandering - especially with all the fun with running gags and puzzlement, both real and feigned, on the IMDb forums).

In the white robot dream (another link to J. J. Abrams? - in regards to “bad robot”?), a woman is watching a white robot “standing” in a canoe that is going down the river. She is throwing things at it, including various coins. The white robot has no legs but is more like a “giant bank” (like a piggy bank) at one point - its head and body both somewhat upright trapezoidal, about four-feet tall at the most. However, the woman fails to hit it or get any money in. At the same time, she seems to be getting angrier and also throws rocks and sticks (but misses). The robot seems to beep and mock her with slight turns of its head.

After a time, it seems the robot (or “runaway bank”) is “watching” her in an implied “sarcastic” way and mocking her more. However, the canoe it is in goes over a waterfall and the event completely wrecks the robot, which seems a bit amusing - all that effort to evade and mock the woman (the owner?) yet it is destroyed anyway.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I'm on a travel with a couple of girl friends, to a remote location where there is a labyrinthic underground like the one under our hometown. Ours was once a revered sacred place, protected by spirits and not for the weak of mind and heart, but accessible to the pure souls as a soul searching, spiritual growth journey. Unfortunately it is now haunted by all sorts of demons and dark creatures who started coming out of the undergrounds and attacking people in their own world. We want to meet the people in this twin town and see if they are going through the same problem and to seek alliances to fight evil. I carry precious gifts to offer to these people.
We arrive at night and we don't see a soul. We head to the entrance of the underworld, looking for answers. As we go deeper, something happens, we hear sounds, see shadows, we're not sure what happens, but I fall on the ground and all the precious vases and statuettes I was carrying get broken. As I pick up the pieces from the floor, feeling hopeless about it, a man appears.
He welcomes us and takes us to a larger open space, with a few doors on the rock walls. He asks what we're doing there and we explain. He says in this town they have indeed faced an increase in the dark energies and spirits, but they have found a way to control them, by moving themselves into the undergrounds and owning them. They have established dominance over the underworld and now share the space with the shadow creatures. The creatures tease them and sometimes are a bit dangerous, but they found a way to keep a balance, although it seems that people's lives over here are not easy or ever relaxed.
Still, he gives us a plan on how to take back the power over our underground domains. The plan involves taking over a route that leads directly to the center of the labyrinth and take control of its main sacred room. He says two female guards should be at the door at all times. He also says our main concern should be the werewolves, sworn enemies of our female warrior guardians order.
In fact, on our return home, we are attacked by a couple of werewolves, but they are not ugly fury beasts. During the day they take the form of handsome manly men. But I never let down my guard and we manage to fight back and scare them away. Still, there's a long fight ahead of us...

The fragment had to do with Christmas anxiety: in this dream my mom asked me whether something could be thrown away, and I looked, and they were transparent Legos, and I said "no! These are part of the kids' Christmas gift. What are they doing out here anyway before Christmas. Should be hidden, and not on display."

Maybe something more shows up - but rather not - I´ll put a number in anyway..
Didn´t dictate - didn´t sleep well - was a bit under the weather..

1.) Fragment:

I sit in a laboratory with three guys all in white-coats, and there was an experiment going on, about brain-chemistry.
And they didn´t know about LD - and I started telling them - one was not impressed - but I tried to motivate the other two to do an experiment like that one, we did - but with lucidity - in rats - ah well.

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00:00 Sunday 2013-12-22 comp #16 night #10

01:30 bedtime. Why oh why do I persist in these late bedtimes? Just can't tear myself away from DV. Will get to earlier eventually to see how the dreaming goes...

04:17 bowling with friends.

1) I'm in a bowling alley, I bowl a ball. There's one pin left. O from Lx shows up to play the game with me. The pins start moving around dodging the ball, O is doing this via some control. O takes a shot, and I do the same thing, press a control and make the pins jump out of the way. After the shots we're waing for two other friends to arrive in their car. We're in the parking lot which is very full, someone pulls out and we jump in to the place to save it we're waving with our hands pointing to the spot, therre are other cars coming but our friends make it.

Walking beyond the parking lot, I see a bunch of people sitting together in an area, they're old funny looking Indian/South American looking people, they evolved somewhere where there is lots of water and this is a very dry place, so they're very uncomfortable. A lot of them turn to look at me with big eyes.

It took a bit of effort to get this recall. At first there was nothing. Surprisingly, since it's still quite early and I was quite tired, I feel almost no drowsiness. After about an hour, drowsiness returned, and I got the sinking deeper relaxation going, but movement in bed woke me again and again right at the critical moment. At some point fell asleep for a brief period before the alarm went off at 08:00.

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00:00 Saturday 2013-12-21 comp #16 night #9 LD #13
01:30 bedtime
02:16 real bedtime

04:10

F1) a bunch of people becoming lucid, in a competition

05:34

F2) ice cream shop in the mall it's our shop, we expanded it, I see the early construction of just the foundation and the subfloor. Everyone's congratulating us, they like it better than the smaller one. There's a spot at the end which is ours. Sister and BIL came by the shop.

F3) moving through a huge 3d building/space there are peole everywhere. There is a love story, there is only one person for you and you're trying to find them sometimes there are hard situations where more than one person wants the other. Moving through these huge structures, getting to the top (flying?), I'm trying to get higher and higher to get to the top to see something about the roof. I"m not able to get up there.

07:36 "The dog that wouldn't die"

1) On deck at parent's house, I see my dog wrapped up in newspaper, he's very warm there in the sun, he's normal sized, but he's not responding to me, I unwrap him, I think he's dead, I take out the small battery from him and I see he's dead, now he's a tiny dog in which fits in the palms of my hands. I show him to my wife, I'm devastated. I run into the house to the laundry room to find some batteries to bring him back to life. I'm running in "where's the battery!? Where's the battery?!" My son shouts after me "that's stupid, don't even try it, what are you doing?" I get a battery and put it in. For a moment I see him alive, then I don't see him any more, and I think "where did he go?"

I'm entering a mad scientist laboratory, a big industrial medical facility, I'm talking to the mad scientist. I see a living dismembered dog head on the table strapped down. The face is facing away from me the head is lying on its side, I see the severed neck meat with the bone in the middle. There's an experiment that's being done stimulating different parts of the brain of the dog which are actually located a bit down on its back. Then the head is upright on the table facing me, the pelt extends down beyond the head. They run experiments and the head yelps and yowls and apparently dies at the end. It's very disturbing. Something is written on a sign in red next to the head, it reads "Hi (my name)", an assistant says that was painted with yak butt blood. I'm outraged by this whole thing. I just want to take my dog which is in a bag by the table who has been brought back to life by the scientist. I take my dog and run away with some other kids.

2) sliding down a hill with some other people with some animals, my dog zips by on his own down the hill. We're going somewhere, maybe to the beach. We come to a house, there are kids and adults. There's a hedgehog walking slowly across the lawn away from us. We look at him. The hedgehog then see see is climbing up on the beams of the overhang of the roof. Someone says "don't shock him! He was starting to come out!" I look at him for a little while and decide he's not coming out.

I go inside the house and see a bag of chips (round flavored corn chips) I eat a few chips and realize this bag may have been meant for something else and shouldn't have eaten them. There's a party in this house, there's a lot of food open around the place, there's taco mix, dips, there's a table in a living room they're packing up this food to take it somewhere, there's a bag on a table, I lift it and hear glass clinking together, I think there may be wine insdie, I look inside and see two wine bottles, they're opened, I'm thinking "how are these not spiling, they're on their sides?" I look inside there is an amazing invention: a special stopper that goes down inside the bottle that allows you to store an opened bottle of wine on its side. There's a funny big upright handle that attaches to the edge of the table (like a beer tap) that holds the opened and stoppered bottle of wine upside down. The idea is you must pick up this wine with one hand upside down, and you pass the bottle to your other hand, and it won't spill because of the stopper (explanation goes on for a while about the hand passing).

3) I'm with people in daylight in California, wow look at the blue sky, it's warm, There are kids and parents, they want to slide down the hill, across a busy street, I say "STOP!" "Don't do this, you have to set up someone to watch for traffic. When a car is coming you have to signal stop, and when the way is clear you signal go, I hold up my hands to show the signal for stop and the signal for go. The kids are mimicing these signals to show that they understand. I'm amazed at this blue sky, I'd never get that sky where I currently live.

F4) I see the DG (wife of JT) with funny looking eyelids. I think about how peole change, I saw her in a party room.

08:12 BTB

10:52 Christmas mother lightwaber battle crow girl (LD)

F5) I'm a detective.

4) Christmas celebration. I'm home finally to see family for Christmas. Not my family though, I don't recognize the faces. A very large, sumptuous rich home with huge rooms, in the room where the Christmas tree will be. Earlier I selected a tree, and set it up, I thought it was a great tree, I brought it into a room to set it up and decorate. The tree starts falling apart, and I realize it had been constructed from smaller from little bits of branches all tied together. I could see little potted plant pine trees as part of it, it fell apart. I saw a green flag tied to the top of the tree, I thought it was a signal that it was a bad tree, I'm pissed about this tree.

I'm in a room with other men, trying to set up a long series of table/benches in order to be the work surface for preparing Christmas/decorating. The men are some agreeing with me some disagreeing, I'm setting up the tables so that one interlocks with the other to form a very long single table.

In a huge sumptuous house arguing with people I don't know about how to set things up for Christmas, we're disagreeing, there are two cavernous adjoining rooms, we're in the living room and the dining room is just beyond us, a huge open aired area. I'm upset, this is not how I wanted it to be, I wanted it to be the way when I was a boy. They're saying "we can set up this room then that room." I say, "NO, that room's the dining room, we're not going to set up the tree in there.

Then the whole thing turns into a giant mall with canned Christmas music and stores, highly commercial, my Jr high school best friend is in a shop preparing something, I'm so upset because this isn't how I want Christmas to be, I'm on the verge of tears. Then my mother (young) is on my left walking with me, I'm trying to hide from her that I'm crying, I don't want her to know that I'm upset, I think "I just wanted Christmas to be like when I was a boy!" I don't want to say this to her. Mother says to me "I think I know why you're upset," she's being very motherly, trying to explain that everythingis OK. We walk for a while end up outside.

5) fruit salad. In my parent's house living room. Wife is fixing somebody a fruit salad. I say "it's OK, I'll maek the fruit salad." I go to the kitchen start cutting fruit, I realize I don't know how much to make so I go back to the living room to ask who wanted it, "OK who's going to have the fruit salad?" there were two middle-aged women sitting in chairs to the right, one say "Oh no no I won't," the other woman says "Yes I'll have it," and someone else had left. So I went back to fix it.

Back in the living room, lying down on the couch, I look behind me and see a glance of my father naked, "ew" I think I didn't need to see that, then I thought "wow my body's a lot like his." There are guys in the room and they're fighting, I'm imaging it's a light saber battle with toy lightsabers with collapsing tubes. They're real but they're not. I'm imagining a lot of ways I'm winning this battle, lots of maneuvers like in the Star Wars movies, cutting off both hands of the opponent in a single swipe, I think if you cut their hands off it's such an easy way to win. Then I think "just cut right through them! How can you stop a light saber?!" Just cut their heads and bodies, I imagine doing this. They don't fall down or die. At one point I move to the entry way and extend my light saber about 15 feet to bonk one of the other guys.

6) crow girl LD #13

I'm in an unknown house in a hallway I see a room at the end, in the middle of the hallway just beyond me there's an open door leading up to the attic, it's like a closet stairway the walls are lined with books it's extremely cramped. I know that crow girl lives up there. I think she may be my wife. I have a feeling this is a scary nightmare. I call for her and expect her to come down, she starts coming down the stairs, she's young and beautiful with black hair but with a scary nightmare movie dead zombie exression on her face. I expect her to turn into a crow at any minute and it'll be scary. All of a sudden she's a small doll like a little straw man doll in a burlap sack with a drawn-on face, I'm holding this doll out in front of my face with my two hands. I start running the other way down the corridor all the while with my eyes fixed directly on this doll. I move into a room at the end of the hall still looking at this doll. I expect the doll will transform any second and it will be scary. I think "well that will only happen because I expect it to happen." I'm looking at this doll and realize I'm dreaming and I'm partially lucid. I'm still holding the doll and still scared a bit, say "I'm dreaming" again and all fear is gone, I'm lucid, and the doll is forgotten. I turn around in the room facing the door to the hallway. I'm ready for goals now. I begin my practiced group summons, and say "OK, line 'em...." I stop myself, wait, here I am jumping into girl stuff again, my partner's name is Pickman, I'll summon him and get some team points going, what was my partner's name again? Oh yeah, Pickman. And the next thing: I say again: "OK, ladies, line 'em..." (again I don't get to the word "up"), I'm instantly awake in bed, and finish the sentence, "oh, shit."

A slight variatoin on sleep-friendly fusion SSILD this time, I did it a few quick alternations like I mentioned last time: quick SSILD cycle, then relax, quck SSILD cycle, then relax, but then I moved to doing them together: I did the longer SSILD cycles, but with a relaxing mindset, so that I have the attention focused on the senses, but a softer attention, and try to move deeper into relaxation while doing the cycles at the same time. I do a few long cycles this way. Either I dropped the SSILD and went to sleep or I fell asleep while doin this combo technique, which would be great it's just what I was trying for!

Didn't stabilize! Argh! I remembered my teammate's name, but didn't remember to stabilize. I was also not calm, I felt very rushed.

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00:00 Friday 2013-12-20 comp #16 night #8
01:46 bedtime

05:19
lots of action in this waking, way more than what's recalled, I'm walking around doing lots of things.

1) morgan freeman has sexy time with a hot she-male. My view is from the feet of the she-male lying on its back. Morgan has his head oriented towards the feet and is face down, lying off to the right side of the SM. I say "Hey, this one's all you, Morgan." MF pays oral attention to the upper-body lady parts, and then moves down to do the same with the man parts. I'm thinking "ew."

2) a traitorous attack on a US warship by a team which intercepts American forces. Intelligence arrives up the river via boats via woman who hold the data, I see these boats arrive, once they women learn the schedule of the US vessel they deliver it to the interception team. the interception team launches a full scale attack: helicopters launch up from between the palm trees, some helicopters are purple, some are green, fruity/bright colored. I'm DO. George Bush Jr. is president and is on an open barge/boat with the interception (traitor) team, he doesn't like it, he's confused about this attack. All the traitors are trying to convince GB to attack, he doesn't want to. A black labradoodle dog (one of the traitors) with a half-dog, half-Jeb-Bush face is running on the shore alongside the barge, saying "We have to call mother and tell her to call George to talk some sense into him." But George is angry. I give the orders to the attacked ship (which is the USS Missouri, and is anchored in a harbor in a tropical island) to return fire against the traitors. I see massive gunfure erupt between the two ships. The traitorous ship is larger and has a much stronger stream of firepower hitting the smaller ship than the smaller ships's fire towards the larger. This isn't what I intended, I thought the Missouri would have the stronger firepower. I get a close up of the process of enemy ammunition arriving at the Missouri, and the return fire. It is a very large Metal snak-like contraption, where incoming fire enters through the "mouth" travelling inwards, and outgoing fire is move from section to section and fires out of the mouth. Explosions take place on the internal sections, sometimes destroying the outgoing ammunition. I see a close up of one section, little legs descend from the section, where the outgoing munitions fall down and are protected from the incoming exlposions, then the legs retract back up and the munitions continue on the path to fire.

F1) The machines know how to clean up. There's a lot of dust left after the work. I see dust on the work surface and it's getting swept up.

07:30 breakfast duty, didn't make it back to sleep?

8:59 BTB
had to get up at 10, I woke up at 9:59 before my alarm went off!

10:01

F2) middle-aged woman in a house I'm staying in. She's wearing a black top.

3) I'm working on my laptop, my wife is walking around behind me. There's an asian man leaving the bedroom of our house with no shirt on. I think "THAT's odd!?" I wonder what he was up to there. He's got small baby sized shirts, and he's handling cash. I talk to my wife, "did you sell these baby shirts to him?" She answers yes. He's rushing, he says he's working on the Makefile for a project, he has to meet other people to get the project put together.

There are two women standing in a street talking. My view is the perspective from the ground looking up. One was an old girlfriend, I see her stomach is sticking out quite a bit, she's wearing jeans, "Man, she got fat!" I think. I was trying to see if it really was here.

F3) Two Very hairy redhead men with very bright orange chest/stomach hair.

12:19

4) football formation. There is a team of small boys in formation (a wedge) protecting a goal, I'm trying to find a way through to score a goal. I dodge some of them by faking them out but there are too many to make progress. On the sides of the formation are super short/small (large doll sized) boys. I stand in front of one and hold my privates protectively, because I know these little guys' job is to block by hitting opponents in the privates.

5) I'm holding a laundry basket approaching the elevator, I'm meeting the babysitter who is coming for the first time. The babysitter started out as a dark skinned curly black haired girl but became a guy at the elevator. I'm smiling as I approach because I recognize him from the intercom camera but he's never seen me before. I say "hi I'm (name)," I joke once we get on to the elevator because the laundry basket is not very full. I say jokigly "yeah I had a HARD time spreading them out in the machine so that they don't clump together!"

6) It's early morning walking down a city street, the early morning sun is shining, the street itself is deserted but there are some people sitting in outdoor cafes on the sidewalk to the right, basking in the early morning sun. A lot of them are naked. One guy comes up to me and claims me, I learn that they are vampires, that's why the streets are empty, this is the time that they can claim you. I have to figure out how to escape, maybe by getting a room in one of the hotels off to the side of the road.

F4) in a party environment, I've been drinking the $60/bottle liqeur (there was lots of detail, forgot)

F5) in a loft in a building, I'm arriving, I'm calling my dog to come up there

F6) flying fortress with dragons, over the water. The fortress is being torn to pieces in the air.

F7) wife approaches a pieno, trying to find the music, there's a pot of water underneath the piano, the music is falling down, I say "don't let the music fall in the water," she's having trouble finding the music, she wants me to help.

Very happy about continued back to sleep success.

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00:00 Thursday 2013-12-19 comp #16 night #7

01:27 bedtime

05:58

1) We're hiking up a foggy mountain. We want to get over the mountain but the fog is in the way. Someone says it's always foggy like this. We hike up the foggy side, and when we reach the summit the fog clears and we walk down to a beautiful ocean. On the shore of the ocean is a large, transparent, very shark/spiky with many spikes, crystal statue that I know is a sacrifice statue.

Then I'm in the L's (neighbors) garage with other spike crystal statues. Don't touch them. I glancingly touch one on the side by the wall but that's OK because it's not the main one. There are many statues like this around, one up in a tree.

F1) picture of some pepole on a porch. English is not a good language to use, So many different languages need to be represented. (Voice incomprehensible in places)

F2) homeless guy with a stick. The stick was invisible. He'll clean up the yard if he has to. People following him around think he's crazy, but the kids know he's not crazy because they can see the thing he's carrying.

06:06 BTB
06:32 still up, wife snoring
07:24 BTB again after kitchen/cereal snack

09:03

2) star wars jedi game playing on a game tablet, I'm making the game character do many maneuvers to slice the opponent with a light saber. Opponents are trying to jump up and follow the action. I'm not doing very well, a guy is watching me play. I'm sitting at a desk in an office. My workplace is messy. Some young kids walk by behind me, they're looking at my desk, I have a teeny tiny keyboard, he asks what's that for, I say it's a small keyboard, I show him my desk, I have 3 keyboards, a small one, a medium one, and a large one, and I say it's like Goldilock's and the 3 bears. The kid's not interested and just walks by. I was trying to impress some of the girls with him, it didn't work out.

3 ) walking on a nature path. There was a place where you used to be able to drink using the supplied plastic cups. But to save money they've stopped supplying the plastic cups. I cup my hand under the tap and fill it with water and drink. There's a pond nearby. There were several old women, and there were old cup dispensors around and old used cups.

4) sitting at tables outside with a group trying to eat some really strange fruit. It's hard to eat, you can't chew it, it's green and stringy and fibrous. People are trying to peel it and erat it and chew it. Some of the fruit looks like pink, translucent kiwis. I look across the table, and see a really nice large gourmet cutting board made from different kinds of wood pressed together. I say "no THAT'S the kind of cutting board I want to have, not like the teeny tiny ones where you chop a carrot and the carrot falls off down to the floor because the cutting board is so small." People around me aren't paying attention to what I say.

5) aftermath of a party. I remembered that a lot of deserts were left in the refridgerator so I go to the kitchen to get some. In the kitchen on a table I see they have been left out so tthat people will eat them. Tere are a number of large industrial food trays with a fairly large amount of various left-over deserts. 4-5 different trays. I"m looking at them. There's a gelatin-based one, a tiramisu, I'm picking up pieces of these deserts and carrying them around with me. Wife is there at one point.

6) standing outside at what are like deli counters. There is a group of teen girls there. They're laughing at me. I'm holding a squeeze bottle of some condiment. One of the girls approaches me indicating the bottle and asks, "Ooooh, are those ONIONS!?" and puts her mouth to the opening of the squeeze bottle and I squeeze some of the condiment into her mouth. She gets grossed out by that. They ask me, "is this (something) day? It's not celebrated in California" in English and I answer in a foreign language. They all laugh at this, they're amazed I speak English, I'm amazed that they're speaking English, too., because they're foreign girls.

woohoo major back to sleep victory with a snoring wife.

F3) arriving at some location in a car. I get out and see a flat dead roadkill squirrel is somehow attached to the side of the car. It is rolled up. As I look at it it falls off the car to the ground. It unrolls before my eyes and turns into a live cat, moving around.

09:23 up for breakfast duty
11:38 BTB nap
12:11 dreamed about something, no recall
13:00 no recall. unusual, naps usually give several dreams.

It's been a long time since I've been on the forums, I just can't seem to keep my dream discipline . Anyway, as I become more conscious of my dreams, this is the first to be clear enough for an entry, so here we go.

The earliest point of the dream I can remember begins when I am at a Beyonce concert. The context of this is that my friends and I have been planning to go to this concert for months, however none of my friends are here with me. The dream at this point is not clear enough for me to realize the peculiarity of me being at a Beyonce concert by myself (I don't even listen to Beyonce). The concert goes on, I can't seem to absorb anything from it, as time just doesn't make sense. I notice that I am in the seated section, far above the stage, I can barely even see Beyonce. I also notice at this point that the GA section is completely empty, as is a lot of the seated section. I do process the the thought that it's Beyonce were talking about and that there should be way more people here, something feels off...

So as I sit there, becoming more and more disoriented, people start to notice I'm in distress. Its as if I am heavily under an influence, however I can't remember taking anything. I can feel judgment coming from the other people that probably thought I was drunk. I try to stand up and it is extremely difficult, I wobble back and forth until eventually falling; no matter how hard I try, I just cant get control of my legs. An older man comes down from a couple rows above (as I am thoroughly causing a scene now) and starts looking at me, I don't think he even said anything, but I know he thought I was drunk. I tried telling him "I promise I'm not drunk," but I just couldn't get the words out. All that comes out is raspy jibberish and coughing.

The concert ends and the lights turn on, Although I am extremely confused, I make my way towards the exit figuring I'll get some merchandise just so I can say I've seen Beyonce. However, everyone is quickly guided out and the doors are locked and the lights turned out, no more merch I guess.. But as soon as I am outside the venue, I realize it's my high school. I am so relieved as I can just get my dad to pick me up, whereas if I were in the city it would be much more difficult. I try calling my dad but I hear no ringing and become distracted by my surroundings. The gears start turning in my head, realizing Beyonce would never perform at my small town high school.. Also, over the tops of the trees, I can just barely make out tops of buildings, which is very uncharacteristic of my rural suburban home town. I quickly walk around the other side of the school, more city buildings. I am so utterly confused at this point. I see all of this and know for a fact, something is wrong. I recognize that these are two extremely different places colliding. I begin getting worried about my mental health, maybe I'm going crazy, either way I just gotta get home and then we will sort it out.
The thought also crosses my mind that maybe I took too much of some weird acid or something and now I have no idea where I am or how I got there, I dismiss this thought as unlikely but possible.. Also, throughout this chunk and the rest of the dream, I repeatedly put my headphones in to listen to music at inappropriate times; I catch myself and remove them, but the music doesn't stop playing in my head. I notice the strangeness of this and also blame it on my surfacing mental illness.

I somehow end up in the back seat of someones car, texting my dad for directions on how to get home from NYC. He sends me a picture of the train I need to catch to get home. I ask the driver if hes a cab driver and if he will take me to penn station. Turns out, he wasn't a cab driver, but looking to make a quick buck he throws some other girl out of the car and helps me out instead. He takes me to some building where I have to buy my train ticket. I enter the building and it is crowded and dirty (as expected). People are being shuffled by security into separate ticket lines. One security guard points me to a line, it takes me a bit because I was very timid and he became frustrated. I made it to my line, there were only a few people in front of me so it wasn't going to take long. I take notice to the couple on the line next to me, it is a man with an abnormal amount of facial hair, even the bottom halves of his very large ears have stubble. I notice he is holding a woman, this woman has the face and hair of a lovely adult woman, but has the body of a 3-4 year old wearing heals. The man holds the woman as she laughs and kicks like a toddler. I think to myself "to each his own" and wake up.