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I couldn't remember much from last night but I could remember the last bit of the dream. I was in school and I walked in a computer room which I was not familiar with (long time since I was in school). There was a couple of people who I have never seen before and I then see my 2 old friends on the computer next to each other.

GOAL: To remember more in my dreams

I was submerging slowly into darkness. But it wasn't total darkness. There was something moving in it. My vision went more elaborate... moving objects were people. I was flying, gliding slowly above street, large buildings were standing around it. It was night. The street lamps were shining with bright yellow light. I felt unsure. I felt dark, wild, dangerous emotions targeted on myself. I needed to push feeling of fear constantly away... that feelings were trying to attach onto my consciousness.
People walking on the street were dark. Not dark as in skin colour or clothes colour, but they felt dark. They emitted darkness from themselves... It looked like black aura was around them. When they felt I'm there flying peacefully, pushing darkness away from myself, they all started to converge to my position. I felt oppressive force engulfing my consciousness.... I tried desperately to move above, to be unattached to what I saw and felt. It functioned somehow, not fully, but strongly enough. I flew directly through those people... and I left them behind, I was gliding faster and faster into peaceful darkness and losing slowly consciousness falling into dreamless slumber...

Remarks
*It was late when I went to bed, I wanted to see nice drama in TV. I was tired and I programmed myself to be well slept in 4 hours (to go to work), which I managed, even if I felt to be slow the whole next day
*I didn't try to exercise my relaxations, I only let my mind slowly descent into slumber maintaining consciousness.
*Subjectively about 10 minutes long experience

November 02, 2015

Sleeping 2pm-10pm

We are inside some building. Collecting things to evacuate. Vince is there. I look at the clock and it's 9. Actually 3 minutes past. The end of the world is any second now. I pull up the window shades so we can watch how it will happen. It's ok. It won't be long now.

Quick WBTB 8mg galantamine 500mg Choline

#476 - DEILD - 4:33AM

I have a FA and go to the bathroom. I have the unusual bathroom weirdness and wonder when I woke up. I am looking at websites on my phone and realize I have no memory just before this. I am distracted with multiple popups filling my screen. I wake slightly.

I notice my headache from the previous day seems to have come back but I force myself to relax into a DEILD and I flow right back into the dream state with vibrations. After a moment, I get up and rush outside. The dream is really unstable and I try forcing things to come into play. It's cold outside as I move off the porch. Suddenly, I hear a child crying. It sounds like like my son. I remember worrying that we would wake up and ruin my LD so I am not sure if I can really hear him or not. It's way too dark outside and I can't really see. The crying gets louder and I am convinced he's coming into the bedroom. When I wake up I hear a phantom sound of the crying as it fades away.

I am annoyed I let my mind trick me and I relax back into DEILD.. The vibrations start up right away and I am stuck in SP for a long time not really getting anywhere. I switch to visualization and things start to form more easily. I am not walking in my fully lit house thought the dream is still a little dim. My cat's appear and I spend a little time playing with them until the dream gets going. I notice that I still have a headache and I am very distracted by it. I am on my hands and knees and I hear my wife loudly stomping into the room. I look up and she bends over near the couch. I think about sexy time but the dream fades away. My head hurts too much to focus on DEILD again.

I have some wakefulness because of the headache but it seems to ease after awhile I and eventually hit WILD.

#477 - WILD - 4:56AM

I am in quaint little house almost like a hobbit home. I see the rabbit from Alice In Wonder Land sitting in a recliner. He notices me and begins to run off screaming about being late. I get excited and say, "Lets see how far this rabbit hole goes!" I quickly follow him through a confusing hallway and outside. It looks like my neighborhood and the rabbit's house is where mine should be. I follow the rabbit into a version of the empty house next door. Everything looks like it's made of old, weathered decking material. It's wet and rainy in here and my feet are bare. I can't ignore how unbelievable cold my feet are. Suddenly, I recall that I put my feet out early because I got hot, but now the fan is blowing right on them. This thought process wakes me up and indeed my feet are way too cold! DAMN! I was having a cool dream!

Got to play catch-up with the DJ!

#455 - DILD - 10.27.15
I watched several episodes of iZombie just before bed.

I am surrounded by zombies and I am having a hard time killing them. I only have this tiny object to stab thier skull. It just wont work. I try to think of something better. Suddenly, out of desperation, I realize non of this is really happening and I must be in some sort of dream state. I didn't mentally verbalize any of this. I just knew I was invincible in a non reality — a low level of lucidity. So, I did the first thing I could think. I am the stronger zombie. I begin biting into the closest one, ripping chunks of flesh away. I take the time to notice there is no taste. There is only the sensation of biting deep into something that feels like foam rubber. I wake up.

I don't remember much of last night's dreams. I keep waking up overheated, which I don't think is helping me.

I just remember that I was somewhere sort of like an old apartment I lived in in my old hometown, and my mother was extremely angry about something... something to do with a window... and I was really scared and woke up yelling.

Then I went back to sleep, and I don't remember anything else.

First fragment

I was iny house. It was dark, and there were no energy. With family we lit a candle.

Second fragment

I saw everything from top-down perspective. I had to protect an underground fortress from a siege of darkness. I readied armor and sword, and then I was attacked by a huge pumpkin that launched molotov cocktails at me. It hit me in the end.

Third fragment

It was night. I was going towards a shop with my mother.

Non-dream
Non-lucid
Lucid

Set up a DEILD alarm for 1:30, 3:20 and 5:10 last night, trying different alarm tones for each. I found that the 'rooster' sound woke me up but the others didn't. After kind of putting off dedicating effort into DEILD I decided last night that I'd give it a proper try, so when I woke up I actually managed to lie completely still with my eyes closed. I remember reading some advice somewhere that you should focus on a point, so I focused on the centre of my forehead. It kind of felt like meditating in a way. I decided that it was a good enough attempt for the night just knowing that I could do that if I wanted to, then I got up for a WBTB.

Dream 1 - Poison caterpillars
This dream was pretty interesting, I woke to the 3:20 DEILD alarm and tried cementing it to memory which I found a bit easier than I would if I had moved around. I was in a room at night time, my friend John was here too and we seemed to be in a survival kind of scenario. We had to go to sleep for the night so we each had our own floor mattress and bedding. I lay down to go to sleep but at some point in the night a friend from back home called Fraser showed up. He was the guy we were trying to survive against. He placed these caterpillar-worms on us that were tiny at first (~1cm long), but soon grew to be maybe 7cm long. They poison you just by touch and have these alternating purple to green bands along their body. I remember one crawling on me and thinking that the touch of it was stinging. Fraser came in and took the grown up caterpillars, like it was supposed to be every ones goal to get them (like a quest item?). I was pretending to be dead I think so he wouldn't notice I was still alive despite being poisoned.

Dream fragment - anime artist?
I remember a group of people on a sunny day walking down a pathway by the road and they were somehow related to anime/manga. Possibly the artists who make it

Dream 2 - Family guy
I remember having a dream where I think I might have been Bryan from Family Guy. The dream was telling the story of how Stewy and Bryan met and how they came to become a part of the Griffin family. Apparently Stewy was adopted alongside Bryan it seems. I think I (Bryan, who at the time I called Mike because I forgot his actual name) went to a one-off job. I met Stewy there who I seemed to hit it off really well with, we ended up become tight comrades and somehow headed off on a journey together in a car (feels like third person during this so I don't think I'm Bryan anymore). They end up getting adopted into the Griffin family which I find weird because I thought Stewy was born as a Griffin.

FA - I seemed to remember writing 'Stewy and Mike' into my phone so I could recall the dream later, but when I woke up later on and I looked at my phone... there was nothing! Dun dun dun!

Dream 3 - Trippiest Dream Ever
I'm lying in bed in the middle of the night surfing the internet on my phone. It's the first time looking at a screen in a dream where it isn't actually in 'full screen'. I think I come across some music website. Basically it has an artistic anime-style kind of epic drawing. The whole background has this intense vividness to it, which was hued in a surreal purple colour. It has this anime girl that looks like she's jumped forward and reaching out for something with a smile. The art style really impressed me and caught my eye. The website plays music, but for some reason I was too quick to click on the next link and skipped to a new page. Damn. I backspace and head to the previous window. Huh? The background has changed?? It's now a new drawing in the same epic style, a different girl (different clothes, face, haircut, etc) with a different colour hue (possibly orange this time). I refresh the page -- it changes again. Now it's like a steel grey. I think the girl on this one might have had a short fringe with silvery hair. Wow this is all pretty cool, but I really wanted to see the one from the first page. I keep refreshing a couple more times cycling through the art, some of which comes up multiple times. I end up talking to the person who apparently makes it all, the artist herself. I'm not sure how we're communicating, it's like she's communicating through the screen. I'm also sitting at my desk with my laptop in front of me instead of being on my iPhone. I can't remember what we were talking about, possibly about who she is and how she may or may not be the artist? Shit gets crazy as we talk though. Like... absolutely chaotic. She shows me the art on her website and it's no longer static. Some of which is video clips but they flash past my eyes so fast. One clip is from Bakemonogatari (an anime) as a hint, suggesting that she is the artist who draws it (which in my head explains why her art is so amazing). But it just gets so crazy because it's all so vivid and fast, the next part there's an image of an anime girl who mimics the artists words. Her movements come in a strobe-like fashion, the screen flickers rapidly, her face appearing to tilt right while her smile broadens into this insane toothy grin with wide eyes. What the f*ck is going on? Everything is so colourful and vivid with so much change in the lighting. Orange, green, blue, purple, black, white. It's quite beautiful. Next scene she sends me porn which I try to ignore, then realize that it's still open on my browser. I have to close it down manually. I open up a screen which shows all my active apps and try delete it, only to find that there's an endless stream of porn videos open on my phone/laptop. How the hell did this happen?? If someone saw this they'd think I was a pervert. There's just too much and I don't even know what happens but I wake up, realizing that I'm now in my room for real. It was just so realistic though.

On my 20th day of no PMO using the Brainbuddy app. Safe to say that it definitely affected my last dream O_O. My dream recall improved last night too (the 2 nights before my exam yesterday were below my average by quite a bit). From today onwards I have a lot of spare time until I head back to the North Island. I'll be dedicating a lot more time to my dream practices I think from now on (i.e. ADA, DEILD, meditation, + other related stuff like reading ETWOLD)

I feel myself going lucid, like an energy going up my body, I feel like I'm "falling" in lucidity but I suddenly feel a weird knot, like something close to my stomach, a ball forms? I wake up before I can totally get control of the dream.

I'm in a warehouse with my elementary school class, big windows in front of me show a field and some trees in the distance, sun is coming up. We start doing a dance and I somehow take over, leading it, everyone dances around me in synch except I'm doing different moves. It ends with me doing the Sun Salutation as the sun rises in a golden haze. Afterward I walk to a teacher to my left who commends me for the dance. I say that it wasn't too good, offering a far too simple view of native cultures as close to nature, a modern view imposed on them.

I follow a man with a brief case down a city street. We enter a large glass, modern hotel or office building. I think he's going to do something bad, like rob the place or extort money. As he does that I go up the transparent glass elevator. In the hall there is a bunch of people sitting and standing, like a reception for someone, or a party. I talk to the CEO, a young, handsome guy. He says environmentalist have put a bomb in the building. I panic, instantly accepting my fate. I'll die here. Then I suddenly gain some courage. Can I escape? I go down the elevator, almost out. In the lobby by the front door, sun is shining through the windows, I see a young woman in a white baggy t-shirt and a sign, an environmentalist protesting. As I exit I whisper to her "I agree with you."

I walk briskly out, the bomb can go off any second. As I cross the road and head toward the train station I hear a rumble, behind me a cloud of dust and chaos. I run toward the central train station, people are screaming and trams are crashing. Inside the train station, trams are crashing through the walls, and so are buses. I don't know where to stand, any false move and I'm dead. I stand paralyzed. A mutilated and almost blind bus driver comes out of the break room, he's been out of work for years but because of the emergency he can now work as everyone is now preoccupied.

I see a rat catcher that looks like John Goodman. He says he's killed almost all of the 5000 rats in the train station, but the remaining 800 left are as tough as nails, the fittest survive the longest.

Didn't write this dream down when I woke up so don't remember as much, but it was pretty cool.

I was at some award show, like the MTV music video awards, and there was a camera pointed at me recording my reaction to the performers. I didn't realize this at first so I was on my phone half the time and then when I realized cameras were pointed at me I pretended to look happy and surprised. They soon got bored with me and focused on some other kid. Afterwards, I somehow ended up in Taylor Swifts dressing room but I didn't know it, and she soon came in. Her hair was a lighter blond than it is now and her voice was higher than in RL. She was really nice and me and some other people were talking to her for awhile(wish I could remember what we said). Before she was about to leave, she asked me if I had ever been to her concert. I said, "no.. but I would love to go! That is.. if you're ever coming to Milwaukee" and was thinking she was gonna give me concert tickets. She said something like, "oh.. so you wanted to talk to me because you wanted concert tickets?" in kind of an annoyed but still nice voice, and I replied, "no, no, of course not! I'm just happy to talk to you! You don't need to give me concert tickets." And it ended with her saying something like she was gonna talk to one of her managers to hook me up with tickets.

In a DEILD, I started to wake up from a dream and felt funny, so knew I was dreaming. I was outside of my house with Dani. I walked around a bit and then decided, for the millionth time, to try to summon someone. I expected her to be around the corner, but when I walked around it there was no one. I think I did this twice. Then I shouted her name, which started to wake me up so I stopped and focused on the scene for awhile. I had no idea what to do so I jumped up in the air to fly but only made it like 10 feet then fell back down. I couldn't remember my dream goals so I just kinda walked around for awhile until I lost it.

edit: ok, NOW I remember what my LD goal was. It was a goal I was very excited about. Darn. I have to repeat the goal before I go to bed so I remember it.

I'm in a supermarket, there is almost total darkness except for some emergency lighting shining from one corner of the ceiling. Giving a green tinge to everything. I am shopping but i am not along. There is a couple shopping also. A woman and man with lank hair, glasses and moustach.
They go to leave. A worker uses a flashlight to see what they have bought and workout their bill. In the light he sees the man has an ice cream wrapper at the bottom of his other basket. He has been scoffing stuff secretly. The worker in a floursent jacket and cap, glasses, radios security to tell them the man has not been eating a balanced diet.

I was in a condominium. I used the elevator but it was stuck somehow. Had to open it up manually.

I went up the roof area. It's like a garden there.

I walked down the stairs.

---

Notes:

- This might have been due to a recent issue I encountered with the elevator.
- Just now, I encountered a stuck elevator scene in a game.

I'm laying on a bed. It's made of forged iron, painted white, with high, graceful spirals making up the head and feets of it. The sheet are white too, as is the bigs fluffy pilows. translucents drapes billows from the ceiling to the floor around it, half obscuring the light walls and the french window. Say window is half open to a lush garden. It's day time, but the room is shrouded in shadow. I'm surrounded with bright orange goldfishes, swimming in the air in a complex choregraphy. I touch one of the mand it turn into a luminescent blue, shining with its bones shadowing its skin. It stop when I let go of it. I touch another one and the same thing happen. I find it pretty, and touch my own arm. The same thing happen, my flesh turn blue and luminescent from the tips of my fingers to my shoulder. I realise that I'm wearing a floorlenght nightgown, and that I'm sharing the bed with a sandy haired man. He's sleeping, and I touch his thigh. His whole leg changes, and he wake up. At first he doesn"t say anything, but as I gently move my hand to his torso he starts to freak out and begs me to stop. I'm surprised ans doesn't understand why he's so distressed by what I'm doing, but I let go of him and lay back down on the bed, playing with the goldfishes.

In which I have a terrifying nightmare...

I’m walking down the residential street to my childhood house. I take the patio entrance, holding the screen door open with my hip as I fiddle with the lock. It takes a while, but finally, I get the door open, and I enter. The house is dark. From the corner of my eye, I see a shadow dart down the hall, then I hear a door slam. I realize I’m not alone in the house.

I shout, “hello” but there is no response. I walk into the living room, and I flip open my cell phone. I have no signal. I hear footsteps in the back of the house and a voice saying that I’m going to die. The closest exit is the kitchen door to the garage, so I run towards it. I get the door open just as the intruder appears in the living room. I only see him for a second- a man, dressed in black, his face covered by a mask.

I shut the door behind me and enter the garage. It’s dark, and I fumble around the wall searching for the button to raise the garage door. I find it and click it just as the man enters the garage behind me. I run over to the door and wait as the cables slowly crank it up the tracks. When the door is lifted a few feet, I duck underneath and run across my driveway. I’m panicked and not thinking clearly, so I take a fraction of a second to pause and focus. I look to the left, at the front porch of my nextdoor neighbor, then I look in front of me, to the door across the street. Which can I reach faster? Which is more likely to have an unlocked door? I see the masked man emerge from the garage. He’s only a few seconds behind me.

I focus on my nextdoor neighbor’s front porch and feel a surge of adrenaline. If I sprint as hard as I can, I’ll make it before he gets to me. I clench my fists and try to run, but I can’t. I can barely walk. I’m clumsy, and I keep falling over. Even though I can feel the power in my muscles, I can’t seem to get going. My legs are heavy, and I’m moving slowly. I no longer see the killer. Again, I try to use my cell phone. Now I have a signal, but I can’t see the numbers or direct my fingers to hit the right ones. I’m trying to call 911, but instead I keep dialing 201. Jersey. Meanwhile, I’m wasting time that could be spent trying to run.

Briefly, I consider how dangerous it is that I always lose the ability to run in dreams. During my childhood, other kids chased me to this same patio, and I usually made it safe with an “ollie ollie oxen free!” But now that a masked killer is chasing me, I can hardly walk.

Finally, I reach the patio steps and grasp the railings to pull my limp legs up onto the porch. I ring the doorbell and shout for help, then I reach for the doorknob, desperately hoping that it is unlocked. Before I can try it, though, a man opens it and I rush inside his foyer, locking the door behind me.

I’m shouting that someone is trying to kill me; we must call the police. He’s remarkably calm, standing still, smiling widely and showing me his perfect white teeth. He’s young, late 20s, and very well-built, with biceps like tree trunks. But his face is bright and clean-shaven, and he has thick styled blonde hair with frosted tips. Gym rat, I think. Preppy jock. Or gay. Maybe gay jock. Who is he? I remember that Mr. B, who lived there during my childhood, had died. My parents told me that an older retired couple had moved in. Judging by the decor, the house appears to belong to retirees. And I catch a strange smell coming from inside the house.

The gym rat tells me to calm down, and I follow him into the kitchen where he picks up an oversized and outdated cordless phone. I tell him to dial 911, but he dials 201 instead. I start screaming that there is a murderer just outside the door and that no one in Jersey can possibly help us. Gym rat smiles widely again and says that he knows all that. He says not to worry, that he’s already called the police.

“How can that be?” I ask him. “I just got here.”
“I’ve known there was an intruder in your house since you returned from paddling.”
“So you called the police a few minutes ago?”
“Just relax. Everything is going to be OK.”
“Who are you? Do you live here?”
“This is my parents’ house. They’ll be home soon, and then we can all have a nice chat.”

Something about this exchange seems strange to me, and I start backing out of his kitchen. The gym rat notices I’m upset, but he does not pursue me. Instead, he tells me that he’s just had a baby. He points towards the bassinet in the living room.

“She was born in May,” he says. “My first baby.” I start to relax a little. I look at the bassinet. It’s on the floor next to the couch in a typical suburban living room. A lace blanket covers the opening. “She’s sleeping,” the gym rat says. “Come have a look at her.”

“My niece was born in May, too,” I respond. “They’re at a fun age right now.” I’m trying to calm down and make small talk. I keep looking to the window. When will the police arrive?

The gym rat crouches down next to the bassinet. He removes the lace blanket and smiles down at his baby. Then he says to me, “Don’t you want to come see her?”

I walk over and look down. The baby’s belly is exposed, and I see a rose tattoo just above her belly button. The skin of her stomach is red and raw. I’m not sure what I’m looking at; I’m confused by what I see. Who tattoos a baby’s stomach?

“They say you have to be very gentle with babies,” the gym rat says. He looks up at me and smiles. “I guess I wasn’t gentle enough.”

I look at the baby again and realize what I’m seeing. Her belly isn’t just red from the fresh tattoo, it’s bruised blue and purple, swollen from beating and bloated from decomposition. This rotting baby is what I’ve been smelling.

Immediately, I run towards the door, and this time I can run. The man doesn’t follow right away; he stays on the floor smiling down at the dead baby. For a second, I think I’ll actually escape. But, just as I reach the doorknob with my left hand, I feel his grip on my right wrist. I turn to face him.

He’s calm. He grabs my left wrist with his other hand and holds my arms, now bound, in front of him. His grip is gentle, but when I try to pull away, he tightens it. He shakes his head and clicks his tongue at me. “No, no, don’t do that,” he says quietly. Still, he’s smiling.

I think of the baby’s bruised stomach. My skin is going to look like that. I’m going to take a beating. It will begin as soon as I struggle, and there is no way to escape. I’m caught. It’s going to be torture; I can’t even die to get out of it. I’m terrified.

Fragments + LD 🌸

With Z she is explaining to me she is an aborigines tribes woman and she has to go back to Australia. We are with a tribes man and I look at him or a while - his face is long and slim he has piercings in his nose,ears, neck and maybe other places ...as I do my best to take him in I wake up with his piercing eyes borrowing in to my memory.

With Z again - she wants me to give up my job and go and do a meditation retreat. I say it has to be the right time and that is not now. I show her I am looking after a young boy - he is very undernourished and has tattoos all over his poor skinny little body ~ I hold him close his skin is broken in places with what looks like exma he has had very little care and love and always been in trouble ( a roughe of a character it seems 😕 )realising I have become so very fond of him - like he is my own son - I have only thoughts of wanting to help and love him but others may misunderstand- I hold him close as we skate ( me on skates seems to be a Dream sign I am unsure of using in daily life as I havnt skated in years around laughingly passing by Wonderfull country scenery.

We find my mum and she shows us her plans to build on to her house and I love her ideas -
"your so imaginative " I say and Hug her strongly
I can see us all as a family enjoying her creations of pools and saunas and relaxing sun rooms.

As I walk away I pass a group of 4 DC's sitting chatting - one starts to show me where a bullet went in to his belly and then came out at the back - then he even puts his finger through the front and wiggles it as it comes out the back near his spine!!! I am shocked and look closer - yes there is a hole but no blood or anything .... Is this possible??!! - ha ha ha know what's happening 🌠

" This is a dream - 100% dream " I say Laughing in almost disbelief of the scene of these 4 strange but friendly folk sitting in front of me...

I look again at them as the fact that it's a dream settles in more and more
As I watch the main Guy facing me I see that his head is almost flat and I get carried away looking at his face morphing into different shades and shapes in front of my very eyes - Amazing⭐️
" You are all in my dream - its like you just helped me to realise it! Why did you help me?" I asked the morphing head guy who seemed the most aware of me.
" Can you tell me why are you helping me ?" I asked again intently watching the face maybe a bit too intensely ...

His face morphed finally into space completely and I woke up with the image of his distorted face dissolving into the space it occupied - wow 🌞

I am noticing a dream sign of people's faces... I want to find a way to use this in WL perhaps when I am with people ( I am with folk conversing a lot during my WL for days are generally people occupied whether it be work/social ) Maybe when I am looking at people I can make it a reminder to RRC and RC ⚡️)

Late for work in WL- gotta go🌠