Nazrax

Rambling dream
I'm standing in what I believe to be a Home Depot watching some kind of laser cutting large wooden rounds into doughnut shapes. Each round is around six or eight feet across and about a foot or two thick. They're very rough-cut, and they still have their bark on. The rounds are hanging from a track in an upright position. One at a time, the machinery moves a round in front of a laser, cuts out the center of the round, and moves it onward. Each time, the bright orange laser stabs through the round, moves in a wide circle, and lets the slightly cone-shaped center drop out. As this keeps going on, I watch more closely. Oddly, the later doesn't leave a nice clean cut - the remaining hole is just as rough as the wood itself. I turn my attention to what happens to the scrap pieces and am surprised to see that they fall then seem to dissolve. My wife is standing nearby, and I call her attention to it. After a couple more times I look more closely at what the scrap is falling onto. At first glance, it just looks like a fairly industrial metal table but, looking more closely, I realize that it's supposed to be a replica of the Last Supper: most of the table is empty, but one place setting has a plate of bread and a cup of wine. Even though this is just idolatry - we're not authorized to use religious symbols like this, nor to profane the Lord's Supper - it's clearly having an effect on the wood.

Now I'm sitting at a small table with my wife. I'm still facing the same direction, and she's sitting across from me. A chain-link fence and gate are now standing where the cutting machinery had been. The gate opens, and a police RV drives in and parks. I wonder what's going to happen. Now I see a police officer trying to handcuff a man. He surprises the man and gets one wrist into the cuffs, but the man struggles and holds his arms straight out. Another officer comes over and helps pull the man's arms together behind his back so he can be cuffed. Another young officer comes over to my table and, in a lightning move, cuffs my wife's hands to the table. He's young, friendly, and very apologetic, explaining that they need to keep witnesses to <something> around for questioning. I put my hands on the table to show I'm cooperating and won't fight, but he doesn't cuff me. Instead, on older officer comes over and starts talking to me almost as an equal and asking my opinion on things. I realize I must be the main character. I make a gaff and he assumes I'm just joking and scolds me, telling me to be serious. Now I see the female lead getting ready for a fancy gathering, wearing a fancy blue dress, and somehow I know this is important to the case.

Now I'm watching a commercial for a TV show. The guy talking is the main character, though he's addressing the audience directly, talking about what a fool he gets to be on the next episode. The camera is showing him from the waist up, and behind him is an aerial view of a tropical island in a deep blue sea. He uses a couple of strange terms to refer to himself, referencing some other silly show, but I don't know enough about it to understand the references. Now the camera passes him and starts to zoom in on the island. Eventually the perspective is from ground level. The main character is with a bunch of old guys, and they're all lining up their motorcycles in a small front yard. They've all got some piping hooked up near the backs of their motorcycles to shoot water in the air up behind them as they ride, kind of like a speed boat's rooster tails. Even though they're not riding, they've got them turned on, and they're all getting wet. The main character is looking pretty goofy and has a rather long-suffering look on his face. Now the camera cuts to a dog in the street. It's gotten all wet from the bikes, so it prances around for a while, lays down on its side, and sends a stream of urine high in the air in an arc. Everyone laughs even harder and says the dog won.

Now I'm the main character, and I'm climbing the steps to the house, heading to a party thrown in my honor by a bunch of people I only barely know. I don't really want to go, but I can't very well back out of my own party. I go through the outer door, through a small laundry room, and out into a kitchen. I see my paternal grandparents and instantly know I'm dreaming, since they've been dead for many years. I hug my grandfather, wave to my grandmother, then look at them a bit, enjoying their presence. They both look really (really) old and, though spry, also look very sickly with pale, age-spotted skin. *I decide to try to fly and focus my efforts on soaring into the air. The only thing that happens is a feeling of a slight "shift." Oh well.

Now I "wake up" and find myself in the same living room, but with all the people gone. I remember that my wife and I are house-sitting for friends, and I feel bad about how everything looks. I go hunting for paper towels, but every roll I find - in the kitchen, in the utility room, in the bathroom - has exactly one sheet left. I finally get a grocery plastic bag and a length of toilet paper and return to clean up the mess. I notice that there's a bit of water coming down from the ceiling, but I ignore it for the moment. The toilet paper is single ply stuff, so it doesn't work well, and by the time I'm done it's squashed into something the size of a marble.

Now I hear someone yelling something from the second story. Now there's something about a fish and what a struggle it was to reel it in. I look over and see a strange fish, very flat and angular (as if it were cut out of a piece of wood and painted) sitting on a small table nearby. My wife comes over and I show it to her, explaining how it got here - something about the guy upstairs. Initially, I hadn't thought it had any usable meat on it, but on second thought I think it does.


Monster in town
I'm in an unfurnished house with someone else talking about the monster that's recently invaded the town. We're trying to figure out what to do - maybe hide in a closet, or maybe barricade the doors. Now a police woman is talking to the townspeople, letting them know that the monster has been defeated but that the police have decided that all female officers must quit.

*
Fragment: I'm at a concert. Two guys are singing - The Rock and someone else - and they're having mic problems. The Rock's singing is much better than I'd expected. *