Lucid-schizo-dreamer

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

(...) I meet a girl who is struggling with cancer. She is a concerned that she is getting too thin no matter what she eats. I try to help her recover her self-esteem. Somehow I feel she is redirecting her anger and frustration with being sick, to how she looks. I tell her it's normal to loose weight due to the treatments and the consequent lack of appetite. I tell her about my friend who died of cancer and the things she went through. Not so cheerful, I know, but then I offer to help her with her diet to see if she can get back to the weight where she feels comfortable. She actually gets a bit too fat, but still her frustration continues. One day, I'm taking her to my beach house to relax, but people are being evacuated from the beach because the ocean is a bit rough and also there is a giant shark close to the shore. She decides is the perfect opportunitty to put an end to her life by jumping from my balcony to the ocean. The waves reach the balcony and we risk being dragged by the next wave coming, the shark is just below, but I decide going after her and bringing her in. She calms down and apparently all goes well from then on.
This beach house is amazing, like a glass cube, but not so much privacy unless I keep the curtains close. But on the next day after the storm, I enjoy the radiant sun with all my curtains open and forget about it. Decide to do some workout fully naked. Bad mistake. After a while I realize there's some 2 or 3 guys watching me from a nearby location and having the time of their lives. I feel so embarassed, I grab the first piece of clothing I see around and run away. It is my pijama and when I notice, I'm on the elevator to the outside. Not a well thought decision. I find myself in the middle of a crowd in my pijama.
Then I wake up, but I feel I am lingering between sleep and awakefulness and attempt to WILD. I have the strangest experience, because I start seeing people, I realize, I'm back in the dream, but I am also moving my body on the bed but unlike other times in which this is enough to stop the dreaming, this time I could continue consciously dreaming with my eyes closed, while I was fully awake and moving my body. This has started to happen since I was able to have what it feels like REM during sitting meditation. Somehow it's like I turned on the ability to REM and dream while awake. Or maybe it's called hallucination

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

(...) I'm going through a pile of paper with my writings. I carry it to a meeting with a guy who's working on it with me. As he reviews it, Obama appears on a visit to the place we are - an institute or something. He shakes hands with a few persons and then wants to talk to my colleague. I would like to tell him a few things but my colleague really begs me to keep silent. But as we're introduced, we look into each other's eyes and we duel with our minds. He knows and I know, and I know that he knows and he knows that I know.... In the end I feel incredibly unconfortable. Now he knows who I am, shit!
When he goes away, I fly out to the top of the mountain where I meet my mentor and guide. She tells I am right to be scared, because they will come for me, but that is necessary. They need what I have, but I also carry the key to their destruction and it is time to put that in motion.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


I am watching the events around some kids and their lives. In common, they all attend the same college.
I'm following the life of a very sensible kid, whose father is very though, I think maybe a cop or military. He tries to raise his kid to be tough like him and fearless, so he keeps dragging him to nasty places and situations where the kid freaks out and gets traumatized. As a result, he shuts down and starts hating his father. He sure gets tough, but not the way his father intended to. The once sweet kid is now silent, unpleasant, unresponsive and anti-social.
Then I follow another guy whom nobody seems to know or notice. He dresses a casual suit, seems to be of good families, but he is also messed up. He arrives at the school entrance, takes out a gun from his pocket and shoots himself in the head. No last words, no hesitation.
Then I seem to decide to enter that college and I actively become a character in the dream. I wander around the premises, get to know the kids and I become their colleague.
One day an armed gang enters the school spreading panic. I take refuge in a bathroom nearby with some other people, but three persons of the gang also enter the bathroom, point guns at us and tell us to quiet down. I consider getting out while I still can, but they say we're going to be taken hostage and stay in there for a couple of days locked up with them. I hear indiscriminate shots outside and chaotic running and screaming and realize I have more chances of staying alive if I stay in there. My instinct tells me to accept being their hostage. They have sandwiches and even some blankets to lay on the floor. They make sure we are comfortable, but never explain their intentions.
After a day, I notice that our captors are as nervous as the hostages. I'm the only one still cool and relaxed, so one of the captors asks me how can I stay so cool in the middle of all that. I say something like "panic and stress won't help me at all to stay alive and make the best judgement of the situation". He is impressed and we start talking. He is actually a very nice guy and I start sympathizing with him, although not with their cause.
Another girl hostage asks me later if I understand what their plans are for us. She seems to be confident that they won't kill us. And I tell her "don't fool yourself. we're the backup hostages. they keep us safe here as a safeguard to themselves. but if shit hits the fan, they will kill us to."
As I say this, a guy who seems to be their leader, breaks into the bathroom and seems to be ready to kill us indeed. Before he even has time to blink, I kick him and throw him on the floor and get his gun, but he wears a kind of armour and his only vulnerability is his head. I don't want to kill him, so I hesitate about shooting him in the head. He feels my hesitation and he attacks me back. We fight and he ends up on the ground again, but now he summones a dragon-demon that no one was expecting. Well, the dragon has thick skin, but no armour, so I shoot the dragon. He disappears in thin air. Just like that, the gang seems to have been also dismantled and normality is being restablished elsewhere in the school, with the remaining hostages being freed.

So I am lucid dreaming and decide to use the chance to do a buddhist practice. I invoke Guru Rinpoche and find myself facing a huge wooden door of a palace. I enter a large hall with pillars and a beautiful veranda to an internal patio. I am wondering "oh guru, where are you?", but instead, a female miniature pincher appears to my left, walking through the pillars. She is so cute and lays on the floor, asking for me to pet her, which I do. but then she gets horny and wants me to finger her (!!!) No way! When did this dream lost its course?LOL

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I am having one of those dreams in which I'm in a house, trying to get out, but every door or window just leads to another room. It's becoming opressive and then I realize it must be a dream, so I get lucid and transform the dream. The next window does lead to the outside. With the awareness increasing, I get the usual attacks from my own mind, maybe. It pulls out all the "weapons" at the same time. Everything starts moving really fast, the scenarios around me are constantly shifting, the floor under my feet is never stable, things are being thrown at me from all directions, there's a storm with tornados approaching, then a van full of men in black stops to my left and agents come out to arrest me, the one in the front is agent Smith... Wow, could it be more confusing? I focus on the fact I know I'm dreaming. Agent Smith dissolves into light, the storm gives rise to a sunny sky with fluffy white clouds, the landscape becomes empty and still and in front of me appears a text on a sheet of white paper. It has some strange orange characters on the top of the sheet, that I cannot really read. I think it contains a list of names and my name is on it, near the top. It becomes my center of focus and allows me to just stay aware.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

With a group being threatened by armed men. One is about to rape a girl. I don't accept this. I know I risk being killed, but I decide it's one of those defining moments in which one has to risk its own life, so I attack the rapist and get his gun and use it to shoot all the bad guys. I'm wounded, but alive. A wound in my leg is looking bad. Open and with white pus. I squeeze it to drain it, but I feel something alive inside, like a huge white worm. Disgusted, I rip the wound to try to get it out, but what I find is a tiny white wolf, like an embryo inside my flesh. It gets out and grows to normal size. It's actually beautiful and I feel so blessed!

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I am walking a path up a hill, alongside others. Around us, on the hill, are scattered buildings. I am a visitor and they are students there.
I become semi-lucid when I look at the sky and realize how unreal it looks. The colour is super sharp, the clouds are moving too fast and there's something just mesmerizing about all that. The realization of the dream nature of things plunges me into a state of profound melancholy, bliss and hypnosis. The girl walking by my side says "Oh my god, you look like you are in love!". What??? No, she got it wrong. What I am is hopeless of ever being in love. What I am is ready to let go, because there's nothing holding me back. No hope, no illusions. And I remember Morpheus' quote "You have the look of a man who accepts what he sees because he is expecting to wake up." That's what I am. She doesn't understand.
Anyway, further ahead I see a tree and from the tree top falls a guy who is burning in flames. When he is contorting on the floor, I notice he is a buddhist monk on red and yellow robes. I scream to my friends to go and help him, while I run to one of the buildings to call 911. I find a reception where I make the call, but then I feel I should have helped to stop the fire instead, so I run to the tree again. My friends are there looking puzzled and there's no sign of a burning man anywhere. Instead, there's a couple of westerners, a guy and a girl, sitting under the tree, although they are also wearing the buddhist monastic robes. My friends say I allucinated and go away. The monk boy befriends me. He wants to know what I saw. Then I ask if I could possibly be seing him in the future, but he assures me he would not ever self-immolate. Although he feels just like me, ready to let go, he would not waste this life. He chose to be a very, very sad monk. We feel complete empathy for each other. We hold hands very strongly. I feel his warmth becoming mine. For some reason his hands are incredibly dirty and greasy, but I don't feel disgusted. We just can't let go of each other anymore.

(...) I had fallen asleep at a train station in the dream and when I wake up I am somewhere else and the first person I see to my left is my guru. He is in some sort of public appearance... It is still fuzzy to me what is going on. Or eyes cross but I can't tell if he recognizes me. I look to my right and there is an entourage of lamas and monks. Then he gets up and everybody else does the same. He moves towards me and says "Hi (my name)! I haven't seen you in a while. How are you?". "Oh, you remember me!", "Off course, silly." Then he puts his right hand over my right shoulder and grabs my left wrist with his left hand and walks with me for a while. I feel his warmth and notice my icy hands. While he is asking me questions I cannot help to feel extremely hot and cold at the same time. At first I ignore, but it becomes so extreme I cannot continue the conversation and I wake up . My body is icy cold, but I am completely drenched in sweat.

(...) I am walking through a park when some guy asks me to take pictures of him doing kung fu poses to send to his friends back home. I agree and then three more people join him, apparently part of the same tour group, making poses for the pics. I relish their skills and they introduce me to their master. It's an extremely amiable old chinese man. I tell him I am now learning martial arts in real life, but kenpo not kung fu. He says that's nice and offers to teach me some signature moves from his school. He demonstrates as he attacks me, but he is kind enough to do it gently and instead of hitting me full force he says "bam, now I hit you in the head.", etc. Unlike the kung fu fights I was used to play in my dreams, now the fights feel extremely realistic. Then he asks me to attack him and show what I know. I feel a bit embarassed, but instinctively apply a series of kicks and punches which he defends with ease. He looks amused at my inexperience but not so much with the last kick, which actually surprises him. He says he wasn't expecting that, since it is a more advanced move. I said I had learned it already and then he exchanges some remarks with another chinese guy. He says that they know the move but teach a version of it to only the more advanced students."

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I am part of an expedition which found some amazing old ruins on a cave. Some of the men turn against me and a trusted friend and want me to find and give them some artefact which can control that place. I do not cooperate and they start shooting. I hide behind a vertical metallic sarcophagus and as I avoid the bullets, I recognize the carved shapes on the sarcophagus as instructions to activate some mechanism to get the artifact. I need to put back in it the head of the person whose body was originally inside it, but where is the head? With the shooting, there is some collapse of the cave, which opens a line to an area of plants in which I take cover. In the middle of the plants are several mummified heads. I find the right one, which belonged to some king. I take it and put it inside the sarcophagus. In exchange, from a hidden door in the sarcophagus comes a mirror, surrounded by pearls. I hide it in my clothes and I run to an exit. Meanwhile the shooting continues and they found a way through the debris to me. Now the cave is really collapsing and as I run towards the exit, I see secret chambers with treasures opening up. I still have time to pick up another jewel, a necklace with a pendent, which is on a pedestal at the entrance of a chamber. And I escape.
In the nearest town, my friend, whom I thought had died, surprises me and tells me the bad guys are still after us and his plan to go away. But it's too late, we're surrounded by them and they tell me to hand over the necklace, which they saw me taking and think is the artefact they want. I pretend I don't want to but then give it to them and they go away all happy. Then I tell my friend they took the wrong thing and he smiles.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I am in Rome for a one day stop while travelling. I decide to go look for a strange place I'm not sure I have ever been or simply dreamt of. I enter a back alley and go through some L turns until I enter a dead end street and there it is: the red brick building with the tall windows on the 1st floor and the open arches on the ground floor. Sparks over my head, heavy machinery passing by on rails. I know it so well, yet I am not sure I have been here before. It's like Wonka's chocolate factory, but with no chocolate. Here it is created the structure of dreams. The entire factory is a puzzle of rooms connected to each other in no logical order of geometry. I'm welcomed here as an old visitor and taken on a tour through the new creations of the factory. Increbidle animals crawling up the walls, the colours of the rainbow, unspeakable wonders all over. I'm left alone to explore the levels. There is no end, no exit, I feel a hint of panic but I immediately put it away. I could dwell in this dream world forever.
Then I'm in a room with a broken ceiling through which I climb outside. Then a road, which I follow, but an earthquake tears it open. A car is thrown at me. I duck at a ditch, but another car is thrown at me. I duck again. It passes over my head. Then increasingly bigger machines are thrown at me, a train, a helicopter, a plane which falls from the sky. They are being thrown at me, mercilessly. I wake up.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I am in Iowa. It doesn't look like Iowa at all, more like a rural village in the north of Portugal, with small stone houses and rough stone paved streets, but still I know it is in Iowa. Around the village there's miles and miles of corn fields and it's what people do for a living here. I am staying with a very noce family and the lady is telling me about how they find it so beautiful, but I am a destroyer of illusions and I say large industrial monoculture of GMO corn is not a beautiful sight, no matter how golden it looks. But they don't feel ofended. It's like they never even thought about it in a different angle and they want to know more about my point if view.
Eventually a storm at distance starts making a noise and we go look through the window and we see incredible pink clouds and a shower of lightnings. We go outside to see it better, because that is actually beautiful, but the storm surprises us and lightnings start to hit the village without a warning. Everybody panics and runs around. I want to go back in the house, but the lightnings almost seem intelligent and hit people who run down the road. But we manage to go inside. We watch the lightnings up close through the window, but they look more like flames than electrical discharges.
The storm eventually dissipates and then I'm invited to a night out in the capital. There's a disctrict that looks like Bairro Alto in Lisbon and there's a rave party out in the streets and people are dressed in costumes or just extravagant outfits. I feel melancholic and numb. I sit down on a stone slab - other people are dancing on top of other stones which seem to be part of some modern sculpture - and a friend sits by my side, puts her arm around my shoulders and asks what's going on. I start crying and I say I'm hopelessly in love, always have been and that I keep hoping to see his face in the crowd. She doesn't know what to say. I get up and decide to dance into a trance until I feel even number.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I am somewhere in North America, for some kind of conference or work camp. I am in the middle of a meeting or workshop when the moderator is called outside. When she returns she looks seriously depressed. She just says we're all free to go home. We ask why, what happened and she says "It's not official, so I shouldn't be saying this, but it seems a deadly virus is spreading fast through the world and soon the authorities will tell people to stay home, so I'm letting you go ahead. Goodbye and god bless you."
It all seems far fetched but as I walk by a lake with a colleague, in silence, we both feel it's real and it's happening. I say to her that it would have been better to be hit by an asteroid, becuase it would be quicker and less painful, but then I regret and say it's better this way, because at least it's only humans that die and the rest of the life on the planet can thrive when we're gone or nearly extinct. At the end of this park we're crossing, we arrive in the city and it seems that people are in the dark about what's going on. The subway is closed, there are no buses running, but nobody explained to people why.
I wonder how I can go back home in another continent. For sure they already closed the airports to, before giving the news and the panic spreads. I panic for a second and then feel rested that at least my family back home can stay indoors for weeks or months due to the food and water reserves I prepared for them. I'm happy that they have a chance of survival.
Me and my friend are stuck in this city. We watch the riots as the news are announced and it's every man for itself. We watch as former drug dealers are now selling suspicious packages of a fungus, claiming it's a vaccine against the disease. I comment to my friend that if some people survive, the history will recall that a huge percentage of deaths was not due to the disease but to the ignorants who ate that thing. We watch as the authorities warn about a mandatory curfew. All those who don't have a home, are being taken to camps. We think that's bad, because the chance of getting sick in the middle of thousands of people is greater than on our own.
We find shelter at some technical installations of a municipal swimming pool. It's warm and inconspicuous and can be locked from the inside.
But some night maybe someone tipped us of because a group of police or military come by, trying to open the door. There is a small hole on a wall and we furiously scratch it to make it large enough to pass through it. Like in the Matrix, we then pass into the walls and hide there very still. They manage to break the lock and they point their flashlights all over but luckily they miss the hole on the wall and they move along.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

On a cruise ship that gets stranded near the shore of an island. The captain and crew tell people not to leave the ship until we're rescued, but I feel that a storm is coming and it's dangerous to stay in the ship, so I leave with some close friends. The others are hit by the storm and of course the ship sinks and many die. But some manage to reach the island and they bring some sort of curse with them. As they set foot on the island, it turns into a desert. As I and my friends struggle to cross this desert, we see the others maybe a mile away behind us, being engulfed by a grasshoper cloud. We run to escape the bugs and I fall over a huge slab partially cover by sand, which has the map of the earth carved on. As I focus on a particular spot on that map, I feel pulled into a vortex and I fall, fall, fall into the darkness. I find myself in a dark place inside my head, I feel my "real" body outside and I realize I'm sleeping. I almost wake up but I hang in there and very faint shapes start to form. I seem to wander through a landscape as seen through a scanning microscope. I see microscopic life forms, very small seeds germinating, microbes, the detail of the "ground" with nanometric resolution. Amazing.
Then I feel a force pulling me up and I rise, rise, rise. The darkness gives place to a white light that becomes brighter and brighter. I tumble through the light and then I am laid o a solid surface. I look around and I'm surrounded by ducks, a goose, water spouts, bits of grass, mud, sheep... I turn my head and behind me is a brown bear. I get scared and jump, but he seems to be more afraid and runs to the opposite direction. Then I realize there are animals of all species around me, herbivores and carnivores, all gathered, as waiting for something. I look beyond them and I see we're in the middle of some kind of square in a village, with an interesting mix of European style traditional buildings. I also spot some human beings in the distance, but before I contact them, I'm surrounded by three guys who don't seem to want to sing Kumbaya. They grab me and I use some kenpo moves in self-defense. Usually I use my dream kung fu skills, but this time I consciently applied the lessons from my real life training and it worked (I clearly notice that my left side is my weakness and that I must work it.) Also, the dudes didn't count on my ability to fly. I fly up, up, up, and the darkness descends upon me again. Everything is black, except for a faint blueish light from a window to my left. Something touches my back. A black cat makes an appearance and guides me through what seems to be a house at night. He climbs up some furniture and invites me to follow him, until we reach a door near the ceiling, which could be a door to an attic, maybe. I hear voices and lights turn up. Some guys are entering the room and I feel urgency in leaving, so I go through the door and I wake up.

I get up from the couch, feeling so sleepy and my mom is standing at the door looking at me, commenting that I slept over today. "Yeah, I was so tired." But something doesn't add up and I do a RC. I am still dreaming. I think about using the opportunity but I feel the vortex sucking me again and I wake up.
I did overslept and my mom had indeed entered the house, but she left when she realized I was sleeping.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I'm with 2 girl friends at some otherworldly scenario, of giant white sand dunes and an eerie grey sky. There is no one and no sound and we feel like floating on clouds. It's hard to describe the feeling.
We climb to a dune trying to get a view of what's around but there's even higher dunes surrounding us. They give up and decide to stay in a valley but I feel energized enough to climb to the highest dune around. They look tired and do not follow me. After I reach the top, I still only see more dunes across the horizon, but in the distance, the sky has some weird clouds coming in our direction. When they are closer, lightning starts and 5 or 6 tornados form and I'm like "not again!!!" I scream to my friends to take cover because we're gonna be hit, but when I look at it again, I realize the tornados are the least of our problems. A giant tsunami just appeared out of nowhere and is covering even the highest dunes. It's so fast I only have time to say "f*ck!". I am engulfed by the gigantic mass of water and I say goodbye to life. After a few tumbles on the giant waves, I realize I'm not dead. I don't get fully lucid, but I'm a bit aware of the nature of the experience.
I lay down on the sand, my friends are gone and then I'm surrounded by 10 persons who start throwing ninja knives at me. I only have something like a piece of wood I found on the floor, to defend myself and I throw back the knives at them. I still get some bad cuts, but I keep on fighting until they eventually stop attacking me and retreat. I'm tired, injured and with my clother torn apart. Then my sensei appears and says "Well done, but can you do that in sexy?". I think to myself "What???" Then he hands me a box with what appears to be blue fabric. I pick it up and it's some kind of long tunic. He disappears again, I dress it up and start walking around. I find a rudimentar house and he is sitting on a chair outside. I pull up a chair, sit down, cross my legs and say "Yes, I can do it sexy. And I'm not wearing any underwear." His concentration flicks for a moment and I throw a ninja knife at him. He escapes it, but barely and looks at me like saying "You got it!".

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I'm hiking some forested mountains with a group of some 10 people. It's almost dark and we feel a bit lost. We just descended from a mountain and we arrived at a clearing. There's a path going through another mountain but we're not sure we can go across before it's dark. Some want to go back, others are sure there's a village just minutes on the second path, so in the end we camp at the clearing. Soon after it gets dark, we're surrounded by some strange fellas. Their leader kinda hypnotizes us, telling us we're we're all going to a better place, full of love. I only regain some awareness when we're on board of some kind of flying ship. I can see we're flying over the forest, which strangely has the shape of a heart. I guess I'm hallucinating due to the mind control. I fight back and they realize I'm becoming aware. So, two men hold me down and one stitches my mouth with a needle and a thread, while another tries to stitch my hands to my seat. I fight the pain by realizing this is but a dream and soon it doesn't hurt a thing, although I feel it.
Then some gap in my memory, but later on I am with the whole group behind me, we've escaped to the nearest town.
We hide at some underground tunnels under a market, but in the morning we have to go, because there's a grid over our heads and in the daylight we can be seen by those above us. But when we try to get out, we see groups of men in black that we immediately know belong to that gang and we're sure they are looking for us. I suggest we must split up because together there's no way we can escape. But some don't want to. While we discuss strategies, the men in black open the entrance to
the underground and we run for our lives. I escape into the crowd, but some of them are caught.