Side Notes
Back in Stettler. I've been given 2 new prayers. One for the kindness of Jamie's heart. And 2: to pray that she finds me. My 15 minute prayer list got longer. Jamie 1 A dream of her standing behind a counter looking zoned out. Not responding to me. Uh oh. That hasn't happened in a while. Jesus A dream of Jesus hugging my brother. My brother is like the most anti Christian guy I know. Also why my family knows nothing about my faith. My family is toxic enough without adding extra things they could traumatize me with. Running I was in a field with a woman. Some guy, David, ran past us at super speed. I ran up a hill after him. The woman following behind me stopped from being tired. I kept going up but the path got way too steep. I stopped too. I think the woman was Jamie. Jamie again Jamie was with me outside by a building. I had very low awareness. She was trying to convince me that some tall British woman with glasses should be my girlfriend. She suggested that I write a letter to her. I reluctantly did. Gave the letter to the woman and ran away. Me and Jamie followed the woman to a bar. Jamie convinced me to approach her again. I did with some light banter but the woman was with two other men. She then implied with a joke that maybe she would have 3 dicks in her tonight instead of two... Okay I pretended to be into that and promptly walked away. I went outside and Jamie was there. She got in front of me. I was behind her. We were in an embrace we seemed to be having sex as we were both moaning. But I couldn't feel anything. She abruptly stopped after a minute and left. Sigh: please no more loyalty tests. Testing in a dream is inaccurate because in a lot of dreams I lack considerable awareness. Bible says he who finds a wife finds a good thing. It says nothing about dating multiple woman or finding a girlfriend . Jesus already called on me to think of Jamie as exactly how I would a wife. Even though it hasn't happened yet. So that's the position I'm in and I'm not backing down. Jamie 3 I was in a fast food restaurant. Jamie was working the counter. I was looking at the menu when a woman from the group behind me went around me and went to where Jamie was standing and tried to order. Jamie scolded the woman and said to wait in line until I had ordered.
Back in Stettler. Had barely any dreams for a couple days. I had lots of non lucids but I forgot many details. Jamie 1 Just Jamie standing on a road by a mountain or something, she was looking at me and said, " I'm a lesbian now." And smirked as if I might like it or hate it. Really? This again? Safe to say as usual if I dream of her like this it's because of some demon interference or influence. In the voice we've had our issues lately but we keep pushing through. I wake up and pray for Jesus to help us with the dream problems.. Jesus Jesus is with us but he looks annoyed with us. Maybe jokingly? Not sure. Work I was somewhere with people and ran into the lady who runs out of the box. Just a brief conversation with me saying I'd like to be on call again. Jamie 2 I was walking with Jamie by some random buildings we seemed back to normal. I was talking but I kept messing up my words. Jamie questioned me about what I said. I told her when I'm tired I sometimes mess up my words. Or when I'm nervous. Hopefully the dreams improve.
Just a couple dreams. Been working long days. Jamie I was at a supper table with Jamie and some older woman. Her mother. Jamie was quiet but seemed to be looking at everything I was doing and she was smiling every time I said something. I was getting up a few times to get something from the cupboard? I had a small half dried piece of drywall mud. It sounded like it was chiming or ringing. I said I thought the sound was like hearing partials when tuning unisons on a piano. I was asked to explain what partials were. A partial is a harmonic that a note hits. There's an octave partial, a fifth, second octave and so on. Why tuning pianos is so hard is that good tuners tune unison s to hit at least 4 partials. If the 2 strings sound pure but the partials are wavering, it's not pure. I was explaining this when the dream ended. Scary house I was driving with Scott and Yves. The guys who ripped me of when working for them last month. We were heading from Canmore. There was a turn off with a big snow drift. They took the exit. I was panicking that we were going to slide off the road. But we didn't. We seemed to be following a blind couple in a station wagon. The road wound up a mountain. We came to a big house. The guys said it was abandoned and that we were going to spend the night there. The blind couple was there along with other people who kept coming and going. I was alone in a room. I kept finding pictures of normal looking people. But after a few seconds a demon face would appear in the picture and a creepy voice would speak. This happened a few times. I'm glad the Jamie dreams are consistent.
Lots of dreams. not a lot of time to type. I go back to stettler tomorrow for 10 hour shifts. I have wed and thurs off. week off every 3rd week. Lucid Vague, low level lucid. I was in a building with lots of people. I seemed to waste time telling them it's a dream. I don't know why I keep doing that. Lucids are frustrating. They are too short for me. Attempts to stabilize seem to make it worse. dad Dream where my dad was sleeping somewhere strange but wanted a hug before bed. I obliged. food twist I was in my kitchen serving some spaghetti. I dug down in the bowl it was in but underneath was mac and cheese... ok strange combo. I once ate a burger restaurant that had a mac and cheese burger. I literally had to try it. It was interesting but good. Jamie break up I woke up in the middle of the night. The jamie voice kept saying she wants to break up. (We both seem to get voices like that, upon waking. We just push through and ignore them. A simple prayer about voices in my head seems to make it stop.) The voice transitioned to a dream. Jamie was holding a blue ATM card, presumably from ATB and said that we were breaking up. She was trying to bend the card until it broke. Next dreams seemed to indicate whatever was wrong had been solved somehow. Kittens I had a FA. In my room were lots of different kittens wandering in and out of my room. One had a really flat face. Others were of the same color. I noticed a baby skunk. I turned away. A woman's voice said it was cute. I looked and saw the skunk run away. The woman had brown hair. I felt it was somehow both Jamie and Asuka merged into one. I said to keep it away from my dog. He's already been skunked twice... Construction I was in a big place under construction. The layout made no sense. Young people 16-20s were working there. There was a bridge by a tricky stairwell... I left and went back to it but the people made the bridge into something else... Very hard to describe dream. Serpents or dragons. Jamie? I was a giant flying thing. like a flying dragon or serpent. (Very rarely dream about this form.) There were other beings around kind of like me but different. We were playing a game or something. by an ocean ther was a large cave with something inside. I was to collect what was in the cave and bring it back somewhere. The other flying dragon things were supposed to stop me. I went right under the water and waited for one to fly past the cave and away a distance. It seemed to but before I could move. It latched onto me from above. It was gentle, not harmful or threatening. We flew out of the water. I got up above it and playfully held it. It looked at me and smiled. The being had very light grey eyes that seemed familiar. I said, "Oh I could never harm you. you are so friendly." or something. After thinking I think it was Jamie. That means she was in a dragon flying form in dreams as well? Pillar some weird dream about me and some woman building a pillar with metal or something. Not sure exactly what was going on.
Had a panic moment when DV wasn't loading for a bit... Jamie 1 Not pg 13... Me and Jamie were watching porn.... Jamie excitely pointed at the screen at something I won't mention. Oh well. Weather we are being good or getting into trouble as long as "we're together". Jamie 2 I'm not in the dream. Jamie is with some woman. They are... I won't mention. But jamie abruptly cuts the woman off and leaves quickly and angrily. I think the voice was telling me something like this. Other random dreams I can't seem to recall much. One was work related. I was working with a ladder but the ladder went away? not sure. I was hoping the more affectionate dreams can come back. Like hugging, hand holding, and kissing. BTW everyone is working out of town but me until next week. If Jamie wants to do one of her drive by stuff on me... or even talk to me. These next few days are a great time. I'll be watching!!! Let's try to be good from now on.
Jamie 1 Just a flash of Jamie looking at me from somewhere. couldn't malke out much details. I had this flash while praying very tired. Jamie 2 I was at a bar or something. Jamie was working there. My home animals were there. I was petting a black cat who seemed larger than normal. My dog was also there. Jamie was behind a bar working away, she didn't mind that I was there. ??? Some guy I barely know A, was looking at me strangely from an above place. Like he was watching me go through my current dream. Jamie 3 I was in a bedroom with Jamie. There was no light on. There were a bunch of boxes or something. We were moving them out of the way. Jamie 4 Just a flash of me and Jamie walking into a courthouse during the daytime. I think the secret to more Jamie dreams is imagining I'm holding her in my be while I talk to her voice. We both seem to enjoy imagining a few different scenarios. and there still is a sensation, like we are both doing so with some spirit body???
Weather is finally decent. Maybe Jamie will start her drive bys again? I'll be watching. Jamie Jamie hands me a bagel and cream cheese. Actually, I remember getting that with her through a drive thru once. WTF Longer dream that I can't recall. Only part I remember is that me and my dad were watching something on a computer monitor. One of those curved ones. There were ghastly women who were naked... but they were half dead. They were showing really gross things on the screen. Vibe was: creepy, scary, disturbing. Not much else to report....
Been trying melatonin chewables.... they taste good but not helping much. Jamie Only dream I seem to recall with Jamie in it. I was starting work at a new factory or warehouse job or something. Jamie was there, also a new hire. We are on lunch break or something. I'm at a table and I look at another table and see Jamie is sitting with some woman. The woman turns her head right around to look my way and turns back after a second. They were talking about me? After work I'm following Jamioe home. We are walking. I go up a street on a hill to not be so obvious. (IRL I would never stalk anyone.) The streets look like the ones on GTA5 (Been grinding that game online, taking a break from Cringenight). After that my memory fades. I have a conversation about the dream with Her voice. She said that she was telling the woman in the dream that I'm her boyfriend. What? I was hanging around a guy I used to hang around with... Another J. he said him and his family were moving to texas or something. That's all. I hope I have more Jamie dreams.
Jamie voice seemed to be splitting after my last entry. Wasn't sure why. Of course I meant she's more than welcome to come to my door and ask for me. I simply meant other options as suggestions for whatever she feels comfortable with. Maybe she was upset over my unwillingness to reach out first. Even though I already did a few times. She never responded. If my best message to her still isn't good enough for her. No further attempts are necessary. I argued with her voice on this early this morning about this very thing. She admitted: It's unreasonable to expect you reach to me, if I don't respond. Exactly right! This entirely changes if she begins to talk to me and let's me know that further communication is okay. I'm ready to step up then. Dreams: 2 nights ago. Jamie 1 (Can't use colors because I can't get posting entries here to work properly on PC or mobile. What gives DV? What gives?) I dreamed Jamie was working construction with me or something. I was climbing up some scaffold or something. Jamie was climbing to but she was surrounded by wooden ramps and walls they were also moving very fast. I told her that's not necessary, we're simply here to work. Fortnite again? Jamie 2 She was with me in a house? We kept flying around but instead of talking , we kept leaving notes for one another. Jamie 3 I was with Jamie in a city. She had a fancy blue car. She pushed a button and it started changing into a more fancy car or something. She laughed and asked if I liked it? When I woke up. I kinda split on that. She seemed like her careless and grandiose self of which I have very bad memories of. I recall her being quite hurtful when she was like that. Jamie 4 I was walking on a residential street. I was eating a sandwich. It had some meat and a shitload of mayonnaise. It was messy. I don't recall liking it too much. Woke up and the voice said she made me pastrami on rye? Oops I was supposed to like it. Sorry. This whole entry seems negative. So I'll end on some positive notes. Pets I woke up on top of a bunk bed. There were tiny goats flying up to me and I was petting them. Also the Jamie voice wanted me to confirm some of the jokes we say to one another. Many months ago I was trying to cheer up her voice by saying, " I believe in the good person inside of you." She responded, " You are the good person inside of me." Lol. Read into that however you like. It's been a running joke ever since. I hope next dreams are loving and affectionate. These holidays were more moody than what I would have liked.
3 nights and only a flash of a fragment about Jamie... Can't recall the first night. During the day The Jesus voice indicate that Jamie was getting into something that she shouldn't. The biggest hint is that she was looking at things she shouldn't (IYKYK. I've had struggles with that as well... from time to time). Lucid but no cigar I was in a building with some people. couches in a corner. I became lucid but the dream started blacking out. I held on somehow. I said I wanted to go to Jamie's dream. I wound up in a psychedelic tunnel space. I kept floating through it trying to find Jamie. One tunnel just led to another of different colors. I went through 3 or so. Then my memory fades. Kinda felt like I was stuck in the Dr. Who title screen if you know what I mean. What? A dream where Kurt Cobain was in the black space. He had a guitar and was strumming it. He sang, "A lemonade alright, No Chick-Fil_A sauce." In a sing song voice. He looked pissed off that he was singing it and walked away. Funny. I really hope that doesn't get stuck in my head again. Flash A flash of Jamie naked with some woman... Um okay. I really wish I would stop dreaming about that. I had trouble with the Jamie voice this morning. She said she was stupid? I asked what it was about. I had 4 different Jamie voices give me 4 different answers... I was like, "Well, whatever you did. I'm not finding you in dreams lately and right now the continuity of hearing your voice is breaking down. So maybe give it a rest." Literally hasn't been that bad in months. (I'm not all blaming the lack of dreams on her. I have a tough time recalling things sometimes. It's also very hard to dream about the same thing continuously for such a long time. Might be why I keep seeing Jamie as different people, but I can tell who she is by her behavior) Her voice seemed down today, almost guilty or regretful. I did some early prayers already because she asked.
Last night had lots of dreams. not sure if I'm remembering them all. New Dexter series on paramount+ . Loved the first episode, Use to watch the Original with my cousin who passed a few years ago. Jamie 1 An HH flash of me walking in bowden at night. Jamie drives past me while looking at me. She smiles. The voice get's all excited when I woke up. "I saw you." She said. Note: when I see her in a Real life "Drive by." Her voice will often say, "I saw you!" Jamie 2 Another HH flash We're in the plack space. Jamie brings me a box of doughnuts. Yup. I agree. Best way to keep me from getting Hangry and splitting is to brings snacks. (No dried fruit or anything. Pure chocolate and sugar junk is good.) Wrong girlfriend I walked past Jessica in a dream. for some reason I thought she was Jamie. I acted all friendly but the girl wasn't having it. She said something like, "I didn't do anything with you because you didn't take any initiative." I woke up and asked the Jamie voice about the dream. She said that wasn't her in the dream. As for the initiative thing, we've already covered that - I'm just dense, and can't tell if any flirting is serious or not, leaving me to usually shrug any hints off or miss them altogether. Direct approach is what works best on me. Jamie confusion? I was in a flying car... might have been semi lucid at one point. I had a phone or tablet display in the middle of the dashboard. It was a message from Jamie? but it said: Joanne. I landed at the house. got out. A girl that looked like Jamie started kissing me. We started really getting into it... like really getting into it. In the back of my ming I couldn't get the name: Joanne out of my mind. I still wasn't sure if this was Jamie. The Jamie voice in my head said, "Robert..." as if to ask WTF I was doing. We kept kissing. I checked with the voice when awake. Apperently Jamie remembered kissing too. Not sure what happened there. Driving A dream where I was driving a motorbike in calgary. My brother was there or something. I went to Crowchild, but it was these big hills... and it was snowing. I was really nervous to drive it.
Hardly any recall. The conversations with the voice seemed distant during the days. Mainly because I usually spend hours lost in things that occupy my full attention. The Jamie voice was complaining about it... I think... Today. Anyway we still seem to connect well at night. I haven't been waking up as much in the middle of the night. But at night time it's a normal routine of prayers and trying to sense one another in spirit. I had a dream like vision that seemed like a microdream with Jamie in it. But I can't recall what it was about. Jamie I was somewhere. Maybe in a house. There was a woman there. The lighting wasn't great so I couldn't see her. She said she was my girlfriend. I said, that's impossible, I already have a girlfriend and her name is: Jamie. The woman said that SHE is Jamie. And I was like Nuh-Uh. You don't look like Jamie. I have a picture of us right here. I look at the picture and I see a man with glasses.. but it's not me. His arm is around his girlfriend. She has Jamie's hair.. but not the same face. Also wearing glasses. I was about to tell the woman that it's the wrong picture... But I woke up. I guess I'm still not seeing Jamie as herself... No wonder she doesn't show up as often... That must be frustrating. What? A random dream where I had to hold a giant white thing to fly around. I was trying to beat another guy with a flying thing... I couldn't fly certain areas because I kept running into powerlines? Um okay.
Hardly sensing Jamie at all in these dreams. I miss last February when it was multiple dreams per night. Jamie 1 I was with Jamie in a fortnite game... Ugh. Just remember us by a bridge and talking. Jamie 2 Just remember Jamie hanging with me and my brother? Not sure. We were walking through some woods and I saw shape of smoke in the form of an old lady. It was just frozen there. We went into a cave or something to retrieve something. When we got out. The smoke form was still there. It actually changed into an old lady who looked like a witch. We all got startled and ran. The man argued with me saying the old woman wasn't there before we entered the cave. I said I clearly saw her smoke shape before we entered. Fromville I was in a giant house with the Donna character in the From show. I was exploring a basement which was huge. It was like another in the basement. I go through many rooms and hallways. Donna enters through a hidden door. I comment on how big the basement is. She says, Yes that the upstairs is gigantic as well. There's so much there that Dale has never been downstairs. What Another dream where I break into someone's house that is a previous customer of my dad's. They don't seem to mind however. I see they have a piano, but the woman went with another piano tuner. I've been doing 1-2 piano's a month now. Wish it was several a week. I hope the Jamie dreams increase.
Two nights in a row and not much on Jamie. I had some interesting happenings with her head voice. One night she asked why I ran away in the parking lot. I remembered and I split on it for a few minutes. The answer I gave was 1. She stood me up. 2. She said something really mean. After I calmed down I heard The Jesus voice said it was time for us to leave the past in the past. Had some HH of some one playing the piano. It was the first part of Rachmaninov's 3rd piano Concerto, Ossia Cadenza https://youtu.be/Bhj7hunyVjw?si=ak4Yh0PkYGJ0EAXR Had something like HH flashes but not dream like at all. First was me and Jamie making love, her on top. Second was I was in a room. Night time and no lights except for the glow of a TV. Jamie was on the other end of the couch, staring at me like a zombie. Her eyes glowed from the TV reflection. Che opened her mouth wide with a blank stare and bugs began crawling out of her mouth... The Jamie voice asked what that was. We talked and apparently she saw the same thing... But it was me all zombied out. Jamie Just a flash of me driving a beat up brown, minivan. Jamie got inside and she looked really happy to see me all smiling. Good. House I was wandering through a very large house with tons of people living inside it. In some sections the people were dangerous. The house was so big it was like a small city...
Jamie voice was saying, how she likes our sweet talk especially late at night and the mornings. Yes, it's really me. I'v, also pondered how sometimes - when I have Her drive by sightings... a dream sometimes follows where she is crying in a vehicle. I do appreciate her trying to get nearer to me and hopefully trying to validate my strange "Telepathic" experiences with her. But, be safe. Don't push too hard. If we seriously talk again (hopefully accompanied by a long hug.) It's going to be somewhat emotionally rocky anyway. Just please be safe and stable as can be. Not much from two nights but I had one night with contrasting Jamie dreams. Jamie 1 Before the dream, I fell asleep after briefly watching a UFO documentary on Netflix. (I don't usually watch those, but this one was about Budd Hopkins, I use to read his books as a tween) In the dream. I was watching a Documentary about Jamie. The guy was like, "Is she really who she says she is?" and he claimed like.... ancient egyptians was talking about her or something in pyramids. The dream changed to me chasing Jamie in a big city like T.O. But she was pretending she didn't know me. She was going to parties... lots of drugs and Drama with some guy. I saw her crying in front of him. The documentary guy was in my head, and I was like, "Yeah, I don't recognize this person at all." I woke up and checked if the Jamie voice was there (Sometimes there are periods after sleep where she is silent and I assume she is sleeping.). I was like, "Wow what was with that dream? It was like I didn't exist." After some hesitation she said, "Yes... That was me having a really bad episode." I prayed that I get better dreams about her with holding hands... affection etc. Jamie 2 I'm sitting on a sectional couch in front of a TV. I'm not even sure If I am watching anything. Jamie sits beside me. I'm astounded such a beautiful girl would even sit beside me. We seem to watch it together. I notice she rested her left arm beside me. I didn't want to be too presumptuous so I laid my right arm over hers. After a moment she took my hand. This part felt... So real. I could see and feel our fingers interlocking. We started trying to lay together. I'm not sure if she was squeezing me too hard but I flt panic and got up (I don't mind big hugs but I have a problem if people squeeze to hard, like Elmyra from looney tunes). So, we tried cuddling another way. But after a moment she wasn't having that either. She got up and started pulling out the foot rest and trying to turn it into a Hide-a-bed. But I woke up as she was doing it. I found this dream very funny. We are both so awkward trying to figure out what works best.