Choi's Journey of the Conscious Mind

[COLOR="red"]Lucid[/COLOR]
[COLOR="blue"]Dream[/COLOR]
[COLOR="silver"]Thoughts[/COLOR]
[COLOR="lightblue"]Hypnagogic[/COLOR]

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[COLOR="silver"]I have been trying to stay aware from the moment that I go to sleep to the moment where I have to get up.
I know it is impossible, but if you don't have high goals, you will not get anywhere.
I had read about different meditation techniques and I learned that I am supposed to have a special posture.
So when I went to bed I sat in a lotus position haha. I started to repeat a mantra in my head to keep my mind awake.
I felt my body getting numbed and even some small vibrations, and this was a sign that I was getting completely relaxed.
Later on I got aware of how uncomfortable my body was and that I was boored, and I gave up.
I switched to a more comfortable sleeping posture and I fell asleep.[/COLOR]

[COLOR="blue"]I had a scary dream (but not a nightmare) about a man with a gun telling me to kill his wife. I were in a strange house and his wife were in the basement and she didn't know I was there. The man gave me a knife and told me to koll her or he would kill me "and don't try anything tricky" he said. The dream felt real, but I never realised it was a dream. I went down and everything was going in slowmotion and I tried to figure out a way to escape. There was no other way out, but I went down and throw the knife on a sofa and did a schh-sign to the woman and made her understand that her husband was dangerous. I grabbed her hand and I told her to scream like she was getting stabbed. Then we ran as fast as we could upstairs and pushed the door open. The man stood right behind the door, so he fell and dropped his gun. We ran upstairs and for some weird reason the topfloor looked like my real house. (I have often had dreams about me climbing out from my house)
So in this dream I did just that. I opened the windows and stepped out on a small roof. We escaped...[/COLOR]

[COLOR="silver"]I then woke up with a frightned feeling, but it wasn't a nightmare even if it was scary. Because I felt more like an adventure, a movie that you are involved in. But it still felt real. I then grabbed my Iphone and googled on "boored while meditating. And I read that booredoom is just a condition, something to aknowledge while having it, just be aware of it and it will go away. Just like any other thought. I thought "To make your mind believe that you have fall asleep, you have to lay completely still". I and thought "Why doesn't the paralyses Stephen Hawking lucid dream every night then? I thought about this while I was meditating and realised that it's all in the mind! Be aware of your thoughts and you will be aware when they become a dream. I then tried a weird MUSIC-WILD technique. Because if you only lay completely still and remain awake then you will be completely aware, pure awareness. So I put on some low volume music and lay completely still, but I thought the lyrics to each song in my head.[/COLOR]

[COLOR="blue"]Suddenly I was standing in a Burger king restaurant with my friend. I heard the music in the background, but I didn't realised that I was dreaming. My friend told me to have his cellphone while he was getting food. Some men with a scary attitude watched me receive his cellphone, but then they ignored me. I then started to hear Muse - Starlight in my dream. And I thought "Ah.. I forgot to turn off Spotify on my iphone". Then my friend got back and I gave him his cellphone.[/COLOR]

[COLOR="silver"]When I woke up I saw that the Muse - Starlight wasn't even in the playlist I had listened to! This was a weird realisation. I started to reflect over the fact that I did hear my music in the dream, although it was exhausted when I woke up because the music was annoying. But I remembered on what track I had fell asleep and on what track I woke up on.
So what if I set a mp3 file with my voice telling me stuff like "All that you see now is a dream, look at your hands! Whatever you might think now it doesn't matter just look at your hands!!" Would that make me lucid? It would work like a WILD-EILD.
I might try something like that someday.[/COLOR]

[COLOR="silver"]Then I did a meditation attempt, and I lay there really long and I never gave up, the only thing that made me stop was that my parents called me up for breakfast. I did swallow alot of saliva from time to time, so that may be the reason to why no hypnagogic imagery appeared. But I googled on that too and the solutions was to let the tongue rest on the front teeth in the top of the mouth. It was either this or swallow a dozen of times. So I will try this tonight. But I will do a meditation session on the day too to test this technique out.

Edit: I just meditated aware for 20 minutes! I set an alarm and the first 5 minutes was hard, but then I felt my mind getting calm, hard to explain, but the important thing was that I NEVER felt the urge to swallow.
It felt like I had only been sitting there for 5 minutes, but I was aware the whole time.
I experienced the time as faster somehow. Conscious sleep here I come![/COLOR]

[COLOR="silver"]Ok it's day time now and I am going to meditate and I am going to try to do this for an hour now. I'll write my result when I am done.[/COLOR]

[COLOR="silver"]I just got a new personal record (meditating for one hour) I was stupid and thought that I was in sleep paralysis, but as I allways have told myself, if you are in sleep paralysis you will notice it, because your body will either vibrate or you will clearly see images behind closed eyes. I am going to attempt to meditate the whole night this time, so I will tell you about that tomorrow.[/COLOR]