New Dream Adventures of Raven Knight

04/13/12

Movies at Home
I am in my own house, it is pretty late at night. There are no lights on, but there's light being emitted by the large screen television in the living room. I go into the room and look at the TV. It seems bigger than I remembered it being… I see there are quite a few people sitting around the TV, all the seats on the couch are filled, both chairs, and there are a few people sitting on the floor. I see my friend Alicia sitting to the left of the TV, and she is making out with some guy I don't know. I don't want to interrupt. I see another friend Tigress off to the right side of the TV, but she is making out with Silver Wolf. I don't want to interrupt them, either. There is a guy sitting almost directly in front of the TV by himself, just watching the movie. I go over and sit down beside him. I look at the movie and I see it is something I don't recognize. I also have the idea it is something I have no interest in. I look over at the guy to my left. I see that he has long silvery hair that seems to shine in even the minimal light of the room. He must have sensed me watching him because he looks over at me. It's Sephiroth! I sit there and stare at Sephiroth for a bit, drawing a strange look from him. I am about to say something to him to explain my rudeness, but before I can he surprises me by pulling me over to him and kissing me full on the lips! I ignore the movie and make out with Sephiroth.


Locked Away
I am in a prison cell of some kind. I have no idea how I got to be there, all I can think of is how my mother is going to react when she finds out I got myself arrested. I have the idea I haven't even gotten to make my one phone call or talk to my lawyer… what is going on here? I try to think of what I might have done to end up in prison. Someone across the hall is yelling rather rude things at me, I choose to ignore him. He is just another prisoner, and probably has no more idea why I am here than I do. Even if he does, he is clearly too rude to help me out. I hear him saying something about magic… about me doing magic to get out of here? Why not? I think for a bit and finally a Harry Potter spell comes to mind… Alohamora. I use that spell on the locked door and I hear a click as the lock disengages. I am about to leave when I hear someone coming. The guy across the hall seems to think the guards are coming to execute me, though I seriously don't think I am in here for anything that serious. I probably got caught stealing something. Unless, of course, I broke in somewhere to steal something and there was a murder that just happened to have taken place at that same scene which I was also being accused of… The guards arrive and someone is complaining that there is a prisoner in this cell, so I step back. Apparently they weren't coming for me after all. So after they're gone, I'll leave. There is a strange old man there who seems to know me, he claims to be the emperor. Emperor? What does he think this is, a game of Oblivion? It turns out that is exactly what he thinks. He says he is Uriel Septim. Um… am I in a game of Oblivion? Cool! I guess I didn't get arrested at all, I just entered a virtual reality so realistic that I forgot it was a game! Harry Potter spells work in Oblivion? I figure it must be a mod. The emperor and the guards leave through the secret exit and I follow them, thinking Oblivion is going to be awesome in virtual reality, but then I wake.

12/17/11

Oblivion: The Escape
I am in prison. I look around to see where I am. I have no memory of how I got to be there or where I actually am. I finally decide I am in a video game, I am playing Oblivion. Awesome! And it's so realistic. The asshole across the hall starts calling me a harlot or something, and I tell him to shut the fuck up unless he can come over here and say it to my face. He keeps talking, saying I wouldn't be talking like that if there weren't bars between us. I ignore him until I hear him say the guards are coming for me, then I look out again and see the emperor and the blades coming into the dungeon. I get back from the door and wait for them to enter. The emperor comes over to me and says he knows me from a dream. Ooo… sounds kinky… he just gives me a strange look. Then he says today is the day the stars foretold. At the urging of the blades, they leave through a secret passage in my cell. I go back to the cell door and tell the asshole across the hall that I'll be going now, maybe we can meet up for a drink… oh, wait! You didn't get a secret passage opening in your cell, well it sucks to be you!

I follow the secret passage and I reach the next chamber just a couple seconds too late. The emperor and the blades have just disappeared through a door, which is now locked. Apparently they locked it behind them. One of the blades is dead in the room, along with a few cloaked figures. I find a sword there which I take. As I had expected, two very large rats attack me from a collapsed wall, we're talking rats the size of an English Mastiff or a Great Dane. I kill the rats with the sword and then head into the caves beyond the collapsed wall. I find some treasure chests and a skeleton with old leather armor. I take the armor as well as a few lockpicks and some gold I find in the chests. I also find a bow and arrows. I snipe a giant rat in the next room with an arrow before it is even aware of my presence. I continue along the passages, there are more treasure chests, some of which are locked so I pick the locks… I find a zombie eating the flesh off of a dead rat. Apparently deciding I look tastier, the zombie comes at me. I throw fireballs at the zombie and it is incinerated. No body left behind? Where is the mort flesh? Oh, well. A couple chambers later I meet my first goblin who I also take out with an arrow.

After a bit more wandering in the caves I find another collapsed wall that leads back to the castle dungeons. I find the emperor and the blades there, resting up a bit after a fight. The two remaining blades want to kill me, saying I might be working with the enemy. The emperor orders them to stand down. I chat with the emperor for a bit, he seems very certain that he is not going to get out of here alive. I stay with them for now, following them through a few more chambers in the dungeons. I snipe a couple of attackers from the shadows where they lie in wait. We soon come to the last chamber where I know the emperor will get killed, he knows it, too. He gives me the amulet of kings just before he is attacked.

I find I can move this time, though! It's not a cut scene, I can attack the asshole! I attack the asshole attacking the emperor and fight him sword to sword. After a short fight I win. I turn back to the emperor and I see a second attacker standing over the emperor's dead body. Damn… I have never seen a second one! Baurus comes in and says he has failed, then asks about the amulet of kings. I tell him what the emperor said about Jauffre and the one remaining heir. He says to take the amulet and go, so I head into the sewers. I snipe a couple more trolls and rats. I soon find my way out of the sewers and into the wilderness outside of Imperial City. I head straight into the city where I am able to sell a lot of the crap I collected for gold and then get a room for the night. I figure it is a good time to save the game, so I do so and lie down on the bed and fall asleep.

As I enter my WILD, I find myself in a prison cell. There is nothing of special note about the place, it looks like a typical dungeon prison cell from some kind of a medieval or RPG world or something like that. I look at the door, it is locked securely from the outside, so there is no way I can open it up. I wonder how I am supposed to get out of there. I am messing around and I realize I am dressed as an Assassin, so I check and find my hidden blade is present. I have no other weapons. I wait for a bit, listening by the door, and finally I hear someone out there. I pound on the door, demanding someone come in there immediately, I figure it doesn't matter who it is. If it's a friend, I'll be glad to see them. If it's an enemy, they'll be sorry they met me. I wait a bit more and then there are keys in the door, it opens. A thug comes inside, it is pretty clear he is a thug, and he definitely doesn't look friendly. He pulls out a knife and says if I don't shut up he'll give me something to scream about. I say he wouldn't dare, he's alone. No one there to save him. He says he could handle me well enough, since I don't even have any weapons. I laugh to myself as he says that and tell him to prove it. He comes towards me, and I activate my hidden blade right as he arrives. He has a shocked look on his face as he is stabbed, he collapses to the ground and dies.

I don't have to look much to find the keys he had used to get into my cell, I take them since I am not sure if I might need them on my way out. I put my hidden blade away and peek out the door of my cell, there are surely more guards around there. There is one guard walking away from my cell on patrol. He turns around the corner and disappears, so I look quickly around one more time and head in his direction. I peek around the corner and see he is coming in my direction, patrolling back, so I lie in wait and greet him with a hidden blade to the gut… he dies. I make my way through the passages silently, though I am not sure when someone will find the bodies I am leaving in my wake. There is a locked door at the end of the hall, one of my keys fits it. I open it up just a crack and look in there to see there are some things on the table in the room as well as three guards. But that's ok… one of those things on the table is my sword! One of the guards is right next to the door… perfect… When I feel ready, I open the door quickly, slamming it into the guard by the door, vaulting over him as he is falling down to imbed my hidden blade in the throat of the guard across the table… that move must have looked pretty cool… I grab my sword from the table and run it through the third guard, cutting the one I knocked over as I spin back. There are now three dead guards in the room and I have my sword.

There are other items there, as well. I see a staff of some kind which I pick up, a strange book of some kind, and a small bag of something I don't take the time to examine. I pick up everything, I don't know who it belongs to, but I am certain it doesn't belong to these idiots here… I leave the room into an open area, a courtyard of some kind. I look around before completely entering the courtyard. There are several places to hide in the courtyard, and I think I can make it to the far gate without being seen. So I start making my way across, going from one area of cover to the next, using the night to cover my movements. I reach a spot about half way to the exit when I hear something, it sounds like an angry animal. I look around and see there is a wolf… or some kind of wolf animal, looks very large even for a wolf, and very pissed off. The assholes who had me locked up have the animal chained up on some rather short chains. I decide that is unacceptable, so I will release the wolf before leaving the compound. I'm not going to leave anyone chained up here.

I quietly go over to where the animal is chained, and it lunges in my direction. I wonder if the wolf will be able to understand what I'm there to do or if it will think I'm one of the enemies. I try to calm the wolf down, I tell the wolf that I am there to help, I will get those chains off, just don't attack me. The wolf does seem to understand that, so I go over there and unlock one of the chains that is holding the wolf. The wolf doesn't wait any longer for me to unlock the second chain, rather it pulls the second chain hard and breaks it before heading off across the courtyard. The wolf is making a lot of noise and commotion, which gets the attention of practically every guard in the place. The guards first look shocked that the wolf is free, then they look terrified of that, then they look dead after they get torn apart by teeth and claws… I watch the carnage for a bit until the wolf gets to a point where I won't be able to see it any more. The wolf looks back at me, I'd swear it shot a knowing nod off in my direction, then is gone from sight. The sounds of more carnage come from that direction. Now that there is no more benefit from secrecy, I take out my sword and take the direct route out the nearest exit and into the forest, cutting through three guards as I go.

I am hidden in the forest, I sit down to rest for a couple minutes. I am wondering if the wolf sure got out safely. I didn't see that it would be a problem considering what had happened to the guards I saw get torn apart. I am sitting there when I hear a sound from farther away in the forest. I hear something that sounds like growling, a couple sounds like a yelp, some growling that sounds suspiciously close to expletives, and finally a thud. Wtf? I wonder if something happened… I follow the sounds for a bit, making my way through the forest until I woke up.