Lucid-schizo-dreamer

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

Walking up an alley of a park with a younger sister or cousin. On arriving at a terrace where there is a restaurant, we are cut off by barriers and cannot pass, because Ronaldo has booked it to have a private lunch there and no one can go throughit. I am upset and try to go around, but then he arrives by car and also blocks my way. I try to just ignore and move on, but something happens and he ends up also taking a walk in the park, almost side by side to us. As I reminisce to my companion about this place and some memories from my childhood, I notice he is listening and curious to know more. He asks me something about a street ahead and I suddenly remember stuff about it and drag him along in my revisitation of the place. I stayed there in a pension for some time and as I remember more details, I basically offer him a tour to this small town. He totally abandons his lunch plans and just joins us for good. Then we pass by a small place I mention has great veggie food, very basic but delicious and I invite him to have lunch there with us. He makes a bit of a snarky comment because of the veggie food, but then is really surprised to see that it is a very simple place with locals and not some fancy modern joint and I see curiosity won. I swear to him he will not forget about this place, either he likes the food or not, just because it is so authentic. By chance my dad is there with my aunt Ana and other people. They are waiting in line because there are no seats. I join them waiting in line and Ronaldo says we don't have to because of who he is, certainly they'll get us some table. Of course people recognize him when he enters and talk about it and some are very welcoming to him, but those that are sitting and eating with friends and family aren't bulging for him to get a seat and the fact is there really are no tables. What people do is they rearrange the tables so we have an area where we can sit on the floor if we want. I am ok with it, but he is not and so we just leave and continue our tour outside.
My dad reminded me that not only we spent some vacation on this town, but that we own an old house on this street. I am surprised and can't remember that at all, but he says it is that small property that appears mentioned on the IRS form and somehow it makes sense to me. He says it's just a couple blocks away, so I go look for it. Spot some folks building up a new house in the place where I thought was ours, can't figure out which one it is, so then we return and keep waiting for a table at the restaurant. By now Ronaldo is definitely feeling the hots for me and he grabs me by the waist and grabs my ass and pushes me against a wall, about to kiss me. But then my dad suddenly appears and ruins the moment. Ronaldo goes get some air for a minute and my dad comes talk to me. I guess he must be really proud that I am snatching such a rich famous guy and indeed he is, but also makes some comment about his manners and I have to agree that he is not exactly being a gentleman with me. I am not sure how I feel about it.

Walking by a boardwalk by the sea, recognizing some places. Seeing them with so much detail and thinking I don't wanna go there, because it is a place from another dream I had one day and nothing good came out of it. Then realize I am dreaming and it is a very stable lucid. The first thing that comes to my mind is to summon Avalokiteshvara. I really don't know why that was my first thought, but I did. Unfortunately, I immediately get surrounded by a pack of menacing growling dogs like dobbermans and rotweillers and I have to climb over a wall to protect myself. They keep jumping at me, viciously trying to attack me and I realize they are the protection mechanism or agents that always come if you try to liberate yourself, or meet those who can help you with that. I hadn't met them in a while. Then I remember that they have no power over me unless I give it to them, so I point the palm of my hands at them and slowly push them away with a kind of force field that makes me untouchable. One by one, the dogs step down and leave. I keep walking down the boardwalk while repeating mantras and continue to call for the deity. Don't see it anywhere but some lady approaches me offering me t-shirts. I say no and she insists that I follow her. I feel she is up to no good and accuse her of trying to distract me. After insisting a couple times, she walks away but I keep an eye on her as she walks towards the ocean and stays on the sand at the beach nearby. Wonder if she may be a manifeststion of the deity inviting me to come along and I rejected her, but I don't feel it. She passes by me again and leaves a box on the sand. Some girl says this is a gift to me but I am still suspicious of her intentions, so I don't touch it. The box opens by itself and contains gold statuettes of what initially also look like deities, so for a while I think this might be a sign. But as I look closer, the statuettes represent just common people in sex acts, like one lady going down on another and a threesome where someone is banging another from behind. Don't know what all of it means, but I think this is just Mara tempting me with distractions. Then I wake up.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

Looking to attend my guru's teachings. Not sure if I will see him, because I just dropped by and was not invited, so I decide to explore the place a little bit and see if I encounter him by chance. I risk going through an area I am not supposed to enter. I come across a few monks and lamas on a hallway and before they see me, I go down a flight of stairs that lead me to a sort of chamber where some people are seated waiting for an audience with my teacher. Nobody sees me as I hide under a table covered in a cloth. At the opposite side of this room there is an opening to outside and I spot my teacher arriving with a group of people. I am watching through a gap in the cloth and I notice that although he is talking with the people on his group, his eyes are looking in my direction and I know that he knows that I am hiding there. I feel there is no need to keep hiding, so I come out and join the other people in sitting on the floor in front of a low wooden stage. My teacher comes to talk to people but he chooses to sit on directly on the floor of the stage, right in front of me. Since his eyes locked with mine, he hasn't let go and I feel as if he is inside me. I feel dizzier as he comes closer, so close I stop feeling there's a separation between us. I become sort of lucid, not exactly, it is more like a small enlightenment. I feel so light that a breeze pushes me through the ground and slowly it elevates me in the air, seated in half-lotus position. I just go with the wind, I cross walls and tree trunks and rise up in the air. I rise and rise until I am in outer space, surrounded by darkness with the dim lights of the stars shining far away. Then I go across the fabric of the universe itself, until all shapes and forms start to disappear one by one. All of my memories fade like 2D pictures dissolving in a black background. I let go all of them. But then I panic. I don't want to lose my teacher's memory. I hold on to his memory. And as I do it, a faint vision of a table and a chair become stronger in front of me and I grab the chair and sit, to stabilize this reference. I grab the table and try to recall familiar things. Then from the table, embedded in it, a dark male figure rises, kinda demonic, but I feel it is also the help I need to go back. He wants to know what I want. I state clearly that I have to go back to my teacher, no matter the time or place, just meeting him again.
He says no way, that's gone, now I am stuck here forever in this limbo. But I insist on coming back to my teacher. I recall the time I last saw him, but any other time and space will do. He gets mad and disappears. Around me a scenario of an office starts to take shape. I get up and walk around until I find a couple ladies at a booth, like a ticket booth at a train station and they ask me my destination. They ask date and exact hour. I don't know. I feel a bit confused. They yell there is no time for hesitations. Only a few seconds for the time to be set. I could see in a screen random numbers starting to form a date and I shout my actual birth date and as I am saying the hours, I am already feeling a pull and I am thrown back on planet earth. As I approach I see the clouds, rocks, majestic ocean waves, buildings and people and I feel an intense happiness that I will be meeting my teacher again.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

... I meet a beautiful exotic lady and she is hitting on me. I feel flattered, a bit excited, but an alarm rings at the same time. I seem to sense something beneath the appearances. I reject the seduction. So her face morphs indistinctively and becomes monstrous. I recognize the demon, Lord Mara. He asks "maybe if I'm a handsome man instead?" and he starts shapeshifting into a hot guy, but I know who he really is, so I reject his seduction. I've already seen his true face! So his shapeshifting doesn't hold and I keep seeing his real monstrous face underneath. I tell him I know we're in a dream, but even so I won't succumb to his temptations. He gets mad. He summons some bad guys with big guns who start shooting in my direction. I'm hit by some bullets, but I repeat that nothing is real, I feel the certainty inside me growing and so the bullets just stop hitting the target. Like Neo, I don't have to dodge bullets Mara gets really furious. He reveals his true self and comes like an explosion towards me with his sharp teeth and claws, threathening to shred me into pieces. But I stay put, I hold my ground. I feel a bit scared deep down, but I keep reminding that he is just my mind. He stops just milimeters from my face. I grab it and make it melt, like I can do to walls and anything else. Melting and angry, he grins at me and says that I may win this battle, but that he will keep coming back, as I know. I do. But I also know it is up to me to stop him entirely, that's enlightnement. But what am I missing? I melt and make disappear the entire dream. I stay for a few moments in the emptiness, then I wake up.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


A typical dream of sum of all fears. I am chased by zombies, blood sucking monsters, man-eating tigers, while trying to get out of a complex maze building. One by one, I face all my fears and conquer them, at first by using my warrior skills, then increasingly by applying my super powers, then lastly by realizing the illusory nature of everything around me and dissolving it.
I manage to exit the maze and bring some other woman with me, by realizing that I can create an exit as soon as I know I can.
Once safely outside, I am already planning how to free all others still caught in this maze of illusions. That's when the devilish ruler of the maze appears in front of me, kind of congratulating me for getting out, but I think aslo trying to figure out his next move to entrap me. He still has a trick or two up his sleeve.
My cell phone rings, I pick up, no one replies to my hello, but I hear voices talking on the other side of the line. So I listen to them, I know who they are, people I have been doing business with. They say the bank did not approve my loan request, my reputation is dragged in the mud, my business partners are disappointed and distrust me, my whole "real life" is collapsing. I panic!
Then, for a split second I realize "shit, I'm still trapped. he found my real weaknesses. it's not zombies and flesh eating beasts, it's my fucking "real life" and its mundane shits, my worries about my rep, my future." The true nightmare starts now! I freak out and wake up gasping.