NyxCC

A series of FAs where I am trying to fall asleep while a DC keeps distracting me so I can't seem to transition. After a few more FAs, I realize the previous ones were actually dreams so should have already acted there.

Scene change, some on and off lucidity scenario with family members at grandma.

Inanimate object - blanket lady

A bit later, I get a wave of really strong awareness and remember thanks to reading other people's reports the inanimate object task. There is a blanket so I lift it up with some sort of thought control and say hello. I begin to laugh and it answers me with a creepy echo laughter. Moreover, it turns and twists and becomes the upper part of an 18th century woman. In the dream I try to memorize the shape to eventually draw it later on.

Clone

After this I take quite a while trying to remember any other tasks. I am even overly concerned that all this strain will certainly end the dream, but luckily it doesn't and I recall the clone task. I try to think about myself while turning around but nothing happens. I decide to half close my eyes, risking the dream disappearing while thinking of an image of myself but again nothing happens. Finally, I decide to open the door and expect to see her/me there. This seems to work and I finally meet her. We go into the corridor where there are a number of somewhat harassing DCs and then into the kitchen. I have no idea what to do with my clone though, so we just walk around from room to room until her features change.

Then I spot Gordon Ramsay who looks very tired and I try to talk to him. Fluctuations in lucidity, rises up again while I speak to him. He asks if I can hear him well. There are distortions in the direction of the sound for a moment. The alarm wakes me up.

Date: 16 May

Wbtb

I fall asleep and have a brief non-ld where I am with family members in this unfamiliar house. It's dark in the room and I am trying to fall asleep but they keep on talking so loud. At some point everybody leaves and I find myself in a large movie room with big screen TV and loud bass systems. I think to myself that I find it really weird people are so obsessed with these things. A large TV, so what? Now, it would be much cooler if actually you were making this whole TV into existence, if you were the cause of all the music - ie. if you are dreaming all this. Then this will give a whole new meaning to the experience. I take a moment to imagine how it would feel.

Memory gap. I end up in another room where I feel my awareness come into focus and I realize that I made it to the dream. My mom is also here for a bit. I remember a few goals and also the advanced task of doing an in-dream wild and briefly consider trying it. However, this is not among the goals I reviewed during the wbtb and now I can't remember (also irl at the time of journalling) whether this is still the current month's task or already last month's. I decide I don't want to end up doing an old task and drop it altogether. There is a large earth globe in the completely empty now narrow room and I do a mix of telekinesis and wind blowing it around wondering if that would count towards air bending. After I have enough fun with levitating it around, I recall the other basic task - become friends with the monster under your bed.

I move forward and cautiously open the door to the next room, hoping this will work to reveal something handy. It opens into a dark room, which I disregard and continue forward. There is a bed just ahead of me and I lean down and look to see what's below. There is a ton of junk piled up. While I try to think of a monster being there I get a flash of disappearing transparent eyes. I decide to stare in the stuff below in the hopes that something will show up. After a while, I begin to see a movement under some rags and follow it. It stops and then starts at another place. I dig a bit to finally find the monster - a grey mouse! The little beast is so hyperactive it is hard to keep it in one place and as I try to hold it and make friends it even bites me! I think about the task again taking mental notes of what is going on. Ok, it has to calm down so I start caressing it. I do so for a bit until it finally calms down, I make another mental note about this and conclude that we are now friends.

The dream seems to end but it's actually an FA. I find myself journalling a page and a half worth of dreams with a lot of details and also noting my goals for the next dream. The tablet then malfunctions and keeps giving me a gaming radar with the bad guys as red dots coming near. I'm getting really confused about this since I think I have solved all my problems for the moment. It then switches to a cool 16 bit game with characters unknown to me. I decide to play it for a bit and it actually works like a normal game - very complex and thoroughly thought out. Yet I can't comprehend how this game self installed on my tablet. Why do I have this game? And then it hits me! This is an FA and I just wrote a ton of dreams for nothing. But the game - well that was pretty awesome, I think to myself, I played quite a bit of a dream game. I'm super amazed at this. The dream soon ends.

Date: 2 July

Pre bed: SJW, 100mg B6, 1 p.oil capsule

Total sleep time: 8 hrs

Early LD (+2hrs after falling asleep): Unfortunately, I don't remember much as I feel asleep after the LD (even though I thought about it briefly) then woke up some time after that to visit the restroom therefore managed to put some key words. Obviously a very exciting to me LD, somewhere outdoors like a yard with lots of DCs and had something to do with TOTM.

WBTB: p.oil capsule and some latte. I was very sleepy and did not spend the necessary time out of bed, I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. I have very little recall of the dreams that followed too.

Dreams: related to classmates again. Back to school for some event.

OBE/FA/LD: Just before final wake and I guess after some dream I can't remember, I end up in the void. I concentrate on my hearing and notice sounds that most likely come from outside. As I do that I end up in my room. There is some confusion because the part of the bed and room that I see totally looks like my room and everything is very clear. I start some maneuvering to fall asleep/ld?, change the scene, move my dream body while having no idea which body is moving after all. After these dream body movements, I fall on the floor with some bedsheets. While the fall is not physical, I am still slightly confused and think that I may really have fallen down, so continue with my efforts to project somewhere else. Then I notice a toy of mine is on the floor as well, but it is transparent and there's two of it, so that finally works as a plausible RC, but before I could react, I wake up for real and of course I very suspiciously look around and RC.

Comment: Yeah, I definitely prefer those types of WILDs/DILDs where you just enter a dream somewhere else. These in my bed/which body is it type of situations are just so confusing. Also I should increase time out of bed during WBTB even if this means some insomnia, because I have been sleeping so deep lately that recall and LDs suffer. Well, at least I get some nice sleep.

Date: 13 June

Not very funny FA and LD chain

Total sleep time: 4 hrs

Comments: Tonight definitely was a bad time to go for a lucid. We had a sleep over guest and I was nervous I had to wake up the same time as our guest and no idea when that would be. I repeated the same combo as yesterday (but had different results?), did SSILD to help with sleep and induce ld. I got into a rather nasty FA chain. The resulting lucidity was not to be envied either.

Pre bed: Gingko

WBTB: I was woken up, had 1/2 RB about half an hour later. Trouble falling asleep.

Fragment: A DC that looks like my father shows aggressive attitude

FA1: I am in bed and guest is knocking on the door, saying he is leaving now. I hear him and partially see him, but I also see some other layer with my reflection on it. I decide that I am dreaming the second layer, while he is trying awake me irl. I tell him to leave me alone and come back later because I am just either lucid or missing a FA.

FA2: I am in bed, and there is trash, food leftovers and other stuff on the bedsheets. I find it a bit strange but swipe it aside and continue sleeping.

FA3: I wake up and go to the toilet. I look myself in the mirror. I look terrible, my face is swollen. I think "What have I done, this is probably because of the supps/RB". As if that isn't enough, I feel a very strong pressure in my head. Ahhhh

FA4 and DILD: I wake up and go to pee. Some nonexistent pipe breaks down and starts rhythmically pumping out water. I think this is too bad to be real life, and question the nature of reality. The pipe keeps pumping water, flooding the place, so I run into the room where our guest is sleeping to ask for help. He comes in the bathroom but it is not him at all, but a strange looking DC that has something not very human in his posture? I finally conclude that this can only be a dream. I go to the corridor, the strange DC next to me and an older lady. The dream gets distorted, images from other places appear in my mind, while I am thinking of an efficient way to leave our place. The dream disintegrates.

DILD2: I renter some place but the DCs there keep getting in my way so I cannot go as I would like to. the dream fades

DILD3: I am in another apartment, a geeky looking DC is trying to get my attention. I don't want to be here. I notice a large cupboard and am tempted to try passing through it. I am mostly wondering if I will be able to overcome the solidity and also see what will happen once I get in there. The cupboard is initially solid, but I push myself forward and it suddenly swallows me into the darkness with a strange gulp like sound. There is something very watery to that ex cupboard space, and I feel as if I am underwater. Very interesting, I think to myself. I swim forward ending in the void, the underwater sensations fading away. Back to my physical body, I may have even moved my real hands a bit while in the void.

DILD4: Another dream starts and I am in an apartment again. A number of daring DCs are here as well. I try to go on my way, but this DC woman gets in front of me holding a bread knife. I notice that we are in the kitchen, and try to make her engage in slicing the bread that is there, instead of behaving menacingly. I meet resistance and am unable to control her much. I am adjusting my mood as not to expect her to do anything to me, trying to be as non-reactionary as possible. She has the knife in one hand and gets a cleaver in the other. I struggle with her hand, also attempting to grab the knife from time to time, while being careful not to cut myself. I know this is dream and I don't care so much, but I am annoyed that things aren't going my way. There is someone else pushing me, causing me discomfort and mild pain. I move away a bit, feeling exhausted and desperate.

Since the dream is going nowhere, I allow the DC woman to get me, but now she has other intentions. I organize a pleasurable indecent scene and wake up shortly after.

I wake up and go to the restroom and check out my reflection in the mirror. I look terrible. I RC. Tired, nervous and annoyed I consider if I want to go back to sleep. Shortly journal, then try to fall asleep but it is too late.

This nightmare approximates to official count of 2 Lds? and 2 micro lds.

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Date: 14 June

Total sleep time: 8 hrs

Sleep quality and recall: Deep restorative sleep, below average recall

Pre bed: Gingko

Bedtime dreamlet: There is a discussion about the advantages of living in China vs living in France. It seems that living in China is much better. I am entering China, zooming in trying to determine my location. Very hard to describe I see the land and plants as if I am on the ground yet it is in the shape of the map of China. There are blackberries that represent each city in China, and are very close together which means very crowded.

I realize that I am falling asleep and pull back from the dream, trying to commit it to memory.

WBTB: very tired after yesterday's lack of sleep, so I just couldn't do it

Dream1: I am on the street and there is a house to my left. Xanous comes from there. We talk about something. A friend of mine comes, I can't remember now if Xanous knows him.

Xanous is now gone somewhere. Me and my friend are trying to have a shared dream via DV but actually don't know that we are having a shared dream with each other. What are the odds? I tell this realization to my friend and we are happy. He invites me to his place where I have been in dreams. I check out the furniture. He leads me through the corridor, but I insist on having a look at the bedroom. There is a sliding door, double bed with white bed sheets, and a wardrobe with a mirror to the left.

Fragment2: My class meets again, this time boys only. I don't know why I am here and they behave like idiots. I look at them and have a strange feeling that something is not quite right here (as in this is a dream!) but continue being involved in the scene.

Progress with goals as the 14th morning:

- Do 100 RCs (15/100) *
- notice real life DS 100 times and RC (17/100)
- 10 proper WBTB attempts -> days (6/10)
- 10 morning RCs (3/10)
- 2 proper WILD attempts (0/2)
- task flexibility
- journal flexibility

*I am also practicing some ADA, so it is not as bad as it seems, although I need to increase the RCs

LDs: 12 (official count)
micro-lds: 4 (not counted)
suspicious events: 2 (not counted)

Date: 28 May

Comments: Fourth day of fragmented recall, I hope this isn't the new normal

Fragment1: In my grandma's place, there is a huge box of B2 vitamins

Fragment2: Eating blue sharks, I was wondering about the exact species names

Fragment3: I possibly had an ld on the street, some animals were involved.

Fragment4: FA, I catch myself thinking about the dream that has just been, semi awake to bring this temporarily to consciousness, then fall asleep again.

Fragment5: My mom's friends are accompanying a living body which is just a body no mind/soul at the moment, and can easily follow them by itself as long as they are close enough. I later see a big lady bug which hits something like a lamp and makes loud noise when doing so.

Pre bed: Green tea

Total sleep time: 9 hrs

Dream quality and recall: went to bed very late, deep sleep tonight, and recall was hard. I have been trying to recall the whole first dream all day long but with little success.

Fragment1 DILD: I am looking at a male person, concentrating on top of their head. I see a second more transparent double layer shining with color, I am so aware, lucid is an understatement. I get a great sense of understanding. There is a discussion and feelings of happiness from my side. I am also talking with PennyRoyal, he is one of my good buddies in the dream. It was very vivid, but I don't have much recall. My key impressions are positive feelings, knowledge and understanding. This was my first memorable REM or Non-REM? for the night.

Fragment2: Me and somebody else are about to catch a small plane. We are in front of a very small airport, but we need to get to the other part of the airport, we are looking at a map of the area.

brief natural wake, had the idea of writing down the previous dreams but was way too tired, thought I would remember it, so went back to sleep

Fragment3: FA, I wake up in my bed, grab the tablet and start writing down the dream with Penny. My bf is near me, watching what I have typed, I stop writing, I wake up.

WBTB: I wake up, this time jot down keywords, and spend 10 mins struggling to remember more of the dream. Reviewed tasks, but had the feeling this will be it for today.

Dream4: We are in some place with my bf with a blond guy, resembling a former classmate. While he is a total stranger, but my bf doesn't mind him spending the evening with us. We talk for a long time, he is slightly arrogant. The guy decides it's time to leave so he jumps from a bridge. I watch him vanish in the air instead of falling in the water.

Fragment5: Another attempt to remember the dream with Penny, but I am trying to recall during the dream itself. This time I see a water in front of me, it is a waterfall. I think the dream with Penny might have included Angel Falls, also get some feeling of happiness, yet cannot remember more even during the dream.

Fragment6: A new thread started by Xanos

Dream7: I am with my parents in a familiar place. I have the feeling this is the second dream in that place for today. We talk about something with my mom, and I decide to go to another room. I then go out. I feel much better now, by myself, on the street, there is a fence and obviously a zoo. A lot of people are there, I join them. I see a polar bear cub, and that people are actually going beyond the fence. I want to go to where the cub is so I also cross over and am inside the section with the animals.

I look to the other side and see now a brown bear cub, it is on its back, drinking a bottle of coke. I am with a friend of mine and I tell her that the zoo keepers will think that we gave the drink to the bear and be angry with us. I try to take the bottle of coke away from the bear, but I am taking its food, it is stressed now. I am afraid of its mother, which is a much larger polar bear. We are sitting on a couch with some DCs, when the mother bear comes. I try to think of a plan to escape, without attracting her attention. I think at that point she transforms into a DC, conveys the message that she wants us to leave her territory, so I ask the DCs that we go. They get up, we are leaving, and the mother bear DC is grateful.

Comments: It's been three days in a row that I have been dreaming animals, it is high time I begin to recognize this as a dream sign! Also, upon waking up don't forget to at least count fingers or do any RC, to take advantage of those FAs.

A bit out of time this week, an actually not so brief update:

13 May

- Me and a group of 5 kids decide to create a business. We go to register it, and the start up costs are only 100. We talk to some lawyer who says its is excellent because we are all from different countries.

- I become upset and leave the house of a friend wearing slippers. It is very hard to walk with these but I don't find this unusual.

- In our old neighborhood, there are lots of new stores. I go in a supermarket where they are making fresh carrot juice, it is green in color, I wonder a bit about that, but conclude that green carrot juice is ok.

14 May

- In our old place, my mom keeps talking, while I want to go to sleep. I tell her that her talking activates my brain and I cannot fall asleep. It is early morning, still dark outside and snowing.

- I see Dr dre on the street, he is smoking and I want to join him. Before I do, he has finished with the stuff. A skater boy pushes him hard and I think how rude kids are nowadays. I follow Dre to a building, but the cops are all over the place. I have a micro second of lucidity, remembering I read a part of Xanos's dream from yesterday and know it this the cause for this one. I lose my lucidity a second later and try to leave the building.

- I am in jail which looks like a normal house, my belongings are also there. A woman calls me and I think they are finally letting me go. She informs me that she allows me to go out, so that I can find a woman called Connie Flowers or something similar. A friend from school is also accompanying me. We look for the place where Connie lives, but cannot find her. I have another second brief moment of clarity and high awareness, when I am climbing a fence, while looking for her. I continue following the dream but get the brilliant idea to ask some old ladies to show me the way to Connie's house. They all point in one direction and that excites me a lot. I am absorbed back by the dream and we go to the place the women were pointing at.

- A false awakening where I jot down key words from the previous dream. I write Connie Flowers on a piece of paper. Had it not been this FA, I probably would have forgotten the name. It was so realistic that I actually looked down and expected to see it written in my notebook, but nothing was there irl.

- On a street, thinking about last night's dreams. I look at the sky, and decide to star gaze. I have my blanket with me. I get interrupted by a machine washing the streets. My slippers get washed away...

Note: micro-lucids, not counting
Pretty busy this week, I wish my sleep could condense, so that I still get some nice REM moments.

Woke up in the middle of the night after Fragment1, could not fall asleep so began day dreaming. An hour and a half passed in this insomnia, which you could say was an involuntary WBTB.

Fragment1: Reading DV discussion

Dream2[DILD]: [This was a very long dream and I forgot some parts of it. I was going in and out of lucidity.] My first memory is that I am in front of our old home, on the street and it is night. I am lucid at this point. There are a number of DCs in front of me and they get scared, point at the sky. I look and there are some clouds coming, some supposedly scary sound and a bigger than usual moon. Something is coming towards us. I decide to go in the building.

The next thing I remember is I wake up in my old room and bed non-lucid (FA). I begin to move things around via TK and think, “I have become so good at this in my dreams, that I can finally do it irl”. I am a bit afraid of falling asleep, so I decide to stay awake in the room. I do things to keep myself awake, turning on more lights, other stuff I can’t remember. I spend a really long time there. I look out the window and notice that the nearby building is closer that it really is, but I totally disregard this, looking at some fancy handbags.

At some point a good DC appears, his presence helps me get lucid again. The moment he is there, I already know that it is a dream again. I sit on a school desk, he sits near me and we interact, no sure if we talk, or he just stays there, while I have all these thoughts about lucidity. I am very glad about the whole thing. We spend a long time there. Soon the room changes and I am in some kind of shop, looking at cosmetics, non-lucid. There is a lovely lip gloss made of honey, and I consider purchasing it. The female owner of the shop wants us out though, so the good DC helps me take the lip gloss out of the shop, I put it in his pocket and we walk out.

I am in a building and enter a new room. Because the good DC is with me, I regain lucidity again. I am very happy. There is more interaction with him, just talking and thinking about the dream. This time he is the actor Robin Williams. I tell him that despite the fact that he is very friendly and nice, I am already bored of spending so much time with this character, so I try to change him to the singer Robbie Williams. I do that very easily, change him, but do not succeed in getting Robbie, but some other person, I don’t like the way he looks.

At that point, there are bad DCs outside the room, throwing some grenades at the building. This is a dream after all, and I shouldn’t pay too much attention to that. But as I look out of the window, there are more of them and another grenade hits the building, cracking the wall. I lose my lucidity, it is time for me to get out of there. I try to take my things, but I don’t have any here, and I am in my pyjamas! This is the third floor and I go down the stairs in direction basement.

On the stairs, while evacuating the house with other DCs, I regain my lucidly again and decide to make a portal or passage through the basement, so that I get out of there. When I reach the basement a see a very long corridor, where the DCs from the building are running. At this point, I become very concerned that I am starting to forget parts of the dream, I wonder if there is any way for me to review it, but continue following the DC crowd. We reach a room full of stairs and I climb all of them, I am at the last one when I finally awake.

Dream3: We are in our old place and a squirrel gets in. It is very aggressive and jumps on everything, me including. I don’t like it, so I throw it out of the window. My mom is worried that it might have hurt itself, but I see it on the tree. It tries to get into our place, so I close all the windows. In my hand I am holding a squirrel tail, I touch it and remark how soft and fluffy it really is.

Dream4: My parents and I are queuing for Burger King. In front of us there are two girls who hold drinks on their heads and do some crazy moves. That irritates me. It is our turn to order but I have no idea what they have because there are no pictures. My mom tells me to go first and I tell the woman behind the counter – Liz from Nip/Tuck, that I haven’t been to BK over a year, so I forgot what they have. I tell my mom to order and she gets some chicken burger, I order the same. We go to McDonalds to sit there, we are just going to order some drinks and sit.

Fragment5: I am drawing something again.