Schmaven's Dream Journal of Randomness

Driving down the highway with my mom in the driver's seat, we're talking about things. You know, the usual update stuff that doesn't change much from week to week. My girlfriend comes up in the conversation at some point and my mom get's really jealous. I can tell she's really upset over something. She stops talking and just steps on the gas. Okay, so she's upset, that's fine I think as I watch the scenery whip by faster and faster.

I look over at her and she's practically in tears now as we pass 100 mph. I start to feel uncomfortable as she drives faster and faster. She and I are pretty well connected, and without saying a word, I just know that she's thinking, "If I can't have him, no one will" and that she's going to crash the car and kill us both. At this point we're going over 120 mph and I don't know what to do about this situation. I consider taking the wheel and spinning the car out of control to a stop, but since we're going so fast, that could be just as deadly as whatever she has planned. That's actually the only thing I think to do other than ride it out.

Maybe if I just sit here peacefully she'll have a change of heart before it's too late... I quietly hope as the situation gets super tense for me. I see a turn in the road with no guard rail, and a huge cliff over the edge. This must be where she's headed. That's okay though, we still have a few seconds for her to change her mind. No sooner do I think that than the car careens off the road and over the cliff. My stomach sinks, my hair stands on end, and I look out the window. Several hundred feet below I can hardly see the ground it's so far away. This is it, this is how my end finally comes I think as it dawns on me that there's no way out of this one.

Despite the distance, in a matter of seconds the car smashes into rocks below. The dash smashes my head and everything goes black after a brief white flash.

Gradually, some color starts to fade into my awareness and I find myself standing amidst massive crystals of every color, all arranged immaculately and beautifully. The most amazing sight I've ever seen! It all feels so peaceful as well.

I walk through the crystals as I sense some purpose for me. I don't know precisely what I am supposed to do, but I do know that I can't just stay put and kick off my shoes just yet. So I walk through a breathtaking crystal maze with glowing lights coming from just about every crystal. I don't know what I'm looking for, but I'm looking for something.

I reach a huge palace and dozens of really nice people greet me. They're all strangely familiar, yet I can't quite place how I know them. Also, they all seem so peaceful and happy, like everything is perfect, and they have no worries. They call out to me and we exchange small talk for a bit. It comes up that I can really do anything I want now. I think about this for a second and decide that the best thing I can do is show the example of someone attaining enlightenment, and refocus my mind on the spiritual path.

Everything starts to blur for a bit, and I reappear clearly firing a rocket at someone who is trying to steal a huge diamond from a bank. As I fire the rocket, I realize it's my mom! Somehow I manage to stop it from killing her and run over. She looks at me hesitantly, as I do the same to her. I don't know if I can let my guard down around her anymore after she just killed me. She apologizes for killing me and we talk about what happened after I died. She tells me that she survived the crash, but I didn't. It was deemed an accident, but she was really distraught over it for a long time. I tell her that it's okay, I forgive her. But it still might take me some time before I get in the car with her again.

She's okay with that.

I'm driving my mom's car for the first time in a while, and am having a grand old time doing 360s on the snowy road, while avoiding crashing into the other traffic on the road. I turn up a hill to my right and the back end of the car whips around half way, I turn the wheel the other direction, slam it in reverse and put the pedal to the floor, causing the car to do 2 complete spins. I'm heading toward a big snow bank, so I turn the wheel the other way and keep the pedal to the floor. The car starts going back down the hill toward the road. It's really slippery, so I start turning about a hundred feet before the road. Sliding sideways pretty fast now, I keep my foot on the gas and power slide out into the main road. Another car is coming the opposite direction. I do some fancy maneuvering with the steering wheel to get out of the power slide and just barely avoid the oncoming car. Close call there. Now on the main road, I'm just driving normally. Another car comes, but it is really straddling the center line. I move over to avoid it, but it's too far on my side. I spin my car sideways to avoid a head on collision, and just tap the front headlight of the other car with the rear bumper of mine. I pull over into the nearby store to see if the other car is damaged or not. She has already pulled in, and the store owner and her are looking at the car. I get out, turn the car off, and walk up, seeing a bunch of fluid pouring out of the other car. It looks like radiator fluid. At least it's coming out of the radiator, it really looks just like water. The store owner says, "You might want to add some oil or antifreeze to it." The other driver looks at her, gets a really upset look on her face and yells back, "Really?!? Obviously I'll have to add more coolant to it! How could I not?" I notice a pipe has come completely loose. If that pipe could just be welded back on, she'd be good to go. I think about possible repair costs and mechanic labor. Looking at the pipe again, a new pipe might not be that expensive, it's a straight tube going between two fittings. So one pipe, one fitting, and an hour tops to weld it, can't be much more than $200. I'm relieved that it won't be very expensive because I'm broke. Although it's really ironic that I didn't crash at all while messing around, but only when I started to drive safely that something happened...

Riding my bicycle along a road, it begins to get steeper and steeper. There are other people also on bicycles who had to stop and walk their bikes. I even see a few cars that are unable to climb the hill. It's so steep, that it's hard to walk up. I'm in a higher gear, but the hill came on so fast that I am unable to downshift as quickly as I would like, and just muscle through it for a few pedal strokes as the bike downshifts. People tell me I can't make it, but I believe I can. My legs feel like they are on fire, as they shake with all my energy going into each pedal stroke. I'm still not in the lowest gear, but I know that if I downshift, I will lose all my momentum and that will be the end of it for me. So I push on, letting my legs burn, shake, and otherwise crank the pedals in each revolution. As the hill gets even steeper, I push even harder - beyond where I thought my maximum limit existed. I even start to gain some speed as the hill gets steeper. It's like my legs are growing stronger the more I push myself. Passing beyond everyone, I feel happy that I didn't give up when no one else believed in me.

I take this dream as encouragement to always believe in myself and give life everything I've got, no matter how things look to others, and even no matter how hopeless things may look to me.

In a small room with a monk, surrounded by tough looking men armed with flails, I don't know what to expect. I too have a flail, but the monk is unarmed, sitting down at the table with 5 glasses of tea and water of varying sizes. There is a big cup, a mug, a shot glass, a regular cup and a tiny glass. Apparently, the men are waiting for us to pay them in exchange for the release of some children they are holding in captivity.

The monk tells them, "I must first drink 5 glasses" and proceeds to drink from the large cup. Then he pulls me close and whispers, "When you see me get the children, attack them with your flail, but run to follow me once I've gotten far enough away with the children". Still holding me close like he is going to say something else, he remains silent for a few moments. I feel like this is a suicide mission, but don't mind because it will save the children.

Finishing the 5 glasses, he begins to sign a check as the armed men look on eagerly. One of them quickly snatches it away when he finishes signing it, and they all begin to push us both out of the room. No sign of the children anywhere, it seems like they had no intention of freeing them in the first place, and now might just try to kill us.

I walk into an auditorium in the middle of a performance, but turn around to find a more subtle way out. The men with flails slowly walk toward us like some sort of wall of death - slow, but certain. We exit out the front door, run down some stairs and jump over a bush. Seeing our car in the parking lot, we run to it, and squeeze through a gap in the chain link fence.

Speeding away from there, night quickly falls, and we find ourselves on a one way road that turns into a two way road. Swerving to dodge oncoming traffic, our car becomes a monorail train on a track, automatically piloted. Up ahead is a sharp 180 degree turn. I hold on as the train banks into it and quickly turns the corner.

I am the new batman, just finishing up the right bat costume. Unfortunately, I still have white socks, drive an old Buick, and work at a lousy low paying job. On the way home, I drive through the park, and see someone getting mugged. I'm too tired to stop and do anything about it after work, and have to work again early tomorrow, so I drive past, trying not to let them see I'm batman. Both of them see me, especially the white socks and white undershirt. I park the car in front of my house, and blow up an inflatable decoy batman to leave in the drivers seat. Going inside, I don't yet notice that the inflatable batman has somehow managed to start the car and put pressure on the gas pedal, slowly driving away down the street.

I run downstairs, and get on the motorcycle to chase after my car and recover it. Going way too fast, I nearly crash a few times, and get some good air time off speed bumps in the road. Finally, I crash the bike, it launches off a hill, and smashes into a stone archway leading down to the ocean. I go air-born, and slam into a castle wall. Not really hurt, just stunned, I lay there for a bit. The butler comes out, and yells at me furiously. I see the car! Running to my car to get away, the butler is in hot pursuit.

He chases me through town, and tries to ram me off the road. I slow down and dodge him, also slowing to avoid the river and cliff up ahead. He keeps going full speed, like he is going to turn around up there and come at me head on. Not knowing about the river and cliff, he careens right off the edge, smashing his car to pieces and being thrown out of it, down a hill thick with trees.

I walk down there to see what happened to him, and see no sign of him at all. Suddenly, he appears behind me with a garrote and tries to murder me with it. He exclaims something about being a well known bad guy by the name of ___ (forgot it). I grab the wire from around my neck, and flip him over my head, onto the ground, and kneel on his neck to choke him out.